impatiently waiting for my mom's results...

Options
allison4224
allison4224 Member Posts: 1
edited January 2015 in Waiting for Test Results

My mom recently discovered a painful lump in her breast. She had an ultrasound done last week and they said that there was a nodule and 2 swollen lymph nodes. They also said that it didn't appear to show any vascularity. She saw a surgeon yesterday who did an ultrasound of his own and biopsy. He told her he believes the lump, which is about 3.03 cm, to be malignant and would be incredibly surprised if the results come back benign. In fact, he said that if the biopsy was benign he would want to research why because he wouldn't be able to believe it. He did say that her lymph nodes looked normal. I am totally crushed and the waiting is a killer. I feel like he could have been a bit kinder and more considerate of the toll his words would have on a family. Or perhaps I am just bitter. Anyone in a similar situation? I pray that my mom's diagnosis is a positive one and I pray for anyone reading this at one point or another affected by cancer.

· Share on FacebookShare on Twitter

Comments

  • Meadow
    Meadow Member Posts: 2,007
    edited January 2015

    Allison, you are a good daughter. It is obvious you love your mom, and that love makes you both strong. Doctors are notorious for having bad beside manners....it sounds like he will aggressively pursue good care for your mom and right now that is more important. Hopefully, she will get good news. If not, it is not a death sentence. We all here on BCO are living proof of that!. Getting the bad news of "you have breast cancer" is absolutely live changing...but treatment can save her life, and there will be a day when neither one of you think of breast cancer the first thing you wake up, or even at all that day. I know that seems impossible but it is true. There is good health to be had on the other side of treatment. She doesnt want to or need to worry about you, I have to say my kids, 25 and 21, were scared so much when we told them, but they saw me fight hard for my health and helped me by staying positive and in a calm place. Together you and your mom have a journey ahead, and your positive thinking will help her more than you know. Hang in there.

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited January 2015

    Dear Allison4224, welcome to BCO, and your mother is lucky to have a caring daughter like you. That doctor may not have the best 'bedside manner' but we hope he treats your mother well. Nothing is certain until the actual pathology results on the tissue sample comes back. We certainly hope he is wrong and it is benign.

    Meadow has provided some valuable insights into the situation your mother (and you) will possibly have to deal with. Take it a day at a time, but keeping busy and becoming informed are important.

    Wishing your mom all the best

    The Mods

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • roadrash
    roadrash Member Posts: 145
    edited January 2015

    HI Allison. I am so sorry that the doctor was so unkind. I hope our mom gets good test results. Either way, I hope you can help your mom find a doctor with a better bed side manner. Even benign breast issues can cause anxiety and this doctor might be good, but there are better doctors that are the complete package. Please let us know how it goes.

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Denise-G
    Denise-G Member Posts: 1,777
    edited January 2015

    My 80 year old mom was diagnosed with Stage 1 Breast Cancer in June, 2014.  We had gone through my own Stage 3 diagnosis and treatment, and mom was my main caregiver - so this was doubly rough.   After her biopsy, the Radiologist who did the biopsy called us in to her office.  She said she knew we had been through a lot with my diagnosis and didn't want us to have to wait.  She said she believed mom had breast cancer and if the biopsy came back negative, she would send it to a different lab. 

    Our reaction was opposite -  we were both so grateful the doctor told us to prepare.  It gave me time to get a breast surgeon and oncologist in place, and we already had the appointments scheduled when we got the call that it was definitely breast cancer. 

    It is so hard to hear cancer from any doctor at any time no matter what the circumstances.  I went through it with my father's Stage IV pancreatic cancer diagnosis.  I took it out on the doctor.  I felt angry and out of control.  It is a normal reaction to such devastating news.

    There is hope the doctor is wrong...but if not, take this time to talk with people to find the best breast surgeon and oncologist in your area.  In my book, that is the absolute key.

    Sending my best...

     

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter

Categories