Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?
Comments
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Hi All,
We are looking to share your journeys on our website. Recently we started a new section on acknowledging our dear members of the community (http://www.breastcancer.org/community/acknowledgin...).
November is Caregiver Awareness Month, and we want to share stories to and from caregivers. If you are interested in sharing your story on our site, please Private message us your story, your inspirational message, suggestions, advice to other caregivers, and a photo of yourself or something that represents you.
Many thanks!
The Mods -
Acceptance is not a talent you either have or don’t have. It’s a learned response. My meditation teacher made a great point about the difference between a reaction and a response: You may not have control over your initial
reaction to something, but you can decide what your response will be. You don’t have to be at the mercy of your
emotions, and acceptance can be your first step toward empowerment . . . For me, acceptance has been the cornerstone to my having an emotionally healthy response to my illness. Morrie Schwartz -
Sorry about the quote -- I did everything I could think and could not make it come in without the breaks in the paragraphs. Even put it on my Notepad first which often helps and it did broke at the wrong place.
We started out so gray this morning, and now am seeing a line of blue sky and white clouds. I think ( according to the weather report ) that will likely be temporary. But never-the-less, it is nice to see. I do better without constant gray, dull skies so I'm feeling more cheerful already.
More news on B. Cosby that I'm trying to ignore. More 'women' and accusations and talk of some man escorting women to the Cosby dressing room and then standing guard. The man at 90 yrs. old says he now feels dirty. Lots of feelings about that. Bless his heart if he has repented -- but he, the women and Cosby too ( if this took place and that is not for me to say ) all had to know that it wasn't for a game of Scrabble. Guess to my way of thinking ( Dh and I discussed it this morning ) anytime you choose to spend time with an adult male alone, and maybe even more so one who is somewhat famous, you put yourself at a certain level of possible risk.
Of course, these events should not take place, but it seems to me most of these people were at an age and time when they should have had some healthy suspicion going on. I'm not saying it is their fault by any means, but that there has never been a time in my "adult" life that I couldn't figure out some strong possibilities over certain behaviors and adjust accordingly. I've been to some degree on both sides which is why I see things as I do. I would not wish to seem mean or un-caring either, but I still wonder -- why now. If you haven't come to grips with it in 30 or more years you have had, then what will FIX it now ???
Nuf' about that. Sure am looking forward to Thurs. Well, I really like Thanksgiving. For the most part all of my memories are such very good ones --- smells wafting all over the house, and a great meal and then later on -- almost always a turkey sandwich with a lot of the "sides" from dinner re-heated and back on the table. Of course, it never hurt that through most of those years I was fairly skinny so never had to worry about calories during the heavy-duty eating that it often turned out to be. Boy, when some things change -- its not so great. Well, the end of yr. holidays is probably what sparked the new yr. resolutions which for a lot of people meant "eating right" again to repair all those end of the year gastronomical "SINS". Onward for the day. I'll be checking in later.
Blessings,
Jackie
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I saw an article online yesterday about the 50 things you shouldn't eat over the holidays. Included almost all the foods that make the holidays special. It might be healthier to avoid them, but I'm willing to just do a little bit and enjoy the specialties. The only Thanksgiving food ok to eat were the brussels sprouts and turkey breast.
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I'm making up a new dressing this year - to fit in with the crazy way hubby and I are now eating.... Almost all vegies and a little quinoa thrown in. If it's edible, I'll let y'all know.....
If not, then I'll smother it in gravy and eat it anyway. -
Jackie, did you see that note from the Mods? I think you should tell YOUR story, for our new members to see how much you have gone through, and how you have come so far!
You have a special way with words.... like you have talked to us on this thread.... and I think it would really help new gals who are just starting out. They sent me a PM about 6 months ago I think.... and I did it also!
So I hope you do it!
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I did notice that and I will give it serious consideration -- I really will. Just got back from town. Paid some bills, picked up a couple of things at Aldi's. They are such a neat store. It is a "German" store actually. I think they take debit cards but no checks -- so check-out is always quick. Also, they charge a quarter for your cart --- so most people will take it back to the cart corral so as to get the quarter back.
