MIDDLE-AGED WOMEN 40-60ish

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  • MinusTwo
    MinusTwo Member Posts: 16,634
    edited October 2014

    BookLady - for the bald head - I used only a small amount of original Head & Shoulders.  It kept my scalp from itching.  I kept on with this until my hair had grown back at least 1/2" long.  And I was always cold so I kept a "buff" in my car & tied to my purse, etc. 

    http://buffusa.com/sports/collections/filter/origi...

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  • glennie19
    glennie19 Member Posts: 6,398
    edited October 2014


    So I had my HX on 9/29.  I was expecting hot flashes, and I got them.  What I wasn't expecting was not being able to sleep!! Night sweats, yeah,, but just not being able to sleep at all.   My estrogen level went from over 500 to being undetectable!! 

    What have y'all done for sleep??  I can't use Ambien. Valium helps a little, but still not restful.  Melatonin??  I'm seriously thinking of asking for a low dose of estrogen so I can "taper" down, like a natural menopause, and see if that helps!!  Yesterday when I was driving, I actually felt impaired due to sleep deprivation. This is rather worrisome!!

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  • PoppyK
    PoppyK Member Posts: 1,805
    edited October 2014

    I'm on Restoril. It helps me fall asleep, stay asleep and I wake up well rested, not groggy at all. When you sleep well, you feel so much better.

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  • MinusTwo
    MinusTwo Member Posts: 16,634
    edited October 2014

    Glennie - for sleep - try Sonata.  I've found you can take that as late as 1am if you can't fall asleep and still be bright-eyed at 7am with no dry mouth or groggy side effects.  I only take 5mg.  My BFF takes 10mg.

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  • Furfriend2
    Furfriend2 Member Posts: 299
    edited October 2014

    Joni, great news for you! Way to go girl!!!

    Furfriend2

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  • mel147
    mel147 Member Posts: 479
    edited October 2014

    glennie - awesome that your estrogen level is undetectable now!!  Hope you can things figured out to be able to sleep better...I agree, sleep deprivation is no fun!!  I keep wondering about that one ovary I have left if I should be getting rid of it or not.  It hasn't been mentioned yet, so I just have that in the back of my mind as a question to ask.

    missingmerc - hope all goes well with the tests and that your crohns is not acting up.  I also liked the quote and picture

    Barsco - I did get some cleaning done today, so I'm chipping away at it!  I think it is so neat that your community is coming together and participating.  I'll bet it will grow and grow!

    booklady - no problem on the typo...I just thought it was some slang that meant I was "cool" like you were saying - "Hey - did you hear about that mel, she's bust!"  Ha, ha!!

    Good night all!

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  • Eph3_12
    Eph3_12 Member Posts: 4,781
    edited October 2014

    Dianarose!  Good to see you!  Glad life is happening on the level you were hoping for!  Yippee!!!!!!

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  • Tomboy
    Tomboy Member Posts: 3,945
    edited October 2014

    I take benadryl, i dont wake up groggy, plus, it helps with any inflammation. i used to drink camomile & valerian tea, but had to get up to pee so many times!

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  • NativeMainer
    NativeMainer Member Posts: 10,462
    edited October 2014

    Dianarose--so glad
    you and DH were able to work things out and it sounds like you are having a
    grand time together!Praying the lump is
    just scar tissue.

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  • chipmunk57
    chipmunk57 Member Posts: 58
    edited October 2014

    Booklady, when I was bald I just used my facial cleanser all over my head. Then right after my shower I put a little bit of  Neutrogena body oil on my scalp to keep it from drying out in our cold Canadian winters. Smile

    image


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  • nitengirl1
    nitengirl1 Member Posts: 38
    edited October 2014

    Hi ladies, I m joining this thread as well as a few others.  PoppyK, you are going to think I am shadowing or stalking you on these boards. :)  Im 46  and am about to start the whole chemo than radiation than HT stuff.  Starting to do all the research and chemo education stuff.  My question is how are ya 'lls kids handling this. Mine are 15,13,10.  I think Chemo scares them the most.  

