Stressed out and feeling alone IDC er/pr+

Lmonelli, I responded earlier to your post. I had a bilateral mastectomy for a 1.7 cm lump (triple negative). My surgeon said I could do a lumpectomy and radiation and I think he was kind of shocked when I told him I wanted a bilateral mastectomy. 

I asked what he would recommend if it was his wife and he said, "She has already told me that if she is ever diagnosed, they are both coming off!" I'm sure they discuss breast cancer (since that's what he does all day, every day) and I'm sure she has heard just about every scenario imaginable. It at least made me think that maybe I wasn't crazy for making the decision that I did.

I have never regretted my decision, but you have to decide what is best for you. After doing your research and talking to your doctors, make your decision and stick to it. Don't let someone else talk you into something you are not comfortable with. It's a tough decision. Thankfully, I had made my decision years ago when my sister was diagnosed in 2008 (my mother was diagnosed in 1988). When I was diagnosed, I didn't even have to think about what I wanted to do.

I hope something comes along that makes your decision easier and you don't have any doubts.

Best wishes.

I had a double mx in dec 2014. I did a lot of research and asked my surgeon the same questions as the previous poster. My bs said he would try to help his wife make the rights decision for her.

The difficult thing I found is the research isn't currently showing that morbidity rates improve when you do the double. True, the cancer can come back, but because you are now monitored more closely, (mammos every six months, more MRI and biopsy at the first suspicious thing they see) they catch it early again and the morbidity rate is approximately the same. Some scientists and MDs claim to be astonished at drastically increasing levels of prophylactic doubles when cancer is diagnosed in only one breast.

To me, what is not taken into consideration enough is what living with one heavy breast can do to your neck and back for one thing. If you already have alignment problems this can turn into a nightmare. Even more compelling for me was the idea of living my life so full of the idea of cancer re-occurrence: always worrying about some "thing they are keeping an eye on", more uncomfortable/painful biopsies and sleepless nights waiting for test results. I knew that over time me that lifestyle would crush me.

So I did the double, as much for lifestyle reasons as scientific ones.

It did not save me from having to do chemo and 10 years of HT.

But I don't miss them. They tried to kill me. The biggest betrayed of my life.

i agree with Jackibird.

Had the option of perhaps doing a lumpectomy, but due to very dense tissue (mamo showed nothing), and the specter of neverending screenings and biopsy, I did a bmx. Also, my onco said it is what she personally would do. I'm Lucky to have my DH full support and am sorry you do not. Remember though it is YOUR decision, not your friend or DH. There are reasons to have a BMX, even if you can have other options.

Glad I did it too, as they had found other lumps and masses in the good breast! Only after path did it turn out benign, but it would have been biopsy city if not for BMX.

Best wishes

I can certainly relate to wanting the cancer out. I felt like I was holding my breath from dx to mastectomy.

Lmonelli, I was diagnosed in October of 2013. I had a lumpectomy. I did four rounds of chemo and 33 rounds of radiation. I was 45 years old. I now have a full head of hair and am feeling like my old self again. Having breast cancer changed my life. But I now know there are gifts too. Try to remember that this to shall pass. I'm taking depression medication. It seems to help. When were you diagnosed?

Take care, Lisa

IDC, Stage1C, Grade 3, No Nodes, ER Positive.