September 2014 Surgery Sisters

Welcome to the newcomers. The prospect of surgery can be scary, but I've found that time and information help ease the fear. My original treatment plan was lumpectomy and rads, but plans can change for a variety of reasons. I've now had several months to wrap my head around my upcoming mastectomy, and I'm not as freaked out about it as I was. That said, I've been focused on chemo the past few months and now that I'm done with that, there's a very good chance my anxiety about surgery will rise again. We'll get each other through this.

EverForward, your story sounds a lot like mine. It was supposed to be "just a speed bump" in my life. Lumpectomy and Rads then done. That turned into chemo, and now I'm opting for BMX with nipple sparing recon. 

Everforward - our dates are very similar,  I was diagnosed 1/24, UMX 3/25 and exchange/lift 9/9.  I'm sorry this has been such a long arduous road for you.  I had originally wanted a lumpectomy too, and that's what we thought we were going for, until it was discovered I was multi-focal - so my only option was mastectomy.  I guess if anything - you will be able to breathe a sigh of relief knowing that the cancer will be finally gone!

What a GREAT idea to have a party for them!!!! For "the girls".....it's certainly sad knowing we are "losing" our God given breasts and though we are getting much BETTER ones (I'm going bigger & overall completely different from what I have now, lol) it is sad to see them go from our bodies in this way.....although it's great to know that there are such wonderful advances out there that can take care of us women in this way, and give us the treatments we need (mastectomy and reconstruction). It may be painful, may seem long, may not be all we hoped for, but we all have each other in this group, and for that, I am VERY thankful to have my ~*~*September Surgery Sisters~*~*. 

I am now in the process of thinking, "what can my children & I do for my own situation to say "goodbye" to my old breasts and say HELLO to the new ones coming in the next 6 months? I truly love the idea of you having a party and gathering together to make it a positive thing and bless your breasts after all you've endured. 

Lots of love to you and many warm well wishes. (((((((HUGS))))))))

Marie J Mello

I'm sorry, Sandra.....

I can imagine how stressful that is!! I had a BOTCHED rectocele (rectal prolapse) repair in March 2013 and it failed- the surgeon pulled my entire pelvic organs downwards and now I have a full pelvic prolapse along with a grade 3 rectocele?! I had a grade 2 prior to the surgery. I know how hard it is to deal with the pain and suffer through it. To think you're going in for fat grafting and then get told NOPE, sorry! Is just unbearable......I am so very sorry for you that you have to endure so much right now. I'm here for you. My FIRST breast surgery (well, mastectomy anyways- not counting lumpectomies and core needle biopsies) is on September 23rd @ 6:30am at Noble Hospital in Westfield MA. So I have a ways to go until then. 

I pray that all works out for you. Here I am just getting started, and you've already been through so much! My prayers are with you during this time of pain and uncertainty. I hope all goes smoothly and you're able to breeze through this and get the results you deserve. You deserve to be free of this pain and suffering already after so long. ((((((((HUGS)))))))

Much love and prayers 

Marie J Mello

awww, Sandra, 

What a doll you are. (((((HUGS))))