This is SOOOO not anything about cancer, but I wonder --- if more stores would do that -- how many people would just forget the quarters and continue to leave their empty carts in the parking space, half way out in the drive aisle, right up against my car or in any number of other places where they shouldn't be. Even at Aldi's some people have just handed me their cart --- and as they are walking off tell me to keep the quarter --- and I had one in my hand to give them because I already had it out to release a cart for myself. Still, they were on the way to the cart corral so they were going to do the right thing -- just took the opportunity to be "done with it" right now.
GG -- your dressing sounds like it could REALLY be good. I think Quinoa is really versatile in use and is an excellent ( usually highly recommended by nutritionists ) food to have in your pantry. I'll be very interested in how that turns out. The nutritionists I talk to also say to try to only use real butter, olive oil, lots of Kale, dark colored veggies, the darker the better for the most part, as little sugar as possible, and fresh fruits and veggies as often as you can get them. Says to lay off most juices and eat the fruit instead. Also they recommend Almond Butter ( with extremely short ingredients list ) rather than Peanut Butter since the Almond Butter is purer, but I keep both as I just like the taste of P-Nut Butter.
Ok, see you all later.
Jackie
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Chevy, I agree. Jackie should definitely tell her story.
Well Saturday was not a good day for me. I started out early in the morning to pick up two other ladies to go to a craft show . I got about 2 miles from my house and hit black ice when I attempted to stop at a T intersection. My car started spinning and slammed into an embankment. Both air bags deployed and my windshield shattered. The car had to be towed and I'm still waiting for the body shop to give me feedback on the damage. I was pretty shook up but an angel must have been riding with me that morning because my left hand is very bruised where the air bag hit it and I have a bump on my head but no other serious injuries. I have never had or been in an accident and I was pretty shook up! My little car didn't fare as well and I am still waiting on the body shop to give me an estimate and opinion on what they think I should do with it.
Puffin, my son spent a few years in the Brainerd area in a small town called Deerwood. He was the general manager of the Parker Hannifin plant there. The area is lovely but I quickly decided that it wasn't for this "summer" gal when we went up for Easter and had nearly 6 inches of snow! :-)
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Oh my word !!!! I'm almost speechless -- almost. Black ice is such a terrible thing. In all my years ( furiously crossing myself, throwing salt over both shoulders because I can't remember which one -- any anything else that I can think ) I have not actually encountered black ice --- though there has at times been a fair share of ice I was highly aware was present. I can almost imagine what a shock to your system -- also, unlike other situations -- I don't think you would have time to do much of anything on black ice but just go with it, even were there something to do.
I recall that this car was going to be your 'last' convertible. Thinking of that since insurance companies always seem so quick to want to total cars. With the depreciation figured in -- you get nearly nothing to replace your car, but most people don't think about that at the time. So, it comes to if you want to have your car repaired or not because I envision the Ins. hoping you will allow the "totaled" designation. Most of the time ( if the frame itself is not involved ) the car can be repaired.
I'm just thrilled to hear Rita that your injuries seemed to have all been minor save for the mental duress. I have not had much of anything -- Dh and I were hit from behind once, and a lady turned right into me one day a long, long time ago, but otherwise ( can you hear me knocking on wood quite soundly ) nothing and yet while those were extremely minor events, just knowing that in an instant an impact was going to take place just sort of erased all ability to ANY kind of rational thinking. Both times afterwards I had to spend a few seconds to get back to myself. I'm sure you did too Rita, my good friend. Sending lots of positive energies to you and sure hoping for a good outcome. Also, that loads of time do not have to pass for you to get a satisfactory resolution to car repair or replacement.
On to the next project for the day. See you all later.
Jackie
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Rita, I'm glad that you came out of that accident with no serious injuries. How scary! My one experience with black ice was walking on it. I landed flat on my back! It happened one Thanksgiving when we were travelling to Decatur, IL, and hit a snow storm outside St. Louis, in Arnold. It was so icy that I insisted on stopping at a hotel even though we were 3 hrs. away from our destination. DH and I were walking from the hotel to the Cracker Barrel restaurant next door. It was rather dark and I stepped on the black ice, which was something I was not acquainted with before then!
