Diagnosis confirmed yesterday and barely keeping it together :(

I suggest using those two weeks to see an oncologist. Get your hormone status, HR2 status and oncotype. Information has power. You may want to do chemo first, maybe not, but know your options. I waited a month after diagnosis to see doctors because it was summer and people were on vacation. It was very hard to wait and I needed antianxiety pills. We did fine going out of town - it's about a four hour drive for us.

Thirding Grace's advice, both the "consult oncologists" and the "consider anti-anxiety medication".

Simply doing something, anything, about your diagnosis, prognosis and treatment plan will help allay your anxiety.

You've been given excellent advise by grace and claire. Not sure how the surgeon can be sure you even need chemo without an onco test and a node biopsy. Oncotype testing shows many of us can skip chemo altogether. I too left town to be treated and had my surgery and onco advisement done at a breast cancer center, rather than using a local surgeon and oncologist-I did have my radiation done locally as that is a daily thing. I think the out of town trips were worth it and continue to have follow-ups in the city at the breast center.

This said, 2 weeks is not an unusual wait time for surgery. By the time I got all my surgical opinions (3) and met with an oncologist and had genetic testing to help decide if a BMX was in order (all recommended this if BRCA positive and knowing could save one from having a second surgery) I didn't have surgery until 1 1//2 months after my diagnosis and all, including my onco, agreed there was no big rush/that knowing as much as possible would help me make good choices.

As for holding it together-it's okay to fall apart-really! Be easy on yourself. This is a scary disease and diagnosis and I think all of us have had days when we just don't keep it together.

take a deep breath sweetie, i know its alot to take in now, i would take the time to get 2nd opinion, and stay here with us for support and Hugs!!!!!!, once plan in effect u will not feel so overwhelmed, i had chemo first then L mast, then chemo again and Praise GOD im doing great, in my 21 st yr, Survivor. msphil(idc,stage 2, 0/3 nodes, L mast, chemo and rads and 5yrs on tamoxifen)

Hi.Could you tell me breast cancer surgeons name at Memorial Sloan as I too am looking for one there and am really scared and want to make best choice.

My advice would be to get to the closest university teaching hospital ASAP. You don't have to be treated there but you would want to get their diagnosis and treatment plan. Please believe me when I say that getting a second opinion there will be half the battle. Get someone to stay with your DH. You are just as important and you want to be healthy so you can continue to care for him. As women we sometimes put our needs last but this is very important. Take care and good luck!

Smurfette26, I had about a 4 or 5 five week wait between diagnosis and the start of treatment. During that time, I had genetic testing, breast MRI, PET scan, and probably other things I'm forgetting. I saw my PCP, a breast surgeon, and two medical oncologists. I know you are reeling and trying to wrap your head around this diagnosis but taking some time to read a little bit and talk to several doctors may help you in making any decisions. I did chemotherapy prior to surgery and some people do surgery prior to other treatment (and some don't need chemo or radiation!). It will depend on the type of cancer, your risk factors, etc. I would recommend trying to breath and get information about your specific case from people who can see your records (i.e. your medical team). Sometimes reading general information online is misleading because the cases are completely different from yours. You will definitely find lots of support here on these boards! Use us.

Smurfette: Welcome to this supportive place. I am new here, too, so others will have better practical advice about research and treatment options, but wanted to send big hugs your way. Everything you said is also true for me: the weight of a cancer dx is so heavy when it's you.

I have a part-time job rather than fulltime now and am finding I am not busy enough to keep my mind off this to lessen my anxiety. Can I help you paint your kitchen? Have always dreamed of living in a rural community, but have always lived in suburbs or city.

Please keep us posted, and good luck tomorrow. With you all the way.

I got the same diagnosis on Sept. 16 over the phone also. I had no clue, mine is nonpalpable ( no lump they can feel.) On MRI it measues 2.1 and so far I have had two mamograms, MRI with contrast, and a surgery consult. I will have mapping done on the 21st, a radiation seed planted in the turmor on the 22nd and surgery the 23rd I was assigned a nurse as a support person but I can never get her on the phone so I am in my second week of searching the internet for answers. My house of 22 years burned to the ground this past April 10th so I am in a new state and left friends behind. I am a widow with my dog as support. Do you have family for support? I was told i am having a lumpectomy unless he sees reason to do a mastectomy when he gets in there. Mainly because I live alone, have a bad heart and could also have cervical cancer. I am awaiting tests to get those tests and thenwait for those results. Since its invasive ductal carsonoma I don't want to put the breast surgery off. I am a newby too. Let me know if you need to talk, but thats about all I can do I feel lost and searching for answers too.

Thanks for replying. I have a very busy daughter-in-law, she is in college and raising my three grandchildren. My grandchildren are all in after school activities and I don't want them to have to give up their activities. Plus they have to be dropped off at school and picked up. I pick them up two days a week when my daughter-in-law has late classes. She has told me she will drop her classes to help me if need be, but I don't want her to. My son is overseas and not be back till December of this year, so my daughter-in-law is on her own with three kids, I don't want to impose. She is taking me to surgery and picking me up. She wants me to stay with them right after surgery. I will do that. They have a small house and I don't want to stay long because it just doesn't work. She is keeping my dog until I can handle her again. My dog has the tendancy to walk me not me walking her, if you know what I mean. She is a rescue dog I took in to keep her from being put down. I keep reading that if they remove anything under your arm you have to rebuild the strength in the arm. So that concerns me with Precious (my dog).

So much of this is not knowing how your body will react to the surgery and the radiation & chemotherapy. I visited the MAYO Clinic website and I bought a book from them and I read the book this weekend. I may have to much informtion now, but I got alot of answers I needed. I will focus on that. The book doesn't cover much personal experience and I guess that is why I am utilizing this website. I have talked to the doctor once and will not see him again till the day of surgery. I wanted total mastectectomy but he said he felt a lumpectomy was best so that is what he scheduled. I am on Medicare so I don't know how they work with surgery, etc. That is where the nurse was supposed to help. I will research Medicare online today to see what I can find out. I will tackle my biggest fears first. I have had several surgerys in the past with good private insurance and ended up paying thousands of dollars back that were my copay. I don't want to live like that ever again, working two jobs and living off one while paying off hospitals nd doctors with the other. This is my biggest fear, not the cancer. I can make it through this, I have had my small intestine strangulate twice, thus that equaled two major surgeries. I learned how to care for myself then, I was alone for those but lived where the yard was fenced and I could just let the dog out and then let her back in. Here I have to physically put her on a leash and walk her. She is learning how to adapt to city life, she had 10 acres where we lived before.

Thanks for allowing me to vent, I promise not to post when I am depressed again.

Are you getting the mapping where they mark where your tumor is? I am also getting a radiation seed implanted the day before my lumpectomy surgery. I have yet to meet with the radiologist. He will be doing the implant. Then I meet with another radiologist who will set up the radiation treatments. I just wish it didn't take so long to get it all put into action. With my other surgeries I went in through the ER and they had to be done immediately so there was no waiting or planning to it. I have this week off, I have no more appointments until net week. Then the surgery is the 23rd. It is an out patient surgery. I CAN do this.

Take care I am praying for you. Later.

Hope everything went well for you, let me know. Your in my prayers.

Well mapping was done today and surgery is at 8 in the morning.

Hi, Smurfette. I just wanted to send you lots of hugs. All this waiting is the worst. I hope I can get my head wrapped around this business. Reading through your posts is helpful - at least it's not just me feeling like this.

Thinking about you and hoping everything is ok.