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  • Eph3_12
    Eph3_12 Member Posts: 4,781
    edited October 2014

    nitengirl1: my daughter was 14 when I was diagnosed & 15 during my chemo/radiation phase.  When I told her I had cancer, she never let on to me that she was scared--she was a rock actually.  But I found out after the fact that she confided her fears to her small group leader & small group friends from church.  She told me from the git go not to be scared, SHE KNEW I WOULD BE FINE!! That ended up giving me permission to freak out in front of her on occasion because she always centered me back to baseline. During chemo she was always on the hunt for new & exciting flavored popsicles.  It was summer time so she even made some.  I am not certain how life would have been if she hadn't been so strong.  Children are resilient and I believe, if you approach everything honestly & nothing hidden (yes, my hair WILL fall out!) they bounce back fairly quick.  This is all my experience & my opinions though.   

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  • PoppyK
    PoppyK Member Posts: 1,805
    edited October 2014

    Hey Nitengirl,

    I agree with Joni; kids are resilient. They also mirror the reactions of you and DH. I sat my kids (16, 15, 11yrs at the time) and told them that I would be having chemo, it would be difficult, I would have good and bad days, it would take months, but that I would be okay when it was over. I answered any of their questions and told them they could talk to me any time about it. I told them it was up to them if they wanted to tell their friends, teachers, coaches or other adults in their lives. I suggested a few adults (other than their Dad and I) that they could talk to or go to for support. Be honest with your children or they will not trust the info you give them down the road.

    My youngest doesn't have any preconceived ideas about cancer and chemo, so he doesn't have the fear that comes with knowing people can die from cancer. My middle son is the sensitive one and want to do simple things like make me tea or sit and talk to me. My oldest is a pain in the butt teenaged boy. He is says he doesn't want to think about me having cancer and he is focused on my being okay when it's all over (chemo and radiation).

    I thought my kids would be freaked out by my losing my hair. They aren't... not even a little bit. When they see me weak bothers them much more.

    You know your children better than anyone else does. You know what works for them and what their needs are. They are remarkably strong. If you appear frightened, they will be, too. I let them know that I don't know everything, but that I will do everything I can to kick cancer out.

    Hugs,

    Poppy

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  • missingmercury
    missingmercury Member Posts: 161
    edited October 2014

    I use a little of the shampoo I used when had hair, Nioxin.  I bought it because my hair was thinning and it was supposed to help stop that.  Seems ironic now.  Anyhoo, figure this is my opportunity to work on my scalp.


     

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  • BookLady1
    BookLady1 Member Posts: 253
    edited October 2014

    Hey everyone- hope the weekend is good for all.  I finished steroids last night so am winding down. Which is better, crazy or tired? Looking forward to a couple of weeks until round 3.

    - Macatacmv - thanks for the jigsaw puzzle idea for my steroid crazies! Surprised my 18year old son when he got home from school to see me working a puzzle! You helped create a bonding time! Thanks

    - MinusTwo and Chipmunk57 - thanks for the baby scalp care ideas! Forgot about my old favorite  Neutrogena oil and didn't know about the Buff. Good for winter walks walks with my Abby Airedale.

    -MinusTwo I love Louise Penny and that quote speaks to me, too!

    -Mel147 - you ARE so bust! 

    - missingmercury - what a lovely scalp you must have, and now to get relief for your gut.

    - PoppyK and Eph312 - so much truth and wisdom in what you shared about our children and our chemo. This needs to be shared. 

    - nitengirl1 - I hope you find some peace with this. I have seen that the more my kids (22 year old DD and 18 year old DS) see that I am still me and that I have a circle of support that they are a part of and their lives are okay...it helps. 

    Linda

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  • BookLady1
    BookLady1 Member Posts: 253
    edited October 2014

    Hey everyone- hope the weekend is good for all.  I finished steroids last night so am winding down. Which is better, crazy or tired? Looking forward to a couple of weeks until round 3.

    - Macatacmv - thanks for the jigsaw puzzle idea for my steroid crazies! Surprised my 18year old son when he got home from school to see me working a puzzle! You helped create a bonding time! Thanks

    - MinusTwo and Chipmunk57 - thanks for the baby scalp care ideas! Forgot about my old favorite  Neutrogena oil and didn't know about the Buff. Good for winter walks walks with my Abby Airedale.

