Starting chemo Sept 05

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  • txred9876
    txred9876 Member Posts: 392
    edited August 2006
    wonderful news Nicole!

    Good Luck with WW.

    Tina
  • AussieMum
    AussieMum Member Posts: 124
    edited August 2006
    Great news, Nicole!

    Sandra - how is Ben Joyce and family going?
  • sholroyd
    sholroyd Member Posts: 288
    edited August 2006
    Hi all

    Interesting reading about the hot flushes – they drive me mad. I have just added ‘Exefor’ on my list ready for when I see Oncologist in October.

    “What if” – I still find they come and give me a sharp kick from time to time but I quickly push them away and try and look forward always with a positive attitude.

    Ben Joyce has not seen much improvement yet and currently has a chest infection – still sending positive vibes his way.

    My handbag loss has been a very big inconvenience and the knock-on-effects have been very annoying, however I am not doing anger or anything like that, just dealing with what has to be dealt with.

    I am now more or less back into work part-time. I still get very tired and still do not sleep throughout the night which can be annoying – however I am a survivor and for that I am truly grateful.

    Herceptin tomorrow, oh the joys ;-).

    Maxine, how were the mamo results?

    Speak soon.

    Sandra from the UK.
  • tinkermax
    tinkermax Member Posts: 269
    edited August 2006
    Hi Sandra

    No mammos for me matey.........hehe.......no breasts!

    My doc was concerned originally about my CEA result...but upon further investigation...seems its not that high...and hasnt gone up...so its a wait and see scenario.

    Hugs to all

    Maxine
  • hopeful1
    hopeful1 Member Posts: 54
    edited August 2006
    Hello Ladies!

    Checking in to see how everyone is doing. My summer has been fun filled and hectic. I am so grateful that I was able to enjoy it with my new sense of normal. I tire more easily - but I was able to keep up with the kids and fit in more fun and travel than I thought would be possible. What a difference a year makes!

    Leanne - YAHOO! I was thrilled to read your posts and see the word NED! My thoughts and prayers are with you constantly.

    Brenda – I’m a little late with this – but welcome!

    To the rest of my September sisters – even though I am not addressing you individually – please know that you are always in my thoughts, especially those that are still going through treatments. Bless you all.

    Hopeful1
  • Pegk
    Pegk Member Posts: 389
    edited August 2006
    It has been 1 year since I started chemo. I know, I know, it's still August, but all my side effects started in September. What a year it has been! I actually went back to the beginning of the thread and read a little bit from those first anxiety filled weeks. I want you to know that I don't think I could have gotten through this year without you.

    Some of you, whose e-mail addresses I have, received my latest fundraising bulletin this morning on behalf of the Avon Walk for Breast Cancer in October.
    I am having my donors sign pink ribbons which I am stitching to a blouse with an interesting button. I will wear it the weekend of the walk.
    I have raised more than double the minimum requirement, so if any of you want to participate, send a donation to breastcancer.org.
    I have been trying to post a picture of my efforts, but my computer keeps freezing. (My husband has promised to do some maintenance. I'm afraid it's going to crash altogether)

    There is a picture that I posted last week on the "Walk, Run.." forum under fundraising.

    I hope all of you can face your coming "annniversaries" with hope and continued strength and health.

    And continue to come here for support and friendship.

    Love,
    Peggy
  • jpd
    jpd Member Posts: 26
    edited August 2006

    Peg...I love your pic...I have to ask....is that your natural color or are you coloring your hair? Mine came back in a LOT grayer than it was before...and I have a feeling once I color it, it won't take as well as it use to! I had to have a new drivers license picture taken last week...I think I look like my 80 year old mom! (and I just turned 50)...time to lose my license (once I color my hair, that is! lol!

