Anyone Else Obese?

SweetHope · December 2014

I was a string bean growing up. After menopause I started adding pounds. So I started drinking diet waters which sent me into heart palpitations, cardiologist visits with several different Rx, and finally Lexapro which added 70 pounds! Realized too late that I was reacting to sugar substitutes. Quit Lexapro, only drank clean water, no food with fake sugars, and joined a gym and weight watchers. I lost thirty pounds and felt great until my knees couldn't even take water aerobics. Hit a plateau and gave up on losing weight. So I get several X-rays, thinking I might get treatment for my knees, but they reveal my breast cancer. So here I am on Norco daily from the ALND nerve damage and cording and twenty pounds heavier since first lumpectomy.

I know how to lose weight, so I'm not asking for suggestions. Please, no diet suggestions! But most of the threads I have read these past several weeks are from my beautiful cancer sisters who are very active and only worried about a few pounds. Our cancer journey is similar in many ways, but I am fat. I am fat, I am 65 and slower than ever, and I'm 99% ER+ and 90% PR+. My journey, besides chemo and radiation must include dieting and more exercise (on bum knees). That is so depressing!

Yeah, I'm mad...at myself. But more so, I am lonely. Is anybody out there?

angelia50 · December 2014

I'm right there with you. Been too heavy for years, even had gastroplasty years ago, but they didn't have it perfected back then, so didn't do a lot for me. I had knee replacement about 7 years ago. I am also ER positive and read where fat can store the estrogen so lord knows, mine has stored plenty. I joined a gym right after surgery but sorry to say, haven't gone much. I'm like you, I know how to cut back and I have figured out, there is no magic diet, just cutting back works for me better than being overly strict. Needing to lose a lot of weight isn't like 10-15 lbs. You can only starve yourself for so long. Actually, my husband and I had been cutting back for a few months this past summer and I had lost some and when this cancer thing came up, I said forget it, if I'm going to have chemo and all of that, I"m not starving myself. So, thankfully, I didn't need chemo but after having 2 surgeries and being afraid all the time, I can't say I've been really committed to being on a strict diet.

daisylover · December 2014

Hi SweetHope,

I was a string bean growing up as well - not so much any more! I understand your angst. I have recently (holidays) put back on 5 pounds of the 30 that I lost through great effort in the past year and a half... I know that my problem is lack of self discipline. I have allowed myself many treats... I celebrate and console myself with favorite foods... my mother did as well, and, I have taught my daughter to do the same. She is a rower at college and can afford the calories at this point. However, everyone's lifestyle and metabolism slows eventually. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

I have bad knees (misaligned, alta patella, chondromalacia patellae - surgery recommended) as well as sacroiliac pain. I have found a solution that works for me. I ride a recumbent stationary bike at low tension 10 miles per day (about 45 min). I have to ride at low tension to keep my knees from freaking out, swelling and catching in pain. I have tried raising the tension - it always ends badly... I can not ride a regular stationary bike due to my back issues, but recumbent is fine - not sure why. My mom had osteoarthritis in her back and had a knee replacement. She rode a recumbent stationary bike as well. I try to ride daily but have had some issues with fatigue due to my trial drug, Palbociclib. My brother is a family practice doctor and has promoted exercise to me in a big way. He told me it's as important as the drugs. That has motivated me a lot. He says 1 hour per day. I'm trying. (Sears has some budget bikes. If you are investing, make sure that you try it out first, though.)

I had some ALND pain, tightness, swelling issues as well. I have had those mostly resolved by physical therapy - I am seeing an awesome therapist who specializes in breast cancer and lymphedema. I feel like PT should be offered to all BC surgery patients - I had to ask repeatedly for a referral/prescription. I found my specialist through BCO! Maybe you could find some resolution for that pain? I also rehabbed my knee after a fall by doing physical therapy. I love PT.

I can totally empathize. And, I know it is easy to gain weight. I hope and pray that you will find a way to exercise - I think that's the key to feeling better and losing weight. Once you lose a little more weight, your knees should feel better - at least that's how it works for me. This cancer diagnosis thing is disturbing enough to drive anyone to eat. I did benefit from a strictly healthy eating approach when first diagnosed - I cut out sugar. I am way less focused now. I just try my best. Take care of yourself.

