Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?

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  • Wren44
    Wren44 Member Posts: 8,585
    edited February 2015

    (((((Teacher))))) Yes, very hard for you but compassionate for Penny.

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  • IllinoisLady
    IllinoisLady Member Posts: 29,082
    edited February 2015

    For Teacher


     
    If it should be that I grow frail and weak
    And pain should keep me from my sleep
    Then will you do what must be done
    For this—the last battle—can't be won.

    You will be sad, I understand
    But don't let grief then stay your hand
    For on this day, more than all the rest
    Your love and friendship must stand the test.

    We've had so many happy years
    What is to come can hold no fears
    You'd not want me to suffer, so
    When the time comes, please let me go.

    Take me to where my needs they'll tend
    Only, stay with me until the end.
    And hold me firm and speak to me
    Until my eyes no longer see.

    I know in time that you will see
    It is a kindness you do to me
    Although my tail, its last has waved
    From pain and suffering I've been saved.

    Don't grieve that it must now be you
    Who has to decide this thing to do
    We've been so close—we two—these years
    Don't let your heart hold any tears.

    Julia Napier

     

    I was so sorry to hear that Penny needed to go to the Rainbow Bridge today.  I am entirely convinced that someone who has been so close to us in our life here, will be just as close when we transition to our eternity.  On days like this if there are any bright spots, and there probably are not, I do feel that our animals are not only stoic, but very accepting when it is time for them to take their leave-taking.  They are so guileless, so loving, and so nearly perfect, that we feel bad -- but like us when we have gotten to a certain part of our ending -- being able to let go is just a transition to them into what is next. 

    In this transition, perfect health is returned with all the energy there ever was and life is once again full of peace and joy.  They do not count their life in years -- only we do that.  If they can please us ( their only and highest goal in life ) then time does not matter to them.  One of the quotes I read mentioned that God knew what he was doing when he gave our four legged companions shorter lives.  Just think of how bad we feel when we have to part at 10 or 14 yrs.  How much harder would it be if it was 2o or more years. 

    So, we grieve -- but at some time we will be able to feel peace again. 

    Blessings

    Jackie

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  • bonnets
    bonnets Member Posts: 769
    edited February 2015

    Teacher, It is so painful to loose our pets. Be it a doggie or a kitty , they are definitely a part of our family and we love them. Cherish your memories. Hugs, Jean

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  • Chevyboy
    Chevyboy Member Posts: 10,786
    edited February 2015

    Mommarch.... Hope things get settled before, but in case you have to go, make sure you have all of your information, time-line, and pictures all with you.... I had to go one time, because this jerk was supposed to be "fixing up" things in my Grandma's house.... I paid him $900 of her money, before he started, because he said he needed it for the repairs.

    Instead of replacing some shingles on the roof, he got up on a ladder and spray painted the holes that the hail damage left! I know, because I got up on a ladder and saw for myself! I took pictures...

    THEN he bought window glass replacements for the broken windows, but didn't seal them in.... Also tore the piece of Linoleum he put in the kitchen, and when I went over one day to talk to him, he was sitting in the rocker watching TV and eating a sandwich! Which was FINE, but this little odds & ends job had gone on for 2 weeks, and he just screwed everything up!

    So I went back with my Husband and told him he was finished... To take his little tool box and not come back.

    Took him to court... I "presented my case" shaking like a leaf.... I said " I would PAY for the materials he had bought... but didn't want to pay for the shoddy work that he did. "

    He talked to the court first... told them he repaired the roof, put new linoleum in the kitchen, replaced the windows...blah blah... Then I showed the judge the pictures of how he DID those things.... The judge asked him " You PAINTED the roof??? " Hah!

    I had to hire another guy who "fixed" everything, but the judge found in my favor, and I, meaning my Grandma was out nothing extra...And we got the work done right.

    Teacher..... (((( hugs)))) I'm so sorry for you.... about Penny............... I know....... It's been a little over a year, and I still miss our girl Lacee....

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  • Chevyboy
    Chevyboy Member Posts: 10,786
    edited February 2015

    Our little "snow-dog"....


    image

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  • camillegal
    camillegal Member Posts: 16,882
    edited February 2015

    Teacher I'm so sorry, when I read his I felt so bad, we all love our furbabies and when we have to loose them it's so sad, they are part of our family.