    -MinusTwo I love Louise Penny and that quote speaks to me, too!

    -Mel147 - you ARE so bust! 

    - missingmercury - what a lovely scalp you must have, and now to get relief for your gut.

    - PoppyK and Eph312 - so much truth and wisdom in what you shared about our children and our chemo. This needs to be shared. 

    - nitengirl1 - I hope you find some peace with this. I have seen that the more my kids (22 year old DD and 18 year old DS) see that I am still me and that I have a circle of support that they are a part of and their lives are okay...it helps. 

    Linda

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  • macatacmv
    macatacmv Member Posts: 1,386
    edited October 2014

    I thought you all were being real quiet, but just realized that this thread had been dropped from my favorite topics. lol

    linda, you're welcome, glad you got some bonding time with your DS. 

    glennie, I have night sweats still. I just started taking trazodone (rx) to get some sleep. I was struggling for so long. I just take 1/2 a pill and only wake up twice a night. I work closely with my PCP to get my quality of life to where I can handle it. 

    welcome nitengirl, try to be as honest with your kids as  you are comfortable with. Keep the communication flowing. This is a process for all involved. Especially in the beginning while everything is so unknown. Hang in there and here.

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  • elimar86861
    elimar86861 Member Posts: 7,416
    edited October 2014

    Hello, nitengirl!  I had two teenage sons back when I got diagnosed.  Both seemed only mildly interested in what was going on with my cancer treatment.  At times, I wondered if they were in denial, or budding young sociopaths, or just simply being self-absorbed teens that they seemed so unphased by it.  Now, I realize they were not too concerned due to me having a fairly good prognosis and due to having confidence that I would make all the best decisions to take care of the BC...that they trusted in my ability to prevail.  I'm not saying that was necessarily realistic, but just a reflection on how they perceive their mom.

    Also, looking back now, I am as happy as can be that it did NOT impact their lives in some major way.  While I was having a bad year, one son was having  pretty good senior year in h.s.  I would have felt twice as bad if BC managed to take that away from him somehow.  That's just me and my situation.  Everyone is a bit different and the kids' personalities play a part in how they go through it, but I am in agreement that you can never go wrong with honesty.

    p.s.  Dianarose, if we know anything about you, it's that you are one lady that knows how to turn a tough situation around.  Glad to hear your latest news...happy travels!  

    p.p.s.  To most of you others:  Be it drugs, menopause or "just because," there are definitely reasons why this thread has the sub-title "Home of the Hot Flash."  Ahahahaha!   (Wiping off sweat, then more laughter.)

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  • glennie19
    glennie19 Member Posts: 6,398
    edited October 2014

    Welcoming thoughts on sleep meds! 

    Melatonin:  have tried for 5 nights.  3 mg.  Not sure if it is helping. One friend is concerned that if I keep taking supplement, that my body will stop producing its own.  Any thoughts on that?

    5-HTP:  it's a precursor to melatonin and serotonin. Recommended by another friend. Don't really know much about it. Going to research it.

    Years ago, I took Ambien every night. I also have fibro and thus a sleep disorder associated with it. My body was physically dependent on the Ambien and it was REALLY hard to get off of it.  So I am hesitant to take anything every night.  Thinking of finding a few things to help with sleep and then alternating, so that nothing is taken more than twice a week.  Like I have an RX for Valium,,, so I could take that twice a week. And then find other sleep aids for other nights.

    Thoughts??

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  • elimar86861
    elimar86861 Member Posts: 7,416
    edited October 2014

    glennie19, I use melatonin but not on a daily basis, and not at the higher doses available.  Currently I have the 3mg. tab, but usually split that in half.  I, too, have heard that staying on it continually will suppress the natural production.  One thing about making your own melatonin...you need Vitamin D to produce it.  

    Since getting BC, like most of us, I have read that we need to keep our Vit. D levels up at the high end of optimum.  I try to get natural sunlight, but I use supplements also.  Since supplementing, it seems to me that I sleep better because of it, possibly because I am making my own melatonin.  Melatonin production falls off in Mid-Age (like so many other things that conspire against us.)  Anyway, I'm just saying to make sure you have a good Vit. D level.  I think that helps.