That picture is beautiful! And a great reminder that what we go through now will only bring us closer to our after life with Him. I find it amazing that the sweetest people live with a smile on their faces and send out peace and love to others while they are enduring their own pain and suffering. That is such a blessing. One blessing that I continue to send forward. There's NO amount of pain that will stop me from giving others some loving advice and kind words. I thank you also for giving me kindness in return. yes, I've been through a LOT......but I keep going, and had to put off my colon removal surgery because my left breast "told" me (hahahha) that I had to check it out and that my PASH tumor was growing again....who knows what's underneath...the MRI showed some serious stuff, but the core needle biopsy only showed PASH (a rare benign tumor) so who knows? They DO check out our breasts once they take them off, right? Yikes..... I am getting the alloderm with expanders immediately after the mastectomy and then will go for my lovely "Fills" until I reach desired peak....I'm thinking 450-500cc's.....because I've always been "small" up there, and my "girls" told me if I'm going to LOSE them, I may as well get something GOOD going on!  SO I am aiming larger than I was previously with my tiny B's.....I'm ready to Shazaam......Caboom! VavaVooommm!!! I am single and one day praying for a man to love me for me, one day I will find one, and he will appreciate my story.....I will come to love my upcoming new breasts, and will start working on my colon removal as soon as my new breasts are on in the next 6 months (possible Crohns disease- was getting diagnosed and then my breast started being so painful that I couldn't do much else other than pay attention to her) I'm just praying I can hold out that long, because I get such severe stomach aches, and my skinny belly puffs up into a 8 month pregnant belly within hours of eating. I keep losing weight and I am now down to 125 when I was happy at 135, I'd love to eat, but I hardly do, because it hurts to eat. I live off of ensure drinks....Funny how our outside can look amazing but our insides are falling apart?! I'm glad to get "new parts" and live longer. That's the great part of being in USA! Best surgeons out there with advanced techniques. Even though I had a botched surgery and I am PETREFIED to go back in and get this whole thing "REDONE" (Ouch!!!!!) I will go back to a NEW surgeon to have my entire colon removed and have the pelvic prolapse and rectal prolapse repairs done hopefully on the same day. I know one thing....that was a PAINFUL procedure- getting the rectocele repair done in my BEHIND!! Oh Lord, My tooshie felt like fire for almost a month, I was in and out of the hospital with bleeding issues, and then found out that he messed it up. Good Grief. I'm a year and a half out from that trauma and it still haunts me, HAHAHAHA.....OUCH. I documented the whole thing on a funding site- gofundme.com/mariejune (glad I DID, because I literally blogged my way out of it all....through all the pain, I now have documentation of everything). So it's helpful if I go forth and get a lawsuit, which I'm too nice for that, but I have people urging me to do so....we shall see what happens....for now, it's just focusing on my breasts being removed and new ones placed on within months from now. It's all new and I haven't done much to prepare....so I am now cramming it all in to make sure my nerdy self is all set to go. 

But, one thing I have learned, no one's pain and suffering is worse than another's. I find it helpful to let you know that I can relate from "issues" from your initial surgery and then you having an infection and removal, because it shows that I've been there in one way or another....when we trust our surgeon and they let us down, it's terrible....or when a dr lets us down, it's just traumatic, because our lives are literally in their hands and we are helpless at that point. I'm glad I met you and so glad you got my response. 

I'm here for you, no matter how long it takes for you to finish the process. You're a gem! what a blessing to have you on our September Surgery Sisters group.  

So much love to you, my dear friend. xoxo

Marie J Mello

Sandra4611, I'm the same way. I can't take the good pain killers. The IV drugs are ok, but the orals are terrible for me. I get SO sick. Once off the IV drugs I'm on plain Tylenol. 

MarieJune when I had my partial hysterectomy at age 29, everything was prolapse so I had a cystocele and rectocele repaired at the same time. It was a rough recovery! I ended up having to have the rectocele redone about 6 months later because I developed a fissure between the rectum and vaginal wall. Thankfully I never developed any infections. 

I had a tummy tuck 5 years ago by the same surgeon who will be doing my BMX repair. She tells me this recovery will be very similar to the TT. Some parts easier and some parts a little more difficult. 

hi Lespring.  

You can certainly relate to the prolapse repairs, huh?!?! Good Grief! Talk about pain! I need it all redone all over again, am pretty certain I also have a fissure due to some "strange" and rather not pleasant experiences I have daily, along with pain! Ouch. The pain....it's unbearable at times- but, us women somehow are superwomen!! Put a cape on us and let us run the show. Lol. 

