DIEP 2014

jmb5 - Even if you're hanging on by a thread, you're still hanging on. Quite an accomplishment!

I can't take credit for my tagline, but I love it too. They were the comforting words a friend told me when I experieinced a total post treatment melt down and didn't think I could even find my thread. Jut by saying that a meltdown is part of the coping processm she gave me an incredible freedom to accept my healing as a non-linear path. And it gave me the freedom not to resist my big reactions. And to cry like no-ones watching, and to fall asleep under my duvet with a bag of chips. 

Hi ladies.  I've had a unilateral mastectomy in July 2011 and have been waiting since for a DIEP surgery.  I finally got an appointment today for a CT Angiogram.  I assume this is the first step before getting my surgery date.  Hopefully the wait won't be too much longer.  But I do have mixed feelings about the surgery.  Is there any runners here?  How long before you could get active again after surgery?  I've only started running in the last year and I've done my first 10k race last week.  I would love to train for a half-marathon within the next year.  Will it be possible after a DIEP surgery?

youngmama - check out the thread Let's Post Our Daily Exercise here. Lots of women are very active post DIEP. 

@ youngmama  there is a 2014 Running Thread, where there are a few people (at least 3) who had DEIP recon.

Seashore: Excited for you that your date got moved up! Last week to get ready--go for it! I will be thinking of you on Nov. 7. 

youngmama: I started running again after my stage 1 at about 7 weeks post op. Truthfully, I have found that on days I run, my pectoral muscle is a little sore during the day. I would say my new DIEP breast is about a B cup, and my healthy breast is a C cup. Supportive bras help. I had a tissue expander in place, so it could be that my pec pain is more than you would experience if you did the mastectomy/reconstruction in one surgery.

Thanks ladies.  I will go check those threads.

Good to know Teacher. At what point were your breasts their final size? I'm almost 5 weeks post DIEP and they still seem kimd of big to me, although the DH says they're good, lol.

My breasts weren't their final size til after stage 2 and fat grafting. They were evened out and filled in. 

Wintersocks...so, so sorry you are going through this emotional turmoil right now.  Are you able to postpone the surgery into the new year?  I know it may not be the most ideal option but if it relieves a bit of stress and allows you to participate in the work project it may be a relief to move past this temporary set-back.  My BS and PS said that you can wait 2 - 5 years for the DIEP procedure....and I believe there are several ladies on this thread who have had them many, many years after their initial treatment.   As a single mom myself I know how work issues can weigh on your mind during this journey....I worked from my laptop just a few days out from my mastectomy (I already work from a home office) and had no issues.  I was off work but the nature of my job requires a check in every now and then when I am away.    My plan is to do the same after the DIEP although my PS may not agree, I will at least be checking in with colleagues and status of projects.  Perhaps some of the other ladies will chime in with advice about physical ability to do some work.....  

 My youngest son was 17 when I was diagnosed and while we didn't have any conflicts I know that it was very much a difficult time for him.  Sometimes boys are not able to share emotions and fears as well as their female counterparts so perhaps his behavior is a sub-set of his concern for you and his fear of the future (this may be especially so for kids who have divorced parents during a cancer diagnosis).  Is it possible to sit down and have a heart to heart with your son, maybe ask him for his help and assistance during this time, perhaps explaining that you may need help with grocery shopping, preparation of meals, help with pets, etc...will give him a sense of adult responsibility even just in the short term it might build some self-esteem or confidence?  Is it possible to ask his Dad for assistance in helping to ease some of the tension in the relationship?  Every situation is different, have you thought of seeking out some professional help, they may be able to provide some guidance for both your current concern with surgery/work and help you work through issues with your son?

Not having a solid support system just adds one more layer of difficult to this process, I am sorry you have this to deal with in addition to the other stuff.  I have found that my on-line and local BC support groups are really helpful.  My cancer center has several groups that meet at different times, the local hospitals also offer some kind of outreach as well - are any of those options for you?  

I wish you the best for your surgery and hope that you find some peaceful relief for the other things you are dealing with right now...       

Wintersocks, so sorry to hear about your

 difficulties. I am almost 5 weeks post Diep. I would have to say even working from home may be hard your first week at home, more realistically during week three. I went back to work part time after 4 weeks. Monday, I'll start full time. I'm feeling pretty good now.

Your first week at home you may need some help. Its difficult to get out of bed to prepare yourself food. The drains are horrible and you are simply exhausted. Plus you can't drive., truly can not drive, your body cannot turn to look behind you. 

Hoping all goes well for you.

