Winter 2013-2014 Rads

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  • QuirkyGirl
    QuirkyGirl Member Posts: 383
    edited March 2014

    Ellen - my MO cautioned me I might feel sad and out of sorts when treatment ends and that many women don't fully process their breast cancer until then.  It makes sense I suppose. So glad you are posting.

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  • DoxieMomof3
    DoxieMomof3 Member Posts: 14
    edited March 2014

    Hello,

    I haven't posted much, but I have been following this thread, and I so felt the same way about the end of treatment.  So lost :(  and I didn't know how to explain it to my family.  I just kind of felt like while I was doing chemo and radiation I was doing something to FIGHT the cancer, but now I just feel like I have no control of the cancer anymore. It makes me feel better knowing that I am not the only person who felt this way!

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  • ginadmc
    ginadmc Member Posts: 263
    edited March 2014

    ...2 weeks down, 4 to go for me. I don't have any redness or fatigue but that may come as I get closer to the end. I've had the early appt so far so it really hasn't been too inconvenient but it makes for a long day, out the door by 6:45 am, work until 4:00 pm and then onto the the health club and back home by 6:00 pm.. My rad techs have been kind and professional and I really like my RO. I had him 4 years ago and requested him this time, too. 

    To those of you that have finished or are finishing rads soon - I think there is a certain "protected" feeling while we are in active treatment; seeing MO during chemo, RO during rads but once we're done, we feel somewhat alone. I also feel agree with QG that when we're in the thick of diagnosis, surgery, active treatment, we're in survival mode and once we're not so busy with appts, etc, we do have time to think and try to process what we've gone through.

    Good luck to everyone this week!   Gina

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited March 2014

    I'm sorry for everyone having a difficult time after treatment. I'm still in treatment so haven't reached that point yet. It does seem like there are so many resources for women/men while they are in treatment, but once done, they are kind of left on their own. There should be some kind of transition program to help with getting back to our lives.

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  • TeamKim
    TeamKim Member Posts: 568
    edited March 2014

    Thanks to all of you caring sisters for your kind words for one another -- how blessed we are to have found our way to this thread! (((Hugs))) to you all!

    Ellen and Sally, I feel a little wistful too.  Trying to fill the void with busy-ness, but I think I am just avoiding thinking.  Relatives who mean well keep saying "thank goodness you are done" and I surprise myself with the speed of my retort that rads side effects can last another two weeks .  It is almost like I am clinging to it.  Maybe I like the fight, or have gotten used to it.  Maybe I feel more checked on, as you say.  Or maybe I am a little bit spoiled by the attention.  Nonetheless, it seems to be an odd transition.  I will look for that book and see if I can get it on my iPad Kindle.

    Red, I am so glad you are taking an extra day each week.  I have been fatigued this week as well (though it was worse during chemo) but I think part of it might be the lack of sleep from breast discomfort as the "sunburn" started peeling and I have the zingers deep in my breast.  I was a coach potato this weekend -- sometimes we just have to give into it and veg for awhile.  Letting the crockpot to the cooking today.... Smells good, I think I will check on it....  

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  • Miminiemi
    Miminiemi Member Posts: 340
    edited March 2014

    Hi All- finished my 16 rads 12 days ago and went on a five day trip to Arizona.  Some how I've come down with a terrible cold or something that includes fever.  But my skin is healing with the little grey clumps described by checkers.  I went braless the whole trip because the crease beneath was breaking down.  Your own damaged skin is the best protection for that pretty pink new skin underneath.  Just wanted to say hello and let you know it really does heal about the end of week two post rad.  Aquafor and calendula cream were my best friends.  

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  • Furfriend2
    Furfriend2 Member Posts: 299
    edited March 2014

    Sbp-Thank you for info on the book, I also will check if my library has a copy. 

    Red, I am pleased for you so here's to good health & healing for you and for us all. 

    I would like you join you gals in the pocket party & dance the night awayLoopy

    I like this quote and find it appropo " When you're at your Lowest, look to the Highest."

