The news isn't good

HOPE,

I had 1 node show on US , It later showed in MRI and PET SCAN.

I was told if no node showed they would have done a sentinel node biopsy. If the sentinel node was positive they would take out an area around it, usually removing 6-10 nodes. If the sentinel was negative, no more were removed,

Since they already knew I had one node positive they proceed with ALND. They take the upper level of nodes. My total take was 14. I was lucky I had no lymph or vascular invasion.  There are new staging guidelines for nodes. Isolated tumor cells, and not really considered a metatisis for purposes of stats re recurrences (I forget how many cells) .  Micromet is up to 2mm and 200 cell . Bigger than 2mm and is considered a metastisis to node.

My one node was a micromet and I became the new stage 1B instead of a 2A. My node and breast tumors had different Her2 results. That is how I found out about testing both.

V

hopeful, I had 3 MRIs and I don't remember the no drink rule...drink a lot after if they use the dye and get it out of your system.  I found it loud and you are right, it is kind of boring.   

I am doing well thank you.  Pain is at a minimum so I am thankful.

I just spotted this thread and want to add that you ought to request an oncotype test. It will tell you if you will benefit from chemo or can skip it.

I went to Memorial Sloan Kettering in NYC for surgery and their policy is to only remove two sentinel nodes. Their studies have shown that removing more did not change the statistics of patient's survival, but could lead to Lymphedema. I had two removed and both had micromets in them, which was a bummer. My oncotest score suggested that I would benefit from chemo, so I had it, but I did opt to use cold caps which allowed me to keep most of my hair. I really did not want to go bald, especially after I learned that about 4-5% of people do not get their hair back properly after chemotherapy. Doctors generally do not tell you that.

There definitely are oncologists who specialize in breast cancers, just as there are surgeons who only specialize in breast cancers, I had both. You might have to be in a large city or go to a large cancer center to access them. I live about two hours outside of NYC and went there for all of my doctors, tests and treatments. I stayed overnight at hotels with my husband before surgery and chemo treatments, otherwise I would just go in for the day. The effort was worth it for me.

Enjoy your father's 90th birthday party. My mother absolutely adored her's. It was the best gift we could ever have given her. I hope your father enjoys his as much.

That said, you have to start thinking about yourself. You are about to go through an intense period which will take a lot out of you. Hand duties off to as many other people as you can - and don't feel bad about it. Accept help if it is offered so that you can rest and heal, such as help with meals, cleaning, errands, or at work, etc. 

Be firm about your brothers and other family members having to step up to care for their father, if that is what you will need help with. It is fair to play the cancer card, because you actually have it. You can not allow yourself to get run down during treatment, or afterwards. 

Stock up big time on basics while you feel well, so that when you are tired or not feeling well you will not have to worry about having enough toilet paper, rice or dog food in the house. Doing so made life much easier on my husband and on me over the months I was in treatment. That way he or I could quickly pick up fresh essentials at the market - milk, veggies, meat - without having to do a heavy shopping.

Good luck in whatever you decide to do!

We are a weary group @ times, aren't we? The major thing I've taken from this discussion is something Beatmon said earlier, sorry sweety, just wanted you to know what you said was so on target w/ my inner turmoil :

"You will still be anxious after tomorrow, but believe all of us, once there is a plan of some type in place, it gives you a type of peace that you are doing what you can to get rid of the beast!" Beatmon.

Thank you for that as I have already found that out personally. It's the "NOT KNOWING," that drains us and accounts for 100s of restless nights. I know what my plan is just can't seem to get to the first of it: chemo. Am I nuts or what, wanting that started? No, I'm not, I just want to get on with my life as normally as possible and in that I'm a real "family" member. We all do and that's not asking a lot, right?

But once you have a plan and start, it goes fast. Just take aim at what needs to be done, take lots of notes, educate yourself, check carefully with your insurance to be sure everything is covered, switch doctors if you have to or want to, and most of all be sure people are listening to you. 

I switched doctors and hospitals after surgery just to have doctors that cared how I felt. I had a fabulous surgeon at a leading cancer hospital and still go back for check ups with her, but I did not find the same level of caring or listening in the oncologists there, so voted with my feet and went elsewhere - actually across the street to another renown hospital's Breast Center. It was an excellent decision. I was given the same chemo, but allowed to use cold caps and to ice my fingers and toes toward off problems because the team understood my concerns. I was treated like a person, not just another cancer patient on an assembly line. I went back to hospital one for radiation because of its convenience, but still go for check ups with the second hospital's Breast Center. Sounds complicated, but it is not.

I have learned that we are not just patients, we are also consumers. Cancer treatment is BIG business, and very profitable.

One more thing, look on the bright side. You will be getting very good treatment, and most likely you will be fine afterwards and for a long time to come. Cancer is not a death sentence anymore and a positive attitude is strong medicine that will help carry you through treatment. 

thinking of you today Hopeful, as you seek more answers!  Good luck on your scans!

Hopeful,

There and here for you.

Let us know your home, when you can.

Vivian