DIEP 2014
Comments
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Gosh, I have lots to catch up on. Janet, I totally relate to the not looking thing. I can do the same thing, and pretend it's all not happening, and then slowly work myself into reality. If I didn't have this constant pain from the implants right now, when I am dressed I would believe nothing is wrong.
dlm, you should probably be okay, barring any complications, to be alone part of the day by week 3. With three sons don't you have them coming and going all the time? I bet they will help you a bit if you ask nicely...lol. Boys!!! I know.
Teacher, I am impressed! Making your own drain pouch!!! Love it.
Annajo, for those who could have had a lumpectomy with rads, like you, and me and many others, then what? We watch and worry for how long? Waiting for my path report to come back was pure hell!!! I never wanted to do that again, especially since my results weren't good. What if next time it wasn't DCIS. What if it was a more aggressive cancer, and I needed chemo and rads, and a radial mastectomy. NO THANKS. I had my bmx a year ago, with expanders and now implants that I hate!!! My diep can't come soon enough. As difficult as this last year has been for me, I still believe I did the right thing. I hope you get to that place. It is hard while you are still so uncomfortable and adjusting to your new normal.
Lemon, never apologize for letting it all out. That's why we are all here. You are going to be a grandma, and you are going to love it just like I do!!! Hang in there. It will get better. If you go back and look at some of the past posts, and see where these women are now it will give you the encouragement you need. A lot of them have completely moved on, and we don't even hear from them anymore, but that is what is suppose to happen. Saying goodbye to cancer, and surgery, and getting back to living. There is a thread that is called Moving on after the Flap. These gals use to be where you are now, but now they are talking about the business of living, like vacations, families, gardening, exercising, staying healthy, etc. We will get there.
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Jaz, yay for no drains!! I am jealous!
Goldie, I could not have had lumpectomy. My DCIS was too widespread. It was over 13 cm in my smallish breast. So that was not a choice that I had. I do feel that so many of these articles about watch and wait oversimplify the situation. Someone like me, there would eventually be nowhere for the DCIS to go, so it has to pop out. (That is my unscientific guess). I'm so sorry the implants didn't work out! No one wants to go through reconstruction twice- I cannot imagine! and I know some do it more than that even!! I have so much respect for your struggle.
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Regarding looking at ourselves, my DH had to wash me in the shower for a month because I couldn't bring myself to look or touch myself at all. It felt like such a huge hurdle had been cleared when I did it for the first time!
dlm - we are all different but I would say you'll still need some help two weeks out. Things like groceries and housework will be difficult because you won't be able to do any heavy lifting. I think there are support groups that can arrange assistance for that kind of thing in the USA? Hopefully someone else can chime in with more info.
annajo, sleep is a great healer, both physically and mentally. Hopefully now you're home and more comfortable it will get easier.
lemon, that was such a great post! Thank you for sharing that. -
Goldie - Exactly! I love what you said - 'slowly worked myself into reality'. That's so perfect. We have so much to absorb that sometimes we have to do things out of order. If I ever wrote my memoirs, that would be the name of the final chapter.
Ridley - Back to work already. I'll be thinking of you. I can't believe how time flies. Seems like just yesterday you were stuck in your recliner during an ice - storm.
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Maybe that's why I got so down about it all ... I looked, every damn day, and felt that I looked horrible. Frankenstein's daughter, or something.
My tummy still swells, and I'm getting real sick of yoga pants. I think my boss is, too (nah, he's been a pal about it all, really). It swells above the tummy scar AND below it. Is that how it is for you all, too? My foobs are no longer so achy and I'm wearing regular bras now.
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Thanks Janet - day 1 is done - tackled the mountain of email that was awaiting me.
Re the recliner - something for those who have not yet had surgery to check if they have an electronic recliner - does the battery back up work? I love that chair, but got stuck in it twice during an ice storm a couple of weeks after surgery and had to climb out!
Maggie - glad your foobs are feeling better. I'm with you on the yoga pants - so much more comfy. I think I have swelling still above the incision, but don't feel it below. I'm not that great at noticing these things, but I have felt that my stomach above the incision is harder at the end of the day sometimes (and it's not muscle:))
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from another thread....it feels appropriate for here too.
remember, too, where you are today, is not where you will always be....time brings healing and change, physically and emotionally.
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Ridley, most of my swelling is above the scar and it is hard, too. Below it seems so puffy .. NOT hard ... but puffy. I will be asking Doc Trahan about it on my Stage II consult. I am so ready for this to be over, and I haven't been anywhere near what some of you ladies have been through! But then again, I don't have much patience
Jaz - I remember when that last drain came out, and how euphoric I was! Congratulations to you - it is definitely a reason to smile.
