Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?

Welcome cloesmom! I'm so sorry that you've had to make this journey but am so glad that you found us. I worked all my life....just like you. I taught school for 33 years and ran my own business fo 13 years. I thought I would be lost when I finally retired but I never took time to look back! I'm busier now than I was when I was working all those hours. I love it!

Wren. I have a grandson that also turns 11 on December 29th and another one that turns 9 on January 17th. It's gotten to the point where I do all there birthday shopping during the Christmas season and split the packages up. I feel sorry for them, too! My Mother's birthday was December 22nd and she taught me early in my life that I should never wrap her birthday presents in Christmas paper! I only made that mistake once and I was quite young at the time! :-)

We actually saw the sun today! It wasn't bright and it didn't last long but it did appear!

Birthdays around the holidays can get lost in the shuffle. It does make it easy to do all the shopping at once though. My first daughter was born 3 weeks after New Years. I learned real quick to buy her presents before Christmas because shops haven't restocked in January. My second daughter was born Dec. 13 and I used to wait to do any decorating until after her birthday. Then I realized I could still make her day special even with a Christmas tree in the next room. My son was born Dec. 23. Poor kid never had a normal birthday party. Most of his friends had left town for Christmas already. I have a Dec birthday as well but it's at the beginning of the month so it's far enough away. My sister was born on Dec. 26 and that was not a good day for a birthday party. The worst one was my brother who was born on Jan. 2nd. No one is interested in party fun by then.

Last night, home alone for the first time in about 10 years because Mike is in the hospital, I began to get emotional. This is what it would be like if something happened to him. I think slowing down for the first time all day allowed my pre-op nerves to kick in and then get mixed in with worry about him. After a restless night I was up and out the door early to visit him and see how his night had gone. They gave him two units of blood last night and he had a little color and a bit of energy. His blood tests showed an improvement in the hemoglobin but by this afternoon, it was back down. Other blood tests were inconclusive and confusing to the doctors. His white blood cells are normal so there is no infection but his red blood cells are dying too fast. He has little red marks on his legs and feet and his tongue has raised red marks plus some white places. Other symptoms are puzzling too so the internal medicine docs called in rheumatology docs for a consult. They called in a hematology doc this afternoon. Tomorrow morning they are going to do a bone marrow biopsy. This is getting serious and for the first time, Mike is getting really concerned.

I wanted to postpone my surgery but Mike wants me to go ahead and do it so I'll be showing up at the hospital early in the morning. Hopefully I'll be finished and into my room by early afternoon. Mike will come down from the 6th floor to the 2nd floor in his wheelchair if he is permitted to. I imagine he's going to be plenty sore since they are taking bone marrow from three locations, but knowing him, he will come check on me anyway. I'll have heart monitors and other telemetry things attached to me so I won't be able to go see him. What a mess, huh?

Sending healing thoughts to both of you. Hope everything looks great by tomorrow night.

Morning gals!

Teacher, isn't it fun to just listen to little kids talk to each other? When I see the little ones next door, it just makes you smile to hear them, and see them sharing and playing with each other.

Sometimes when we are older, I think we just lose that contact, being around younger people... and we really miss out on a lot... Same with spending time with those OLDER than us... We see life with a different perspective...

When we see Theresa & Eddie at the Assisted Living place, I realize they TOO have a lot of things that makes their lives happier, and they aren't just sitting there, waiting for the inevitable... I had breakfast with one of my friends... she is 91... Now I can't believe that she is still driving EITHER, but what would you say to someone like that? She is always ready to go somewhere, and her mind is the same as OURS!

I guess I should just treasure the breakfasts we have together...because she really IS fun to talk to.

Teka, that picture is so pretty, and peaceful! Yes, Hot Apple Cider with a cinnamon candy in it!

I remember I used to like that Southern Comfort in Egg Nog! Or Baileys in hot coffee! No... can't drink while we are on meds, right? But I bought some champagne for Christmas morning brunch... with Eggs Benedict!

Jackie, that is so good about our own corner of the earth! You and I think so much alike... even with the weather... It's like okay fine... the weather is not nice today, but there's always tomorrow!

Morning Rita & Joan! And Welcome Chloesmom...:) You are still much younger than some... meaning me...Ha! Yes... this is just one more thing that we have to get over, with the least amount of pain and stress as possible. If you can keep busy.... occupied, and not too tired, and come talk to us, you will be alright!

It COULD be worse... like you could be as old as ME, and then after BC you fell and broke your hip, had a few screws and a rod to hold yourself together, and I STILL would not stay down!

And THEN my stick shift CHEVY gave it up, BUT I got another "new" car, so I am good to go now... ! But I have my Husband of 57 years, and my 2 grown Daughters, all my friends, so that's what keeps me going.

Hi Puffin, Blondie and Wren!

Now Sandra... I know what you mean... about missing your Husband... I wish I could make you not worry.. It's like when they are gone from us, for any length of time... even a couple hours, we start to worry!