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  • mommarch
    mommarch Member Posts: 584
    edited February 2015

    Good Morning,

    Yesterday DH went to broom shop and came home about 1:30. He had a sneezing fit as he was entering the main road to our subdivision and hit the gas pedal instead of the break and ran into the stone sign at the entrance. Our 2012 Ford Fiesta, only good car we had is now not driveable . We have an old 1986 Ford Tempo which does run but sometimes gets hot. If life gets any better I don't know what I will do. Trying to keep my chin up.



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  • IllinoisLady
    IllinoisLady Member Posts: 29,082
    edited February 2015

    How far you go in
    life depends on your being tender with the young,
    compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving
    and tolerant of the weak and the strong.
    Because someday in life you will have been all of these.

    - George Washington Carver

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  • IllinoisLady
    IllinoisLady Member Posts: 29,082
    edited February 2015

    Mommarch, just as the above quote says -- we all need to be sympathetic with the striving --- and I for one think you have had to STRIVE so much and it seems rather endless.  Thinking here too of Mother Theresa.  She said there were times that she wished God didn't trust her so much -- with all the things he gave her to do.  Now, in some ways maybe I am being a little un-fair -- insinuating that we are given what we can handle.  In reality, I actually do believe that -- I just haven't answered the question of why so much of it comes, it would seem almost unrelentely ( sp ? ), before you have barely had time to catch your breath.   

    I'm sure it means almost nothing when you go for such long periods without a "break "  but I also feel that when we "handle" things, others around us, either now or later, will be inspired to give that extra little nudge when they are close to despair -- because they will recall that YOU kept going through it all.  We are here to not only lean on each other, aide each other, but to LEARN some of the better aspects of each other -- like perseverance through trials.  Even though it is if at all, right at the moment, very small comfort to you Mommarch --- someone I think will revere the courage and determination you display in life.  I just wish I had more care and comfort that I could send. 

    There is sunshine out my window today and there will be warm temps.  It was nice outside when we did our chores.  I could really like it, but it will move away and some colder temps will return -- it is still winter with one of those little tempting lulls that make you DREAM of the coming Spring. 

    Spring is a big favorite of mine -- and along with the renewal of leaf covered trees and grass and warmth comes my feeling of using energies to renew myself -- I want to try and enhance the things about myself which I think are good things.  Seeing and feeling the positive bloom of returning health and life after the winter inspires me in endless ways to make me wish to improve and enhance what I can about myself --- as if grass and trees can do it, surely it is something I should be doing too.

    Chevy -- I have always loved the picture of your snow dog, little Lacee.  I always think -- they may have to go, but the pure love they brought is allowed to remain with us.  They are so ok with moving on -- because they FEEL with their souls while we feel with our emotions.  No wonder it is often so painful for us. 

    Thinking of the many who are having trials -- some for Cammie, Momarch, Sandra, Mike and Blondie and Carole with her feet.  Wish I could give you all five minutes of total peace to renew and re--charge you.  Just five minutes to sit in the sun and get completely in touch with your spirit.  It so helps to let go of all that seems to hold you back -- even for a brief time -- we are our own renewable energy source.

    Blessings

    Jackie


     

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  • Puffin2014
    Puffin2014 Member Posts: 961
    edited February 2015

    Carol: I went to a talk about acupuncture that was sponsored by our cancer center. We have a doctor within the system that does acupuncture and she said it's covered by insurance. So look around, you might find someone in your area that's covered.

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  • Teacher64
    Teacher64 Member Posts: 840
    edited February 2015

    Jackie, thanks for the perfect poem

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  • carolehalston
    carolehalston Member Posts: 6,887
    edited February 2015

    Puffin, thanks for that information. 

    Mommarch, you do have more than your share of trials.  Somehow you deal with things and keep going.  Sympathetic vibes sent in your direction. 

    My sister lost two dogs the last six weeks or so.  She and her dh run their own personal rescue shelter, taking in all kinds of animals who need a home, some of them having been abused.  She gets attached to all of them.  They have four horses and goodness knows how many dogs and cats.   Heaven should have a special place for people like my sister and Jackie. 

    The weather couldn't have been nicer today.  Partly sunny and 70's.  I was too warm in my jeans and would have been more comfortable in shorts.  But we probably have some more cold weather ahead, too. 

    Hi to everyone.

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  • IllinoisLady
    IllinoisLady Member Posts: 29,082
    edited February 2015

    In your days - things like this happen to you...
    You get a tap, a nudge, a gentle shake,
    and life whispers to you, "I know you're tired -
    but I don't want you to miss this."
    - Mary Anne Radmacher

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  • IllinoisLady
    IllinoisLady Member Posts: 29,082
    edited February 2015

    Gloomy here this morning as we pretty much knew it would be.  Maybe even some snow flurries.  The wonderful warm 60 degree weather of the past three or four days and moved onto some other area.  Sigh !!!  I do think it will warm again, but not sure how much.  We will get by. 

