Starting Chemo March 2015

Eheinrich,

Ugh. That would make me so mad. What do these people think Cancer is? It is an invader. Chemo is my seal team 6 hunting the rogue operators. I had someone ask me if I was going to give up meat. Really? Eating a steak gave me cancer? Don't get me started.

Welcome Kazza! I hope you find this group to be of great help and support as it has been for me. Sorry we have to meet this way.

Carrie-Smooth sailing with the PICC install and first spa day. We are all behind you. You can do this.

E- how very disappointing for these questions/issues/doubts to come from a place where you had felt support and safety before. There is no accounting for these types of questions from these quarters especially. My own dear brother, when I was getting the pets, cts, Oncotype, etc., who had been previously (and since) nothing but supportive actually asked me if my doctor had ordered these tests, or if I had asked for them for my own piece of mind. (Because he knew, he and his wife knew, the next door neighbor knew, someone who had the same cancer, same grade, whatever, and, yet didn't remember hearing about any of these tests being run, or chemo even being a possibility. Or another personal favorite, totally not getting the implications of ten years of HT).

The day you get your cancer dx you are changed forever. In that instant, lines are drawn between who gets it and who does not. None of them will ever understand. This I understood well almost immediately. What I did not grasp so easily was that I have no idea how they feel either. I have no idea how hard it is for them to wrap their heads around what is happening to their loved one. What fear they feel about what their life will be like without me in it.

So I try to remember that this is the well from which springs most of the stupid and insensitive comments people that I KNOW love me make. It doesn't make it it right, but it helps it hurt a little less..

It does not apply to insensitive co-workers, a-holes, and other stupid hangers-on, who quite rightly, as Princess Karen says, must be bit*h slapped. Karen, I lol'd so loud when I read your post I woke my neice up who thought I was having a nightmare. Well, actually I am. But I never wake up.

3 people -- all of whom I consider dear friends -- baldly asked me if I knew what chemo would do to me. Like that's a secret? Really? I told 'em yes, I knew exactly what chemo would do to me: SAVE MY LIFE.

Molly - the port was definitely more painful than the lumpectomy. Sometimes I still use my boobie pillow while driving as the port lays right on the seatbelt line. On a good note I only feel the port while driving. If you are like me you'll have chemo shirts and non-chemo shirts. My chemo shirts make easy access to my port. The other shirts hide the damn thing.

Katy feel free to use my seal team 6. I'm all about visual imagery. The mind is very powerful. Not that you can "will" cancer away, but it helped me through my last round of chemo. Also...I have a thing for a man in uniform. Even little men in my bloodstream.

Diane: Don't forget we have a rule against apologizing for whining.

This all just reminded me that some chirpy person told me yesterday they don't need to use chemo anymore because Duke University is injecting people with polio virus and "it's killing the cancer! Isn't that great?"

Junk punch and bitch slap ordered. No asterisk

Princess, Ninja, Katy, Trvlr...all of you ladies - I read through...and I just appreciate your candor so much!!!

Speaking of "stupid" comments, I had someone tell me yesterday "Good thing you start chemo on April 2 instead of April 1, you know April fools day, because that would be weird..." Ummmm WHAT THE!?!! Who would joke about chemo!?!!! Is it just me, I was like...WTF!?!!!

Anyway...I did some research on resources and I though I would share them. It is a small list, but a list nonetheless. I hope it can be of use to you!

Chemo Angels – will send encouragement during the course of chemo

Lydia Project – Filled tote bags for chemo patients (it is only $10.00 for shipping, they are handmade and a note can be included)

Happy Chemo – A great site with lots of information. They have a Box O'Love which they will send out for 29.99 shipping filled with a quilt and other goodies for chemo patients.

Cleaning for a reason– Free cleaning nationwide for cancer patients.

Casting for Recovery - Free fly fishing retreats, nationwide for breast cancer patients

1 up on cancer - A comprehensive list by state and area of free resources and helps for cancer patients, including free hats, wig discounts, cleaning, mileage, ect…

I start chemo Thursday morning and I am clearly trying to keep myself busy until then! I have 4 kids (DD -18, DS -12, DS-10 and DD-8) and I have their Easter baskets done and ready; as well as the eggs for our annual family Easter egg hunt! I am hoping for as much normalcy as possible as we head into Easter weekend, trying to have everything in it's place as much as possible. To all of you in the chair this week, I wish you minimal SE's and a wonderful weekend!

Supernannymom,

I wish a good first treatment for you and a great week end. I do not start this for another month, but am not looking forward to it, but, am reading this thread to get familiarized with what I have to look forward to. I cannot imagine having to do this with 4 children! You are amazing.......everyone on here is. I was at the cancer center yesterday for my pre op for my surgery next week and talked to a woman who had just had her last chemo treatment. She also has 4 children. She looked really good. I asked her how she did it and she said, she just "plowed through it". So, if she can do it....you can too. Prayers going up for you.

Bek...had the same conversation...Hello...there really isn't a choice here!!!! Either have chemo or allow cancer to grow...Hmmmmm...ugh! I try to be kind and graceful but sometimes....

Mysunshine!

Thank you...we have explained this to our kids. They ask me things like "once you have chemo will all of the cancer be gone" and "mommy, I don't want you to have chemo" but we feel that we need to explain things to them, at their level, they need to understand why mommy isn't feeling well and why I need to go to the doctor so often.

As my DH reminds me, we are in this together as a family, and we will go through it together. When it's over - we will take a nice long Vacation together!!

rleepac, Priceless! Nobody wants chemo, I have eaten plenty of broccoli, I am a moderate drinker, and my mother is already in a nursing home. Guess I have nothing left to try so sign me up at the chemo bar. WTH?

I told my brother I finished the treatment plan, and would be going back to chemo soon, and he wanted to know why I would do that. Uh if I don't go I will die........thank you for the support. But he did say we may be able to get a two fer discount at the nursing home if I room with Mom, uh reload.

I get it, Bekah. I know at one point, after so many comments like that, I will let someone have it, too.

Karen: you are Godzilla. They are the gnomes. Just sayin'

a bit of dark garden art from my visiting neice

yeah,,, she gets it... I'll tell her she's invited.