SweetHope · December 2014

Angelia, I agree...I'm not committing to dieting with chemo and rads hanging over me. Cheetos have gotten me through some very dark moments recently .

Daisy, I put my gym membership on hold but when I restart, I'm heading straight for the recumbent bicycle. Thanks for the advice. My BC says not to baby my ALND arm and the issue should be resolved within four months. But cording is becoming an issue and I may need some PT.

After my first post, I headed out the door and went for a walk. Previous attempts ended with a lot of ALND pain. But today was different...the pain would come then go. It's been several hours and still no pain pill. That's something! The test will be tonight. I would love to get through it without a pill.

Thanks for being here for me; but also sorry you are here. I don't feel so alone now.

P.S. Did you notice that I added my picture ?- taken 20 less lbs. ago, a month before dx.

wrenn · December 2014

I'm fat and getting fatter. I was cut off chemo on the first round so i was told to try a low fat diet. I joined an integrative health centre where they have fantastic nutritionists and I have learned a lot over the year...and gained 20 lbs.

Part of my problem is that I go back and forth between thinking that my triple neg is coming back so I might as well enjoy life eating my favourites to thinking that I can avoid a recurrence if I get it together and start eating better. I really think I am an addict. Food is my medicine.

Diets made me fatter than I should be. I have plump sisters who didn't diet and evened out at 'round'. I dieted for years and ended up obese. Once again I intend to try to get it together this week. *sigh*.

Best wishes to all who struggle with this beast.

glennie19 · December 2014

sweethope: I would definitely go to PT. Find a lymphedema specialist and get checked out. You want a good set of measurements before anything happens.. hopefully never,,,, but since you seem to have some cording, I would recommend seeing someone. Let them advise you on exercise, start slow, building up slowly. Let them work on the cording. You don't want to baby the arm, but you don't want to go too fast either.

SweetHope · December 2014

Wrenn, how could anyone from such a beautiful place as Vancouver be fat? I've got a good excuse...New Orleans...duh! The home of butter. But Vancouver! I'd be outside every day doing cartwheels in that part of the world. Although I didn't make it to your town, I visited nearby Friday Harbor and fell in love with the fresh air, deep clear icy blue ocean and crisp, clean air.

Hope you aren't offended, but I cracked up laughing when you wrote about the fantastic nutritionalists and the subsequent 20 lbs. gained. It's so true, knowledge doesn't burn calories.

(((Hugs)))

angelia50 · December 2014

Sweethope, Cheetos are my drug of choice many times too. I used to do real estate and while waiting for a contract or something that was really causing my nerves to frazzle I would think, let me stop at the Minit Mart, get some Cheetos and go home and eat those and drink a big ice tea. Never been a drinker, smoker or even a chocolate person but salty or sour snacks are my weakness.

flaviarose · December 2014

I'm glad to find a place to talk to other fat people :-)

I've been fat most of my adult life. I was a somewhat chubby kid, but gained most of my weight with both of my pregnancies, weight that has never come off. I've been on a diet many times. Tried many things. Have lost and regained more weight than I can count. A few years back my chiropractor had some kind of program - went through it and after the first week gained weight. I already eat sensibly. I try to exercise, but don't have a lot of motivation and stamina. After my diagnosis I freaked out and stopped eating a lot of things and with chemo which made me puke a lot I lost about 30 pounds. Have gained back 20. sigh. I keep trying to take walks, and when the weather is nice, I go outside. Recently the weather has been bad, so I do "walk away the pounds" videos, and recently got some zumba videos. I know it is important to keep trying to eat healthy foods, skip the sweets and keep moving, and I try. But I'm still fat. so it goes. 5'1" tall, 195 lbs.

wrenn · December 2014

Sweethope, would love to find the city where I would magically not be fat. We have butter here too and I bet you can do cartwheels in New Orleans. If only I could blame my habitation for my body habitus.

PeggySull · January 2015

New research from Canada (a big clinical trial) has found that daily activity level including exercise was more predictive of an extended life in years and was more important than weight.

