anyone starting chemo in Nov 2005

Oh Anna, I so wish I had been there with you. I had a good cry today too. I will go into detail when we meet up.

Did I have the right number? I called you this am. Wasn't sure if you went because of the hard rain. I think maybe it was good for you to have that time today for you.

I may have called to late. Is it 540 or 703??????

I ended up doing a lot around the house today for momma. I think I just needed to regroup. First time I have spent time here since daddy passed. I just felt a little to overwhelmed.

I will be waiting for your call.

Kim, I'm thinking of you. I'm still waiting for my reconstruction to begin.

Hugs to all my sisters, I always have you close to my heart. And more this past week .....

Love you guys
ML

Speaking of crying!! I went for a massage - my first ever thanks to a good friend that had given me a gift certificate. I had to sit in the room afterwards and compose myself because I couldn't stop crying. The massage felt so good. And it was so totally opposite of all of the medical touching that I've had over the last 12 months. I plan on making another appointment for when these next scans, mammos, x-rays, and doctors appointments are over in the next few weeks.

Hugs & prayers for all!!
LAT56

I want to quote "You've Got Mail" where they mention how the fall weather makes you think of bouquets of freshly sharpened pencils. So close to my heart, since I was a teacher before becoming a mommy and breast cancer WARRIOR!

Anna-I am sooooo intrigued by the music you heard. Where can I hear it? I love that kind of music-it is so soothing and can lull you to another place in just a moment's time.
I'm so glad to hear about our spirits lifting. These were a tough few weeks for us! Gheesh.
I'm volunteering for our church garage sale and having the BEST time getting first dibs on the stuff people have donated. Greg has to tell me to control myself. I already have a box full of goodies I am claiming. Whee!

Time for bed. Lots of love to all!
Love and prayers, Deb

I couldn't get that piece of music out of my mind, so I called one of my friends who was working at our group's booth on Sunday and asked her to go to those people and ask them if they had the piece on one of their CDs. I didn't know the exact name, but I told her to remind them of the woman who pretty much lost it and had to hide her face while they were playing. My friend called me last night and she got the CD! The name of the piece is "The Way to Skye" and my friend told me the people did in fact remember me and wrote me a sweet note. I am going over to get the CD and note from my friend right now. I'm just waiting for the installer to finish installing the drapes I ordered last May. I had forgotten how beautiful they are. I think I will have to move into my living room. When hubs comes home later I think he might decide that we should have drapes in the bedroom, too. They do so change a room.

Still on a high after getting what I wanted from my onc. It's a little sad that getting an order for a medical test should change my outlook so much. I wonder if doctors realize how much power they have over our frame of mind.

Debbie, don't forget that you just spent lots of time weeding through and getting rid of stuff in your house. If you buy the things other people have weeded through and gotten rid of, just guess what you'll be doing five/ten years from now. I know, cause I've been there, believe me. Watch out....

What absolutely gorgeous weather again!

Love, Anna

Deb, D-day for scans is Monday the 16th. Almost 1 year to date of my "anniversary". I will probably get some results on my "anniversary" on the 18th. Sigh...rough week ahead.
Thanks for all the support, hugs and prayers.

Kim

Anna, whenever I bring up my sex life, my onc about turns purple. Poor guy- we went to college together- didn't really know each other. Maybe he went into oncology to avoid talking about sex. Anyway, I will ask my gyn about est products when I see her in 6 months.

I haven't had dryness( well, it seems pretty moist), but can tell my tissue is thinning, because was some burning during and after intercourse. I want to avoid estrogen if possible due to my highly aggressive and highly er+ tumor. So I have tried coconut oil with much luck. Heard about it on the mojo thread. I buy the organic, extra virgin (ha ha) kind at the health food store and use a little every other day or so. It is a semi-solid that eventually melts. It seems to fatten up and hydrate the tissues and also is a great lubricant. I have noticed no pain during and very minimal afterwards since I started using the coconut oil.

I wonder when someone is going to ask me why I have a gigantic jar of coconut oil in my shower!

Alright, now you all know way more about me than you need to!

And I will be thinking of you Kim next week!! Here's for some dang good results!!

LOL, I'm right behind you Anna.

Anna, what was the groups name that you saw at Waterford? I think they are the same group I saw in Harper's Ferry one year at Christmas. It was in a beautiful church there. I remember looking at the stained glass, and tears falling down my cheeks. I had to regroup fast also, I was with a male friend at the time.

I was at mom's when that entered my thoughts. After I read your post.

To the rest of my sisters, I have really been way down in the dumps, and just feel as if life has slipped away. I really don't know how to get past this feeling, but it is the reason I have not been around to often the past two weeks.

Michael and I will be going out of town this weekend to North Carolina. I hope I have a better trip than last week. That was a complete disaster.

