Just diagnosed terrified and need support

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PAE
PAE Member Posts: 1
edited September 2015 in Just Diagnosed

Just told I have t2 n1 breast cancer. Dr suggesting mastectomy because of lymph node involvement. Is that standard advice? He wants to do surgery first followed by chemo then radiation then hormone therapy. Reading some comments on this site I just realized that these treatments will kick me into menopause. No one told me that. Should I be asking others questions or looking at other treatments? I feel so unprepared and lost. Needing some support and advice. Help

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  • littleblueflowers
    littleblueflowers Member Posts: 2,000
    edited September 2015

    Hey there. Deep breath. I'm so sorry you have to be here, but it's a community full of wisdom, kindness, and humor that you joined! Those are good questions to ask your oncologist, and don't be afraid to get a second oppinion. This is a scary time! You will feel more in control once you have a plan in place. Remember, it's all about YOU now and your health. I had a double mastectomy and chemo and radiation. I am currently in chemo pause and have no clue if my period will come back. You should ask about fertility preservation if that is a concern for you! There are many options. In my experience, I was offered either a mastectomy or a lumpectomy. Also weather to reconstruct or not, and remove both breasts or not. It's a very personal decision. Sending love your way!

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  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited September 2015

    Hi PAE-

    We want to welcome you to our community here at BCO. We're so sorry for what brings you here, but we're glad you've found us during this difficult time, and hope you find this to be a supportive and helpful place.

    The first days and weeks following diagnosis can be very scary! Take it one day at a time. Like Little said, you'll start to feel more in control once you have a plan in place. Write down any and all questions you have, so you can remember them when you meet with your doctor. And ask ANY and ALL questions you have, even if they seem insignificant or unimportant to you. It's important to be as informed as possible. Take a look at some links we've put together for our Newly Diagnosed Members, you'll find some helpful information there, and it's a great starting point.

    Please keep us posted on how you're doing, we'll be thinking of you!

    The Mods

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  • Holeinone
    Holeinone Member Posts: 2,478
    edited September 2015

    PAE, sorry you need to be here. The treatment your surgeon mentioned is standard. If you look at most ladies signature line it states what treatments we have had.

    My surgeon was pro lumpectomy, I went with his advice. Easier surgery, no need for reconstruction, less evasive. Some women need a mastcetomy, due to where the tumor is located or the size. Many choose to have that surgery. Ask questions, take some time to consider it. My lymph nodes were bursting open with cancer growing on the outside.

    For most of us, the surgery to have the nodes removed is the most difficult part. They have to cut through nerves & muscle. Removing the tumor from my Breast was easy to recover from. It is just fat & tissue.

    The whole process is a scary roller coaster. Take one day at a time. If you do need chemo, put yourself first. It's usually a 5-6 month process. ( depending....not always ). Join the group here that starts when you do. Ladies here are very supportive, we all understand the anxiety & fear...

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  • Meow13
    Meow13 Member Posts: 4,859
    edited September 2015

    PAE, you should ask your oncologist to have your tumor tested.

    Sounds like you are stage 2 with one node involved and estrogen positive

    You could get an idea if chemo is necessary check into link below.

    http://knowyourbreastcancer.com/symphony-test/

    Or you can have an oncodx test to check your tumor it gives a risk of recurrence and whether chemo is needed.

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  • Meow13
    Meow13 Member Posts: 4,859
    edited September 2015

    Also getting a second opinion is always good advice.

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  • Gabby56b
    Gabby56b Member Posts: 82
    edited September 2015

    I feel like I am so confused...my oncologist said I will be having chemo and radiation after the mastectomy. I want to have reconstruction. The PS said they would delay using my back muscle for my pocket until after radiation. The BS says no one can tell me I need radiation until after the mastectomy. I have already had a lumpectomy and re excision with cancer found in my lymph node.

    I am scared they are going to screw up the surgery. I called my oncologist and had him call the BS. Just difficult having a decision made while i am in the middle of surgery.

    trying to not fall apart over this, but I feel like I can't take any more. I am also facing placing my 92 year old mother into hospice.

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  • msphil
    msphil Member Posts: 1,536
    edited September 2015


    hi sweetie, yes i did go into early menopause, hot flashes, but i was glad to be rid of periods, i had chemo first then L mast, then chemo after and 5yrs on tamoxifen, period was off after couple chemo treatments, came back for awhile after treatment, then all together, it was YEAH!!!!!! for me,to Inspire is why i continue to come back here, i am now a 21 yr SURVIVOR(Praise GOD). msphil(idc,stage2, o/3 nodes,Lmast, chemo and rads and 5 yrs on tamoxifen)

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  • Alicethecat
    Alicethecat Member Posts: 535
    edited September 2015

    Hi PAE

    The wonderful Msphil came to my aide three and a half years ago when I'd just been diagnosed and was terrified too. It was wonderful to hear from an 18-year survivor then - and she's a 21-year survivor now - and I hope you will take heart from hearing from her too.

