Diagnosed Dec. 24 and I'm not scared...

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Piscean
Piscean Member Posts: 50
edited February 2015 in Just Diagnosed

Hi lovely ladies,

I was diagnosed on December 24 having received a phone call from my doc. He initially stated that the cancer was low-grade "not really a cancer at all". Later, after referral to a surgical oncologist I learned that the cancer is high grade with comedonecrosis. I'm scheduled for a simple mastectomy, SNB and tissue expanders for reconstruction. I am not scared about cancer or treatment, more I'm pissed off that I won't be able to do the things I want to do this summer. Anyone else angry about cancer disrupting their lives?


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  • Beachbum1023
    Beachbum1023 Member Posts: 1,417
    edited February 2015

    Hi Piscean, I so get that! That was my entire summer last year. I live on the Lake, raft on the Lake, swim in the Lake, walk the beaches along the Lake, ah you get it. But I was grounded because of my port placement, chemo, sunburn issues, on and on. But I learned to do other things and get through it. Oh and I was working and running to appointment after appointment. But everyone here has been down this road, or the new normal they call it. Anger is part of this process, angry at the life changes, the illness, the financial hardships etc. We all go through it. There are many threads to read and learn from. But I also know that learning to move on and reinvent one's life is helpful and gets us through all of this. Or as my Social Worker tells me, will get me past this new phase of life to my chronic condition. Uh huh.

    So I pull up my cancer killing butt kicking boots, and move on. What are you planning for this summer? My list is long. But visit here often you will meet a very amazing, very creative group of the strongest women ever! BTW - one of my favorite trips ever was to Langley and Vancouver. Absolutely beautiful!

    Let us know what we can do to help!

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  • Kicks
    Kicks Member Posts: 4,131
    edited February 2015

    There was nothing I wanted to do the summer after surgery that I did not do. I am a very active 'outdoor' old woman (I turned 64 that June and am now 68). I ride (bicycles and horses), garden, now with my push mower (my yard and some other yards to help out others), fishing, etc.. I know it wasn't after surgery, but was after starting neoadjuvant Chemo, I drove my first Powder Puff Mud Bog and had a ball doing it and got 2nd (did better in that class than Son had done in his class).

    My Mod. Rad. Mast. had been in late Oct so did have time for it to heal before summer, however, during adjuvant Chemo I did develope LE and burned very bad after Rads with it being late June before the last scabs came off.

    Something 'funny' that I found out the last time I saw my Rads Dr - at least I thought it was funny. After the first time he had seen me, he called my PA to tell her to get me in to see a Pyscharitist as he thought I was in denial. She laughed at him according to him. He told me that last appt, that I had taught him a lot about how to really listen to what is actually said and not just what 'books' say.

    IBC does NOT define who/what I am. I do. That time and fighting it was only one bump in the road/journey called 'life'. The darkness/fog/clouds/coldness only make the beautiful Sunshine and warmth as we emerge back into it.

    Hope I've made some sense to anyone on my feelings/beliefs. M


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  • LilacBlue
    LilacBlue Member Posts: 1,636
    edited February 2015

    That is what cancer does best Piscean-disrupt our lives and those we love to the core. There are very few on this site who view cancer as a gift. It's a learning curve and anger as mentioned, is part of the process. It's a bumpy ride and no one wanted to have to take it. There are so many wonderful woman here at BCO (like BeachBum) to help you through this life passage and beyond - keep posting and all my best to you. LB,x

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  • Beachbum1023
    Beachbum1023 Member Posts: 1,417
    edited February 2015

    LilacBlue, thank you! We are all walking this road, and we never walk alone. Together we can pull each other through, one day, one step at a time. Thank you for showing us the way.......

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  • Piscean
    Piscean Member Posts: 50
    edited February 2015

    Hi Beachbum, Kicks and LB,

    Thanks for responding. This summer, I was hoping to be in my happy place, working as a sea kayak guide up in Haida Gwaii. I am active and fit and hope to bounce back quite quickly, but my boss says that he (understandably) cannot expect me to do the job effectively. He will hire someone else. I feel quite selfish wanting to do my thing, particularly since I have a dad, grandfather, uncle and aunt who are battling cancer right now. I feel selfish and angry that I feel that way. I think I'm in the right place with you all having experienced these feelings and offering helpful advice in dealing with this hand. Thank you.

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