Wintersocks,  I'm so sorry you're in such an unsupported and miserable place.  You and I have said hello before on the Stage III boards, and you're like a UK friend to me.  I wish I had brilliant advice to offer.  Speaking for myself, I didn't feel much like phone calls or working from my laptop for a couple of weeks.  After that, it was a matter of pacing myself.  I went back to work full time--at a desk--after five weeks at home and did fine.  But...I have adult kids, a supportive husby, and the freedom to take a nap under my desk if I need to (just kidding). 

Maybe it would bring you peace of mind to delay the surgery a bit and arrange for you son to spend your post-op period with his dad, if that's realistic.  There's no rush to have reconstruction surgery, although I know you're looking forward to getting it over and done.

Winter - Can you postpone your surgery to the new year, when your project is complete? I know what you've been through, and it's an awful lot. If you need this job, it might impede your recovery to be chomping at the bit to get back to work. Healing is a really personal process, and different for anyone. I went back to work after three months, because my job is quite physical and I decided to let myself heal well, and heal slowly. I think it took me a bit longer because I was bilateral, and because my stomach was pulled super tight  because I 'didn't have much fat' (news to me) to make two breasts. Because of that - it took me a long time to stand up straight. Had I had a desk job, I could have gone back to work in half the time. 

sbelizabeth has a good ideo about sending the teenager to his dad's place while you recovery. You don't need that kind of stress. Better not to have any unpleasant suprises. Seriously, you need a break. 

Debiann - My nipples were made using the skin from inside my crop circles. I've heard it referred to as 'kind of like origami', but don't know the official term for the procedure.

I understand about feeling grossed out about big nipples, and cutting them down to size - I felt the same. But my procedure was so painless, and I'm so happy to have something there, so I'd have no qualms about getting them tailored to my liking. The nipples protectors and daily bandaging is a pain in the arse, but it's a happy pain this time 'round.

Dear Ladies and friends,

Thank so much for all the advice.

Meg2 ~ I really really don't want to postpone.  I feel that this has to be the one positive in 3 years of utter crappyness. I am 54 in Feb, and feel that if it is not done now I won't ever do it.  I agree that boy's can be difficult emotionally to work out. But he just does not see why he should help with anything I ask of him. I have also tried to have a adult discussion about the cancer and this op, but he just squirms to escape.  I feel that he has to go to his Dad's post op as I cannot have him around, it will really impede my recovery. It makes me terribly sad but I have to put this first.  I did  get a bit of counselling, post tx, I did not find it so useful as I was in such a dark place.  When will you have your DIEP?

Mary625,  How you got back into working has made me feel better.  I am fortunate to be able to work mostly from home. If I give myself 2 weeks off save for mail, and if there is a meeting I should go to maybe I can SYKPE.  I have looked into Red Cross 'home from hospital' service and they may be able to help with practicals.  Thank you.  

Youngmama - Oh, you will be having the Diep just before me, I too feel lost and alone with it. Strange I thought I might be happier to be having a new breast, but don't really feel that way at the mo. We can go through it together.

selizabeth, Yes, I am your UK friend and know we have 'spoke' a couple of times - What a nice thing to say, thank you. I know I should probably delay, that really does make sense. But on the NHS I will go to the back of the queue. Also, I have so geared myself up for it.  I cannot stand this lump of jelly stuck to my chest much longer. 

kb33, wow, you certainly didn't hang around. Thank you that made me feel a bit better that you were able to get going sooner than you  expected.  Perhaps I can. 16 hr days? wow! I'm impressed at your stamina. 

janet, yes, you do know some of the crap I've had to put up with. Thanks for listening to it all.  yes, of course you had 2 done. That must have made recovery longer than a uni. Yes, I think the teenager will have to go to Dad's.  Your dialogue on the new nips is terribly funny. Do the nips always go on following the DIEP? never at the same time?

jmb5 ~ Thanks for organising all!     

Ok girls. Just got to Sebastian, FL for the winter and found a new pea sized lump. I am 2 years out of DIEP and a skin and nipple sparring surgery. It is near my original BC site. Didn't think I ever had to worry about this again. I am pissed.

Is anyone out there familiar with Breast Specialists on the Vero beach/Melbourne area?

What could this be?

Hi Ladies

Just popping in to say hi.  Had second revision surgery on Tuesday.  First time for fat grafting. First time for compression.  Uggggggggggh

Fortunately PS said that I would only wear compression for 2 weeks since fat taken from stomach.  Fortunately it is getting cold enough to wear big sweaters so compression and surgical bras will not show.

Wintersocks - so sorry to hear that you are having trouble at this time.  I agree with others that son will have to visit dad for awhile.  My 17 year old grandson is having similar attitude problems. 

Cherrie - I think that we will always worry.  Hopefully this lump is just scar or fatty tissue.

Lili Ri - Glad that you found doctors that you like.  I think that is an important factor is our treatment process.

JMB - Glad you are doing better.

Healing prayers and hugs for all.