I remember when I took HIM to the Doc, then on to the hospital, because "something is really wrong"... They whisked him right through, put a pace-maker in the next morning, but that night, your heart just won't stop hurting. You keep thinking "what-if"...

But as bad as it seems now, it sounds like he has a great team, and they will come up with something that will help him.. They are calling in professionals to look out for him, and figure out what is going on... It's like you wish it were you, instead of him.... I know.

He wants to make YOU feel better... and not worry about him, and that's why he wants you to go ahead with your surgery...

Maybe call each other if he can't come see you? Tell me again... WHAT are they doing to you? Geez, it just makes us all worry..... Yes, you are in a pickle.... but just let us know as soon as you can...

And Franklin is a sweetie!

Yes.... prayers all over the place for you two! xoxoxo

“Your uniqueness
is your greatest strength, not how well you emulate others.”

- Simon Tam

Thinking of you, Sandra.

Welcome, Chloesmom. I'm 65. I was a teacher for 36 years and am enjoying my 5th year of retirement. I volunteer at our library and will begin teaching a crochet class at the Cancer Support Community in January. I never have appointments that require time in rush hour traffic.

My mom's birthday is Dec. 15 and we always put our tree up then because she wanted to. A friend's birthday is Dec. 25 but her family always celebrated it on Feb. 14.

thanks for warm welcome!!!

Since having surgery a week ago it seems I'm on some goofy sleep schedule. 11-4 then 6-9 and lots of hour naps. Maybe it's the fatigue from BMX or the fact that they had me out for 3 hours for the surgery and then a second surgery the same day for a huge hematoma, but I feel old for the first time in my life. Never sat still before to acknowledge fatigue and now feel like a slug

Have to admit that my life was out of balance. Before BC I was burning the candle at both ends. Self employed working 50-60 hours most weeks. No time to socialize, exercise, have fun. We have an adult daughter who is disabled and I have wanted to put away any extra to help her so never turn down work. Someone upstairshas said "enough". Time to get life into balance. There is more to living than being productive. It's exciting to think about the possibilities of reducing the work load when I go back. Am taking 8 weeks plus as I have an active job and want to spend time at the gym at the YMCA to build up strength. Thankfully I told them I'll be back when I'm. Back and don't have a date. Don't know if it will take longer since I'm not a spring chicken.

Enjoying all your posts. Hugs! Susan

Life is not easy for any of us.  But what of that?  We must have perseverance and above all confidence in ourselves.  We must believe that we are gifted for something, and that this thing, at whatever cost, must be attained.
 
Marie Curie

Thanks so much Jackie! You really helped me put things in perspective. I have always been positive. A family member sarcsstically nicknamed me Pollyana and I took it as a compliment instead of the dig it was meant to be. Anyhow I think it was just the fatigue that hit and made the perfect storm.

Such a new feeling for me but then this has been quite an emotional month. Got official Dx on 12/21but saw tumor on US on 12/14 and could see it was irregular and invasive. All in a few weeks to be arranging to leave work, get 2nd opinions from BS, PS, have BMX, having emergency 2nd surgery same day when bleeding all over the place, my birthday this week, holiday season, dog turning 14 and having health issue, ...... Who wouldn't be tired So glad to have you all here that understand.

Thanks for kind words Wren. BTW Chloe is my dog off to take another nap

After a whirlwind four days, Mike and I are home. I was released from the hospital a few hours ago. Mike got his release from the hospital last evening after 3 days. We are both enjoying "recliner time" complete with obligatory cats on laps, naps and fuzzy blankets. My surgery went fine, I'm glad I went ahead with it although I considered cancelling it several times. I always have Mike with me in the pre-op area but this time I was on my own. There's no reason for me to feel vulnerable in the OR holding pen since I've spent so much time in there over the last 15 months but this time I felt like Alice in Wonderland who had shrunk too small. Everything around me was big, intimidating and overly bright. I really wanted to head for the nearest exit. It was nerve wracking because Mike was upstairs having a bone marrow biopsy and my mind kept saying, "Your place is upstairs with your husband, not down here with hospital bracelets and an IV, you selfish girl." Soon the anesthesiologist came to discuss what drugs I wanted for the surgery vs. what she wanted. (I won. After five previous surgeries, I KNOW what works and how to avoid post op nausea.) Things moved fast after that. She started the Versed and off we went to the OR. I hoped onto the table and the next thing I knew I was in recovery and my husband was standing there! He had told his nurse he HAD to be there for me so he left his floor to come to me. By the way, he said the bone marrow biopsy was not painful even though all he got was a shot of lidocaine. I've heard most people are put out for that procedure. Tough guy. His pelvis is sore today but he says he is fine.

