Just diagnosed-feeling a little overwhelmed
Hi,
I have just been diagnosed with invasive ductal carcinoma, Grade 3 (Scores:= mitosis: 3, Tubules= 3, Atypia = 3). ER-, PR + (moderate to strong intensity, 70% of cells), HER2 - ( Score +1+). My IHC tests will be repeated due to unusual phenotype (I have no idea what that means).
I will be having surgery (lumpectomy) and my sentinel node will be checked for cancer. Depending on final path report after surgery, doctor will then suggest how to proceed.
My daughters haven't stopped crying (they're 25 and 22), and my husband is in shock. I don't know how I feel-overwhelmed, like I am in some kind of bad dream. I am at high risk, LCIS/ADH and have had so many biopsies on my right breast for the past 10 years, so I knew that this was a possibility, but hearing you have breast cancer is surreal.
What do I do now?
Comments
-
One day at a time. This period before having a treatment plan is tough. Lots of waiting. Hang in there
-
Hi Citrinetiff,
Welcome to the BCO Community, we're so glad that you found us!
The waiting is tough but you're not alone here.
Here's a link to some threads that you might like to join.
Let us know if you need any help navigating your way around (we know it can be overwhelming)
Sending cyber hugs your way,
The Mods
-
What you are feeling is perfectly normal. You've been blindsided by the diagnosis and it can seem overwhelming at first. Be kind to yourself and avoid judging yourself for your emotions. It's important to have a support network, and it sounds like you do with your family. Everyone handles things differently and there is no right or wrong response. Once you've received the pathology results from your lumpectomy, and the results of any tests, such as the Oncotype DX, then your doctors will recommend a treatment plan. Your biopsy results indicate that you have IDC, the most common type of breast cancer. Grade 3 is a score of 8 or 9, which is more aggressive, meaning that the cells are growing more quickly than those in a grade 1 or 2 tumour. Try not to panic; this absolutely does not mean that it must be removed asap, today if possible. Grade 3 tumours are more responsive to treatments. Your tumour is hormone receptor positive, meaning that its growth is stimulated by hormones. About 80% of breast cancers are hormone receptor positive - having estrogen and/or progesterone receptors. You are ER-, PR+ (70%), HER2-, ER-,PR+ is the least common of the hormone positive combinations, representing about 2% of breast cancers. This is what they are refering to by an unusual phenotype. Personally, I don't think it will influence the results of the HER2-, but they wish to retest. Depending on the size of the tumour, the core biopsy is a small sample of it, so the testing that is done on the surgically excised tumour is the most important, as several samples from differenct areas will be assessed. Waiting to find out your final pathology results and thus knowing what you are dealing with so that a treatment plan can be determined is truly the hardest time. Try some deep breathing to calm yourself and also do things you enjoy or with other people to distract yourself. If you find your anxiety is bad, or are having trouble sleeping, you may want to consider asking your doctor for a prescription for ativan or xanax. This is a great community of supportive women, who will understand what you are feeling and going through, so come back whenever you need to. Stay strong, I promise it will get easier. Hugs
-
Ridlley, Moderators and downdog, thank you very much for your support and the information you have given me
It is overwhelming and I am trying to take it one day at a time. At this point I feel that I need to reassure my loved ones that I'm fine (although I have some people I can tell my fears to) and your support here is so appreciated.
Thank you.
-
The beginning is the hardest part. I don't think you ever get use to "having cancer". For me it's been almost 5 years since my diagnosis and I still find it hard to believe I had cancer. Take it one day at a time. Once you get more information and a treatment plan it strangely becomes a little easier. Have faith! Hugs!
-
Sorry you have to be here but I know you will find this forum very comforting. The initial diagnosis and waiting for final results is the hardest part of the process. It will get better when you have all the facts. For me telling my kids was the hardest part.The first thought is that you won't he around for long but that is most likely very far from the reality. IMO where you get treated is an important piece of the puzzle.... Hopefully you can get to a university based teaching hospital. Let us know if you have any questions and keep us posted. Good luck
-
May I ask why some of you decided on a lumpectomy vs a mastectomy? I am scheduled for a lumpectomy, but I am wondering if I shouldn't choose a mastectomy. Were there any deciding factors that made you choose one over the other?
-
Nice to meet you Citrinetiff. I'm not far along my BC journey myself yet but I have had surgery.
I have a Multifocal Invasive Lobular Carcinoma. Because it was multifocal; mastectomy was my only surgical option.
