Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?

Welcome Diane.  You will find a lot of support here.  As you can see, there are lots of opinions here based on our own experiences.  However, the most relevant information is what your pathology report contains, as our very wise Jackie has already pointed out.  Once you have that information, then you'll be ready to seek opinions on the options that are available to you and your very specific situation.  There are SO many factors that go into making the important decisions you face - type and nature of the cancer, location of the cancer, staging, grade, lymph node involvement or not, whether or not your type of cancer requires any genetic testing, and if so, the results of that testing.  All of these factors play into whether your team of doctors will recommend a LX or an MX.  As has been pointed out, then there are your personal feelings about it and only you can decide what makes you most comfortable. 

Sandra, what wonderful news your BCO friend has given you!  I feel that we all have our angels who are there for us at just the right moment, and she was surely the angel that delivered just the bit of information you needed at just the right time to put your mind at ease.  That you were in touch with her to begin with was no accident.  You "made" that happen with your generosity in offering her your support. 

I still pray for my two breast cancer angels every day, and I tell them they are my angels every time I see them.  I was diagnosed a little over a year ago and knew because of the aggressive nature of my cancer (triple negative) that I would be doing the heavy duty chemo & rads.  One friend had been through the exact same chemo 23 years prior, and the other one had been through the same chemo 12 years prior.  They both told me that they had no significant issues with the chemo.  They tolerated it all - chemo, followed by radiation-very well indeed.  I didn't want to think or read about anyone else's tough road with chemo.  I knew that there were two personal friends who had done well on this chemo, and so would I!!!  Their positivity gave me positivity. 

Blessings to all, especially you Blondie.  You are one tough cookie with a great spirit.

Paula

Hi Diane, glad you've joined the BEST support and BEST friends you could ever want. These women have been a constant source of good advice about all kinds of life challenges, silly discussions and cartoons, poignant messages, a little teasing here and there, fun posts with photos of things in our past, much talk about our families - good and bad, cooking, exercise or lack of it, gardening, travel, home renovation, and lots about our "fur babies." Sometimes we talk about cancer too. We have a variety of opinions on EVERYTHING and feel free to express them unless it's politics or religion...those are a no-no here.

I chose double mastectomy and have never been sorry. I was given my diagnosis on a Thursday afternoon and had to meet with the entire breast cancer team (one by one) on Monday morning. You can imagine how that weekend went. I chose several well respected websites - MD Anderson, Johns Hopkins, Cleveland Clinic, and Mayo Clinic - and started writing down the things they agreed upon and things they didn't. The things they agreed upon far outweighed the others. I put question marks in the margins to things I wanted to ask about or research further, erasing those marks when additional reading answered the question or made a situation clearer in my mind. By Monday I was ready. I knew that under no circumstances did I want radiation unless there was absolutely no choice. I have an aneurysm in the ascending aorta of my heart and an aortic valve that doesn't work right. Damage to the heart and other organs by radiation treatments is a fact and I wasn't willing to take a chance that it wouldn't make the situation worse. If I had a lumpectomy I would have to have radiation so that choice was out. I knew that while no one wants to lose a body part, my breasts had more than fulfilled their purpose and I would not be devastated to see them go. Although the tests showed cancer was only in one breast, I did not want to live the rest of my life worried about when or if the "other shoe would drop." It's a good thing I chose double mastectomy. The "good" breast was far from good and the pathology report showed it had another kind of cancer that had not been detected due to dense tissue - which no one had ever told me I had. I now know that this is unfortunately a common situation. Doctors in most states are now required to send patients with dense breast tissue a letter after they get a mammogram, telling them about the increased risk and advising additional testing. I have had no "buyers remorse" and know that while my choice was more aggressive than some other women would chose, for me it was right. The most important thing for you is to feel comfortable with your decision no matter what other women have done with your same diagnosis. Don't let doctors influence you to do something you aren't prepared for. They all have their personal preferences too.

Yes Sandra --- I had those and they were such great fun.  Actually, they didn't start out as mine.  My sister, 15 months older than me got them one yr. for her birthday.  She was not a well-co-ordinated person.  She couldn't skate, ride a bike well, use our hoola hoop, or really do much of anything that required balance for any length of time.  Since our family usually ( we were so close in age ) couldn't afford TWO of the same items --- I happily took over all the marvelous play-things of the slightly older child though I was actually the younger and mainly had them to myself. 

I did go on to spend many happy hours at our local Roller Rink -- usually the far end person when it came time to play crack the whip ( thankfully we didn't do it too often ) but could stay on the rink for hours at a stretch and keep the beat of the music bouncing easily and making perfect turns at the corners.  Hmmm, now, I'd imagine just looking at skates too long ( not even on my feet ) would likely be able to cause me possibly tipping over. 

Jackie  

I had those skates and wish they would come back. I don't feel confident trying roller blades, but wouldn't mind skating a little on sidewalks.

Bonnets, And jump rope. Don't forget jump rope. I think learning to run in when 2 people are turning a rope is where I learned to merge in traffic. Same kind of timing.

I am one who had a BMX...I have not regretted it one minute! One of my reasons was needing to think my chances of recurrence were lowered. I also had large breasts and felt that matching a prosthesis would be difficult. I didn't choose reconstruction because I didn't want to deal with extra surgeries/care and I'm 58 (almost 59) and wasn't worried about being flat.

