Starting Chemo in April 2014

Foorballnut - what you're describing still sounds wrong to me. You should NOT be in this much pain. My first round of Taxotere, I had the kind of pain you're describing, but only for a  couple of days. Even so, after my WBCs tanked, and I ended up in the hospital, my MO and I talked about it and he said that pain THAT severe suggests an allergic reaction. We added daily Claritin to my cocktail and things are much better now. HOWEVER, if things had NOT improved, we would have replaced the Taxotere with something else. I'm just wondering why your team isn't more concerned about this. Have you spoken to your MO personally? I would push for this. Some of the nurses I have dealt with have been WONDERFUL, and others pat me on the head, say "That's normal. Sorry." and tell me to suck it up. My MO, on the other hand, always tells me that severe symptoms are NOT "NORMAL" and can, and SHOULD, always be dealt with. I dunno, maybe my MO just goes above and beyond. But I'm worried for you.

Swissmiss - regarding the port? What EverForward said.  At first I was horrified that I had to keep the thing so long, but being in the Chemo Lounge, and witnessing so many poor women whose veins are damaged, I am thankful for it. For one lady, it took 3 nurses and five tries to get an IV in. This poor woman was in so much pain, and she still had several rounds of chemo to go. Poor thing.

My pants have reached an all-new level of TIGHTNESS today. Super annoying. Carbs really settle the stomach, so I consume WAY too many of those, and I can't even exercise because too much exertion (as in, doing more than walking from the couch to bathroom) leaves me short of breath and nauseated. No one tells you going into this that chemo AGES you. When this is all over- I have it marked on the calendar - I have a date with my running shoes. We are gonna have ourselves a GOOD TIME.

Timbuktu - It's true - there are no guarantees about recurrence. But you CAN NOT let your Sweet Self go there. I was told that by going through chemo and Herceptin, I reduce my risk of recurrence to 2-3%. Which sounds great, but still a little scary. I mean, I just turned 39 - I have years and years left for that recurrence to happen. So YIKES, really? That HIGH?  But you know what I heard on the radio not long ago? An ad for the Alberta Cancer Society, stating that ONE in FOUR people will be told they have cancer this year. ONE IN FOUR. That's INSANE. But it also means that my 2-3% isn't really so bad. Basically, chemo and Herceptin will give me the same (or perhaps better?) odds as EVERYONE ELSE in the general population. 

Ladies, you all HANG IN THERE. There is an end coming. We're ALMOST there. And then we'll look back and be like "YEAH. I did that. I'm a ROCK STAR."

I'm thinking I need to buy me a CROWN.

Footballnut, have you asked your doc about a different pain med instead of Percocet? There has to be something out there that is easier on your system.  You shouldn't have to suffer so much.  Or maybe ask if you can go to low dose taxol weekly for a period of time to get your taxane allotment.  My MO moved me off of Taxotere to taxol because of the SE's.  Just a thought.

Timbuktu, must be the weather.  I, too, am down.  Highly anxious is more like it as I have an appointment with the chair this afternoon.  No clue why it is hitting me so hard except on weekly it is tough to get mentally prepared like I did going every 2-3 weeks. 

Wishing everyone a mentally good week.

Good morning, all.  I read many of your posts with empathy - it seems this whole process cycles us though so much anxiety, fear, pain, and emotional ups and downs.  

I don't know if this will help, but I am almost two weeks past my final tx.  Finally starting to feel decent - taste buds coming back, minimal gastro discomfort, and enough energy to do the dishes and walk the dogs.  I'm sure I will have some issues, but for the first time, I feel hopeful there might be a light at the end of the tunnel.  It won't be a disco light, but even a 60-Watt bulb will be an improvement.

As for the dark thoughts about what the future might bring, I slap myself upside the head and say there's no since worrying about what hasn't happened yet.  Still - it isn't easy.

Sending you a hug for your next infusion, Timbuktu.  You've wrestled with the decision to continue, and it definitely sounds like this is the right decision for you.  You are strong, to be going through this the second time - even if you may not always feel that way.

EverForward: I bet if you call the company and describe your situation and offer to prove it, they'll wave any late fees. Those are such a hassle. I have been really struggling to be organized about these things. I never used to have to write anything down. That is not the case now!!

Sharonde: thank you for the positive message. I have two more taxol treatments and I'll be on the other side too. I cannot wait. I'm trying to do 'warrior' not 'quitter', I was very close. I guess we all have to really take things day by day. 

Timbuktu: I'm doing the Taxol 12 weeks for like a 5% increase in the overall reduction of recurrence. 5% is 5%. If I would have known before BC "do x thing and you'll reduce your risk by 5%" I would have done that. No regrets this way. I'm doing everything possible and will have to remember what SharonDe said about slapping myself if I start to think negatively. Day by day!!!

I managed to get a half day of work in today, in between running home with bouts of D.  I'm still running hot and cold and feeling very foggy.  I saw my breast surgeon for a follow up today and told her I was feeling like maybe 5 treatments were enough and that I think the 6th might be detrimental to my health.  We both agreed that I was probably more feeling overwhelmed at this point, than the chemo really hurting me.  She said they could postpone my 6th by a week if I wanted some time to recuperate mentally and physically... HELL NO, if I'm going to have to have it, let's do it on schedule! She also said there is a 4 week break between chemo and radiation so I'm pretty glad about that. 

