Feeling of Urgency about life

I am almost four years out from my initial diagnosis. I have had a double mastectomy, chemo and radiation. So far no recurrence but it is a dark cloud I feel that I have to outrun. I'm not sure if that makes any sense but it seems like I am always moving, going, seeking new adventures. Since my diagnosis I've started sailing, kayaking, jeeping etc. I feel like if I don't try all the things in life now, I may find out that someday I've run out of time. I don't know if that makes sense to anyone else but I had a friend make a comment about it last night and it really bothered me. It seemed kind of critical. Like it's changed me in a bad way.

I guess I just want to hear that it is normal for someone who has been through the hell of fighting breast cancer to seek out the things that you would regret not trying if the worst would come to pass someday.

Comments

  • april485
    april485 Member Posts: 3,257
    edited June 2015

    I think you are perfectly sane and normal for what it is worth. Breast cancer is a life altering event. It sounds to me like you realized you are not immortal and that any time, things could and do change, leaving us wishing we did this or that. Go for it! You are totally right!

  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited June 2015

    Dear S_Berry, Welcome to the BCO community. We are very glad that you reached out here. We are certain that there are other members who can share similar stories about living life after a breast cancer diagnosis with a sense of urgency. If you do not get any responses here you may want to explore the topics under the forum entitled Share Your Experiences after a Breast Cancer Diagnosis. There are some topics there that may be of interest or you can start your own. Let us know if you need any help. Stay connected and keep us posted. The Mods

  • farmerlucy
    farmerlucy Member Posts: 3,985
    edited June 2015

    I'm 3+ years out and while I don't expect to see it again I have cleared out about half the cabinets in my house and either tossed stuff or donated it with the thought that no one else should have to deal with it.

  • vettegirl
    vettegirl Member Posts: 235
    edited June 2015

    I am doing the same thing as you...doing new things, on the go a lot more, have more friends now, feel like I don't want to get ripped off.  It is kind of like Tim McGraws song "live like you are dying".  I don't see it as a bad thing.  Before-I was so focused-saving $$-working towards retirement.  Now-I could care less about $$..and I am spending it now...within reason of course.  I completely understand how you feel...I bet it is more common than we know with the ladie's on this board.  I already told my husband too that if this mess comes back-we are both quitting work-and we are going traveling.  I refuse to get ripped off.

  • lyzzysmom
    lyzzysmom Member Posts: 654
    edited June 2015

    S. Berry I think you are absolutely normal. BC does make you reevaluate priorities.Since diagnosis I was lucky to be able to go part time at work and really do have a bucket list. There are a few places I want to visit with my camera and have booked a trip/workshop for next month. If it works out I will plan a more extensive trip, maybe to Arizona for next summer, God willing.

    i am very fortunate to have travelled during my life and was also a keen windsurfer when younger so my list is not long but there are a few things I would really like to do sooner rather than later as I do suffer with a lot of fatigue and nobody knows what the future holds.



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