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Morwenna
Morwenna Member Posts: 1,063
edited June 2014 in Not Diagnosed With a Recurrence or Metastases but Concerned

One minute I'm OK, next I have a heavy weight on my chest which makes it hard to breathe. Truly it doesn't help that I've been on and off this site all day as my DH is at work, so I'm home alone!

It's too cold to go out, -28 centigrade, about -40 with wind chill this morning! and my son went off with my car, so I can't even drive somewhere. 

I've worked out on the treadmill, watched a movie, recorded a couple of songs today, but still I'm back here, fretting!

Thing is, a week ago I discovered a little hard nodule, probably smaller than a pea, along my mastectomy scar line. Doctor said she didn't think it was cancer, but sent me for an ultrasound (to be sure). Radiologist said he didn't think it was cancer, but only way to be certain is a biopsy, set for March 12. 

I know I should hang onto the fact that both doctors were encouraging, and a lot of the time I'm OK, then this heavy weight hits me again ..... any words of wisdom from somebody who's been there, done that???? I can't stop feeling for the bloody thing. I'm starting to think I feel lots of them now!!! 

Beam me up, Scotty! 

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited March 2014

    Hi Morwenna, I know the feeling when we got to the "dark place" with scares like this.  Try to find comfort in the u.s. report and try to tell yourself a different story each time you think about this and what could happen: the likelihood of it NOT being cancer could be much higher.  If you are able perhaps you could tell your doc that you'd like to try to move up the biopsy since you are having severe anxiety--perhaps tell them you'll take a cancellation if they have one?  In the meantime, tell yourself this story: it will be okay and turn out to be nothing.  

    Hugs

    Claire

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  • capricornchrissy
    capricornchrissy Member Posts: 12
    edited March 2014

    Girl, I feel your pain.  I am in a similar situation where some abnormal results on a bone scan has resulted in my MO recommending a PET scan on March 19.  Like you, everyone says it is most likely nothing, but could be a recurrence of cancer.  I think about it all the time.  I don't want to alarm my husband and family with something that is most likely nothing, so I just suffer in silence.  I'm usually fine, then I start thinking and worrying about it, and all sorts of terrible possibilities enter my mind.  I just keep reminding myself not to catastrophize and that it is most likely nothing at all.  I try to think of the wonderful spring and summer I am going to have with my kids when all of this is over.  It has been almost two years since my initial diagnosis, but these latest tests are bringing it all back.  It sucks, but I will get through it.  So will you.  I will keep you in my prayers.  

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  • shoppygirl
    shoppygirl Member Posts: 694
    edited March 2014

    Morwenna

    Fellow Calgarian, I am sorry that you are dealing with this. Take some comfort in the information that the trained professionals are telling you. They know what to look for. I think the hardest thing about this disease is that they are always looking at us so closely that it puts so much fear into every situation. I have had several scares including a lung nodule that they are watching and a thyroid nodule that I had a biopsy on. It came back benign but they are still sending me for an ultrasound every six months to watch it. 

    I hope everything turns out ok. 

    Hugs to you! 

    PS - this weather really sucks!!  

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  • Morwenna
    Morwenna Member Posts: 1,063
    edited March 2014

    It's bloody cold ain't it!!!

    Thanks all for your responses. I suppose the 12th is only the middle of next week ...... but then it'll be another week to ten days to get the result. 

    Sigh. Just keep swimming, just keep swimming!

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited March 2014

    Morwenna, waiting sucks. There's no getting around that. It's especially bad when you can't get out of the house. If your a game person, I find that online games can really help pass the time. There are some word games on this discussion board. Sending good thoughts your way for a B9 result. Best wishes!

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  • shoppygirl
    shoppygirl Member Posts: 694
    edited March 2014

    Oh and mall walking at Cross Iron Mills is very fun and you might find some good deals!! 

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  • anneflorida
    anneflorida Member Posts: 59
    edited March 2014

    I had a hard lump under my scar line and when biopsied, it was a fatty necrosis which is benign!  

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  • Morwenna
    Morwenna Member Posts: 1,063
    edited March 2014

    yes I'm told that's what it could be. Neither my physician nor the radiologist seemed too worried by it. 

    We just need to know for sure ..... Thanks :)

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  • Morwenna
    Morwenna Member Posts: 1,063
    edited March 2014

    Biopsy reports: Scar tissue .... panic oevr :) 

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  • shoppygirl
    shoppygirl Member Posts: 694
    edited March 2014

    YAY!  Well that great news sure makes up for the horrible weather we are having!!! 

    Very happy for you!! 

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited March 2014

    Wonderful news! I'm so happy for you!!

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  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited March 2014

    Whew! We couldn't be happier for you, Morwenna. Great news!

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  • capricornchrissy
    capricornchrissy Member Posts: 12
    edited March 2014

    Yay, that's great!

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