  • Pegk
    Pegk Member Posts: 389
    edited August 2006
    Janet, surprisingly my hair is coming in darker than before. My avatar picture was taken in March.
    Here is the picture I was trying to post earlier of me in my ribbon blouse.
    image
    My hair is wavy (it's always been straight) and it's probably time for a haircut to tame it a bit, but I'm going to see family this weekend and I want to show off the longest length possible.
  • Pegk
    Pegk Member Posts: 389
    edited August 2006
    This is what I wanted to share with you earlier. I've done this embroidery for you, my dear September Sisters.
    image
    I sewed it over my heart (it's also my mastectomy side) and although it's not finished in the picture, you're all there on a ribbon. You'll all be with me in October.
    Love,
    Peggy
  • lynellb123
    lynellb123 Member Posts: 69
    edited August 2006

    Peggy I love love love your ribbons. I'm sitting here welling up with tears as I see all out September sister's names ready to walk with you. I am so proud of you for doing the walk! Maybe next year I'll walk with you, this year I've signed on to be a volunteer in Philadelphia, I might be able to get to NY to cheer you on. You are my hero& I am so proud to be your friend!

  • Liezel
    Liezel Member Posts: 192
    edited August 2006
    Peggy, I love your ribbons!! How amazing!! We'll all be with you!!

    With everybody having anniversaries, why don't we do a Roll Call and update everybody.

    Here goes:

    DX - 16AUG05
    Right Mas 07SEP05, Infiltrating Apocrine Carcinoma
    6.5cm Stage 3, Grade 3. 2/2 LymphNodes, er/pr- Her2/Neu +++
    23SEP05 - Start Chemo 4 x FEC, 4 X Taxotere
    23FEB06 - Last Taxotere
    10MAR06 - Excission of Right Axilla 0/13
    11APR06 - 36 x Rads, start Herceptin
    15JUN06 - Final Rad
    10AUG06 - Annual Mammo Left Breast. Clear. NED NED NED

    Love,

    Liezel
  • foxxf
    foxxf Member Posts: 171
    edited August 2006
    Peg- you are such a thoughtful person and we are all blessed to have you as our sister.I too was brought to tears at your beautiful ribbons.

    I am going to the relay for life in two weeks and would love follow your lead, what an amazing woman.

    love to all
    Nicole
  • foxxf
    foxxf Member Posts: 171
    edited August 2006
    Sandra,

    Thanks for the postcards they were great, My kids were very excited.

    Don't forget anyone who would like to send/recieve a postcard PM me with your address and I will send one.

    Thanks
    Nicole
  • AussieMum
    AussieMum Member Posts: 124
    edited September 2006
    It is hard to see through the tears in my eyes.
    How beautiful, Peggy!

    You continue to be such a faithful friend to all of us.
    God bless
  • Naniam
    Naniam Member Posts: 1,766
    edited September 2006
    Peg, I love your ribbon blouse!!!!!

    As most of you know, I didn't come to join until after my treatments. I have just reached my first anniversary from diagnosis. I was sailing along pretty smoothly and then all of a sudden I have really gotten into this funk. I haven't been sleeping - miss that estrogen- and has worn me down emotionally, mentally and physically.

    Maybe some of you gals can give me real swift kick in the rear and bring me back to the present. Here goes: We never got clean edges and by the time I got to the Medical Center to see the surgeon and then the oncologist, the oncologist said I was at the end of the time period that was felt chemo would be effective. I had my port insertion the next day and my first AC treatment that next Monday. I know that while my nodes were negative, the tumor had invaded the lymph and vascular structures of the breast. When I mentioned this to the oncologist on my last visit months ago, he was very surprised and said he didn't know that. Me, I am sitting there thinking Holy S-----!!!! So here comes my anniversary and I can't get my attitude back in shape. Did you guys experience any of this? Am I having Post whatever syndrome here?

    After the happy thoughts on the thread, I hated to bring up a downer but I don't understand why all of a sudden I am not coping well - this isn't my normal me.

    Any thoughts would be most appreciated. I know you don't know me well but ------/ I have been told over and over that I had early stage BC and the "good kind" IDC with DCIS Stage II, Grade II, no nodes, ER/PR+. HER2- The kind they like to see- and no I don't have a reason to feel this way
    especially when others have more aggressive forms.

    Well, not I have just said it and got it out of my system -all of a sudden the not clean edges and the invasion of the lymph and blood vessels is worrying me. Before in treatment I didn't think about those things. Help.

    Brenda
  • Jennywren130
    Jennywren130 Member Posts: 1
    edited September 2006
    Hi,

    I decided to have my head shaved before I started my chemo (Feb 2006). I had long hair, so thought it best to dive straight in!! The hairpiece I got was great, and very easy to manage.