    In brief, you'll discover that different doctors have different views on how aggressively - or not - to treat Stage 2 cancer. There are a host of factors they have to take into account - cell type, grade, hormone markers, HER2+, genetic factors, age, nodes - and then they consult national guidelines/cancer team and literature and more before they advise you. The docs try really hard to help. Sometimes the advice they give is unequivocal - seems pretty clear - but othertimes there may be more than one plan of action they suggest.

    In my humble opinion, then it comes down to how you perceive risk. There is a thread re lumpectomy or mastectomy on this site that covers the subject from many angles and also threads on treatment too.

    There are millions of women in the world who have had breast cancer and been treated and survive. Why not you?

    Alice


    t







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  • rae41
    rae41 Member Posts: 6
    edited September 2015

    Hello Pae and others,

    I'm so glad to have found this forum. I was diagnosed on Sept 1st 2015 with IDC. I have a family history and am currently waiting on genetic testing to come back. My surgery is scheduled for Oct 9th 2015. If I'm positive for the mutations, I will be having a double mastectomy for sure. I'm leaning that way anyway. My surgeon said I'm stage 1 unless my lymph nodes are involved which I wont know till after surgery. I am hopeful that they are clear. The mass (1.9 cm) was not visible on mammogram, I found it myself. I can not stress self breast exams enough!!!!!!. My breasts are so dense that even after it was located on ultrasound and they knew exactly where it was, they still couldn't find it on Mammogram. I am planning immediate reconstruction with skin extenders and eventually silicone implants. I agree with the others, you are in charge and unless you feel like your questions have been answered, keep asking and share how you're feeling with your doctors. I spent 5 hours seeing each of the doctors that will be involved with my surgery and aftercare at UK Markey Cancer center in Lexington Ky. This has been a whirlwind, and I wouldn't wish it on anyone. We are all strong as women, but if we have an intimate relationship with God, we are so much stronger. I couldn't and wouldn't do this without Him! God bless each of you my survivor sisters! Isaiah 41:10

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  • Trvler
    Trvler Member Posts: 3,159
    edited September 2015

    Can I ask how old you are? And how big your tumor is? My best advice to you is to take a deep breathe and don't feel like you need to make a quick decision. I won't bore you with the reasons I had a BMX but I will say this. The decision on who does your surgery both BMX and PS should not be made lightly. It has a HUGE impact on your results and future quality of life. It concerns me when you are talking about using back muscle (or ANY muscle) in your recon. That can be very painful. I went to two of the top PS's in my area before deciding to go out of state for surgery. I am convinced had I done otherwise, I would be in much worse condition than I am in now. I had my surgery 2 weeks ago and I was off pain pills in a week. A friend who had the same surgery that I did was in pain for a while after surgery.

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  • Nancy2581
    Nancy2581 Member Posts: 1,234
    edited September 2015

    Hi PAE - sorry you found yourself here, but you'll learn so much from these ladies. I was stage II with one lymph node involved. I had a lumpectomy though. My clinic is pro lumpie. I then went on to have chemo, radiation and I'm now on hormone therapy (tamoxifen). It did kick me into menopause, but that's ok for me. This will get easier once you get a treatment plan in place. The beginning is awful.

    Hugs

    Nancy

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  • msphil
    msphil Member Posts: 1,536
    edited September 2015

    hello sweetie, im so glad n humbled to know i am making a difference in helping those goin thru what ive been thru 21yrs ago, Praise God,i come back here to Inspire n give Hope, as i needed also, i was 42, n makin wedding plans, i found lump, i was working in medical field for 15 yrs in O R, then 7 in city clinic when diagnosed, i wondered why me, now i see why not me, cause i now see my reason on this earth, so sweetie have Hope, we r All daily in my prayers. msphil(idc,stage2,0-3 nodes, Lmast, chemo, rads n 5yrs on tamoxifen)

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  • msphil
    msphil Member Posts: 1,536
    edited September 2015

    alicethecat, im glad that i could make a difference for u and i pray many others, i believe thats why im still here, i wrote book bout my journey thru this, "The Healings Of Breast Cancer", A Physical n Spirtual Healing Of Body n Soul, portions of sales go to Americam Cancer Society, its on Amazon.com n Barnes &Noble, we r daily in my prayers, i feel we are family here.msphil(idc,stage2, 0-3nodes, Lmast, chemo n rads and 5yrs on tamoxifen.

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