My recovery hasn't been bad. I've had good range of motion from the beginning, pain hasn't been too bad, and I've healed well once my drains were removed.

I have been off work for 6 weeks and will be off one more, thinking the surgeon will at least release for that. I've had a few "issues", minor things, but nothing terrible.

All that to say that I don't regret my BMX a bit!

Vanmama - you are a beacon light for such positive thinking. My admiration and good wishes go with you.

Good morning to all.  Happy Lundi Gras.  Lundi being Monday.  I remember when there were no parades on Mon. before Fat Tuesday.  It was a day to take a breather from all the revelry.  But now there are parades on Monday.  Today is a warmish day with highs in the 70's but rain is coming tonight and with it cold windy weather.  Tomorrow--Mardi Gras day-- looks miserable.  Very windy and highs in the 40's.  I hope to be comfortable here in my house.  I may work on our income tax return.

Diane, my eyes popped at your bra size!  4 D?  I have already answered your question.  I am happy with my choice of BMX with immediate reconstruction.  I was never without "ladies."

I grew up in the country with dirt/gravel roads.  No sidewalks or paved streets.  So the only roller skating I did was at a rink.  I was not a good skater and didn't go often enough to ever get good at skating.  So that picture brings no nostalgia.  I see some young people, mostly young women, skating on the paved bike paths up in MN during the summer.  It looks like great exercise.

The YMCA where we exercise is closed tomorrow for Mardi Gras, so I will go this morning.  This afternoon I will probably deal with laundry and do some house cleaning. 

Morning all,

As to the question of double Mx.  Had I needed to do one side I would have asked to do the double.  I have not ever been overlg. but foolishly took hormones for the hot flashes -- the result, or so it seems to me in not so much size increase ( though there was some ) as the saggy, baggy droopy effect.  Had I been REALLY aware of that possibility -- I might have toughed it out.  Also, I don't know that the 'final' verdict was ever in since we and our responses are so individual, but I've always had some suspicion that taking hormones may have at some point encouraged cancer to begin.  Just guessing on my part and not meant to 'warn' anyone. 

So, I don't feel a huge attachment to needing breasts.  One of the biggest reasons I was ok with just a lumpectomy at the time I needed my surgery was due to the fact that I had a stroke a few yrs. previous to the cancer.  My tumors ( a second one was discovered  during surgery )  were on the much weaker side and I had concerns about disturbing the tendons, muscles and connective tissue.  Also, my surgeon did tell me that in fact, treatment is the same --- whether a breast (s) are removed or just a lumpectomy is done.  So, many Dr.'s now advise ( though they will do whatever you the patient want ) breast sparing lumpectomies because if you need chemo and or radiation or both -- it will generally happen. 

We did play a lot of hopscotch ( having all dirt sidewalks ) when younger.  Like Carole, where I grew up was in the main all dirt roads -- farther out of town there was gravel leading to most of the farms or other connecting roads to towns around us.  We did have one very long blacktop ( that was what we always called it too ) road.  This was done as it was the MAIN road all the way through town.  Everyone had a mail-box on that road and I think it was done mostly for the mail-man.  I had in so many ways an ideal childhood -- catching fireflies ( we called them lightning bugs ) and putting them in a jar.  Listening to toad frogs in the yard at night -- had to be careful going to the 'outhouse' or you'd step on them.  Picking wild berries in several little out of the way places around town -- learning to swim in the mind pond.  Had a foot or more of mud on the bottom and the water was ALWAYS muddy at the top.  My ears were good then and I could always here insects ( too loud sometimes ) buzzing -- and such joy to wake up to birds chirping.  There was such simplicity to being a carefree growing up kid then.  Some days if I get quiet I still can find some of those joys.

Snow that started just about dark last night is falling still this a.m.  Not deep and it is not frozen so moves away well with the snow shovel.  We obviously are not getting through this winter without at least one 'deeper' snow -- though again, nothing remotely close to what so many others have gotten to the East coast areas.  It is pretty out here in the country and something ( as long as it doesn't get too deep ) that can be enjoyed.  I looked out my bedroom window when I first got up and saw where several deer had camped out for a rest on a flat spot in the big ravine next to the house.  They looked comfy actually ---  a really beautiful animal to watch when they are not disturbed by anything.

Hope you are all going to have a really good day. 

Blessings

Jackie

is there a board on here for Long Island and NYC ladies?

I too remember the skating,kick ball, riding bikes,lightning bugs and just spreading a blanket to play barbies. Life and memories are awsome. Sandra trust in your doctor and you will do great. I know it is hard but you will grow as a woman and this to will be a positive memory. Find laughter! Shuf

Diane, This forum about bras and prostheses was started by a woman with very large breasts who had a bmx for medical reasons. She has some photos of before and after that you might find interesting.

https://community.breastcancer.org/forum/82/topic/...

Diane - I too chose mastectomy. I had DCIS on one side and dense tissue on the other side, which had been on the "watch list" for several years. My cardiologist did not think radiation was a good option and I agreed. My husband and I agreed that removing the side that was still considered somewhat healthy was best. I had DIEP reconstruction because implants weren't going to be a good idea with my pacemaker. I have not regretted my choice. I did not have any healing issues. Whatever choices out make, will be right for you.

This is the "loot" dh and I collected at the Endymion parade on Sat. night. 

The flambeau carriers of today carry "torches" fueled by bottled butane gas.  They carry the bottles strapped to their backs.