    I had 4 cycles of Epirubicin, then 20 sessions of radiotherapy, and a further 4 cycles of CMF. I had my last one on Monday (28th). I see my Oncologist on the 19th to see how things have gone. Feels like I'd been on a treadmill this last 9 months, and now it feels like I've been cast adrift! Still, I got there in the end

    Kind regards to everyone.

    Kathy
  • foxxf
    foxxf Member Posts: 171
    edited September 2006
    Brenda,

    maybe you could talk to the nurses at the oncology unit to get a referal for a counciler (sp) the only thing I can offer is I try not to think about it or it will be the only thing you can think about.

    The possibility of it coming back is something we all live with but I for one will not let it rule my life. This thing has taken 12 months from me and I won't let it take any more.

    Hope this helps
    Nicole
  • Naniam
    Naniam Member Posts: 1,766
    edited September 2006

    Nicole, thanks. They would be very surprised to get that type call from me but if some sleep this weekend doesn't help I am not to proud to say something.

  • foxxf
    foxxf Member Posts: 171
    edited September 2006
    It is a very sad day here in Australia with the death of a truly great Australian, Steve Irwin - The Crocodile Hunter.

    Everyone is shocked and saddend at his death, I feel most of all for his beautiful Daughter Binidi. Steve was such a family man he will be missed by many all around the world.

    Nicole
  • leannem
    leannem Member Posts: 137
    edited September 2006
    Hi all

    It is indeed such a sad day here in Australia with the loss of Steven Irwin (or Steven Zirwin as my son calls him). I admit I shed a tear at the news. Just such a shock.

    I too keep thinking about his young family and how horrific it is for them.

    love
    Leanne
    xoxo
  • hopeful1
    hopeful1 Member Posts: 54
    edited September 2006
    Brenda – I had those same feelings before my last oncologist visit. I couldn’t understand why I was more fearful now than I was a year ago. I had 1.5 cm IDC, grade 1, stage 1, er+/pr+, her2-, no nodes. I did get clear margins from my lumpectomy – but it took 3 tries. The nurses at the breast center were wonderful – and got me through my treatment with the same sort of things that you were told. I had an excellent prognosis – and I made it through with very few problems. My docs didn’t order and type of scans because they didn’t think I needed them. They were very confident that I was stage 1 and that I didn’t have to worry about any further progression. A year ago – I took comfort in that and didn’t think much about it. Now I can’t seem to stop wondering if I should request the scans just to make sure. I talked to my oncologist about my fears. Yes – my tumor was grade 1 – slow growing. That should be a good thing – but my thought process jumped to “well if it is slow growing – that means that it has been there a LONG time – which means maybe it had already spread to other places …”. Because I didn’t have the scans – every ache or pain I have makes me wonder if it has spread. He told me that these fears are very “normal”. Apparently the timing is normal as well. He told me that many people have this same anxiety as their anniversaries roll around. He tried to assure me that since I was very aggressive with my treatment – I didn’t have to worry about progression. I still wonder if I’ve done enough. I still have my ovaries – and recently I seem to be consumed with the fear of ovarian cancer. All of my doctors felt that having them removed was overkill – but I just don’t know. He did tell me to think about the scans – and if I want them – he’ll order them. I’m still on the fence on that one.

    On a lighter note: When I walked into his office for my last visit – I had this wave of nausea come over me just from the memories of my chemo visits there. I told him about it and his comment made me laugh out loud: “Don’t feel bad – I’ve had women throw up when they see me at the mall.”

    Sorry for the long post. I just wanted to let you know that you are not alone in these fears. I’m sure most of us have them even though we might be afraid to voice them – for reasons that I can’t explain.

    So consider this a swift kick for both of us! We have some sisters on this board who have been through much worse than I can even imagine. I'm going to focus on the positive and try to realize that I am one of the 'lucky' ones.

    Bless you all!
  • susan_02143
    susan_02143 Member Posts: 7,209
    edited September 2006
    Hi all....

    Peg, the ribbons are so beatiful. How wonderful that we are with you!

    End of summer is slipping in here. I have long sleeves on today, and the nights are getting cool enough for a light blanket. The kid is back at school, just as enthusiastic as last year, but this year she isn't filled with fear. My husband starts his commute to teach at the private school next week, and my clients seem to think it is time to get serious.