I was too scared to return to the same surgeon who botched me up, so I went to new drs, and they have me the new full prolapse and grade 3 diagnosis. How fun! :-/ lol, have to laugh, because today was a "bloated belly, looking pregnant within seconds @ walmart while school supply shopping".....instant bloating and pain- ugh. My breast beat me to the surgical bed! Lol. My body is in a race with itself, those girls won the "prize" (some prize huh?) just thankful I don't need chemo or radiation, don't have a cancer diagnosis as of now, praying after surgery they don't find anything, and I wake up with my nipples. I'll be soooooo happy if I get granted that simple wish. My density factor blocks out everything, and MRI looked bad, but the place they grabbed the lump with core needle looked like PASH, a benign rare tumor that has grown larger and pressing on nerves causing pain, but under there, who knows? Soon I'll find out and hope for no more tamoxifen or anything- what a yucky med. I had major side effects. Glad to be off of it as of a year ago.  

My prayers and well wishes are with you, my friend. I wish you the best and will be keeping an eye out for updates. (((((Hugs))))) to you for all you've endured and still go through today. Stay strong. I'm here for you whenever you need to talk, laugh, cry, be sarcastic and make jokes, anything- I'm here if you need to talk. 

Marie J Mello

Sandra, that last one made me laugh hard! Where do you find these things?

Hello!  I'm new to this site and am scheduled for a lumpectomy on Sept. 4.  It was found through my yearly mammo and then a biopsy. There is still so much I need to learn, but I can tell that this site and the ladies here will be a great resource for me.  It came highly recommended by two of my friends.  

I'm a little nervous about what my breast will look like after the surgery.  I feel kind of guilty for worrying about this when so many others here have it much worse than me. I'm not going to know the state of my cancer till after my surgery, but it seems like I have reason to be optimistic.  I'm very at ease with my BS...she is wonderful!

I think I need to find an area on this site that will explain more of the acronyms/abbreviations....thanks everyone!

Musiclady, my lumpectomies (I've had three!) were a piece of cake. Like Marie, I thought the needle biopsy was more uncomfortable than the surgeries. They gave me twilight sedation, which knocked me out completely (I've heard that others stay somewhat conscious with the twilight) and was easy to come out of it. I could have taken a cab home by myself, but they require a responsible adult to take me home. I had some soreness that day and a bit the next day. Painkillers don't work too well on me. Even so, I think after my third one I even went back to work at my desk job the next day. After three surgeries, I have minor dimpling at the site of the scar. I also lost sensation on the nearby skin, which mostly returned eventually. So far, the lumpectomy was by far the easiest part of treatment! 

I hope this is helpful and puts your mind at ease. Of course, each person has a unique experience and it's important to remember that yours will be unique, too. Best of luck!

Dear MarieJune,

Thank you so very much for your kind and informative reply!  It is wonderful to be able to come to this site and get this kind of support.  

I especially appreciated what you said about your breast returning to "normal" after a lumpectomy.  My BS gave me hope for that, too, but it means even more to see confirmation that it can happen that way!  I'm about to turn 58 (Thursday), widowed, and living alone, but a lot of people, including my grown children, are lining up to help me, which is so wonderful!

Thanks so much for the prayers, Marie...mine are with you, too!

My very best to you,

Linda

MusicLady (Linda), 

You're welcome it's great to meet you & my thoughts and prayers will continue to be with you. The best advice is definitely to hear it firsthand from others who have been there- it truly helps to know the real outcomes. 

I'm so glad your family has volunteered to help you during this. I'm so proud of them for doing so. You've got a great support in front of you, which will come in handy. You're very fortunate. Don't hesitate to ASK when you need help from them, because they truly do want to help you, and with being a widow, they want to support you all the more to make themselves feel fulfilled. You won't burden them, just remember that- they WANT you to ask for them, and are very happy to be there for you. Don't overdo it afterwards and allow your body to heal. If you feel pain, you're overdoing it, ask for help. That's my best and most valuable advice.  

You've come to the right place and we're here for you. You can message me anytime you need to talk, laugh, cry, anything at all. I'm here for you and will help you through this. I wish you the best of luck with your lumpectomy. 

Many (((((hugs))))) from massachusetts 

Marie J Mello