Winter rads 2014-2015

Rads #1 completed. Very surreal experience. I kept thinking to myself when they were taking x-rays etc to make sure everything was set up right that I didn't belong there. "How did I end up here and then I have to keep coming back. I don't want to do this." I guess I still think I am going to wake up from this bad nightmare and be happy again.

Fionascotti - which part of South Carolina are you in? I live in a Myrtle Beach. It sure was cold today!

Saltygirl - radiation has definitely been the easiest part of this journey. I've done 21 out of 28 now and no major side effects. I was tired the first week, and my skin has just started turning red but that's it. I had immediate implants and my PS said that any implants can develop capsular contracture, not just radiated implants. And he said that the alloderm he used adds a layer of protection over the implants.

As for Herceptin I haven't had any side effects with it, other than that I do think it's causing my hair to grow in slower than it should

I was thinking on the table as I bared my saggy boobs of a video of my BS who referred to "pendulous" breasts. That gave me a good laugh over her more tasteful term. My husband loves to say, "Put a sock under that pendulous breast."

You can do this Saltygirl.  I have my last boost tomorrow!!!  YAY!!!!  Does it suck? The daily grind sucks, but it gets better with time.  The only SE I had was peeling skin under my arm, but nothing Silvadene couldn't help.  My husband has been my biggest cheerleader and is taking me out to dinner tomorrow night to celebrate being done with all my treatments. 

Am I the only one who'll never be able to eat a rotisserie chicken breast again?! I've finally got the combination of creams figured out, so I'm doing much better. Only 5 more to go after today! My RO said sensitive skin just reacts more strongly and is harder to treat/protect because many of the creams can cause additional irritation. I'm so thankful she and the nurses kept working with me to get the right combination. They've also given me a supply of disposable post/surgical "breathable" bras all the time. The more air I get, the better it heals and the less it holds heat. I don't care so much how it looks, thankfully!

Meanmomto3 - I didn't know whether to laugh or cry at your chicken breast picture! Very funny on one hand, but on the other, sadly and very real. Good sense of humor, anyway!

Glad to read you are down to your single digits - hang in there girl, you are almost there!!

Cath57,

You will get through this. We all have had some reservations about doing rads...just take one day at a time & just accept how you feel daily & know that it's okay to cry, vent or whatever helps relieve the stress. I am now in the hormone therapy phase of treatment & so far except for feeling a little warm occasionally, it's going okay but I do know that the SEs can start at any time. What kind of art do you do? I really like hearing about the different things people have the talent to do.

Carynbrit+Give your Hubby a chart of how much stress he is giving you. That will dwarf the cost of your cancer treatments.  I was not one to leave people. My husband left me for soemone else. Best thing that ever happened to me. So,I now am strong enought to take care of myself. I would kick him to the curb

zjrosenthal - I love your thinking about not wanting to miss today and only wanting to go through this once, rather than a thousand times in your mind. That resonates with me. Thanks for posting that. We are human, and we worry and we do need to mentally prepare for some of this stuff. During radiation, I felt like I was always in crisis mode and couldn't choose anything but worry. Now that it's done, I am returning to my life where cancer doesn't rule over everything else. I feel like I have choices again on how I want to look at life. Looking forward to that time for all of you as well

Lots going on here!

Cath57 - Yes, what do you do?  How has all of this impacted your creativity? Wow, wow, wow!  If you are able to make a living with art, you are clearly very talented and pretty darn good at what you do....(And you work hard)  That is not easy.  If I did not have an additional income, I'd be living under a bridge somewhere and starving.  I know a few others who can do it, and their work is exceptional.  BTW - Sounds like you have a very compassionate RO. 

zjrosenthal - I definitely agree... once is bad enough. Multiple trips through it is the pits. 

dacre - Welcome. Seems to me that a trip to HR might be a good idea for you.  My son is an HR director for a big company, I'm going to throw this scenario at him and see what he has to say about it.  Meanwhile, document the abuses and keep those emails.  As for how you will feel... everyone of us is different.  If you go through it like I did, you can work every day.  I'm certain that for others it was a very tough proposition. 

Carynbrit - It's tough enough to go through all of this with good support.  I can't imagine how difficult it has been for you.  I'm so sorry.  Visualize yourself surrounded by a shield of light to create a layer of positivity that bounces all that negative energy away from you.  You might be surprised what your mind can do to protect you and give you strength.     

Thank you CoyoteNV!  HR has been contacted by my Union rep which is how I discovered that my supervisor had already been in touch with them.  I have copies of all of the emails and HR and my Union rep both agree it is "bullying", and have assured me that all of my paperwork is in order and that I have been in total  compliance.  My supervisor was also given this info from HR but I don't think was too  happy about their reply.  To appease her, HR told her to just document any "misdoings" on my part and submit them to HR.  It's just so uncessary to have to deal with such an immature person.