     

    I think of you ladies often

    Furfriend

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  • ellenkc
    ellenkc Member Posts: 173
    edited March 2014

    SBP1952 -- Thanks so much for the book recommendation. You reminded me that I have a copy that the cancer center gave me 8 years ago on my previous bout. I think I kind of blew it off last time -- small tumor, no chemo. I think I got busy and ignored the feelings. This time the addition of chemo makes a big difference. (BTW, I am guessing the 1952 in your screen name mean you were born the same year as I was!)

    And to all the rest who responded -- you have been a huge help! I feel far less alone.

    I have skated around the internet some, and find that in terms of getting past cancer (which has been viewed as a form of grief) it is still early in the process, and in terms of grief over the loss of a spouse, 6 months is also considered early in the process. Each one can take a year or more. In a way, cancer has distracted from my grief, and grief has distracted from emotional processing of the cancer. So I guess I still have a lot of emotional work ahead of me.

    Ellen

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited March 2014

    oh ellen, You have really been through so much. I'm so sorry for your loss. {{{gentle hugs}}}

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  • Furfriend2
    Furfriend2 Member Posts: 299
    edited March 2014

    Ellen,

    Big hug (((Hug n Squeeze))) for you!

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  • sbpop
    sbpop Member Posts: 20
    edited March 2014

    Ellen, you are right, you & I are the same age! Sending love with prayers for physical & emotional healing. God bless. ♥♥♥

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  • Furfriend2
    Furfriend2 Member Posts: 299
    edited March 2014

    Ohhh, Pink in the ruby red dress-ahhhh very pretty and lovely , lovely voice " Over the Rainbow" BeautifulThumbsUp

    Fur

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  • checkers
    checkers Member Posts: 95
    edited March 2014

    Congrats to everyone completing rads! Remember to remove those heels during our pocket parties

    I'm 5 days post rads and everything is healing beautifully, including the boost field. The only exception is the tumor site. Since the beginning of rads I noticed an achy, bruised feeling at the tumor site and during the boosts my RO said she could see exactly where the tumor site was by how irritated it was. Now when I do the Xeroform gauze the site gets weepy and gooey and when I do the Domeboro soak it gets dry and crusty. It is also painful and need to take ibuprofen several times a day. I see the rads nurse on Wednesday and will find out if this is typical or if I need to stop one or the other treatment. 

    On the flip side, I got lucky and have experienced very little fatigue and have continued to work full time!

    For those of you just starting or nearing the finish line, hang in there, you'll get through it and we'll all celebrate with more pocket parties!

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  • lauriekaiser
    lauriekaiser Member Posts: 8
    edited March 2014

     I relate to the ladies who feel lost and bereft after treatment.  I feel the same way although i am still in treatment.  This link is so helpful.  I feel that I want to go back to work part-time.  I miss my work.  However, I am very tired.  I could push through the fatigue.  I know that going to work during treatment varies with each person but I would love to heart some feedback.  I guess I am feeling a bit isolated.  I would love to hear from those who have an opinion on working vs staying at home.  thank you. :)

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  • 70charger
    70charger Member Posts: 963
    edited March 2014

    Re feeling lost.  I finished active treatment Jan 3rd.  Yes you feel lost, like something is missing.  I've been told it is like a form of PTSD .  We've been so busy with treatment we have not had time to process it all.  Yes it does get better.  I think I felt this way for a couple of weeks after Rads were done.  Then you just kinda move on with your daily "stuff".

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  • Lojo
    Lojo Member Posts: 303
    edited March 2014

    Hi all - 

    I had a question for those who have dealt with rads during winter --

    The Cancer Center is closed today due to the weather, but will be open on Saturday. Does anyone know if I "have" to go in on Saturday, or whether I can choose to just extend my treatment one day on the end? Also, if I do Saturday, that will mean treatments #8-17 with just a one day break - will I be that much more tired than if I take off both Sat and Sun? I've been feeling pretty good so far, but I did notice some tiredness Friday afternoon after treatment #7, but it only lasted a few hours and I feel ok again this weekend/Monday.

    I'm really ready to see the backside of this winter.

