Thinking about Death as a breast cancer survivor

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MinnesotaBarb
MinnesotaBarb Member Posts: 46
edited August 2015 in Mental Health: Because Cancer Doesn't Just Affect Your Breasts

As a breast cancer survivor, death comes into my thoughts. Instead of avoiding thinking about the big "D", try my thoughts below to help ease the fear? Let me know what you think! http://www.curetoday.com/community/barbara-tako/2015/08/cancer-death--dying-i-dont-want-to-die-and-i-dont-want-it-to-hurt

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  • Meow13
    Meow13 Member Posts: 4,859
    edited August 2015

    I like the article. For me they idea of literally having my body suffocate from cancer and the discomfort before death is the worst. We all have to die sometime for me I'm 57 not 30 so I don't have the anger of not living a full life. I would like to see grandchildren but it may not happen. Atleast, I will see my kids get into adulthood. I find myself at peace with transitioning to heaven (hopefully heaven).

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  • Meow13
    Meow13 Member Posts: 4,859
    edited August 2015

    It is interesting talking to my husband's aunt (will be 100 in 2016). She had BC in her 60's and it didn't come back. She is in pretty good shape just has some minor cognitive issues but she is with it. She is angry almost like she feels left behind no one of her generation in the family is alive. Almost every friend or peer is gone.

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  • Trini213674
    Trini213674 Member Posts: 4
    edited August 2015

    I watched my younger sister (38), and only sibling, die from breast cancer last December 2014. It was the most painful experience in my life thus far even though I, myself (43), was diagnosed in March of this year with breast cancer. I am well aware that we all have to die some day, but having cancer brings home that reality. I know that my life span has shortened. I think about dying all the time now, it seems to be consuming my thoughts constantly. I want to live long enough to care for my sister's kids (17 and 12), who now live with me. I want to be around to see them grow into adults, to prepare them for my death. They have already lost their mother, losing me now will totally devastate them again and this is my major concern with this "kill joy" cancer.

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  • Sunny_Girl
    Sunny_Girl Member Posts: 111
    edited August 2015

    Meow - my husbands grandfather lived to be 100 years old. Like your aunt - I think he just missed his contemporaries. He had a family who loved and adored him - but everyone who was in his world growing up & in adulthood were all gone. I used to tease him and say he was stuck with us - the B team

    We got to spend the day with him the day he died - it was very hard, but I wouldn't trade it for the world. We got to tell him how much we loved him.

    MinnesotaBarb - thanks for posting the Cure article. I don't want to think about any of it, but being on this board, with other people that unfortunately have this same reason for being here helps me think about issues that others might not quite understand. Thanks again

    Patty

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  • vlnrph
    vlnrph Member Posts: 1,632
    edited August 2015

    Trini, I can't imagine being in your situation but, with the "statistics" as listed in your signature, your prognosis might actually be pretty good! Websites like cancer math allow us to input data and get a result indicating length of survival following various treatment plans. Not a guarantee of course, however anticipating a life span abbreviated by 3 to 5 years (dying at 76 instead of 80) is way better than resigning oneself to an even earlier grave.

    That being said, have you thought about genetic testing?

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  • kittysister
    kittysister Member Posts: 212
    edited August 2015

    I feel like I've lived a pretty full and sometimes exciting life (at 66). I always worried that I would not live long enough to see my granddaughter grow up .... but I have done that. It isn't exactly death that worries me. It's the process. I don't want my family to watch me suffer in any way and maybe even hold a vigil at my bedside. Does that sound stupid? It would just be so hard for them. Even when I have the flu or something, I just want to be alone and not worry anybody. Maybe I'm weird.

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