    Reading through your posts, I realize that I am experiencing something different. I am not fearful of recurrance or mets, though, I would prefer not to have either. I just plain feel run-over emotionally. Not enough to get in the way professionally, but probably enough to get in the way of being 100% healthy again.

    The aromasin continues to give me new side effects regularly. Such fun guessing what the next one will be! Right now, insomnia is working its way into my life. Fall asleep and am totally awake in 4 hrs. This morning I finally said, "The h*ll with it, got up and read the papers and drank coffee." I can't remember the last time I had to wait for the paper to arrive!

    Have a new server coming tomorrow, and then a major installation that we will test over a WAN connection. Wish me well.... these guys have given me large sums of money for this project.

    All for now,

    *susan*
  • Pegk
    Pegk Member Posts: 389
    edited September 2006
    I, too, was shocked and saddened to hear of the sudden death of Steve Irwin. There were tributes to him last night on many cable stations. What an extraordinary life cut short too soon.

    As for anniversary recurrence jitters...yup, I've got them, but I think my training and fundraising efforts have blunted and probably delayed their impact for the time being. After next month, I think it will be a real effort to try to be "normal" again.
    Another step in that direction... I'm finally getting my port removed on Thursday. I've been feeling it as a dull ache for several weeks. It did it's job and I'll be relieved to get rid of it.

    Susan, I'm sorry to hear about your unpredictable side effects with aromasin. I've been taking arimidex since January. The side effects aren't horrible, just chronic. I feel achy and sluggish when I get up in the morning and whenever I'm sitting still for any length of time. Another reason to keep walking!

    Good luck with your new project!

    Funny story Hopeful!

    Peggy
  • leannem
    leannem Member Posts: 137
    edited September 2006
    Hello lovely ladies!

    Just a quick hello as I have to dash and pick up the boys for kindy very soon...

    Well we are in the new house and off to Fiji on Monday! Yikes! Scott has been away since we moved in here so he hasn't even slept a night here yet. I am naturally completely exhausted and my affected arm is giving me a little grief from all the lifting/unpacking all generally all the things we aren't supposed to do but sometimes have no choice BUT to do! Must try and slow down I suppose!

    Very much looking forward to the holiday- 10 nights/11 days of Fiji.....ahhh...

    Well speaking of side effects, my zoladex has well and truly turned me into a raving lunatic! Yes I know i have that tendency anyway but really!!!! The hot flashes, insomnia, crazy, manic mood swings. Gosh it is a mad house here more than ever. I am totally addicted to temaze (I would like to shoot whoever said they are not addictive) and forgot to pack them when we stayed over night at a hotel before moving and got a grand total of 3 hours sleep all night. Complete with pacing the floors and shaking like a leaf..... Must address that one with the onc. Either that or get some more prescriptions!!

    As for the recurrence fears- yep I know those!! Mine is the "3 strikes your out" type- I don't know anyone who has survived 3 recurrances and I am terrified that since I am already up to number 2 after a year....... it is always there and I have no idea how to get rid of it. Mind you I am feeling healthy (ish!) albeit damn tired and slightly manic but otherwise great! I feel like a naughty truanting school girl since I haven't had to see my onc in 6 weeks (!!!) and haven't had an infusion of anything for 3. Off for the herceptin on Friday. Seems like a holiday in itself not being in the hospital!

    Okay have to run but just wanted to check in with you all
    xoxoxo
  • Liezel
    Liezel Member Posts: 192
    edited September 2006
    Leanne, gosh, so much on your plate. Good Luck, and enjoy your holiday. You have just made up my mind for me on the Zoladex. My onc really wants me to go onto it, but I have been refusing. Think I'll stick to my guns on this one...

    I am going through the same recurrence fears. Saw my onc on Friday, and she insisted on Colonoscopy, Bone scan and CT Scan. Had the Colonoscopy yesterday. How weird. They give you drugs so that you can't remember anything. It worked so well, I can't remember being driven home afterwards or much of last night. This morning is also a blur. I dressed my son for summer, and it just started raining! I phoned his school and asked them to change him into something warmer. They must think I have lost it!

    Anyway, all seems fine, but waiting for biopsy results. I am having nightmares of bugs crawling in my stomach. The other scans are on Tuesday. Seeing onc afterwards.

