It seems to just keep getting worse. (or, am I over reacting??)

We understand vent if that's what's needed Hun! My biggest axillary lymp node was about 4 cm after chemo it shrink to about 1 cm. So I know how scary it can be and IBC symptoms only get worst but you start treatment next week correct? You need to be starting chemo right after your port is in place. Goodluck, I will keep you in my prayers!

Rosiesgirl, the MRI is far more sensitive than the mammogram, and its findings reflect a different point of view, so to speak, not tumor growth.  The reason they want the MRI is for a better look.  That's all.  If you were to repeat the mammogram now, it would probably show exactly the same picture, and same size tumor, as it did a little while ago.  And yes, we all worry ourselves nuts until we get the treatment plan in place, so worry away, but try for a relaxed worry. 

I always feel the early period after initial diagnosis of breast cancer is like watching a train crash or a motorway pile-up ..... or perhaps BEING in one.

I was the same. It started out looking like a speed bump, but then the full picture gradually emerged and seemed to be a parade of bad news.

You will feel better once treatment has started, I'm sure. And looking back 2 years on my early days, things are gradually settling back down to speed bump dimensions once again.

You WILL get through this, and you will be ok.

Pretty much what Brookside said. When I actually had my surgery, the final pathology report showed my tumor to be closer in size to the original needle biopsy estimate than the MRI's estimate in tumor size (larger). That is really what you get from both MRI and needle biopsy, an estimate in size. And I did nothing (no chemo, etc) to decrease the tumor prior to surgery (other than wishing/hoping) the size was what is was all along.

Over reacting? I don't think it is really possible when diagnosed w BC. You feel what you feel and it's okay. Venting is one way of coping, so whatever works for you..........................

I think there are two things happening--one is the slow motion diagnosis which is slowly rolling out with all its contradictions. The other is the slow motion acceptance of our diagnosis. Some days we're deep in denial, other times we're deep in despair.

Hopeful82014- thanks, I hope the tamoxifen works for me as well.

Hi Rosiesgirl! Please don't worry! Just take one day at a time.... You are just beginning out on this scary diagnosis, and we've all been there! You said you were having a port put in? So you are getting chemo before the surgery? I have heart of a lot of women doing that

Sounds like your "team" is covering all the basis.... trying to heal you as much as they can before the actual surgery?

Make sure you write down all of your questions, and then the answers, as you ask these guys! Keep all of your records and reports... and your scans. Your Doc's should give you copies..... So many women.... even my Doctor.... Have had this type of treatment before their surgery! So feel confident that you are in good hands....

And sometimes talking to family isn't very helpful.... they are afraid, and they don't understand either.... You can vent here anytime.... If we can't help you by answering your questions, maybe we can make you smile!

Rosiegirl,

It is pretty common for your US and MRI to give different results. My US indicated that I had one cancerous lymph node. My MRI showed, to use the highly medical jargon I was told, two additional nodes that looked "shadowy." And, according to my MRI, one mass had grown 1.3cms in 12 days. Since the size of the two masses that were biopsed also changed in size within the same two hour appointment, I just figured the issue was with the technology and not because I was being devoured by IBC. No, I didn't come to this conclusion rationally -- disassociation does have some good aspects.

What I learned (eventually) was to focus on more useful information. Finding out that I am triple positive gave me much more useful info than possibly having a couple of shadowy nodes. Look, you're doing everything right. All I can suggest is what the wise women here told me. It is hard enough to wrap your mind around the idea that you have cancer, grab a calm friend to go with you. She can take notes, steady you, and help mediate things with your MO. And get a big file and get copies of every test result, exam result, and any piece of paper that concerns you. And hang onto it. I also got a small notebook and wrote down every question I had. Although all of that sounds like a depressing hassle, for me at least, it gave me both a sense of control and allowed me to be more proactive than I might otherwise have been.

This last year has kicked my ass. But I also have NED. You're on a bumpy road but please remember two things: you can handle this and IBC is survivable. And this board will be here to help if you want it.

Best wishes,

bride