    Thanks :)

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  • 70charger
    70charger Member Posts: 963
    edited March 2014

    When I missed due to weather , it was just added at the end.  I don't think you will be any more tired if you go Sat.

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  • alfranco
    alfranco Member Posts: 200
    edited March 2014

    Ellen big hugs to You.

    Congratulations to all of you finishing up today.

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  • AndreaJ50
    AndreaJ50 Member Posts: 889
    edited March 2014

    I went in today for my set up appointment. Did all the measurements and tattoos. I have to wait 7-10 days for my plan to be established and then I will be starting to ride the radiation train. 

    I posted on Facebook that I got my first tattoo... Actually 5 of them. The responses I got were hilarious. So I came clean. Then I said they were blue dots that looked like the Earth from outer space. Reminds me of the episode where Phoebe and Rachel get tattoos!!

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  • ellenkc
    ellenkc Member Posts: 173
    edited March 2014

    Lauriekaiser: getting back to work has been a life saver for me. Much of my chemo time was spent alone in my house, particularly since whenever I took pain meds I couldn't (shouldn't) drive. Just being around people and having something to challenge my mind makes a huge difference.

    Amazingly, in January when I had finished chemo and was ready to go back to work, a part time (up to 29 hours) position opened -- about 3/4 of a position I held from 2005-2007. I am the grants manager for a DA's office & they have basically said to work whatever hours I want as long as the work gets done. So I worked throughout radiation, though on days like today I come home early due to fatigue, which hadn't really hit until this past weekend.

    If you have an understanding employer and flexibility on hours, I would say go back to work. -- Ellen

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  • Jmfrankel
    Jmfrankel Member Posts: 86
    edited March 2014

    Ellen and Teamkim...pocket party for our last treatment today!  It's bittersweet and doesn't seem like it is really over especially with the pain still present.  

    Ellen...it sounds like your year has been tough with the loss of your spouse too.  So sorry for your loss.  I can't imagine dealing with both cancer and the grief you are going through.  Big gentle hugs to you.  You are a true survivor!  

    Anyone else finish today?  

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  • TeamKim
    TeamKim Member Posts: 568
    edited March 2014

    JM & Ellen -- let the pocket party begin!  Red, crank up the tunes and pour the drinks!   I know we all have mixed feelings today, but I am trying to focus on what an accomplishment it is to just persevere through all of this mess.  

    True to form, my RO's office didn't do much to acknowledge the occasion -- they did print out a cheesy diploma for me.  No bell to ring, no hugs, no cheers -- just "see ya."  Not sure what I was expecting or hoping for.

    Ellen -- I second the hugs -- you have had so very much to contend with.  Your strength is inspiring, and I hope we have been support for you as you have for us.  <3

    Lojo -- I missed a day due to the Presidents Day holiday, and that is why I am finishing on a Monday.  At the point where it came in my treatment, I appreciated the 3 day break because my skin could heal a bit.  For where you are in treatment, having only a one day break probably won't make much difference.

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  • Miminiemi
    Miminiemi Member Posts: 340
    edited March 2014

    There was no celebration at my RO's office either when I finished.  Just a follow-up appointment card.  But I brought each of the people there a token for their "happiness file" to remind them of good things they have done.  I can say planning a brief trip to visit and friend created a nice transition from "treatment" to "life again."  She is a survivor and understood what we all feel.  I started to promote my clown business again and am planning a busy schedule just like I did to help with grief when my husband passed three years ago.  We can do this, ladies.  FYI, today is the first day with a bra again since skin seems pretty well healed.  Starting to feel normal.

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  • Jmfrankel
    Jmfrankel Member Posts: 86
    edited March 2014

    Team Kim...I just got a cheesy diploma too.  Although I was glad I had my favorite rad tech there for my last treatment.  She was the only one who figured out the secret to getting me aligned on the first shot.   

    I am supposed to see my RO this Thursday so he can check my skin.  Hurts like crazy right now.  Trying not to move much.  Also got heart burn as SE last Thursday.  Anyone else get heartburn from rads?  My RO is always checking my esophagus so I am thinking maybe something is irritated?  I got it bad with chemo too.  I just have a sensitive stomach.

