Rockin' flatness like a bada$s

I'm another one who isn't there yet, but has been pondering it.  To me, flat seems empowering.  I understand that for others, reconstruction might have similar meaning, but for me, I really think that embracing flatness without reconstruction and redefining myself as a woman would help me more than going through more surgeries and more recovery in order to have reconstructed breasts.

I look forward to hearing more what others living this way have to say about it as I consider it as an option.  You all do rock!  

I am there with you bobogirl, 3 years now. I dress without apology, I even wear snug shirts. I am not defining myself by breasts...but I do define myself by dressing girlie...make-up, scarves at times, lace, jewelry...

I have 4 friends now, all 4 have had reconstruction and in all 4 cases, it went very wrong, multiple surgeries, infections, and me and my husband do not find the reconstructed look sexy or flattering. I do not think being flat is sexy or flattering ('scuse the pun :-) but I am more of a free spirit when I don't feel the bra bands hurting or see swelling due to a bra. Every bra goes right over my node extraction, it still hurts. The very last thing that I need is "place holders" stuck under my skin on my chest.

Now aside from my ranting, I do respect if I were younger than 55 when this happened, I could have gone for reconstruction, I don't know. I did get my teeth fixed so I am not anti-fixing up. I just think, for me, after cancer, enough is enough and I want to look good while flat.

Hi bobo,

I have not for one moment doubted or wished I had done anything other than my BMX with no recon.  I did think I might want to wear foobs so got 2 sets and several bras.  I've tried them once or twice in the house and really don't like them.  I go every where flat and totally enjoy it!  I don't even try to camouflage my chest any more.  I have camis in almost every color you can imagine and wear them under my shirts or jacket depending on the weather.  I do like scarves and wear one sometimes. 

In the very beginning, I was nervous that people would look at me and I was self conscious.  After about 3 trips out and about I came to the realization that no one noticed and no one cared.  It felt so freeing!  I love not having to wear bras!  I love not having to mess with prostheses!!  In fact I may be selling what I have on ebay some day soon.  

I am so much more than my boobs, they did not define me, and I feel just as feminine now as I did before! I don't miss them either!  I find it kind of odd how easy it was for me to let them go.  My mom died from bc years ago, so it was always hanging over my head that I may get it. When it came to me I knew I was going to get it out of me asap.  I didn't want to have the second shoe drop by only doing a uni so I went straight to BMX. Maybe because I had already had a plan in my head is the reason this has gone so smoothly.   I am rocking the flat and love it!!

Hugs!

I live in Alaska where layers are year round and almost everyone looks like they're ready to run off into the woods on some adventure.  I think if you could rock the flat look anywhere, it would be here.    No bras to worry about?  Sounds wonderful after spending a lifetime worrying about these overly big things hurting my back and threatening to kill me.  LOL

I love this thread!  I'm 54 years old & had bmx July 2012 (Stage2b).  Never looked back - very large breasts before, hard to buy bra's, hard to find bra's to exercise in - clothes, the whole deal.  

I keep waiting for that moment, that spark, when I'm going to think I want to have reconstruction - hasn't hit me yet, not sure it ever will.  I'm so thankful to be alive and with everyone on this forum.

So there i am, cooling my heels for 45 minutes in the plastic surgeon's office, leafing through the before-'n-after brochure very much on the fence about whether to go the reconstruction route after my scheduled BMX last year.  I thought, 'i'm 65 years old.  Married.  What do i care about what people think when they look at my chest?'  And then i had the 'aha' moment and thought that what i REALLY wanted, as long as i'm talking to a plastic surgeon, is a face lift.  Too bad no insurance covers it although it has to be a hell of a lot cheaper than the DIEP flap procedure or maybe even TEs/implants.  No reconstruction for me, but, alas, no face lift either; and i am very happy with my decision.

Thanks for starting this thread, bobogirl, and i hope it stays very active!!

YES....flat is awesome.   I have not regretted it once.   

Lisa, I agree, being flat is a great motivator to lose weight and keep what's left in shape. Still, easier said than done. I've stopped gaining but can't seem to lose the 10 pounds that I'd like gone.

bobogirl and everyone else --

I went two years as a uniboober with foob, but gradually just quit wearing any bra-like thing. Even light bras pinched and caused swelling where nodes were removed.

I like LL Bean layering tank tops as a first layer. Then a 3/4 sleeve tee over that, or a shirt, and/or a sweater.  I've looked at Still You, but I suspect I would not wear their foobs very much.

The only person I caught looking was a sales rep from Active Life who I met incidentally at PT. So I'm not buying anything from her.

An occasional strange man still talks to me in the grocery store, so I must pass some kind of female test, even flat and with no estrogen to speak of.