Just diagnosed cancer back waiting for scan, scared to death.

yinghuoxie
yinghuoxie Member Posts: 6
edited June 2014 in Just Diagnosed With a Recurrence or Metastasis

I know I will not be alone here and I do want to talk to somebody. I was dx stage 2 BC at Dec 2010 and went through mastectomy plus chemo+hercepton. The implant was put inside the same time day with the mastectomy. I was strong and happy and changed my lifestyle a lot afterwards. Everything was fine until Feb when I went to a routine MRI. They found a 0.7cm findings near the implant. 10 days later I went to ultrasound and nothing wrong. At May I did mammogram with implant and second ultrasound. This time they saw it and did biopsy. The doctors said the possibility of cancer is extremely low but I just won the lottery this time. The doctor needs time figuring out if this is recurrence or a new cancer. Bone scan and CT scan will be at this week and I am scared to death now. I am at age of 41 now with two boys 6 and 9 years old. I cannot imagine their lives without me around. I have the most wonderful husband who can give me anything I want and I have all my friends supporting me. It is just myself who cannot face the fear of death. I was at one moment so brave and even thinking of living with my little cancer peacefully, while at next moment cried and depressed hopelessly. Any of your experience or words will be highly appreciated. I just want to get through this faster and smoothly. Thanks. 

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  • edwards750
    edwards750 Member Posts: 3,761
    edited June 2014

    ying - so sorry you are facing another medical scare. You don't know anything for sure yet do try and be calm. K know hard to do but you can do it plus you have 2 boys to keep you busy and distracted, 

    There are a few women who have had recurrences and posted on this forum. A friend if s friend is going through the same thing but hers has been confirmed- yours has not. 

    Nothing we can say will allay your fears - only the dr can do that just know you are in our thoughts and prayers. So keep the faith and keep us posted. 

    Diane 

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  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited June 2014

    Dear, yinghuoxie, Welcome to the BCO community. We are so sorry that you are dealing with the possibility of recurrence or a new cancer. We know that other members on these boards can share their own experiences with compassion and empathy. Please keep us posted and let us know how you continue to do. We are sending you warm wishes. The Mods

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  • yinghuoxie
    yinghuoxie Member Posts: 6
    edited June 2014

    Thanks all for your words. I just got the preliminary report that this IS cancer but nothing else known yet. I will try to calm and do whatever I can to cooperate with doctors.

    Ying

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  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited June 2014

    Dear Ying the waiting is the worst part but you know that already from your previous experience. At least you have a supportive husband and friends with children to keep your mind busy with other things. Nothing we can say can keep you always calm, just know that we and lots of people on BCO are wishing the best for you. As is said on this forum, "we are in your pocket" whenever you go for tests, supporting you and trying to keep you calm. Please keep the people here informed of your progress. All our best.

    The Mods

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  • yinghuoxie
    yinghuoxie Member Posts: 6
    edited June 2014

    Thank you thank you and thank you. I know I am not alone here. Will update my progress as I get it later.

    Ying

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  • BabyRuth
    BabyRuth Member Posts: 264
    edited June 2014

    ying-I am so sorry you are going through this again.  I have been exactly where you are now and it can be so difficult.  I was stage 2 also and recurred right  after I passed the 3 year mark. Try not to let your mind race ahead with all your fears.  Once you get the complete pathology report you will know more about the options you have for treatment.  Remember that you have fought this battle before and won and you can do it again.  You have a supportive family and friends and all of us here to help you.  I will be keeping you in my prayers as you go through your scans this week.  Please keep us updated as you get test results back.

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  • voicewriter
    voicewriter Member Posts: 51
    edited June 2014

    Ying, so very sorry that you're in this boat again.  I am actually waiting for results from a fine needle biopsy that I had the other day.  I also had a mastectomy three and a half years ago.  I had DCIS, so the thought of recurrence was far from my mind, as it is from all of our minds.  But thinking of you, and know that you are strong.  You got through this before, and you will again.  We are all in this together, and here for you. 

    Hugs, and keep us posted. 

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  • Jujube43
    Jujube43 Member Posts: 178
    edited June 2014

    I had a Pet scan a week ago. I finished rads on May 9th after having had 5 months of chemo and a unilateral mastectomy. I was hoping for NED ststus and about to begin hormone therapy.  Pet showed something to be concerned about. My MO has ordered a bone scan and a guided needle biopsy. If it is cancer I'll begin palliative treatment. He also said it would be considered an early recurrence. I am terrified...

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  • yinghuoxie
    yinghuoxie Member Posts: 6
    edited June 2014

    Updated here with good news that both CT and bone scans turned out negative. I am now breathing back the hope for the future. The doctor said it could be the previous mastectomy did not clean enough and I need a surgery again plus radiation. The tamoxifen might be changed to another medicine. They are still in the process figuring out if this is recurrence or a new cancer. The chemo is the problem now and I am wondering if mammaprint test or oncotype dx test can help me make the decision. Anyone had any experience or suggestion?

    Anyway today is a big day and I survived it. For those who are suffering the similar difficulties please don’t lose your hope. We can always pray for the best outcome. You are NOT alone and we are all trying our best. Today my doctor told me she had a good feeling of me that I will see my kids growing up and see their marriage. I hope I can and if I can pray for it, you can,too!

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  • edwards750
    edwards750 Member Posts: 3,761
    edited June 2014

    You guys are going through what ALL of us fear happening - a recurrence. No one has any guarantees - even early stagers which I am too by the way. I was told by my radiologist that I can feel optimistic because of my low Oncotype score and non-aggressive cancer and I do somewhat but I bet there are some now Stage IV ladies who felt the same way at one time. 

    It is a virtual crapshoot. I am 3 1/2 years out from my DX. Supposedly IF you make it to the 5 year mark then...but we all know people who have been survivors for many years and it comes back. We try not to dwell on that at least not often. 

    Good luck and hoping and praying for all of you. 

    Diane

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  • BabyRuth
    BabyRuth Member Posts: 264
    edited June 2014

    ying-that is such great news!  I am so happy  that your scans came back clear.  My bet is that your cancer is a recurrence and not a new one.  When will your complete pathology report be back? 

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  • yinghuoxie
    yinghuoxie Member Posts: 6
    edited June 2014

    I contacted my previous oncologist (We moved last year) and she is a very knowledgeable researcher as well. She is pretty straight forward and told me that the chest wall recur most likely means a tip of the iceberg of distant recur within a year. I am scared now. Is anybody experiencing the chest wall recur but succeeded with long survival? I do need some good news to get myself hopeful again. Thanks.

    Ying

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  • yinghuoxie
    yinghuoxie Member Posts: 6
    edited June 2014

    Hi sisters I calm down now. Life is short but hope is always there. If we don't give up ourselves then no one can. When you feel all hope is gone then calm down and you will find the hero inside you.

    Ying

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