Telling my kids was the most difficult thing for me. My daughter is still very quiet and that worries me.
It is all so overwhelming at the beginning but it does get easier. Be kind to yourself. Hugs Donna.
-
I will be having bilateral mastectomy Thursday, November 6th. I chose mastectomy because I did not want radiation, I've been called back for more tests 14 of 20 mammograms, numerous biopsies, etc.
Also, I am not having reconstruction.
-
mtg, dtad, smurfette26, thank you.
cjafarm, thank you for sharing your story. I have been in a similar situation. At least 15-20 needle biopsies, one excisional biopsy 6 years ago and many biopsies since the, so I am wondering if I should get a mastectomy. Did you have a lumpectomy first and then decided on the mastectomy
-
The diagnosis is really the hardest thing. You will be fine! Believe it and that helps your odds tremendously. For real.
-
Citrinetiff,
I'm going directly to the mastectomy. Had a lumpectomy a few years ago on the left and really expected that to be where more cancer would be found. But this time it was the right, so they are both going.
I'm 60 years old and I haven't had any second thought about doing the bilateral and no reconstruction.
-
citrinieffe--did they have you on tamoxifen during the past 10 years since your diagnosis of LCIS and ADH?
Anne
-
awb-- I was diagnosed with LCIS/ADH 6 years ago, and I did not take tamoxifen. For 4 years before and the 6 years after the LCIS/ADH dx I have yearly biopsies on the same breast. It is for that reason that I may opt for a mastectomy.
Alaskagal, I am lucky that I have a great support system and I am just trying to breathe and just takes things one day at a time.
cjafarm-- thank you for telling me your story. I am am scheduled for a lumpectomy, but I am considering a mastectomy.
-
I felt overwhelmed for 2 days after diagnosis - I couldn't make a decision...I couldn't concentrate...I remember telling my son and him looking at me with fear in his eyes. I tried to minimize and make the news a bit casual when I told others...especially my 94 year old mom. I gave them info in stages (told them I would need chemo a while after I told them the diagnosis). My family takes their cues from me - I am positive and optimistic and that helps them. I also have learned that allowing them to help me or give me flowers or chocolate etc. also helps them to cope. They need a role.and something to do.
I chose a lumpectomy because my surgeon explained that the outcomes were similar in terms of disease recurrence and survival between mastectomy vs lumpectomy +R.T. . More importantly, mastectomy would have meant a longer recuperation and may have delayed chemotherapy, which for me, was more of a priority to get started (I have triple negative disease). I had a pretty rapid recovery from my lumpectomy 4 weeks ago and just finished my first round of chemo and am doing well.
My thoughts will be with you during your surgery!
-
livingthis, thank you so much for sharing your story and your supportive words. I am glad to hear that you are doing well, or as well as you can be. I am also being very positive and optimistic, and if I have some fears, I don't tell my family. They, as you say, are taking their cues from me so I'm focusing on the good news: early stage, and hopefully clear nodes.
I will be thinking of you and sending you positive vibes (((hugs)))
-
I am sorry that you have found yourself here.
My surgeon told me that a lumpectomy was not an option for me due to where the two tumors are located and the other images seen on the MRI in the area between them. So mastectomy it is for me when I get to surgery. At this point I am leaning towards bilateral.
-
Cjafarm, I am 63 newly diagnosed ER+ PR+ HER- with very very strong family history (every women 3 generations on Mom's side) I was considering lumpectomy with radiation but after careful consideration I am going to tell Surgeon I want double mastectomy. Peace of mind is worth a lot. I see Surgeon Wednesday to go over final tests results.
Good luck everyone!
-
I am so sorry you're dealing with this, but glad you found this group of amazing people who know exactly what you're going through. Telling my family was very difficult. I have been diagnosed since the end of August but treatment has been delayed because I ended up with a post op infection from a ductal excision. Now I am scheduled for a bilateral mastectomy December. That was a very hard decision for me, and the support here to help me come to that decision has been unbelievable. Everyone makes their own decision, but the guidance we get in helping us come up with a plan that is best for us is invaluable. My choice was just finalized this past week, and I'm certain for me it's best - although I'm still mad and sad about it. This is my second diagnosis - first was 10 years ago so I felt like it was my best option. Take your time - I know that you want to get through it quickly, but make sure your decision is the best for you.