Thanks for the feedback on the genetic testing costs.  My surgeon put the paperwork in for me today because I definitely want to go forward with that.  My mom is a colon cancer survivor and there is a link btwn breast/colon cancer genetically.  I have two daughters who need to know if there is a genetic factor at work here.

Football, everyone is different.  I was freaking out about the tamoxifen too when I found out I will need it, but the more people I talked to I see that it's individual.  Some people have absolutely no problem with it.  Plus, it's in the future - don't worry about that right now.  You are a warrior and you just fight what's in front of you today.  Focus on that Jets game (even though I'm a Giants fan, lol) and of course you'll be working out and playing guitar before long.  Right now sucks but I promise it won't always suck!!! Hang tough, girl!!!

Thursday I meet with the oncologist.  I'll let y'all know any interesting info I come away with.  In the meantime, I have to set up an MRI on my right breast before radiation starts... and that's about it for now.  Can't believe only two weeks til my last infusion.... Thank God.

Sharon - It's great to hear that things are looking up for you.  Must be great to know you are finished with chemo!  I sure hope you see that disco ball soon!

Cold - I hear ya on the tight pants!  Haven't worn my jeans in months.  Wearing my stretchy pants all the time now.  My waist has expanded, but I also can't stand anything uncomfortable.  Love the idea of a crown!  

Timbuktu - I'm sorry you are dealing with so many issues.  My MO gave me stats when I first saw him.  My DH wasn't impressed with the numbers, but when you look at the possibility that you could be one of those few extra women that are helped-it makes a difference.  We gotta take whatever we can get to see us through this!  

Going for Taxol # 5 tomorrow.  This last week was my toughest.  Fatigue has really set in and one my fingernails are getting purple spots on them.  A little tingling, but not too bad yet.  Hoping neuropathy doesn't set in.

Wishing you all a better week!  Hugs, lilyrose

Mscaruso - We get it.  Hearing any negative news can send us into a tailspin.  It sucks that you found out your status in a random email.  I know I would be a wreck if that happened to me.  Hang in there!

Football - I truly hope you are feeling better.  You NEED a break!

Longisland - I had trouble getting my insurance to pay for my BRCA testing.  Was turned down because of my age.  My MO tried a different, cheaper company, and that was accepted.  I too, wanted to know.  Mostly for my kids sake.

I was sitting here feeling down about my situation...had to get up and use the bathroom...looked at myself in the mirror while I was washing my hands and totally cracked up!  I suddenly realized that I look like Uncle Fester from the Addams Family!  So I said maybe I should stick a lightbulb in my mouth and take my grand kids trick or treating early!  

Hope you all have a better week!  Hugs,  lilyrose

football it taxoterrible is a mind game. You feel bad okay really horrible and you just feel like how can you continue. I had Taxotere with carbo last time and I was miserable non stop. I will tell you that once you are done it will go away. You will feel better and alive again. You will feel like exercising, playing your guitar and just getting out and back to life. Yes you will have fear but try please try to live. 

Lena-Lou that is awesome that we are so close. Taxol IMO is much kinder and easier to take. As far as rads what type of recon are you looking at ??  I have done implants and free flap so I have some experience with both. I will have rads this time and may need a revision afterwards. 

Good one, Cold.  There is also one with Jennifer Lopez that is funny.  (Obviously, I am awake tonight, and not being very productive, but enjoying catching up on the boards.)

With you on the steroids mmta! Up to 1 am... slept to 230.. awake until 430 and awake an hour and a half later.   No meeting for me though, hope you get through ok!

Loved the tight pants Cold.  Sharon, I have to find Jlo one !  I am purposely avoiding pants and sticking to flowing maxi dresses/skirts and my pregnancy clothes...what!? I need to go buy some clothes that fit!

In the chair for Taxol #6 today!   Half way!   And my twin brother is here from 10 hours away so he's taking me.   It's funny that I'm excited to show off my Cancer Centre and nurses.

Well wishes to all in the dark place, esp you Football, I am off to water my garden before the heat hits!  How 

 Bonus to the weight gain

Ha ha ha ha ha! Good one clarrn! And congrats on reaching the HALF-WAY point! Yay!

Here's the JLo one - super funny:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MLUvOtqTmYM

I'm been tossing around the idea of buying new pants, but I feel like it's sort of admitting defeat, you know? Like I'm conceding that these extra pounds are a permanent Chemo Present. And YET, I suppose I really can't continue walking around in Yoga pants ALL THE TIME. 

Dressing it up has become a comedy routine - Uni-Boob, Bald, missing half my eyebrows and 2/3 of my eyelashes, puffy face, and TIGHT PANTS. Although I WOULD like to thank Jimmy Fallon for giving me a theme song.

Stretch pants!

Linda, this is day 8 after infusion 4 for me too.  I could have written your post!

At least you are not alone.

BTW I'm on Taxol and carboplatin too.  the stats under my name are from my bc treatment, 3 years ago.