    Feeling very emotional today. Maybe still a delayed reaction from the drugs. All I want to do is crawl into bed and sleep... Might just do that later...

    So sad about Steve Irwin. His poor family! Like I said to my husband, he went doing what he loved, and was passionate about. Absolutely the best way to go. He probably did not even realise what happened. I wouldn't mind going that way. I'll probably be lying on a deck chair on the beach with a Jodi Picoult book and lots of chocolate wrappers around me, my son playing around me and DH fishing a few feet away. Now that is heaven to me....
  • linny
    linny Member Posts: 204
    edited September 2006
    Brenda,
    I have also had a great deal of fear occupying my mind, especially at night I have been having trouble sleeping. I spoke to a psychiatrist at the hospital (they have a psycosocial department) and asked her if I have post traumatic stress disorder. She said no, that is when someone goes through a traumatic event (for example, rape, or violence) and has trouble dealing with it after the event. In my case (and she said this is common with many cancer patients) it is "stress response syndrome" - dealing with an ongoing threat and the anxiety that causes. She recommended anti-anxiety meds, but I do not want to take anything, since I am functioning well and keeping busy, I just hate the fear. Other bc survivors have told me it takes time.

    Linda
  • Naniam
    Naniam Member Posts: 1,766
    edited September 2006

    Thanks. This has been a better week. I have been able to sleep at nights (I can't sleep and then I sleep - think that is menopause) so has helped me mentally and emotionally.

  • leannem
    leannem Member Posts: 137
    edited September 2006
    Hiagain!

    My internet is down at home and I am in with Scott at his work so thought I would quickly log on and see what is going on. Yep I'm addicted! (Add that to the list lol).

    Just quickly- Liezel- don't be put off by the zoladex. For me, the side effects are NOTHING compared to the fear I have of estrogen pumping around my body 'feeding' the cancer, or in my case, the mets. I feel soooo much better mentally for being on it (as in less fear/I think of it as added protection now I am not on chemo)it is amazing and to be honest, I STILL fear that maybe a little bit of hormone is around and am pushing my onc for an AI to go with it!! Apparently there is another drug you can throw in the mix to add with the side effects when doing zoladex + AI which naturally I can't remember the name of but have written down at home to speak to my onc about... I would prefer an ooph all together and am pushing for that at the beginning of next year once life settles back down a little. The only thing not rushing me into it is I have found little evidence suggesting an ooph is necessarily that superior to ovarian suppression via zoladex so am saving myself the surgery!

    Anyway, I just wanted to say sorry that I put you off the zoladex and that I was also just in a whingy mood!

    Gotta go
    Love
    Leanne
  • jpd
    jpd Member Posts: 26
    edited September 2006

    Greetings everyone. Yes, it's been a little over a year since all of this started...and I too worry. I just had my three month checkup yesterday and all the blood work was good. My onc uses markers to help monitor everything and doesn't really believe in scans unless something appears to be out of wack. I had a MRI a few months ago on my remaining breast and everything looked good. I wonder, however, how they can really check the chest wall where I had my mastectomy...I would think a chance for a reoccur would be greater there. Oh, well. I will have another bone density test in December, since I'm on Femara and will also have more blood work. Sleep is also and issue with me...but only because I have a year old dog who thinks it's breakfast time between 4:30 and 5 a.m.!!! lol!! Silly dog! Well, I need to grab a bite to eat and get back to work. I do feel a sense that I need to be doing more to help myself...diet and exercise wise...but it's hard! Talk soon. Janet

  • susan_02143
    susan_02143 Member Posts: 7,209
    edited September 2006
    Hi all....

    Today, a year ago, I began my chemo. Such an odd thing to look back. I celebrated with my annual physical, and a two mile walk around Boston. I live just a mile from the ocean, but rarely actually see it! Today was sunny and bright. There were tourists everywhere, staring at maps and trying to figure out the subways system. Office workers poured out of buildings at noon and benches were filled with these workers eating their lunches.

    Physical went well enough. Blood pressure continues to respond to aromasin by increasing, so we need to increase the dosage. It is always something!

    We are all looking at these anniversaries this month. As I gazed over the ocean, admiring the birds and islands, I thought of all of you. What a year we have had!

    *susan*

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