October 2014 Surgery Sisters

Revelle, you don't need to apologize, nor do you need to censor yourself. I'm angry about having it but if I were dealing with it a second time? I think I'd be fairly bitter as well as scared, angry and disappointed.

There's a lot of pressure on us to go through this gracefully, to be strong, to keep a sense of humor, blah, blah, blah. It's great if that's the way one REALLY feels but I see no reason we should lie either to ourselves or others about how hard and discouraging and frightening and depressing this diagnosis is.

I'm glad you are one of us. Stop in often - especially when you need a virtual hug or some TLC or understanding. We are all in this together. (((Revelle)))

Thanks to everyone for being here. I have been impressed how all of my doctors have called to see how I am doing after the news of BRCA2. And so surprised b/c I didn't fit the mold. How many other women were not tested with no family history and could have avoided many heartaches. Well, I have faced the reality of a mastecomy on the left side, but first the ovaries, tube, and hysterectomy. I would rather do the exchange surgery first and get rid of this very uncomfortable TE, but I don't know what is lurking in the ovaries and know the breast is fine for now. So let's get rid of the unknown and let my skin heal from the radiation that much longer. Tomorrow is my last radiation finally!!! I drove in Boston's foot of snow to get there today so it would not be delayed another day!!!

Four-Doesn't it seem to hurt more when you think its hurting someone else? I have to say, I think kids are much more accepting than adults. With my hair loss and switching from the wig to my own growing hair, the students were frank about what had happened-they did not know I had a wig- and when I explained I had previously had chemo for breast cancer and was alright now and my hair was coming back, they were fine and supportive. Maybe once you have your foob, you'll feel more comfortable leaving the door unlocked.

Hi Ladies, thank you for your kind words and support, you can't put words to what that means. Because I feel connected to all of you I am going to share some personal thoughts with you. I went to work as you know last Monday. I went through my closet looking for what I could wear. I put away all my bras before surgery so now it was time to look at my clothes . I was so anxious about going to work flat, I tried tops on, I still looked flat. I couldn't put any pressure on my chest, so no help there. The day I went to work, got out of my car, in pain, nervous about how things would go and dealing with seeing my shoes, what can I say. I went in and took it moment by moment with thankfully kind people. I went to the grocery store pulling my sweater in front of me, at one point I saw someone looking at my front, I thought they noticed, no the problem was my shirt buttons  were under my arm pit, oh another problem how to I keep them in the middle now? I guess that why I was so irriatated in my last post. The pain is getting better, the people at work are relaxing. What I say to myself is this, I am more than my body, who I am holds no form. I will be remembered by people for what they thought of me not what I looked like. That doesn't make this any easier but does give me hope that I can reach a higher ground with my daughter, grandsons, people I work with and myself. My chest looks like Picaso would love to paint my chest, but I love my daughter, grandsons, enjoy the people I work with and find great solice in being part of this group so thats enough for now, maybe greater things will come. We don't know whats ahead and that's the deal, it could be great, here's to great ladies. 

Revelle

 

 

 

 

congratulations Horsemom! That's awesome, I'm so happy everything went smoothly for you. Hard to imagine what you've been through the last few month, isn't it? I hope you can celebrate! I hope my trip down reconstruction road goes as well as yours did.

Take care!

i'm still doing okay after my exchange. But I have to say, the donor site (abdomen)where they took fat for the grafting In the upper pole of implant is really painful. I think it hurts more than the extended incisions under my armpits.

I hope this lets up soon, PS says not to use my arms but I can't use my core either. Ouch.

And in my left foob I have a little bit of fluid and gas and it sounds like a frog when I move my arm! I've been assured that this will be absorbed but in the meantime my 13 yr old twins can't stop laughing.

Horsemom, unfortunately that donor site pain is going to be with you for another month. It won't be quite as intense next week but will still hurt a lot. The first week I (who never curses) was shouting "chit, chit, chit" every time I had to stand up. The second week it was still pretty painful but I traded my loud cursing for a quick intake of breath when I stood. It got better in week three. I'm 7 weeks out and still have one spot that is sore on my belly. Some people apparently have little pain with fat grafting. Good for them. I thought it was more difficult than the mastectomy.

Fourminor, damn, I'm sorry you are having such a bad time of it. It's especially difficult when everybody tells you it's going to be so easy. My first thought was that something had gone wrong because it wasn't what I expected. I was scared! The only good thing is that tomorrow will be better than today and the day after that will be even better. It WILL be ok before long.

Hi Sandra, yes, worse, and now i have constipation from all the opiods. Took colace and fibre for two days, last night added a senekot, something better move here, this is not my typical problem. Did not have this before either.

