MIDDLE-AGED WOMEN 40-60ish

If I had to have one off, I'd do both, too. So I did.

Stacia, welcome to this board, you will find a great group of women and good advice. I had two lumpectomies, one on each side, 11 years apart. After another biopsy which turned out to be negative, I decided to have a prophalactic mastectomy on both breasts. 2 years later I was diagnosed with my 3rd BC and am just finishing up radiation, you can have radiation more than once under the right circumstances, though not their first choice. It's true the risk is low after mastectomy, but not as low as we are led to believe, and I am a good example, but knowing what I know now I would still have done it. They do not do routine scans after BMX, my cautionary tale is, don't hesitate to ask for MRI's because it can come back, there are always microscopic cells that might be left behind. I don't say this to scare anyone, just to inform, I was so sure I was out of the woods, but here I am. It is such a personal decision, but I wish I  would have opted for Bilateral MX13 years ago, but I didn't  have a crystal ball. Best of luck with your decision. Hugs to you. Stephanie

Momine, I had stage 2 - it had progressed a ways before I went to see a dr. 

Have to apologize for offending people with my "freakish" remark. My personal opinion, and not meant to be directed at anyone but me. I know that some think it's vain to have recon, but for me it's a necessary step to being back to myself again. I don't want people to look at me and see "breast cancer survivor" - I am more than my disease. This is my way of getting past the trauma and the drama, to the point where this is not the first topic of conversation someone brings up when they see me. 

My oldest grandson (4 in September) and I have discussed this a number of times. My DD is soft, large-breasted like I was and he loves to cuddle on her. Probably on any female. Around the new year he sat back on me, then sat back up and pressed down on my chest. I told him NaNa didn't have any breasts because she had to have them taken off (didn't want to say "sick" or "cancer" to confuse him at his young age). We both agreed that NaNa's boobies were gone (his word, boobies, not mine!). When his Mom looked at him in surprise, he said "I know what boobies are, Mommy!"Then last week while we were visiting and he climbed up and sat back, he did it again - a sit up, turn around and a chest pat down!! 

elimar, thank you for your compassion! I am very uncomfortable and my pect muscles don't like to do much of anything strenuous these days.  Keep telling myself that it will soon be over ... And then the PS office calls to say the pre-op appt must be changed ... So I try not to stress and lose myself in a book quite often.  

KLJ:  if you look under the forum "financial issues"  (something like that)  there may be people over there who can direct you to helpful sources.

But it seems to be that having to primary relatives with BC that insurance would pay at least for mammo and US.  MD should appeal to them for that.  MRI may be trickier,,, would def have to do mammo and US first,,, and then petition to have MRI covered.  And if daugher 2 is not having any symptoms, and daughter 1 was 30,, she is only 25, why can't she nurse as long as she wants and then have the tests?  Maybe get 2nd opinion from another OB/GYN?

and heck,, ask MO for free advice.  It's your daughter!! Ask! If they don't answer, well, you tried.  Does Daughter 1 have same MO? Cuz if different, have her ask that one.

Congrats on new grandbaby!  Boy, girl??

edit:       look under the forum "employment, insurance and other financial"    someone over there may be able to help out.

Wow, thank you ladies! Such quick responses. Let's see if I can answer these questions in order!

Calico59, my oldest daughter was tested for the BRAC (?) and was found to be negative. Her ins. covered it, mine wouldn't.

Elimar, I'm not sure why the MRI was thrown into the mix. He could have just been thinking out loud. Her ins. is denying all of it due to her age however, her doctor is appealing it since the standard of care calls for a baseline to be done 5 years earlier than the diagnosis age of a sibling. Which would put her at exactly the right age.

Glennie19, Daughter 1 and I have different MO's. (different states). Her MO is looking for a study that may want to watch and test them both but so far nothing that is within a reasonable distance has come up. I already have my list of questions for my MO. You're right, if he doesn't answer me nothing lost, nothing gained New grandbaby is a boy! That makes 4 boys, which means I will probably never get that grand daughter! I will ask on the forum you suggested also! Thanks!

3littlebirds, thanks. I will ck the FORCE. I know that there is someone out there that can point us in the right direction. I know that she is not going to give up nursing at 6 months unless she is told that it could be life threatening for her not to be tested. My tumor only showed up on an MRI as well. I forced the issue with my doctor after they found "something" suspicious in my rt. breast. Turned out to be nothing but the MRI showed a tumor back near the chest wall on the left side that wouldn't have shown on a mammo for a long time.

Could be elimar! Adding that to my list of questions for next week! If anyone can think of anything else I should be asking throw it out there. She is going to my appt. with me so hopefully looking at that young face of a new mom will make him answer all of our questions! He is a nice man, just always in a hurry!

KLJ:  Seriously I think having a sister with BC at AGE 30 would be a HUGE red flag for putting younger daughter in high risk category.  I would definitely fight the insurance company on that. Not even mentioning that Mom has BC too,, again high risk category.

Congrats on 4th grandson.  Maybe there will be a girl in your future. My friend has two daughters.  One daughter had  4 girls before the boy,, the other one had 2 girls before the boy!  but they both finally got a boy.  LOL!!  Enjoy the new baby!!

Keep us posted!!! 

glennie19, I couldn't agree more! If one more person tells me that it doesn't matter because my older daughter and I have different kinds of cancer I think I will lose my mind. That's what they fight me with! Some rational right??? Unfortunately chemo put my oldest daughter into menopause. She had decided that she was done having kids when she was diagnosed and told her MO that. So a girl would be in the hands of my younger daughter and I guess that will depend on the outcome of any testing that we can get done! I just have to believe that it can't strike us again!

My sister and I had different types of breast cancer and nobody suggested they weren't related. She had ER+++, PR+, HER- and I had ER+,PR-. They didn't test my DCIS for HER. I have heard of people getting a recurrence with a different type. I can't believe anyone would tell you it didn't matter. It's maddening.

glennie19, oh how I wish I could. My goal is to just find a way for her to get tested and get some peace of mind. Lots to talk to my MO about next week! Have my pre-op with the PS for my exchange surgery on 9-2. Excited to get this step over with so I can give 100% to her. I won't take no for an answer!

Oh Elimar, that statement was not directed at you it was towards the insurance company! Every person I have talked to at my insurance company as well as hers has said that since our cancers were different it was not a cause for alarm. Please don't think that was meant for you I appreciate ALL of your input!