It was another mild, sunny day here. Seems foolish to leave and head north to heavens knows what kind of weather. But the rental car is parked outside. The audio tapes from the library are inside the car. DH and I both are mostly packed. So off we go tomorrow.
I didn't have a lot to do today. I caught up on laundry and did some ironing.
I'll be taking my laptop computer and should be able to keep up with the conversation on my favorite bc.org forums.
A good evening to all.
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*Good Evening*
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Rita! That's awful. You must have been shocked to the bone. Hope your "paw" get's back to normal soon.
Teka, I always enjoy your cartoons. Here's a poem for Thanksgiving.
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As usual -- starting to anticipate the fun in funny just seeing a graphic and the words Thanksgiving Poem !!! Not disappointed. I love them both.
Jackie
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Sunday, we had a lovely early Thanksgiving dinner. Now to enjoy a week of leftovers!
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Black ice is so treacherous. Glad you are ok, Rita.
Love the poem, Sandra.
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Teka -- yum. If I were any closer you'd be having some company to help you finish up those leftovers. I like the turkey bones and make casserole along with turkey noodle/macaroni soup. I could eat the soup alone for months -- that is how much I love it.
Jackie
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Rita glad u r ok
Thanksgiving means football n my boys with yheir mommy. Not thst i dont likr my girls but boys just love them, excited
Slept from 3am to 830pm, steroids sucks
Getting off 2 read
Happy Tuesday
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Oh Wow Rita! I know the feeling! Your heart just stops... almost!
We were driving up in the mountains early one morning on a fishing trip, and it wasn't light yet... So I was going UP this hill, and hit the black ice, and your car just spins EVERYwhere! We were going up Berthoud Pass.
It finally stopped crosswise, in the middle of the road, and a SEMI was coming down!!!! FEAR, PANIC! Lights flashed before my eyes, but I got it started, and got it moved over to my lane....
MAN, I just sat there and cried. You canNOT see black ice... night or day. Just a sheet of ice..
I don't drive in the winter weather anymore, unless the roads are 1/2 way clear.
Getting another car TODAY!
And Carole, you should write down your story also for the Mods! You have such a sensible way with words, which I can't relate to.... And I think YOUR story would be great! Especially about all of your travels... etc!
Sorry about your fall! There are no kind of shoes that help you walk on ice... Better to walk in the snow, than on the ice... I don't even need ICE to fall! Just a little rock to trip over!
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This is the "rock" I tripped on, when I fell....
I must have not seen it..... -
Goint to get another car today!
DH doesn't think I need one .... even THOUGH my clutch is completely gone, and the door handle is broke, and this one is 15 years old! But I will get one, with or without his comments... I have wanted one since I broke my hip, and trying to drive a clutch was really hard! So 9 months later, I have made up my mind..... DD and her friend are taking us......
Funny how independent I became.... and obstinate...but I'm not listening to any more excuses about why we don't NEED one.... like "Let's just wait until Spring".... "We don't need to go anywhere" "It's too cold out"..... If DH were any more "set in his ways" he would be a ROCK!
Advually I would like something smaller like a Chevy Cruz... etc. I'll post a picture later....
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Tell him u will go get it yourself. ..
U deserve it,
Can't belirvr u r up this early, i haven't gone 2 sleep yet
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Chevy,
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Have you ever watched small children playing alone in a room? They will talk to themselves, and they will answer. They will dress themselves up. They sing and dance. A small child in a room all alone can have a marvelous time entertaining him or herself. Children can do this not only because they have an innocence that helps them to rise above the cares of the world; they don’t mind being alone with their thoughts and dreams. They don’t mind acting out their fantasies. They can live their lives beyond the expectations of others. In a room all alone, children have no inhibitions. They have nothing to prove and no one to satisfy but themselves. They feel free! They are unencumbered by opinions and directives. It happens because nobody is watching them.
Live your life like nobody is watching you.