Goldie - I always love your posts. You're so positive, and many of us need that
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Urgh...I wore a bra to work today. Since my December revision I've only rarely worn one, mostly opting for close-fitting camisoles. Before the end of the day, I had to lock my office door and pull the darn thing off and stuff it in my lunchbag. I probably need to see the fitter and get some new brassieres, but how long until even a properly fitted one will feel comfortable? I can't STAND it!
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melissa2013, if you are out there, good luck tomorrow.
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sbe.....make sure you don't unwrap your bra at lunch tomorrow with your co-horts!
What is uncomfortable....the band, the cup, the straps, the pressure?????
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lemon, such beautiful words and feelings. It made me cry, so obviously your words spoke some truth for me, too. You definitely are a Champion!
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Thank you all, it was pouring out last night.
nahahi- love the picture and the meaning, gives me thought.
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sbe- Have you tried the genie bras? It is the only one I can wear now, everything else is to restricting.
nihahi- thank you for sharing that, so true!
maggie- my stomach does that too since I had stage two. Mine gets hard like when I was pregnant and had braxton hicks. Im all kinds of lumpy and bumpy down below the scar too.
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Thanks for the good wishes. Finishing a glass of wine and then off to bed.
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nihahi - I wish there was a "like" button on here
I haven't worn a bra this week because the noobs really hurt after the scar revision and the bandages are too big anyway - going in today to get the dressing changed so hopefully I'll be able to wear one and stop wearing bulky clothing to try to hide! I ordered a Bali 3550 from Amazon last week in anticipation - fingers crossed for a good fit!
I still swell sometimes above the scar line, but it has been really lumpy and bumpy on either side of it this week - on Monday the PS made me lie flat on my back and raise both legs to check my stomach muscles and things haven't looked right since! She did give me a referral for PT, though, so I'm very happy to be able to start that soon!
Six months out and I still wear yoga pants. Between the sensitive belly skin (numb, but tingly... weird), frequent "braxton hicks" feeling and super sensitive ends of the scar I just don't feel comfortable in jeans yet.
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Lahela, I had Braxton-Hicks-type contractions until my Stage 2revisions......now I have this wormy-type wiggling that happens every once and a while....def. a strange feeling!
Hang in there, new noobsters.......it WILL get better.....I am out almost 14 months.....tats are up next.....can't believe I am almost done!
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I'm amazed to find out that it's not just me with weird small crampy, or wiggly feelings, in the muscles of my abdomen. It's almost exactly like 32 years ago, when one of the twins would wiggle and kick. I've been trying to imagine telling my boss and family that I'm preggers, at this stage in my life. I've always wanted a girl...
Nihahi, I can't really describe why the bra is so uncomfortable. Maybe it's the pressure on tissues that are sensitive, along with the fact that I haven't worn one in a couple of months and the sensation is unpleasant. Sweet, I'll def give the Genie a try.
Sleep well, Melissa--soon you're be on the other side of it!
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Well, dang ... I was hoping my tummy would kind of get back to normal - or close to it - after Stage II. I guess I though the lipo would take some of the hardness/discomfort away.
My breasts feel too big ... I'm sure its a C like I was, but they still feel too big. Maybe its the swelling, but I may ask to be smaller when I get to NOLA.
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Best wishes today Melissa, see you on the other side
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Maggie, it's too early for you to worry about size - the swelling will take a long time to fully subside. Mine took over three months to settle in. Now of course they're swollen again after the scar revision, but I didn't realise until I put my bra on when I got home from the PS's office today.
Frankenboobs. That's all I could think when I saw them! All puckered around the scars, lumpy and bumpy and scabby... DH kept telling me that's what they were like after the first surgery and it will get better, but I'm not loving them today
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Question. I have a big divot in my armpit, I think from the SNLB, or maybe swelling? Does this resolve, or is it a Stage 2 fix, or is it mine to keep?
Janet and sbelizabeth, I have to tell you that I have thoroughly enjoyed reading your blogs, except it makes my stitched up tummy hurt when I laugh so much! Thank you, thank you for those gifts.
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Omg, Lahela ... that is what I will call them from now on ... Frankenboobs! Hahahaha ... yes, I figured I have several months more of swelling, but they did tell me they would make me bigger or smaller if I wished at Stage II. How they can tell that with all the swelling is beyond me.
annajo - sounds like a Stage II fix
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Annajo, thanks! Gosh...my blog is so far behind, and so many great things have happened since my last post. Now it will be on my list to get it updated.
