Well I'm exhausted.

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CAMommy
CAMommy Member Posts: 437
edited October 2015 in DCIS (Ductal Carcinoma In Situ)

I had my first follow up post treatment and I find the cancer center just exhausting and depressing. I was rushed through radiation because I was moving. I just saw the new MO for my follow up and my bottle of tamoxifen.

I have to admit I have been tied in knots the past few days before the appointment. I wonder if it will always be like this, every mammo, and follow up will cause me stress.

The good news is the MO said there is a light years difference between DCIS and IDC and I am very lucky to just have DCIS

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  • percy4
    percy4 Member Posts: 477
    edited October 2015

    You ARE very lucky you had "just" DCIS and not IDC. I feel similarly, even though my lumpectomy revealed a microinvasion of IDC. As the markers for that micro were very non-aggressive, my prognosis is almost as good as having had only DCIS. Still. As I have pointed out in recent Posts, I am having to schedule my 2-year-out mammo and have been putting it off. Many recurrences happen at about this point if they are going to, rather than right after, so this mammo is very hard for me. I've been asking myself the same thing. Will I be wary and really upset at every future screening? I think yes. Probably it will get better in time, but never just fine. We are more prone to another cancer now, and that is just a fact. Doesn't mean it will happen. I really forget all about it in between screenings, then, as they approach, it becomes really hard. I know how you are feeling. I will be very happy to let everyone here know when this mammo has been done and is fine. You will probably be fine. Most of us, here at this level, will be fine. The ones who did not turn out to be fine are the ones heard from here, again. The fine ones probably don't Post anymore. Exhaustion is awful, and I feel you. I do think I have to do a little inner work to get myself to a place where I am not so frightened as each mammo approaches. When I discover how to do that a little better, will let you know (not kidding). I don't want to be a slave to fear. xx

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  • percy4
    percy4 Member Posts: 477
    edited October 2015

    To add. While I feel very lucky that I did not have a worse cancer, I definitely do not feel lucky that I had one at at all.

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  • CAMommy
    CAMommy Member Posts: 437
    edited October 2015

    fear is crazy. I'll be thinking of you getting your mammo. I absolutely hate the cancer center. It gives me ptsd just to drive by it. At least I can go into my happy place and forget this all happened until the end of December when I need my first mammo.


    I asked the dr about breast MRI and he never answered me so I guess they aren't in his plan. Now I need to find the courage to start my tamoxifen.

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  • percy4
    percy4 Member Posts: 477
    edited October 2015

    Thanks for thinking about me with my mammo coming up. As I said, it's a particularly scary one for me. Like you, I've been in my happy place, not thinking about it, till now. Still haven't scheduled the damn thing, and it's a month overdue.

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