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  • glennie19
    glennie19 Member Posts: 6,398
    edited October 2014


    Hi Elimar,  

    My Vitamin D level is good. My PCP has been testing that for a few years now and I am on supplement for that. (despite living in the Sunshine State!)  And you have also heard that staying on melatonin will suppress your production too.   Thanks for the reply.

    Love the new Halloween pic!!

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  • elimar86861
    elimar86861 Member Posts: 7,416
    edited October 2014

    One more thing...  I was just out walking with my MP3 on, listening to some reggae, and it made me think of all who were/are or about to be chemo-bald:

    One day you are a dreadlocks

    (wear dread)

    Next day you are a bald-head

    (clean shaved)

    It might not be quite that quick and I know Max Romeo wasn't singing about chemotherapy, but that's a fairly accurate description.  The song is called "One Step Forward," and that seems appropriate too.

    I didn't have the chemo that makes you lose all your hair (mine did thin a bit) but I do remember thinking that IF I had to get a cover-up cap, I was going to get one of these...    What the heck, people gonna shoot you a look either way!                       

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              

    image

                                           

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  • glennie19
    glennie19 Member Posts: 6,398
    edited October 2014

    You are so right,, they will be looking anyway.  Go in style,, reggae-style! 

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  • MinusTwo
    MinusTwo Member Posts: 16,634
    edited October 2014

    Checked out the Max Romeo YouTube.  Liked the version with the Upsetters.  Thanks for the reference.  Haven't heard good regae in awhile.

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  • mel147
    mel147 Member Posts: 479
    edited October 2014

    glennie - Although I haven't tried this, I believe this is the one my sister-in-law is taking.  I think she said it is pretty much Benadryl.  I will try to double-check with her this week to make sure this is the brand.  She has had to take something ever since menopause hit her.  Good luck tonight - sending happy sleep thoughts your way!!


    Introducing ZzzQuil - A non-habit
    forming nighttime sleep aid for when you just need a good night's sleep.
    From the makers of Vicks NyQuil. For the relief of occasional
    sleeplessness, reduces time to fall asleep if you have difficulty
    falling asleep. Non-Habit Forming. Not for colds. Not for pain. Just for
    sleep. Sleep soundly so you can wake refreshed. Not for treating cold
    or flu.

    • Package Quantity: 1
    • Health Concern: Insomnia
    • Includes: Sleeping Aid
    • Health Facts: Contains Diphenhydramine HCl
    • Product Form: Liquid
    • Suggested Age: 18 Years and Up
    • Product Warning: use caution while driving
      a motor vehicle, ask a doctor if you are pregnant or breastfeeding, ask
      a doctor if you have prostate issues, consult a doctor if you have
      heart disease, do not use with other diphenhydramine products, consult a
      doctor if you have a breathing problem, not for children under the age
      of 12, consult a doctor if taking prescription drugs
    • CPSC Warnings: no_warning_applicable
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  • NativeMainer
    NativeMainer Member Posts: 10,462
    edited October 2014

    FYI--diphenhydramine is the chemical name for Benadryl.

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  • glennie19
    glennie19 Member Posts: 6,398
    edited October 2014


    thanks, Mel.  I checked it out, and it is Benadryl.

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  • mel147
    mel147 Member Posts: 479
    edited October 2014

    Glennie -  I just spoke with my sister-in-law and the one she takes is actually a generic form of unisom but is also really just Benadryl.  Kind of funny, though, as I'm not sure why they are coming up with all these other names for it...why not just tell people to take regular old Benadryl?  She said it helps her fall asleep better and if she does wake up during the night, she is able to fall back asleep more quickly if she has taken the meds.  She still has her ovaries, but she hit menopause a few years ago and is still dealing with the sleep problems and hot flashes.

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  • glennie19
    glennie19 Member Posts: 6,398
    edited October 2014


    Benadryl is off patent,, so everyone can make it,, and they all want you to take THEIR brand!  Plus diphenhydramine is too hard to say. Benadryl is much easier. I am glad that it is working for her. These hot flashes suck.

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  • justamy
    justamy Member Posts: 532
    edited October 2014

    I used to use benedryl but it quit working for me because I basically need an every night med. I take meds for depression so my doc just adjusted those. For occasional use, benedryl works great!

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