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  • RedReading
    RedReading Member Posts: 2,143
    edited March 2014

    Yay to TeamKim JMfrankel Ellen and, o darn, who am I forgetting? I know there were 4 of you. OK and that extra special lady who's name I can't recall because my memory sucks. (you know who you are).

    Last day!!!!!!! Were we too loud during our pocket hopping party. Darn, the band was fine, you should have been there! The drinks flowed, both the non-alcoholic and the wine etc. I did a square dance with a few of the other Winter Radiants and I'm sure I saw two others discussing who should wear the lampshade.

    In our defense, we really did try to tone it down when the techs were in the room, but geez, our girls were graduating. Yay, whoopee, we partied for all of you!!!!

    {{{{{huggles}}}}} to all of you. You did it! Let us know how to navigate the next part, just like you've helped us through rads. 

    Thank you.

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  • 38tooyoung
    38tooyoung Member Posts: 27
    edited March 2014

    I finished rads on Thursday ! 33 sessions ! My skin held up great until about 25. Then down hill from there. My skin got raw and burned like hell , had trouble sleeping because moving was an issue. I would wake up in middle of night and lather Vaseline on my skin because it was so sore! Anything to get some rest. I lived on naproxen for the last 2 weeks.  Ugh... But 4 days after I finished I can say I am pretty much pain free now. My skin went from red and sore to dark and dry then peeled now it is healing. I honestly have to say that the last 2 weeks of rads were worst then my BMX. But moving on now. Woo hoo. The last 9 months were a ride that I never want to go on again. I am now on tamoxifen for 5-10 yrs because I am only 38. Good luck to all you awesome survivors! The only way to go is up! 

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  • sbpop
    sbpop Member Posts: 20
    edited March 2014

    I found some VERY comfortable bras called the "24 HOUR BRA".  The box reads "The ORIGINAL Scoopback Seamless Comfort Bra with Removable Pads".  It does not rub or bind.  I know I sound like a commercial, but it is really comfortable and actually has some support when you use the pads that fit neatly inside the cups in a  pocket (they are soft, too!). I bought mine at Meyers, although you may be able to get them elsewhere.   You get 2 bras for $12.98. The make is simply "24 Hour Bra". 

    I bought a size larger than I usually wear, and I remove the pads before washing them by hand.  I highly recommend them.

    Love and God bless us everyone!     Smile

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  • dragonfly45
    dragonfly45 Member Posts: 25
    edited March 2014

    Ellen, I was also triple negative,less than 1cm and 0 nodes. Out treatments are very similar. Today I completed 16 of 30 rads.  Saw my Oncologist today and he had nothing but good things to say, about my prognosis.  I will not see him again until June, both he and my surgeon say i am cancer free.  The treatments were just to gie me better % of it not coming back.  I did discussed my fears of reoccurance  with the counselor I saw during chemo,  she was very upfront and told me that after treatment is difficult.  Everyone thinks you are done and over with everything and cannot understand that you are still fatugued or not feeling your old self.  Plus the fear of a reoccurance is always with us.  I will definately be getting book AFTER BREAST CANCER - A COMMON-SENSE GUIDE TO LIFE AFTER TREATMENT" by Hester Hill Schnipper, LICSW.  Stay in touch and email me whenever you want.  Congrats on being done!

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  • QuirkyGirl
    QuirkyGirl Member Posts: 383
    edited March 2014

    howdy!  I'm scheduled to start six weeks of radiation soon.  Do you have any suggestions?  I'm very fair skinned and my RO nurse suggested calendula cream twice a day.   

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  • Miminiemi
    Miminiemi Member Posts: 340
    edited March 2014

    Welcome quirky girl - I just finished a couple weeks ago.  I had multiple creams that were ok with my RO.  But I loved the calendula best for the scent and feel.  I had calendula lotion by Welada.  It's a Germam company of baby products. I bought it in a health store in US.  Good luck.

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