To Catie57 I have talked to my supervisor since the the day I was diagnosed....I was actually at work when I was told over the phone.  She has been made aware of every step of the process, but still expects me to be able to inform her well in advance of things I don't even know about yet. As far as office coverage....well if you know this work situation you would laugh.  The office consists of 3 full time people and 3 part-time people.  Most of the time I am the only person here so that I cannot even take my lunch break b/c the office must be open during the hours of 8:30-4:30.  All of the times that I have done this  not once was it ever recognized....given any extra compensation time so that I could go to appts without having to use my own personal time.  While I was out, there was coverage, or maybe not, but the place is still here and functioning whether I am physically sitting at the desk or not.  I just don't feel that her added stress is in anyway healthy or positive for me.  So, I don't think talking to her at this point is even a consideration....especially since the only way she will communicate with me is via email.

dacre I would stick to the email as then you have all of her demands in writing. I am half way through and while now retired, I could have worked during this period. Some people have said the fatigue accumulates and might impact work in the last couple of weeks. Also be aware that our "grads" have said that SEs linger a week or two after the last treatment.

eileenpg ( I used to live in Sebastian btw once).. I hear that.. I actually said it was still cheaper than a funeral and the care of our daughter afterwards and every single thing else I do around here (which is it all except for a wage.. im in college) but to him 'wage' trumps anything else and I dont earn anything.. ironically every time I 've had a job and done really well.its got sabotaged..usually with a big move (across to another state for instance..). Right now.. well. I started college last summer..because I just need to get a decent job for MY future.....then out of here I go...Even if its just a few classes at a time.. Cancer was a massive roadblock...but don't they always happen like that?but even in such a time..his 'stuff' continues..I'm past the point of no return.

PoppyK I wish I was still in CA! I'd take you up on it! (Ive lived all over the place,trawling around after him as he changed jobs) Good luck with the labs!

CoyoteNV haven't lived there lol.. but put my food across the boarder near Tahoe..just because I could. Thanks.. I tend to do that.. i've been doing the shielding for about the last 3 years.. been seeing and talking with the womens shelter too.. because of the things he does and situations he puts me in. I can do okay most of the time..just deflecting it..and not absorbing it..but of course some times I can't get there..so .. but anyway.. I'm pretty strong! I know that much.

Rads today #21. Went okay.. definitely looking sun-burnt now and swollen..was told to increase the amount of times I applied the aloe and think about taking Ibuprofen for the swelling (inflammation). I'm good with it though..it's all right.

Hope everyone has a decent (good) weekend.. I know I like to have weekends 'off' from treatments

x

Coyote, I love your work. I don't have any artistic ability, but I admire those who do and appreciate their talent and their work.

Caryn, It shows under your name that you live in North Carolina. My brothers live in the Raleigh area, which is why I offered their services. Have you tried contacting a local cancer group for counseling and/or support?

Dacre, It definitely sounds like a hostile work environment. You are covered by federal law. You have rights as a cancer patient. Here is a website I found helpful: http://employment-law.freeadvice.com/employment-law/job_discrimination/employee_rights_for_cancer_patients.htm

Here is some info from that website:

Here are a few accommodations available to cancer patients in full- and part-time employment:

• leave for doctors' appointments and/or to seek or recuperate from treatment;
• periodic breaks or provision of a private area to rest or to take medication;
• adjustments to a work schedule;
• permission to work at home;
• modification of office temperature;
• permission to use work telephone to call doctors;
• reallocation or redistribution of marginal tasks to another employee; and
• reassignment to another job.

Sorry your supervisor is being a jerk. No one should have any thing else to deal with when they have to fight cancer.

Coyote, I get a smiley face, please!!!!!  I am done, done, done!!!!!!  WOO-HOO!

Caryn, just be careful.  It sounds like you are in a volatile situation. 

Darce, Welcome to the group.  Poppy is correct, you are definitely covered under ADA and any HR department knows the rules and regulations when dealing with cancer.  Your boss is bullying and harassing you.  My husband is union and it is a really big no-no not to let you have a lunch or even breaks.  Radiation is a lot easier than chemo.  I did mine on my lunch hour, but I was only 5 minutes from the center.  I finished today, YAY, and the only SE I have is itching.  I always emailed my boss with doctor's appointments and sent a copy of the email home.  If the email happened to disappear or my boss said she didn't get it, I could send it to her again and still have my copy at home.  CYA, Darce!!!!!  Can you apply for FMLA?  That would really peeve her off.