Hugs,

Peggy

tangandchris · January 2015

I'm soooo happy to see this thread!! I woke up this morning feeling so crappy about my weight and my lack of motivation of doing something about it. I ate so bad last night and I don't even know why I do this to myself. I've struggled with weight my whole life and over the last 5 or so years I've been at my heaviest. I too lost weight during chemo, about 20 lbs, but damn it if I haven't gained it all back and a little more.

I saw MO yesterday and my blood sugar was a little high. She suggested that it could be due to eating right before I came in, but she still told me that I needed to watch it and stop eating "white food". I know I know...right?? My goal in the new year was to walk on my lunch breaks and that has yet to happen.

I have this really skewed thought process about all of this too. I think that I'm just gonna screw it up, so why even start? Total defeatism...and I hate it. I AM going to walk today since it is gonna be a nice day.

((hugs))

wrenn · January 2015

I am now more afraid of having a stroke or heart attack than I am of cancer. Eating more from the stress of recurrence has now become more of a problem than the cancer stuff. I eat to soothe and need to find another way. It is worse when you keep hearing the way to avoid recurrence is to eat healthy and lose weight.

Spookiesmom · January 2015

I see some familiar names here. Hi Tang, Wrenn! I'm fat, no, obese. I lost about 35 from chemo, what a way to loose, huh? I was soooo happy about that. Told myself to keep it going I needed to move. Took a good year or so to recover from treatment. Last New Years, I decided I was ok enough to walk. Never happened.

Same thing this year. Have gone back to my old eating habits, arimadex a d joint pain keeps me on the recliner.

Going to try to find an indoor heated pool just to walk in. Supposed to be easier on your joints. Then I need to find some kind of swim attire I can stuff this lard butt into, and no boobs

wrenn · January 2015

Spookiesmom, I refused to wear a swim suit in the old days because my boobs rested on my waist no matter what type of suit. I am about to go to a cancer retreat where they advised bringing a swimsuit for the hot tub. My first response was "yay. no swimsuit/boob problem this year".

silver lining?

tangandchris · January 2015

Hi spookie and wren

Has anyone ever considered bariatric surgery? My BS works with a surgeon who specializes in that and I've been tossing around the idea. Seems extreme...but maybe its a solution. *sigh*

I walked on my lunch break today so that is something

Spookiesmom · January 2015

Yea Tang!!!! A woman I worked with had been on EVERY diet in creation. Lost some, gained back more. She decided to do the surgery. All the crap she had to do!!!!!! Tests, X-rays, shrink, dietician!!!!!! But still, she almost had me convinced. So she did it. Only supposed to eat small meals, good stuff only. It was always somebody's birthday there, always cake or such.

She'd sit there, stuff it in, then go puke it up. Or a large bowl of oatmeal. She was T2, btw.

Last time I saw her she's only lost 30#.

I've heard it's very hard to adjust to your new way of eating, and most fail with it. I'd rather have a better chance of a better outcome

Fionascottie · March 2015

I see it has been a couple of months since anyone posted, but I'm hoping this thread is still active! I was diagnosed almost a year ago. At that time I was obese, but exercising regularly with a trainer in a group setting. When chemo started I became a fixture on the sofa most of the time. I felt bad about 2/3 of the time. I was never nauseous, but things tasted awful and I lost 6 pounds over almost 5 months. THEN, food began to taste good again and I ate whatever I wanted! Those 6 pounds and at least 6 more have hopped on. My clothes are tight, I'm mad at myself! Chemo cost me my hair of course, and it has come in white. I had been coloring it for a long time so I don't even look like myself. People I know often don't recognize me. I feel fat and older. I'm 64, 5'3" and over 220lbs. I've got to get rid of this weight, or at least a good portion of it. Right now I'm cleaning up my food choices and trying to leave flour and sugar out of my choices....veggies, fruit and lean protein. I know what to do. I need motivation to stay with food choices and get moving on exercise. I keep asking myself if Cancer isn't enough to get me moving again, what is?

Meow13 · March 2015

ugh I am on my diet almost one week no loss yet. I need to see results in the first week or I give up. I will give it another week. I haven't been on treadmill everyday my legs are too sore.

Spookiesmom · April 2015

Honestly, I had forgotten about this thread. I did find an indoor pool, so no sunburn worries. The class times and days are perfect for me. Now to find a swim suit that isn't $100, and with no pockets for foobs. I WILL NOT spend that much on a suit, and I WONT wear foobs.