Mary Lou, I hope you have a wonderful trip this weekend. I don't know how it is that families can do such a number on us. I can tell who my husband has been talking to on the phone simply by the way he moves when I walk into the house. Ours is a "blended" family, and boy, is it difficult to keep things smooth. In my heart I believe that a terribly destructive situation created by one of the members of this family I have is what weakened me just six months before my diagnosis. I had created a beautiful holiday for all of us and I thought things were going perfectly and everyone was really getting along when total and willfull destruction happened. I was full of sadness and lost my will to go on for a while there. Things were very unresolved and I was still full of pain when I got my diagnosis and I can't really say everything is okay now, but I can say that every day I do my best to let go and not let others control my thoughts and feelings.

I send you my healing thoughts.

The performers' names are Wendy Barlow and Bob Bellamy, and the song was "The Road to Skye." I played it twice yesterday and just love it. I don't want to play it too often lest it lose its zap, you know what I mean?

There's something about Celtic music that pulls my strings. Just like Latin music makes me want to move.

I had no trouble finding the coconut oil. I'm going to give it a try and have put that estrogen cream away for now.

Today I go for a bone density test. I had osteopenia before bc and am hoping to control it with exercise. My gyn days an AI could put me at risk for osteoporosis, and she doesn't want to put me on any bone strengthening medication like Boniva or Fossomax because there have been cases of jaw bone necrosis in people who had chemo before going on those meds. So it seems I will have to "bone up" on my own in the gym.

Tomorrow I go in for a MUGA. Lots of tests this week!

Love,

Anna

Debbie, I want to hear all about that professional organizer and what you learn from her. Please!

I spent five hours at the hospital for that MUGA! Most of it in the waiting room, gosh, am I ever tired now! The technician told me Fridays are the worst day to have a test done in a hospital, because all the doctors send their patients for unscheduled testing before the weekend, and patients have priority, of course. I'll know better next time.

I hope everyone has a good weekend.

Smelling like a coconut might take a little getting used to....

Hugs,

Anna

Odalys, that is too funny that you know me well enough to know that I am definitely the type to blush at sex talk, even though I've had it! I have no idea why, either. I think it is obvious that my hubby and I are intimate if we have a kid, but I just giggle like I am 12 if I'm discussing that sort of thing!
Time for bed, but I will tell you guys as much as I can about the organizer. I just love what she has done so far!
Oh, I've been thinking of our get-together. There are some websites (I tore out an article, don't know where it is right now), that offer extremely CHEAP airfare if we are willing to book the flights only 72 hours in advance. I thought that might be an option, or I wondered if we could take advantage of one of those major airline deals where we could all fly to, say Miami for only $50? What do you all think?
Ok, time to sleep now!
Love and prayers, Debbie

LOL Deb about the blushing. If you really want to blush- tune into the chat room sometime. I was late to the nutrition chat (california time) and popped in when everyone was talking about mojo. I mentioned the coconut oil and how I keep a jar in the nightstand and one in the shower. The gals were all hilarious and one said she was going to buy 3 jars- one for her shower, one for her nightstand and one for her car "because you just never know!"


OOOOOHHH Miami/Florida would be great! $50 from CA?

Anyway, I am trying to get into the her2 vaccine trial up in Seattle. I would have to go there 7 times in 12 months. I should be finding out in the next couple of weeks. Need to get compression sleeves. We have a lymphedema clinic about to open. We are totally underserved in that area here. Hurry up people!

Anyway, if I do the trial it may put a dent in any extracurricular travel plans.

Hope everyone has a nice weekend. We are so busy with the kid stuff. Sometimes I think the parents have more homework than the kids!

P.S. Odalys- I am here to tell you there is great sex after ooph. DH and I have a new level of intimacy and it is wonderful.

WOO000-HOOOOO!!!! Let's start thinking of a date/weekend for our first official reunion! I'm getting all hyper about the possibility that I can actually meet up with you guys!
Odalys, do you want me to start checking into the major airline deals, and you check into the spa stuff?

LOL-I loved the statement about the coconut oil, and all the places to keep it! I'm ready to run to the store to give it a try! Perhaps (blush) I will be the person to keep a jar in every room in the house......

Time for bed! Love you guys!
Love and prayers, Debbie

Ouch! I am glad the car got hurt and not you and your hubby. Those big pile-ups- what a nightmare. I think you have had enough bad luck Mary!

Glad you are safe and sound.

The last time we heard from our Kaye was in early May. I hope she is gaining strength and can come to post with us again soon. I miss you, Kaye, and hope you get to do that traveling.

Love, Anna

Hey everyone,
I just want to apologize for not being around much and responding to all your posts. I have been in a funk and until I get these test results back I can't seem to kick it. Monday was an exhausting day, but the tests are over. My onc. is on vacation until Friday. It stinks because I know his office has the results and we can't find out until Friday. I don't want to talk to another doctor or nurse, so we wait until Friday.
Just all know that I think of you every day and the post about mojo made me laugh and smile.

Kim