dad thank you

rozem
rozem Member Posts: 1,375
edited June 2014 in Who or What Inspires You?

I needed a place to write and I thought this may be helpful to others struggling with a loss of a loved one who helped them through their BC journey

my dad, my best friend passed away a few days ago. I am completely and utterly devastated and feel like my heart has been ripped in two.  I loved him dearly and we had an amazing relationship.  I feel like I lost a piece of myself the day he died

When I was diagnosed he cried many many tears for me and told me many times that he wished it was him and not me suffering.  He and my mom nursed me the entire 4 months of chemo - every day all day.  I was so sick from chemo and most food was repulsive to me but every day he would ask if I wanted something in particular and made it for me or ran around looking for whatever I needed or helped my mom prepare it.  He helped my mom fold laundry and clean up, picked up my kids - all the regular stuff you cant do

but the most important thing he did was hold my hand and tell me everything was going to be ok,  and somehow, because he said with such love and conviction,  he was the only one I believed

so to my dad, my hero, my rock THANK YOU for being here long enough to see me though this

rest in peace dear sweet papa

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  • TB90
    TB90 Member Posts: 992
    edited March 2014

    Rozem:  You have one of the best gifts that life has to offer.  The most amazing and wonderful father and now all the memories and gifts that he gave you that you will have forever.  My father died 20+ years ago and when I was originally dx, I found myself needing him like he had never left.  I know you are broken-hearted right now, but it does get easier and he will always be with you. 

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  • AZ85048
    AZ85048 Member Posts: 2,613
    edited March 2014

    rozem - I'm so very sorry.  My deepest sympathies to you on the loss of your father and my sincerest condolences to all of those who loved him.  My father died when I was a teenager and even though that was over forty years ago, I can still feel his presence and know he's with me every day.  Your grief is raw, but eventually as TB90 said, it gets easier and you'll find yourself smiling or laughing over some memory of him.  He gave you life, he gave you hope, he made you the person you are today, and he loved you very much.  Rejoice that you had him as long as you did... he must have been a wonderful man.  Peace to you....

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  • Mayanne
    Mayanne Member Posts: 108
    edited March 2014

    Rozem,

    I am so sorry for your loss of your dear Dad.  As hard as it is right now while your mind is still grappling with comprehension that his physical presence is gone, as TB90 and AZ have said, it gets easier as time goes by.  I've sensed my Dad near although he's been gone for 20 years.  Memories of his philosophy and humor remain with me throughout each day of my life.  Thank you for sharing your tribute to your Dad, Rozem.  I'm sure that your Dad is with you in spirit, treasuring your love for him. 

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  • rozem
    rozem Member Posts: 1,375
    edited March 2014

    thank you so much lovely,  beautiful ladies for your words of comfort...I am crying as I read your posts.  Your words, especially that your dads are still with you in spirit, make me feel so much better during this dark time.  Right now I cant see past the grief but your experience gives me hope that I will be able to deal with this, have beautiful memories and rejoice in the fact that I was so lucky to have him

    you guys are just the best.

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  • rozem
    rozem Member Posts: 1,375
    edited June 2014

    missing my dad today....happy fathers day to all the wonderful dads, husbands and grandfathers!

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