Iyanla Vanzant -
Chevy -- Dh is not watching you and not talking either --- he knows when you have DECIDED what is right for you, yourself. You are the MAJOR driver in your family 99 percent of the time. So you go, gal !!!! Standard transmissions were a wonderful thing -- and for a long, long time, the only thing. I personally feel when we get to a certain age -- the comfort of driving should NOT include a stick transmission. We have enough to do and should be able to avail ourselves of the comforts ( bad ears, squeaky joints, arthritis ) of sitting in our car and JUST driving without all the extra maneuvers a clutch requires. Fingers crossed you find exactly what you want and what you certainly need.
Blessings
Jackie
p.s. so sad for Missouri today. It is a real mess there. Guess it was foolish of me to hope they could get through the grand jury without these horrible eruptions.
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Thanks Jackie.....! And one with plastic/leather seats too! It's like sitting on Velcro, with these seats!
I just knew if that Policeman wasn't found "guilty" to stand trial, there would be riots! He did what he had to do! The by-standers lied... I listened to the report last night. I feel sorry for the Policeman AND his family.... I'm sorry too, for the life lost, but some people just instigate a fight!
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOAN811- Hope you are rested enough from your trip to enjoy your day. We haven't heard from you lately- if you can, please let us know how you are doing. We miss you. Anne
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Sandra...I loved the Thanksgiving poem. How cute!
Carole...Be careful driving as you head up to Illinois. We had an inch of snow yesterday but most of it is gone now and and right now they are calling for a 50% chance of snow on Wednesday. My kids will be travelling on Wednesday so I hope we don't get snow. Mainly it's just cold and windy today. Right now it's 23 degees. How long will you be staying in Decatur?
Happy Birthday Joan! Celebrate your own special day in style. I'm so glad that Anne sent you a birthday wish because I didn't realize it was your birthday and we need to celebrate these birthdays!
I'm anxious to hear about your new car, Chevy! Post a picture!
I am finally calmed down after my little encounter with the black ice. The body shop called this morning and they said the insurance company gave them the "go-ahead" to fix the car. We know the body repair guy and know he wouldn't give us bad advice. He said the frame wasn't bent and he'd have no trouble getting it alligned to our satisfaction. I guess I'll see what it's like when he's finished with it and if they did a good job, I'll probably drive it another year and then trade it off. It will just sit in the garage for 3 months this winter because we take Dave's Suburban to Florida. I really do like the car and it only has 37,000 miles on it. They didn't know when it would be finished and ready to drive because they had to order parts and we're working around the holiday, too.
I spent a good part of my morning in the grocery store. Gads I cannot believe the high prices of nearly everything! The two of us are pretty conservative when it comes to eating during the week but that changed drastically when planning 3 meals a day fo 7 of us! I really don't know how large families do it and it sure doesn't look like the prices will be going down any in the near future.
Who else is cooking for Thanksgiving?
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Happy Birthday Joan -- Hope your birthday is just as wonderful as you are and many, many more.
Best Wishes,
Jackie
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Chevy, we most definitely want some pics of your NEW to you car.
Carole, it won't be great but hopefully Illinois will treat you right while you are here. The weather should be sort of all right. Hmmm, that is like saying I'm sort of young. Of course, I'm not but I'm admitting to nothing negative so looking for all positive things for you too.
We are not cooking at our house, but going to my employer's house for Thanksgiving. Dr. B and I took my charge to the foot Dr. today. Afterward we went to Pump Jacks to get a bite for lunch. That was nice to have lunch out. There were a few of those one-armed bandits so Dr. B gave Sally a $20.00 bill --- she turned it into almost $40.00. Great that 98 yr. old women can be that "fortunate" -- so lunch was nearly paid for. One of the reasons I like where I work --- my employers make it fun.
Rita, I sure hear you about those groceries. When you add the things you buy that are not strictly food -- wow I keep checking to see if I still have all my arms and legs. This keeps up I'll have to get a couple more jobs. Maybe urge the better half to do the same.
Anyway -- hope you all have a great Tues. today. Travel safe for anyone doing so.
Blessings,
Jackie
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