When my husband changed my dressing yesterday he looked at the new IMF and was like, "OK I see why you are in so much pain."

All I can say is I'm ready to be done now.

Aw don't be scared Hummingbird. I managed to cut back on painkillers today to one every six hours from one (or two) ever four. I have post op check on Thursday, been laying real low hoping the drain output will drop enough to get it pulled by then. And the preliminary look i had of my new boob is very encouraging. As they say, beauty suffers. I'll be glad to put this all behind me.

Rev-up - I am so very sorry to hear your news!!! I have to say that chemo has been very difficult for me - not the nausea or the hair loss, but just the fact that I cannot control how I am feeling and cannot be my usual energetic self. If there is one thing I am learning...is to let go and allow family to help and not feel guilty. It has become my daily mantra and I am slowly getting more comfortable just being a 'log' if I need to be. Please be kind to yourself and take things one day at a time.

Do you know what treatment regimen you will be getting? I am on cytoxan, taxotere and herceptin.

At any rate, please know that we are here for you - cheering you on! You can do this...you are strong and a fighter. Hang in there and please feel free to vent any day at any time!

R.

Depends on the PS, but many/most women have drains. I got a call today and she confirmed that he took a lot of scar tissue out and put a lot of sutures in to create the inferior mammary fold and she was not at all surprised by my discomfort under the implant and the fact that the drain has been putting out a fair amount of fluid.

The bit of a look I've gotten from the top though made me happy because I don't see skin over ribs anymore over my upper chest. The upper part of the implant is covering that now and it looks pretty good. Hopefully i will have no problem wearing summer clothing and bathing suits and in time won't think about it much. It feels pretty firm and although I know that will get a little better, I went with the form stable silicone because I was willing to trade softness for shape and lack of rippling so I am not going to obsess over that either. It was never going to be the same as the breast I lost.

I too have started to let things go around the house, tolerating some clutter, and making my focus me right now. I need to heal well and that's my priority.

I had a bilateral US on Monday to assess my status after another 3 months on Femara - probably the last one before surgery this spring and want to post the results for any of you who are interested.

The report shows no previously unknown areas of concern - whew! (I was actually concerned something might have cropped up.)

The node and the tumor have both shrunk an additional 50% since November, at which point both were 50% smaller than at dx. Thus, the tumor is down to 4mm and the node is 3mm (described as "very small"). Both my MO and my surgeon's PA are very pleased with the results. I'm still crossing my fingers for PCR (at least in the node) which, of course, we won't know until after surgery.

Still, I think these results are pretty impressive and I'm sharing them in hope of demonstrating the potential power of neoadjuvant A/I therapy. Keep this in mind when you meet other ER+ women and feel free to suggest that they PM me. This approach isn't for everyone, and it's not all peaches and cream but it has much to recommend it, both in the short and long term.

I am very eager for next week's appt. with my BS!

Thank you, Hummingbirdlover!

I think it's truly fascinating to watch Femara's action on my system this way and I'm really, truly intrigued by the implications for others. It's SO much more humane than chemotherapy and probably at least as efficacious, for the right population, if not more so.

And as you remarked, it's incredibly encouraging to see how powerful endocrine therapy can be. I feel very, very fortunate to be able to see its efficacy directly, first hand. If anything has given me hope through this process, it is the knowledge that Femara IS working. At this point, it could turn me into a 3-eyed, green alien and I'd still be happy with it!

Thank you for your support.

Hopeful, we're all thrilled by your news!

Hopeful, Mike started chemo this week and in spite of the fact that up to 90% of people on his particular kind of chemo have nausea & vomiting, he has had none. They are also giving him steroids and that has improved his appetite so much that he's actually gained a pound in four days. The bone marrow transplant is still two months off, we think. I'm exhausted but having Allison here to trade off duties with has helped. We have a long hard road ahead.

Glad you are doing so well on AI's. Just like everything else, the people with no problems rarely post about it. Only those with problems do, it seems. People who don't know any better are led to believe the worst happens to everybody.

 

Hopeful8201…I really felt good after reading how well you are doing. I start my doctors rounds next week. Chemo coach on Tuesday, Cat scan on Friday, and need to make an appointment for the port. They want to start Chemo a week from Monday but I have to check out the side effects more, I may need to make it closer to weekend so I can deal with them if they happen. Going to try and work while I am doing chemo. The good news is we seem to be going in the right direction with a plan, that's a positive thing. You will all be in my thoughts, sending out positive energy. My OD had some interesting things to say will share that later when I get it put all togeathe.