The internal medicine guys did their tests on Mike the first day, the rheumatologists did theirs the second day, and the hematologist was called in Friday because the tests were not making sense. She ordered the bone marrow biopsy and said it could be kind of bone marrow cancer. We won't know for a week since the holidays are here and the samples were sent to three different labs. Mike was feeling so much better after the 2 units of blood he received Wednesday. His hemoglobin had been down to 6 but was 8.2 after the transfusion. It started falling again, but very slowly so the doc felt he was no longer a fall risk and could go home. The restrictions from his cataract surgery at the beginning of the month have been lifted, so he can now bend forward and pick up the things I am restricted from doing for the next few weeks. Good timing. A tag team effort!

Surgery #6 was the final one for me. The plastic surgeon did fat grafting and final repairs. He harvested a bunch of fat from my upper abdomen and used it to fill in all the painful hollow spots on my chest (divots and troughs) from the double mastectomy last August. The infection I got in the hospital that same day caused me to lose parts of three muscles and most of the soft tissue on my left side. I've had 4 additional surgeries to repair the muscles under my arm and on the front of my shoulder so I have a bunch of zig zag scars, ugly tissue flaps, and very deep hollow areas. The surgeon grafted tissue into the areas that needed it and removed what shouldn't be there so it looks smoother. I won't be scaring little children with my Frankenstein arm anymore.

Thank you for all the good wishes. Time for another nap. I swear that anesthesiologist slipped in some other kind of drug that is giving me "cloudy brain after surgery" brain.          

Sandra, I'm so glad your surgery is over and that your dh is home with you.  We'll all have our fingers crossed as we wait for the results of his testing.  It's hard to believe the turn of events in your life--that you BOTH were in the hospital at the same time!  I admire your courage in going ahead with your surgery. 

Susan, good luck to you in this new phase of your life.  I remember so well the fatigue after my BMX but I had reconstruction at the same time, which made the recovery even more difficult on my body.  It's a balancing challenge--to rest as much as we need to rest and to gradually begin to do more to regain our strength.  Your positive attitude toward improving your life will help you as you go forward.  Feel free to complain and even whine occasionally!  You've earned the right! 

Rita, I hope your travel is safe and that you have a great Christmas holiday with your son and his family. 

Jackie, it hardly seems possible you've been helping out this lady for a whole year!  I remember well when you were starting the job.

Chevy, I think I heard on the national news about some woman out in Denver whizzing around in her new car!  Just don't start feeling like you're Jimmy Johnson behind the wheel! 

Greetings to everyone.  Hope you're all buying more presents than I am or else the economy is REALLY going to suffer!  This has been my non-shopping Christmas except for buying three bikes for my niece's kids.  I will be buying groceries and cooking for Christmas Day dinner so that has to count, too, right?

Sandra, Glad you're both well enough to be home where it's all comfortable and cozy. Get all the rest you can to help heal. I'll bet Mike's problem is an aftereffect of that recluse bite. Hope they come up with the cure right away.

Mimi, Good to see you again. Waiting to hear about your adventures.

Every person must follow his or her own process.  No one else knows what is right for another.  There is no goal in living our process, except to live it.  Our processes can change.  Our lives can change as we participate in the process.  Our only requirement is to trust the process and live in faith.  Our responsibility is to live out what our Creator asks of us.  To live our lives.  Living our process demands a deep spiritual commitment of being one with one's life.
 
Anne Wilson Schaef

Sandra, good to hear that you and hubby are home and recuperating. Hope the doctors come up with a plan for hubby soon.

I spent all day yesterday out with 3 other people counting birds for the Audubon Christmas Bird Count. The temperature was about 30 all day, overcast, but damp feeling so glad I'd put on my layers. All our snow has pretty much melted so we were able to hike along the river without having to trudge through deep snow, and water wasn't frozen at the sugar beet processing ponds. We spent a long time with our spotting scopes scanning for different duck species. Had a fun day, all teams met for a pizza supper for the final tally. Our team found 29 species, grand tally was 54 so we were happy with that. After the tally we went to a Christmas party at a friend's house. He always has a white elephant gift exchange, everyone gets a #, # 1 opens a gift, #2 can either steal that gift or open a new one, and on it goes. Lew and I brought the gifts that ended up being the most wanted ones that got stolen over and over. I'd brought a wizard statue (about 8" tall) that I'd gotten at a silent auction at a Sci Fi convention, and Lew brought a copper sailing ship that was also a music box that ran on a battery, When you turned it on the ship moved up and down like it was sailing and it played music. He paid nothing for it - found it on a recycle table at my Dad's apartment building. It was bent and out of shape and Lew fixed it. Both items eventually ended up with owners that really wanted them.

Weather is taking a shift toward freezing drizzle and slippery roads tomorrow, so we're leaving this afternoon for our holiday trip to see family. Going to Brainerd first to visit Lew's mom and sisters and a granddaughter, then heading to Burnsville, MN to see my Dad, and grandkids in St. Paul. Will be home Dec 30th. Should have internet access along the way so will stop in now and then.

Hope everyone has a relaxing time with family.