Shock

Tninj
Tninj Member Posts: 7
edited October 2015 in Just Diagnosed

Hi. I was just diagnosed this afternoon with invasive ductoral carcinoma. I just turned 40 in May and received what I thought was a clean mammogram report from my first (baseline) mamm.

I have a 7 & 4 year old (little girls), and my head is spinning.

I'm so anxious that I haven't eaten or slept since the call.

How can I get through this shock?

Does anyone recommend counseling immediately?

Thank you...

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  • Meow13
    Meow13 Member Posts: 4,859
    edited October 2015

    Tmaj, I called my GP office and the doctor on call prescribed some lorazapam for me. It helped me to fall asleep and cope. I remember a big relief after mastectomy and SNB (showed no cancer in lymph nodes), the relief that the cancer was gone. Then I received the high oncodx number and was thrown into a depression I didn't do the chemo but just hormone therapy. Once you start treatment and you know how it effects you your mind starts to relax. I remember the day I didn't think of my cancer for entire day.

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  • Tninj
    Tninj Member Posts: 7
    edited October 2015

    Thank you for your reply, Meow13.

    I'm in such a weepy fog. I just want to feel like I have a grip. I might ask for something to help me sleep. I am no good to myself or my children if I am sleep deprived. I don't even have an oncologist or surgeon yet. Everything is pulling together, I'm told. As in laying here (it's 3:30am), I decide to put down my phone and try to rest every half hour or so. Then, as I doze- I remember and panic. What a nightmare.

    Should I avoid reading every article & forum online... It's all I've been doing.

    I'm googling oncodx now, so I can have a better understanding of your experience. There just seems to be SO much involved, and so much re-occurrence.

    Warmly,

    Tara

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  • Cherey
    Cherey Member Posts: 12
    edited October 2015

    I got my dx a few weeks ago and I am into Googling thing but I didn't do so with this and I am so glad I just let my medical team explain it all to me. At first I refused to hear anything - I thought maybe denial might work. :) Do what you can to sleep. We need it for so many reasons - especially right now. Gesh, I should be sleeping right now. Taking something now to help.

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  • Smurfette26
    Smurfette26 Member Posts: 730
    edited October 2015

    I'm only a few weeks out from my diagnosis and agree with Meow13; get onto your GP as soon as possible and get something to help you sleep. I resisted taking anything at first but without sleep I wasn't coping at all. I'm taking Oxazepam 30mg now. Just one at night and I'm doing so much better mentally. I am busy and productive during the day and far less emotionally drained.

    Try not to read everything online. Every persons journey is a different one. Just as no 2 people are the same; no 2 cancers are the same. The comfort and support on these boards will help you immensely. Know it has for me. Everything you are feeling is very "normal" and you may not feel this now; but it does get easier when you get your treatment plan. You will find the strength for your girls. Hugs.

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  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited October 2015

    Hi Tara! We are so glad you are here with us! But we hate the reason....so sorry about your recent diagnosis.

    The beginning is really, really hard, but you'll see that once your medical team have a treatment plan in place for you, you'll start to regaining control of your emotions. You'll get through it all!!

    If you want to read and lear more on your diagnosis and next steps, you may want to check out the information we have compiled HERE for the newly diagnosed.

    Please keep us posted on how everything is going, we're thinking of you!

    The Mods

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  • keepthefaith
    keepthefaith Member Posts: 2,156
    edited October 2015

    I agree...get something to calm your nerves and help you sleep. Your body does not need the added stress. The quiet of the nights make it worse. It's hard, but you will get through...one day or even one hour at a time. If you have a nurse navigator or social worker at your medical facility, maybe they can get you some resources to help you also. The American Cancer Society may be a good place to go, too. Every little thing you can do to make yourself feel like you are making progress and taking control, will eventually empower you. Whether it's getting a good nights' sleep, taking a walk, making appts, phone calls, etc. Maybe you can do something special for yourself. It's all very over-whelming, but pretty soon, you will be kicking cancers' butt! ((HUGS))

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  • Italychick
    Italychick Member Posts: 2,343
    edited October 2015

    stay off dr. Google until you know more, and then only to look at treatment options. Things are old, outdated, and most times completely wrong. You can go to being dead in about three clicks. Treatments are much more individualized, and have changed, so even something from two years ago may not be appropriate today. And statistics are constantly changing. And typically online more people with negative comments post, the women who get through things just fine don't usually post. And remember, surgery alone is found to be 70-75% effective all by itself.

    Hugs, you can get through this.

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  • Englishmummy
    Englishmummy Member Posts: 337
    edited October 2015

    Just wanted to send hugs your way. I was dx a month before my 41st birthday, I have 3 children and did not know how I would get through, but you do. It is scary, it is tough... but it does get better, especially once you have all the details on the treatment plan. I second Italychick's view on google, you can't google anything when you don't have full results.  Keep us posted.

    You can do this, as insurmountable as it seems right now (and it IS huge)- you are strong, you can do this.

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  • windingshores
    windingshores Member Posts: 704
    edited October 2015

    When I was first diagnosed I bought a couple of books that helped me get an overview, but I didn't google. Instead, I watched a lot of Netflix until I had more specific information.

    I DID google when making decisions on chemo or no chemo, and the research out there was helpful at times- but that was much later.

    I think our minds go to the worst place when we don't have all the information yet. One of my kids was leaving for school on the other coast and I had visions of me on a death bed preventing her from finishing her program. Etc.

    I got Klonopin or Xanax for sleep the first day, and posted on here about panic, but after the first night I slept okay without. But I think having something on hand made me feel safe about sleep even if I didn't use it much.

    Watch tv or netflix or whatever helps you veg out! Or dance, do yoga, read a mystery, knit, go out with friends, whatever helps. And I think the sleep piece is really important :)

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