About the divot--it could be just emphasized because of the swelling, but if it's an issue when Stage II is done, it can be fixed.
Whenever I refer to my lovely but somewhat cobbled together breasts as "Frankenboobs" my hubster corrects me. "They're you and they're beautiful," he says. And it makes me feel beautiful.
Who was it here who said they were getting the bags under their eyes fixed? I SO need that--mine are so huge, if I hadn't already had my DIEP, they could have used the bags for the new breasts. It's a genetic thing. Both my brother and I are turning into my father.
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- to Janet M: Hi Janet! I took your advice and sent an email and heard back within 24 hours. Mary apologized for not returning the Dec. phone call and told me I was on the list and there were 3 or 4 ahead of me. I was just so happy to hear and to know that I did not fall through the cracks In the meantime I am gaining a lot of useful information reading the posts of the brave women who have finished their reconstruction. Thank to all for sharing
- to Janet M: Hi Janet! I took your advice and sent an email and heard back within 24 hours. Mary apologized for not returning the Dec. phone call and told me I was on the list and there were 3 or 4 ahead of me. I was just so happy to hear and to know that I did not fall through the cracks In the meantime I am gaining a lot of useful information reading the posts of the brave women who have finished their reconstruction. Thank to all for sharing
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Brendarj - Fabulous! I'm really happy to hear that your touched base with Mary, and that the ball is rolling. A great way to end the week. (Even better than the mild temperatures)
Thanks for letting me know!
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Today I watched a DIEP procedure from Harvard online. It demystified the procedure, cleared up some concerns, and led to additional questions. Reconstructive surgeon got all blood work and and cardiologist said my heart function is good. Essential Movements coach said my ROM is where it should be at this point. New soft pants and a shirt have been purchased to wear home. What have y'all done in the week prior to procedure? Cleaning and cooking are on my list, but are there things that are significant to do before checking in at 5:30 am on the 18th?
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Melissa- best wishes and prayer to you today.
Braxton- hicks.. wiggles.. Wonder if that is caused by nerves?
I have a question as usual, I am ILC with LCIS and DCIS hopefully all gone from my right ( trouble maker) side. During radiation I kept telling my good side the left if she did this she would get barbequed too. So, I am so curious as to what all of your pathology reports said if you removed your good side? Were there any surprises? My BS said if they find anything in the left they would have to go back in and do a SNB on that side. I think the SNB was horrible on my right and I have lymphedema there the gift that keeps giving. If they find anything ( I cant call is "C") does that mean treatment again? Or once its gone its gone and only TX if the nodes are bad? I had clear nodes except for 2 micro mets outside the nodes, they hadn't made there way in yet, thank you God. Just nervous if my right made a bit of it all and ILC is usually bi lateral.
Hope this makes sense, thank you ladies. I hope you all have a wonderful healing, happy weekend. Today it is 50 here but expecting snow this weekend, guess its just a tease of Spring but I will take it!
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Lemon, I had ILC on rightie, leftie was clear. I had a SNB on leftie at time of bmx, clear. I have bilateral LE. I don't know the answers to your other questions but your doc might. I wore my compression sleeves in the hospital after DIEP.
Teacher, make sure you have lots of pillows or a power recliner. You'll be sleeping on your back for awhile. I slept in the recliner at first and then used a wedge pillow in bed. I used a shower chair in the shower as I was unsteady in there. Showers really exhausted me. Have a lanyard, tubing, ribbon or something for your drains while you shower. It wouldn't hurt to do squats this week (if needed) so your legs are more prepared to get you up by themselves. I wasn't supposed to put weight on my arms. My family loved to remind me of that!
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Hi Lemon - I had to decide whether to do an SNB on my "good" side. We did some additional imaging in preparation for surgery, and that led to a biopsy and diagnosis of DCIS on the "good side", so I had the SNB. I had understood that you can't go back and do an SNB after a mastectomy because all of the breast tissue is removed, so you might want to clarify with your breast surgeon as to what was meant. My final path didn't show anything more serious than DCIS on that side.
I think whether you would need additional treatment if something unexpected showed up would depend on what it was. In my case, I was already taking tamoxifen and had no issues with margins from the DCIS, so there was no additional treatment.
Hope you enjoyed your Spring like weather today We are supposed to get to above freezing tomorrow. We still have mountains of snow, so it's going to take a lot of warmer days to melt it all.
Ridley
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