    I hope you are all feeling ok.  I'm always surprised when I come and no one has been here for a bit -- at least in the morning.

    Blessings to all,

    Jackie

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  • bonnets
    bonnets Member Posts: 769
    edited February 2015

    Just sitting here watching it snow! More forecast for Thursday!

    Not much happening here. DH supposed to have his tooth pulled tomorrow. Had cardio write him a note after his BP was 214, when he was supposed to get it pulled last week. I have blood work on Friday. Hopefully we will be dug out by then! Got a stress test on the 23rd, think it is the medication one. Never had that before, usually walk the treadmill. Hear a lot of people don't like the meds one!

    Tons of birds here. Now that we aren't feeding a kitty , we are really in the bird feeding business. ONly trouble is it also brings woodpeckers, who like to eat on our log home. They can do a lot of damage!

    Have a good day, stay warm. Hugs, Jean

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  • MagicalBean
    MagicalBean Member Posts: 362
    edited February 2015

    We're coated in a thin layer of ice. I'm glad I don't have anywhere to go today.

    My sister and I are planning a road trip to Colorado in late July. We're meeting up with 3 of our cousins for a week of fun and memories. I need to be drugged and drunk to get on a plane, so we're looking at driving. Now we just have to make arrangements for 6 dogs and 6 cats. This should be fun.

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  • ritajean
    ritajean Member Posts: 4,223
    edited February 2015

    Oh teacher, I am so sorry to hear about your Penny. Our fur balls become part of the family and it's so hard to lose them. Hugs to you!

    We are getting a few sprinkles here today but the sun is starting to poke through again. I hope t clears up as I have ben very diligent about riding my bicycle and about walking.....and I must admit that it makes me feel so much better.

    I have some crockpot chili cooking for dinner tonight and have the rest of the day to enjoy! My first enjoyable stop was this site!

    I hope everyone is having a great Monday.

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  • Anneb1149
    Anneb1149 Member Posts: 960
    edited February 2015

    I am back to Fl. Got home about 9:30 last night and was in bed by 10:10. It was a long day, made longer by the fact that I was traveling with a friend. Her daughter lives an hour away from Nancy, and they hadn't seen each other in forever, so we went over to them for lunch, and sat and visited for more than 3 hours before we left for the airport, which was almost another hours drive, then finally the flight. Thankfully, we are only a half hour at most from the airport here and my friends husband picked us up. All in all, it was just a very long day.

    I am picking my 2 DGCfrom school today, but Tim, who moved to his own place with his fiancée the same week I went to Ga, asked me to have lunch with him today, but said he would call when he woke up- it's 11:48 and I haven't heard from him. Unless he calls soon, we won't have enough time, and tomorrow someone is coming to finish up some stuff around the house, then Tim works Wed, so if I don't see him today, it will be Thurs before I have another chance,

    Nancy and I were just talking about how strange my life is- she said she doesn't know what"normal" is any more. Is it "Ok grandma's gone, we can get back to normal", or is it " Ok, grandma's here, we can get back to normal" and I said I hate leaving them, the only thing I hate as much is leaving here. I am trying to be grateful that I have the financial ability and health to go back and forth as much as I do. Problem is, I have no "permanent " base or home- I go back and forth constantly, fitting in one week trips to my son in So. Caroline each time I am in Ga. For someone who has lived in the same house since 1978, that's a bit unsettling, especially since I gave up the master bedroom here, which surprisingly, re-orients everything.

    Sorry for complaining over such a trivial matter, but just needed to get my emotions on paper. It really helps me see things a little clearer

    Prayers and hugs to Sandra, Mike, Blondie, Carole, Mommarch and Cammi. Hello and hugs to everyone else.

    Anne

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  • MomMom
    MomMom Member Posts: 523
    edited February 2015


    Jim and I just returned from a 10 day road trip "down South" and have been reading here, but no time to post.  It was a rejuvenating trip that offered visits with Jim's aunt and uncle in GA, an old friend in Wilmington, NC, a day at Disney Hollywood Studios with two oldest granddaughters, daughter and SIL, and first time visits to Naples, FL & Savannah, GA.  It was a celebration of being one year (January 9) past my bc diagnosis.  We loved every minute of it, and rejoiced in the lovely, warm weather we were having everywhere we went (at least warmer than home), the joy of being with family and friends, and exploring two charming cities.