Hugs,
Beth
-
TikkasMom'
My surgery is Friday. I'll keep you updated on my progress. My initial plan is to get moving as soon as possible and to cheer for my Iowa State Cyclones as they travel to Oklahoma to play the Sooners Saturday night
cjafarm
-
Good luck cjafarm , saying a prayer for you and all the other women here.
I have a head CT scan today, I've had balance issues for a year and now occasional headaches. Hoping headaches are just stress and balance is an ear issue. I should have results at Wednesday appointment.
I just want to get this show on the road...
Good luck cjafarm
-
Thank you, everyone. You truly are an amazing group of women.
Skittlegirl --deciding on treatment is so difficult. I am sure whatever you decide will be the right decision.
TikkasMom -- I can understand you wanting a double mastectomy. Please let us know the results, and I hope all the news is good.
BethL --I am so sorry you have to go through this again. I have a few weeks to decide, but I am leaning towards a lumpectomy.
Sending all of you lots of positive vibes.
Citrine
-
I was recently diagnosed after a single surgery that removed two lumps - both DCIS on the right side. Early cancer - stage 0. Surgeon didn't expect cancer, so didn't take a large enough margin. I have an MRI tomorrow to make sure we haven't missed anything else undetected by imaging etc. As long as it's clean, then I'll be having a second surgery to take a larger margin. I'm going to have a course of radiation, then apparently I'll be on estrogen blockers. No suggestion of chemo at this point. I'm scared of the MRI showing more cancer....I haven't told my grown up kids yet - waiting until I get more information. If MRI shows more cancer, I'll push for mastectomy and reconstruction. I don't want to do small surgeries over and over again. Rather have it all out in one swoop.
Scary as this has been, I'm positive I will beat this. I beat ovarian cancer at age 14 (42 years ago), so there's no reason I can't lick this as well. Am I being naïve?
-
Lumpectomy vs mastectomy is a difficult decision. In my case I had 2 small tumors in my left breast. One of them didn't show up on mammo or ultrasound, only MRI. I also had some abnormal cells in my right breast. I have very dense breasts so screening is difficult. This is why I made the BMX decision. You just need to weigh the facts either way.
-
Yes this first stage when there are so many unknowns and so much information to get educated on is definitely the hardest!! I had about a 6 week gap from diagnosis to beginning of treatment. During that time I had all kinds of tests (US, mammogram, breast biopsy, PET scan, breast MRI, genetic testing, and lymph node biopsy). No one on the treatment team could really answer my specific questions until all the testing was done. My MO assured me that the gap in time was okay and that having all the information from the tests was imperative to getting the correct treatment plan. Try to breath and know that it will be easier to think/process things once you have a plan in place. It is a whirlwind of terror right now, I know! Hang in there and ask any questions you have to those of us on the boards.
-
Tikkasmom if you have balance issues it could be an autoimmune reaction to breast cancer called paraneoplastic syndrome, which often affects the cerebellum and can improve after treatment. I have this, and have weird eye disturbances from it. Have antibodies tested for anti-Ri. anti-Yo, and maybe anti-Hu.
-
WOW Windingshores, I'll mention that to Surgeon tomorrow. I saw my CT Scan results on my patient portal this morning and NO masses or other abnormalities. No metastatic disease. So thankful. WOOHOO YIPPEE
Good luck cjafarm with surgery, praying for you and all the other brave women here.
-
Tikkasmom-- YAY! So glad CT is clear! What wonderful news!
I am going for pre-op tests tomorrow, and then I'll make a decision about lumpectomy vs mastectomy. I'm doing okay, but I sometimes have to struggle to keep it together. I'm taking everything one day at a time.
-
I know how you feel. I just got a diagnosis of IDC. I got back the surgeon this Friday the 6th to talk about a Mastectomy, cuz I can't go through anymore biopsies and the torture of waiting for results. I have always had b9 results and this was a kick in the gut for sure. I am so scared.
-
Orlmagic-
We want to welcome you to our community here at BCO. We're sorry you find yourself here, but we are very glad you have joined us. You are not alone, and everything you're feeling is normal. We're here to support you and we're with you every step of the way.
The Mods
Categories
- All Categories
- 679 Advocacy and Fund-Raising
- 289 Advocacy
- 68 I've Donated to Breastcancer.org in honor of....
