Newly diagnosed and feeling out of control

Hi demarie

Time will lessen your fears and scares. This bc thing could be seen as a big challenge in life that many long term survivors have shown could be overcome. Stay strong and positive and try to be full of hope for future. You're in my thoughts and prayers .

I remember getting that call back in June and all the emotions that came with it. Those first days were truly the hardest. I have now been through a lumpectomy/sentinel node biopsy and just finished my radiation treatment and will be starting hormone therapy. There are so many advances in breast cancer treatment today. Try to not let not your thoughts overwhelm you and I know that is easier said than done. been there done that. Once you have more information and a treatment plan in place you will feel more in control. Just remember one day at a time. You will get through this.

If it were me, I would call back and ask more about the path report. What type of cancer, how big, ER, PR and HER + or -? I guess I was lucky that I was told immediately so I came on here and researched what it all meant. It kept me busy and my emotions a little more in check.

We are here to help you.

it would be highly unlikely to stage before surgery or some kind of lymph node biopsy. Grade yes. Hormone receptor status yes. Grade I don't think so but you really need to have your own copy of the pathology report. They have to give it to you. And it sounds like you really need it now. Not later. For peace of mind.

Yes it is. I saved this as a favorite thread so I'll see your questions right away. You're not alone in this.

Edge- just reaching out to say I'm so sorry you had the need to find this place, the club no one wants to be a member of.

I hope your hospital visits are fruitful. Most everyone reports back that after dx everything is overwhelming. It is. Once you get a plan in place, most people start to feel a bit better. Hugs.

Edge, please keep us posted on your journey as well!

Demarie -- glad you got some sleep! Let us know as you find out more...

--The Mods

The hardest thing for me to do was give up control. Trust me, it will be the smartest decision that you'll make. Let your doctor's, family and friends help you through this. It's okay of learn more about your cancer and treatment options but focus on staying positive and try to be patient with this process. I'm a doer so the waiting has been difficult or me. I've had to put my trust in others and know that it will be fine. Read, meditate, pray, talk, or do whatever will help you to be calm. Find the best doctors that you can and ask lots of questions. Find out what additional testing you'll need and them scheduled.

HI All, I am 56 and was diagnosed with Stage 1 IDC Breast Cancer last month. I have been to all of the doctors , had all of the tests and now it is time to make a decision and I am at a loss on what to do?? I sure could use some advise/information to help me make my decision. I have a chose between a lumpectomy/sentinel node biopsy or a double Mastectomy and yesterday I saw the final two doctors which was a Radiation Oncologist and Plastic Surgeon. Deep down inside I have always felt that I would get this news one day and it is because I watched my mother at age 50 get diagnosed with breast cancer and then 2 years later it spread to her lungs and she had a lung removed and then in 11/96 she was told she was cancer free and died in 02/97 full of cancer!!. That was 3 months!!!. My Great Grandmother also had Breast Cancer. I watched my mother take her last breath and I cannot express to you my feelings, I was very close to her , I numbed my pain with Drugs for about 10 years during which time i was raising two kids and had a husband. Just only recently I feel that I can finally move on and then this !! I would not even get a mammogram for about 10 years after she died because I was so afraid of getting it. I am so so afraid of getting it again if I have a Lumpectomy and the IORT Radiation at time of surgery. When the doctor was discussing my options she felt I would be a great candidate for this but yesterday I was informed that it is still in a Clinical Trial Stage and I would have to join the trial if I want to proceed with this? I also had Genetic Testing done and was Negative for BRAC 1 and 2 and waiting on the other 13 panels to come back. I truly believe in my heart that my cancer is hereditary and our family is one of many unknown hereditary genes.

My older sister is driving me completely crazy , she is like a dog with a bone and is telling me that they are not telling me everything I need to know about my survior rate and wants me to get a mastecomy. This is also making it harder for me as she is texting me day and night since I finally told her i was not going keep taking her calls because all we do is get in an argument and the last time I spoke with her which was yesterday I told her that whatever my decision is she MUST SUPPORT IT AND THAT IS THAT!! I know my sister and she will never support my decision if it is not for a mastecomy.

If there is someone out there that has gone thru this , seen someone else and can enlighten me with their opinions and facts please please reply back

Debbie

Debbie- first of all, I am very sorry for your family losses. Undoubtedly, going through all of that has cast an enormously scary pall over your own diagnosis. And yes, you must insist your family support whatever informed decision you make. As you proceed through this dangerous terrain, you will find sometimes the people you expect to support you the most and the best fall short of the ideal- they are scared and less informed than you, but that's no excuse. It just is. You can always find correct info in the articles here on bco and non judge mental support. Stay off Dr. Google.

I made the decision you are making a year ago. It was very hard, but I'm happy with what I did. I continued to second guess myself a bit even after, because I felt strongly I wanted it out if my body before year end, so opted quickly for BMX.

From everything I've read, (and my doctors told me the same) the morbidity rates for LX + rads (and make sure they do an Oncotype dx test if your biopsy results show ER+ receptors. It should be on your biopsy pathology report) is very close to a BMX with no rads. Every situation and person is different though. I had reasons for not wanting to do rads. But my Oncotype dx was on the high side, so even though my tumor was reasonably small, they got clean margins and there was no node involvement, chemo was recommended, which I did, and I'm now on Tamoxifen for at least 5 years.

At the end of the day, the difference is if you do LX you will continue to have mammograms and biopsies, possibly more often than before. But you will have your breasts. One needs to think carefully about that. Yes if you do BMX you can opt for recon, but it's never easy, and you can expect at least a couple more surgeries, and you will most likely lose feeling in the reconstructed breasts which can affect sexual gratification. You could get a new primary tumor, but given current treatment/dx protocols, they say they would catch it early, and you would be presented with some treatment options again.

In a BMX scenario, with no recon, like I did, there is no ongoing scanning. They would do manual checkups and follow up on anything suspiscous in the chest or underarm area. Less likelihood of recurrence, less invasive diagnostics, less worry. But not necessarily a longer life. But for some people, they would consider this a better quality of life. It's very personal. Either way your life expectancy, strictly according to the numbers, would be about the same. So you can take some if the fear out of your decision.

Wishing you the very best in your decision. Inform yourself the best you can, then follow your gut.

Zaborowski: I am so sorry about your mom and ugh on your sister pressuring you. That makes me mad. There are some threads about making the decision between mx and lx. Can you tell us your stats? How large is your tumor and what are the characteristics, grade, etc?

LisaAlissa, we're sorry but that's not possible for us. If members want, they can copy their post here, paste it in the other thread, and then come back here and delete it, so the post is not duplicated. Makes sense? Let us know if you need help with that.

The Mods