    You have all been in my thoughts and prayers Sandra, Mike, Blondie, Cammi, and now Teacher (you also Anne & Carole).  So very sad to say good-bye to our beloved pets.  We are seriously considering getting another dog after the loss of our Sandy cocker-golden mix almost 4 years ago.  They just bring so much joy and love into our lives. 

    Blessings to all.

    Paula

     

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  • mommarch
    mommarch Member Posts: 584
    edited February 2015

    It gets better yet. DH & DGD worked on the old 86 Tempo and we took her to school this morning and

    we had some errands to run, well on the way back from Alpine it caught on fire. A nice person picked us up and took us to Fort Davis. then one of neighbors came to town and brought us home.

    We are stuck on the Mt. with no transportation, maybe I can laso a donkey.

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  • blondiex46
    blondiex46 Member Posts: 5,712
    edited February 2015

    teacher so sorry about   Penny...hugs

    mommarch wow, that really is horrible, what are you going to do with the cars. fire, boys  is goes from bad to worse.

    mom thanks

    thanks for all the prayers and thoughts

    Sandra and Mike thinking of you

    am still in the nursing home, still non weight bearing, am bored thank goodness for pain meds, don't know how the food is cause I can't smell or taste think I might order out tonight don't like dinner or the alternative...am not in a private room anymore which sucks.....sharing a room with just 1 person tho.

    kids are coming to see me, all have and so has friends, bored. they have already stolen things drank some choc mill i placed in the nurses frig...and deoderant from my bathroom, the vice administrator just came she started 3 days ago, gave her an ear full, they hate me cause I am vocal...what about all that around, the advocate in me is at full strength or other people have to do it for myself.  surgeon tomorrow we will see no discharge date as of yet, it is a month tomorrow since I fell.....wth.

    HOW IS EVERYONE????

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  • Chevyboy
    Chevyboy Member Posts: 10,786
    edited February 2015

    Mommarch! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT! You are getting into too much trouble! I just don't know what I would do! I don't think my DH would handle all of that as well as YOUR Husband does!

    I'll bet you are thinking, "Well it COULD be worse"...... Nope! I think you have covered it all..... Sorry about that....xoxoxo

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  • IllinoisLady
    IllinoisLady Member Posts: 29,082
    edited February 2015

    I hope you are hearing my sigh's where you are because they are so loud.  For you Blondie and for Mommarch.  Mommarch that is hard to take in -- that you have no vehicles at all at the moment.  You do have a sense of humor about the securing a donkey for yourself, but my heavens.  When it rains it really rains on you but conversely I hope when things start coming together they do so in a wonderfully big way.  I can't think of anyone who deserves it more. 

    Blondie, if I were there I'd give the Administrator a chunk of my mind as well.  You have so little control about where you are and little privacy -- sometimes even if you are the only room occupant.  No one should have to hire a guard so that what little you have is not taken by others.  It is difficult I know to be there and than to have to deal with those sorts of un-called for losses.  It is not that they are necessarily expensive things -- but just the fact they were yours -- all that means something to you. Something to make your life where you are as tolerable as you can make it.  I'd be pissed too.

    I'm sure hoping these latest events can start to in some way bear much better fruit.  Just have fingers and everything else crossed and lots of prayers and positive energy flows from the Universe.

    Jackie


     

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  • ritajean
    ritajean Member Posts: 4,223
    edited February 2015

    Oh mommarch.............WOW! You've had your share of challenges lately. Hugs!

    Anne...vent all you want here. I understand how hard it would be to go between places and not really feel like you have a true home of your own. We all need a home base and my home is so important to me. Your situation would drive me crazy, although I would like to see my grandsons more that I get to see them now. At least the contact with your family is a plus for you. You seem like a very strong person so I'm sure you will figure out what you need and will be able to adjust to what works best. Ssometimes, time is just the best answer to a problem. Hugs to you also.

    Blondie...sending healing vibes your way. I am so sorry that you've had problems with thievery in the nursing home. That's terrible. I'm glad that you're getting some company as that will help the time go better while you heal. Check in here when you get bored! We'll keep you company.

    Nice to hear from you MomMom and so glad that you had a nice vacation!

    Well, I'm headed for the recliner and my book. Catch you all tomorrow.

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  • mommarch
    mommarch Member Posts: 584
    edited February 2015

    Yes Chevy it could be worse, we were not hurt and we were all together tonight for dinner. We just have

    to count our blessings.