- Test
- 322 Walks, Runs and Fundraising Events for Breastcancer.org
- 5.6K Community Connections
- 282 Middle Age 40-60(ish) Years Old With Breast Cancer
- 53 Australians and New Zealanders Affected by Breast Cancer
- 208 Black Women or Men With Breast Cancer
- 684 Canadians Affected by Breast Cancer
- 1.5K Caring for Someone with Breast cancer
- 455 Caring for Someone with Stage IV or Mets
- 260 High Risk of Recurrence or Second Breast Cancer
- 22 International, Non-English Speakers With Breast Cancer
- 16 Latinas/Hispanics With Breast Cancer
- 189 LGBTQA+ With Breast Cancer
- 152 May Their Memory Live On
- 85 Member Matchup & Virtual Support Meetups
- 375 Members by Location
- 291 Older Than 60 Years Old With Breast Cancer
- 177 Singles With Breast Cancer
- 869 Young With Breast Cancer
- 50.4K Connecting With Others Who Have a Similar Diagnosis
- 204 Breast Cancer with Another Diagnosis or Comorbidity
- 4K DCIS (Ductal Carcinoma In Situ)
- 79 DCIS plus HER2-positive Microinvasion
- 529 Genetic Testing
- 2.2K HER2+ (Positive) Breast Cancer
- 1.5K IBC (Inflammatory Breast Cancer)
- 3.4K IDC (Invasive Ductal Carcinoma)
- 1.5K ILC (Invasive Lobular Carcinoma)
- 999 Just Diagnosed With a Recurrence or Metastasis
- 652 LCIS (Lobular Carcinoma In Situ)
- 193 Less Common Types of Breast Cancer
- 252 Male Breast Cancer
- 86 Mixed Type Breast Cancer
- 3.1K Not Diagnosed With a Recurrence or Metastases but Concerned
- 189 Palliative Therapy/Hospice Care
- 488 Second or Third Breast Cancer
- 1.2K Stage I Breast Cancer
- 313 Stage II Breast Cancer
- 3.8K Stage III Breast Cancer
- 2.5K Triple-Negative Breast Cancer
- 13.1K Day-to-Day Matters
- 132 All things COVID-19 or coronavirus
- 87 BCO Free-Cycle: Give or Trade Items Related to Breast Cancer
- 5.9K Clinical Trials, Research News, Podcasts, and Study Results
- 86 Coping with Holidays, Special Days and Anniversaries
- 828 Employment, Insurance, and Other Financial Issues
- 101 Family and Family Planning Matters
- Family Issues for Those Who Have Breast Cancer
- 26 Furry friends
- 1.8K Humor and Games
- 1.6K Mental Health: Because Cancer Doesn't Just Affect Your Breasts
- 706 Recipe Swap for Healthy Living
- 704 Recommend Your Resources
- 171 Sex & Relationship Matters
- 9 The Political Corner
- 874 Working on Your Fitness
- 4.5K Moving On & Finding Inspiration After Breast Cancer
- 394 Bonded by Breast Cancer
- 3.1K Life After Breast Cancer
- 806 Prayers and Spiritual Support
- 285 Who or What Inspires You?
- 28.7K Not Diagnosed But Concerned
- 1K Benign Breast Conditions
- 2.3K High Risk for Breast Cancer
- 18K Not Diagnosed But Worried
- 7.4K Waiting for Test Results
- 603 Site News and Announcements
- 560 Comments, Suggestions, Feature Requests
- 39 Mod Announcements, Breastcancer.org News, Blog Entries, Podcasts
- 4 Survey, Interview and Participant Requests: Need your Help!
- 61.9K Tests, Treatments & Side Effects
- 586 Alternative Medicine
- 255 Bone Health and Bone Loss
- 11.4K Breast Reconstruction
- 7.9K Chemotherapy - Before, During, and After
- 2.7K Complementary and Holistic Medicine and Treatment
- 775 Diagnosed and Waiting for Test Results
- 7.8K Hormonal Therapy - Before, During, and After
- 50 Immunotherapy - Before, During, and After
- 7.4K Just Diagnosed
- 1.4K Living Without Reconstruction After a Mastectomy
- 5.2K Lymphedema
- 3.6K Managing Side Effects of Breast Cancer and Its Treatment
- 591 Pain
- 3.9K Radiation Therapy - Before, During, and After
- 8.4K Surgery - Before, During, and After
- 109 Welcome to Breastcancer.org
- 98 Acknowledging and honoring our Community
- 11 Info & Resources for New Patients & Members From the Team