So I'm still sitting on my fat arse.

cowgal · April 2015

Sweethope - in the original post, you said that you did not realize until too late that you were reacting to sugar substitutes. I am curious. What do you mean by that?

movingsoccermom · May 2015

I also gained weight over time, thanks to menopause. Sigh. BC sure has not helped. My silver lining is Stage 1, only SNB, but so difficult to get started, especially after eliminating so many foods over the years. Severe allergies have me locked inside during the spring which doesn't help. Neither does the anti hormonal drugs. What a mess. You guys aren't alone! I will be working on my weight too, but plan to start after rads (beginning 20 May). Hang in there!

A fellow sufferer

tangandchris · May 2015

I forgot about this thread....so glad to see it pop up again.

I'm REALLY struggling with my weight, to the point of almost despair. I have put on more weight after tx ended, I'm up about 30lbs! How has this happened?? MO says Tamoxifen is to blame, but IDK anymore. I feel like crap...it's like a snowball effect for me, I look bad so I feel depressed and I eat. Then I feel like crap that I ate and it just goes round and round. I don't have the self control or whatever it takes to make a change and stick with it. I feel overwhelmed with trying to make changes and honestly I'm just tired after the year from cancer treatment hell.

ugg, I'm in full on whiney vent mode....do I need to just pull my big girl panties on and suck it up??

bleh

Sunshineinky · May 2015

I was diagnosed in March of 2014, finished treatment in July and had Bariatric surgery in November. I have gone from 290 in November to 229 today. My cancer is 100% estrogen positive, my liver enzymes were so high they were considering stopping my tamoxifen. My oncologist said the weight had to go and soon.

My oncologist now agrees that this little band in my stomach was probably the best thing I could have done for my treatment and me. I've had no vomiting, nothing stuck, I've just followed the rules and it's working.

At my last onc. visit my liver enzymes were closing in on normal. I was so happy!!! Bariatric surgery isn't for everyone, it's hard work. If it helps though, every struggle is worth it.

obsolete · May 2015

Sunshine, Congratulations! Yes, it is indeed worth it, so keep up the good work. You're beautiful, your progress is beautiful, and you've got the rest of your beautiful life to look forward. I'm also 100% ER+ with lifelong weight struggles, so I can relate personally. (I have under-active thyroid.) Hugs with encouragement to everybody on this thread.

KJSUN · May 2015

I just did a search with the word "obese" and found this topic, thank goodness! I could really use some support. I can relate to SweetHope regarding where I live. I am originally from Seattle WA, moved to FL in "89", I think, and slowly started the weight gain. I walked miles back home but the weather here in Florida is too much for me. I have several health conditions that make it difficult to walk outside. I was diagnosed 10+ years ago with Fibromyalgia, I also have an autoimmune disease called Sjogren's Syndrome and a Mast Cell disease. Chronic peripheral edema and chronic thrush make things even more complicated. I know I sound like I am about to fall apart but I was almost managing things, besides the weight, until my first BC diagnosis. I had 4 enlarged lymph nodes with BC cells, so stage 3. I ended up doing neoadjuvant chemo then axillary dissection, they took 17 lymph nodes, and last was radiation. They never could find a primary tumor. I went for my 6 month checks, On my second check, just over 1 year after my surgery, they found a mass in my right breast, same side as the lymph nodes. After biopsy they found triple- BC, my first BC was estrogen positive, so twice in 2 years. I have now had a bilateral mastectomy, 5 weeks ago, and will start chemo when they decide on the cocktail. After my second diagnosis I met with my BC surgeon and the PS. The PS won't touch me until I lose 100 pounds. My BMI is 49, I am 5'8" and weigh 310 lbs. I understand why, but I feel like I am not getting anywhere with the weight loss. I have an appt. with a dietitian and will talk about bariatric surgery. I know all the things to do regarding healthy eating but as we all know, easier said than done! I want reconstruction but can I do it? I just don't know. I hope I haven't dumped too much on you all. Thanks for listening.

staceymarieh32 · May 2015

Yes. 5'3" and 230 #. So I definitely need to find the motivation to lose weight. Yes cancer should be the major motivator, but it's not. I like food too much, lol. I bought a fitbit and that's helped me be a bit more active, but I stopped posting what I ate because it depressed me. Yes I need to make changes in my diet, but it's hard when you have a meat and potato loving boyfriend. Excuses, excuses.. Sigh.

it's nice to know I'm not alone....