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  • mommarch
    mommarch Member Posts: 584
    edited February 2015

    Our neighbor has two ford trucks, one is wrecked and the other is drive able but needs some repairs. He is selling both to us for $300.00. A friend who is a mechanic will take what parts he needs off of wrecked vehicle and then take the wrecked vehicle for his payment and tow it away and part it out.

    Adjuster is to look at Fiesta tomorrow, make sure it is not totaled. They will cut us a check and we will

    fix ourselves. God is good

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  • Chevyboy
    Chevyboy Member Posts: 10,786
    edited February 2015

    I just KNEW you would say this Mommarch! It' s like no matter how bad things get, you know in your heart, they could always get worse.... And you really appreciate when little things help it all "turn around."

    Same thing when I was laying there in the alley, and couldn't get UP! I thought later, well at least I didn't get run over..... And thank GOD that the neighbor just happened to come buy, and had that wheel-chair in his trunk! And it was a WONder that I didn't pull my Husbands jeans off, when we were trying to get myself UP...

    And this stupid neighbor looking at us about 4 houses away! What did he think? That I was sprawled out on all 4's for some good reason? When you break your femur, there ain't no putting any weight on it... So it COULD have been worse.

    But it's been 3 days short of 1 year.... and it has healed pretty good I think! I mean considering I am NOT in my 20's! I don't use a cane, unless we are walking around the Mills.

    I just bought some "heel lifts"....! And they really make a difference. I think that leg just got shorter... So I can fix that....

    Sandra, how IS everything? And you Anne? It's just like we NEED to feel like we "belong" somewhere.... We need a "base"..... Normal will not be the same tomorrow, as it was last week.... That is always changing.... and look at Mommarch.... I mean she like lives in a place where Life keeps throwing monkey wrenches at them!

    image

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  • IllinoisLady
    IllinoisLady Member Posts: 29,082
    edited February 2015

    The higher goal of spiritual

    living is not to amass a

    wealth of information, but

    to face sacred moments.

    Abraham Heschel

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  • IllinoisLady
    IllinoisLady Member Posts: 29,082
    edited February 2015

    What a nice place to be this morning.  While all of us were there once -- young and likely not willing to use time the same way some of we older gals do --- the one thing I can count on when I come here is all of you.  There is nothing like sharing your life -- good and bad, with people who you have come to know and they have come to know you. 

    I am grateful that I do not have many ups and downs and most of the time just go along, getting along.  I don't really even go too many places and not for long when I do as my little kitties wait daily for me to show up.  They are a huge source of joy and contentment for me.  When I think they are happy --- by default, I am happier.  And life just continues to go -- most of the time on an even keel.  I am blessed with few complaints -- directly or most of the time even indirectly. 

    Learned this year that it is the last year that we have to file income taxes.  Well, that was good news.  Lady said we would have to earn at least $15,000.00 more to qualify for paying income taxes.  Sssh, I think that means we are a bit on the thin side monetarily but you couldn't prove it by me.   I was a little shocked , but sort of glad too -- to be relieved of a yearly burden.  Have to admit in the pre-Obama yrs. it was scary --- since we seldom got more than a few dollars back -- that changed with a Democratic president so we got to not dreading it -- just surprised to reach this point where we don't have to do it at all.

    Yes -- no matter what for us -- quitting is not an option.  Whatever changes or rearranges itself --  we adapt because we stay flexible and open to possibilities.  Here's to never, ever, quitting before its time.  See you all later -- going to work now.

    Blessings,

    Jackie


     

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  • carolehalston
    carolehalston Member Posts: 6,887
    edited February 2015

    Jackie, you have a great attitude toward life.  I love that you enjoy your life and do so much good.  I thought everyone had to file income tax whether or not tax is due.  Guess I'm wrong again! 

    I have my Turbo Tax program in the office and a pile of forms has stacked up.  So I can do our return as soon as I get around to it.  Aside from social security and dh's small pension, our income is retirement money that we saved tax free.  As we spend it, we have to pay the taxes.  I guess that's as it should be. 

    I took my car to a body shop today to get an estimate on repairing some minor damage to the righthand rear fender.  Some months ago dh backed the car into a pole in a parking lot.  There's a round dent about 3 in. in diameter and the plastic cover on the backup light is cracked.  The estimate was $849.  Outrageous!  The per hour labor charge is $48.  I have a $500 deductible.  I'm thinking I'll just drive a slightly damaged car.  It's pretty old anyway, a 2003 Camry that has been paid for since 2006.

    Hi to everyone and hugs to all dealing with pain and problems.

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