Choosing nonreconstruction on the BCO web site?

Thank you all for your comments and suggestions, which we will certainly pass along to the editorial team!

• The Mods

Thank you to everyone involved in getting this sorted out. I joined the site back in July, I think. I've been high risk for many years and my mother is currently a 19-year survivor of DCIS and a UMX without reconstruction. When I had surgical excision of ALH in July, my risk factor jumped to "very high" and I started to consider PBMX. Having had many years with the possibility of BC in the back of my mind, I had never imagined myself going for reconstruction, should the need ever arise. It just doesn't fit for me. On my very first visit to this site, there in the left column was a tab about forgoing reconstruction, and I immediately felt a sense of peace. That tab is there thanks to all of you--special thanks to MT1 and the Moderators!

I have since continued to investigate my options. Needless to say, I've had very little outright support when I express the desire to go flat. I understand that. I was truly taken aback, however, when my BS shared her opinion with me. Surely I'm not the first person who's opted out of reconstruction! At her insistence, I've consulted with one PS this week and will see another next week. I understand that she wants to be sure she has provided me with all the options, but in return I'd really like her acceptance of my choice as absolutely valid.

Gennie is so right! Do make sure your surgeon is very aware, of what you want. Take pictures with you. Go to Breastfree.org or take a look at the Scar Project, very powerful stuff.

I too, had a Mother who had BC, but for me, they said, just about a 12% familial link. I would have assumed more, but here I am. She didn't have recon either and I believe it was her grace and dignity, not to mention the wicked sense of humor she had about it, that has made it a fairly easy transition for me.

I was lucky, my Surgeon was fine with me not wanting recon, he just said that the door was not closed, I could have it later should I decide to do it. I knew it was never going to be something I wanted, but I still ended up with a "Dog Ear", which is a bit of extra flesh, under the arm. It bothered me enough, to have it removed about 15 months after my Umx. Best thing I ever did. I am flat and no longer have any zinging nerves in that piece of flesh. 

The great thing about this site is that no matter what your question or issue is, there is always Someone who has experienced something similar, who is willing to jump in and share. Ask away, there are many of us living completely flat, half flat and many with every kind of recon available!

Take it easy and let us know how you're doing!

Lilith, I just read your post on the other thread and then came over here and here you are!

I am sure I can speak for Glennie too, it is a pleasure to help!

It's such a mine field out there and I know, I found it was easier to bounce things off others who had been in the same, or similar situation. People mean well, but unless they, themselves, have faced the decision, they really don't know, what they would do.

The accumulated knowledge here, is breathtaking, we are all women reaching out to each other and paying it forward. 

Let us know how you get on, it is a huge decision that you are making, but you will know what's right for you, don't allow anyone to try to tell you, what you "should" do.

Hugs from me to you!