SweetHope · May 2015

I just found out this thread is still active! I forgot to click the "Add to My Favorite Topics" button, so I did not see any more posts since the beginning of the year. I'm so sorry that I am not the only one kicking myself over this weight issue. I need to admit that I added 10 more pounds on chemo...UGH! That brings the total to 30 pounds since dx.

Cowgal, sorry I did not see your question. My reactions to artificial sweeteners were severe heart palpitations. So cardiologist first tried a heart pill, metaprolol, then Lexapro. Neither helped. Too bad I figured it out after gaining sooo much weight on Lexapro.

Sunshine, I am envious of your determination. Bariatric surgery is a difficult decision, and sticking to the program is quite an accomplishment. You rock!

KJSUN, we all worry about the dreaded reoccurrence, and I bet it took your breath away when you got that second diagnosis. Stay strong and "dump" here whenever you need to.

Spookiesmom · May 2015

Well, I never did find a swim suit that will work. And now the summer heat is here, I'm not going out to walk. And I'm still fat.

Sunshine inky, I used to go to Summerset quite a bit as a kid, my dad would summer his boat on Lake Cumberland. Pretty part of our world!!!!!

KJSUN · May 2015

Sunshineinky - I go tomorrow to talk with the dietician because with my insurance you have to do a year with them before bariatric surgery. I don't know if that is what I want but need to get all info available. I also am thinking about have food sensitivity testing because of bloating and I had one years ago and reacted to 21 out of 100 foods. I did follow a strict elimination diet and did it for 4 months so I know I can do it. I hope I will know more tomorrow. How was the your bariatric surgery? Recovery? Learning to adjust your eating? So many questions! Lol I am definitely a foodie so I might have a hard time with it. I can use any info you can share.

Spookiesmom - Boy, do I understand about not going to walk outside this time of year! It is already too hot now and it looks like we have a very hot summer in store for us. We live in a state that really limits our outdoor activity don't we? My Fibro and other conditions do not like the temp. extremes so I'm inside most of the year. I was never able to find a indoor pool, but did buy swim shirts for sun protection. When I went to an exercise class I was the youngest by at least 20 years. My part of the state just seems has a lot more seniors than other areas. Darn snowbirds! Oh well. Are you going to try any indoor exercise classes? I know that some places have yoga for BC survivors. I hope you can find something. Let me know if you find one that you like. I will do the same.

Sweethope - Thanks, it helps to share with others in the same boat. I will try to remember you all when I have the desire to go to Cheesecake Factory! If I'm lucky I will have nausea during chemo instead of being hungry like my first time! LOL

tangandchris - If you need to vent you are in the right place! We are so lucky to have this website and each other. I didn't know about this my first time with BC so I can really appreciate it during this time around. Big girl panties be damned!

justmaximom15 · May 2015

Good morning ladies! I'll be happy to jump in here and keep this thread active. I'm not so much fat as I'm just way too short for my weight. If I were about 6ft 4 like my SO then I'd be good but sadly I'm only 5ft 1 and that's on a good hair day so with chemo in the future I guess I better just be honest and say 5ft!

I was a skinny kid then not long after having my appendix removed when I was in 3rd grade, weight slowly crept on. I remember thinking I was the fattest girl in high school, LMAO at that now because I totally was not fat then, just maybe 10lbs overweight. I had my oldest when I was 18 and couldn't gain weight so after he was born I was smaller than ever. The really yucky weight didn't begin until my early 20's then each time I would try a plan to lose it, I would do good then it would all come back with another 10 or 20 lbs just for spite!

The best plan I've ever done is Atkins and I'm talking true Atkins not simply eating all the bacon and cheese you want. I'm definitely a carb addict so it's truly hard to stay away from the white stuff.

Here I am though, looking chemo in the eye and thinking is it awful that I hope this is what pushes me to lose weight? I know I that's not what I need to do during chemo but seriously if I just eat clean I'll lose weight.

Anyone Else Obese?

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