Getting married for insurance

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Cceandme
Cceandme Member Posts: 56
edited June 2014 in Employment, Insurance, and Other Financial Issues

my boyfriend and I have been together 15 years. WE've talked about getting married in 2015. After ding diagnosed with BC with no insurance we are thinking of getting married and getting on his insurance. Which is pretty good. (he works for Duke). Anyone see any potential drawbacks from this?

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  • farmerlucy
    farmerlucy Member Posts: 3,985
    edited January 2014

    Cce - I have a friend who did just that after like 20 years, for exactly the same reason. IMHO it is a great idea!

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  • kayfh
    kayfh Member Posts: 790
    edited January 2014

    If you have been living together for 15 years, the rest of the world thinks of you as married, so you might as well be.  But go for a large dose of romance, flowers, great meal, whatever.  And then fill in the insurance forms  

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  • ICanDoThis
    ICanDoThis Member Posts: 1,473
    edited January 2014

    Other than being married, no.

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  • ziggypop
    ziggypop Member Posts: 1,071
    edited January 2014

    My nephew filed for a domestic partnership with his girlfriend so that he could get on her insurance. I know that works in some states - but I'd get married as your SS options (for both of you) when you are older are potentially better. 

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  • Bren-2007
    Bren-2007 Member Posts: 6,241
    edited January 2014

    Cce ... I had a big chuckle when I saw your post!  My SO and I are going through the same thing right now.  It's quite likely that we will get married after almost 9 years living together.  He's all for it ... I'm dragging my feet.  Being insured is a very good reason to get married after being together for so long.

    Kay had a wonderful idea about throwing some romance into the occasion!!

    hugs,

    Bren

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  • peggy_j
    peggy_j Member Posts: 1,700
    edited January 2014

    You asked for drawbacks so I'm brainstorming here.....often there is a "marriage penalty" on federal taxes, so you may end up paying more on taxes. That's the only drawback I can think of, offhand.

    In theory, we can all get insurance now through Obamacare (ACA) but when I investigated it, even the best Obamacare plan was lacking compared to my DH's plan through work. (cost more and didn't cover as much).

    I know there are a slew of rights and benefits when you get married (just ask the gay marriage advocates). I googled and found this on the NOLO website. Your husband would be able to take a leave through the family leave act to care for you, if he wants. (maybe google for other rights as well?)

    http://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/marriage-ri...

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited January 2014

    My fiancee and I aren't getting married for insurance, but we are getting married for immigration, so that he can be here to support me. We've only been together a little over two years, mostly long-distance, but his support during my diagnoses and treatment has driven home for me that he is the one for me.

    And yes, I've been planning a small and casual wedding. It's been a great distraction and a serious dose of happiness!

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  • lekker
    lekker Member Posts: 594
    edited January 2014

    Congratulations!  Not to douse the romance, but maybe consider a pre-nup if you have any assets to protect?  If you choose to have one, make sure you each have separate lawyers shepherd you through the process.  

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  • Morwenna
    Morwenna Member Posts: 1,063
    edited January 2014

    Would there be any problem getting new cover as you have a "pre-existing health issue"? Just wondering.

    Last year I was arranging a student line of credit for my son, and I had to fill in a form for life insurance as his guaranteur. I was denied.

    I mean it was no big deal, they still authorized the loan, and I have pre-existing life insurance anyway. 

    But maybe it would be wise to check that you could get coverage before you marry, if that is the main or only reason for marrying?

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  • ziggypop
    ziggypop Member Posts: 1,071
    edited January 2014

    No IC can refuse to cover you or jack up your rates because of a PC in the US any more. I'm not sure but there may be a three month waiting period for the HI to kick in for the PE (Not sure about that). 

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  • Cceandme
    Cceandme Member Posts: 56
    edited January 2014

    Thanks everyone. Leaker- neither one of us are interested in a prenup. We've already been together 15 years and neither of us really has a lot other than the house and cars.

    Morwena- I will be covered due to new laws doing away with pre existing clause.

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  • pajim
    pajim Member Posts: 2,785
    edited February 2014

    I got married last summer after 23 years to get HIM on my insurance  :-)  

    Can go both ways. 

    I don't notice anything different about my life except I now wear this kick-a$$ ring.  Which is just the way I like it. 

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  • SuperFoob
    SuperFoob Member Posts: 505
    edited February 2014

    I am like Pajim. My hub and I got married after 17 years together. He got laid off from his job and, at the time, I was making enough $$$ for us to live one so we got married so I could put him on all of the benefits I received through my job. Also, the "marriage penalty" for federal taxes is if both spouses are making around the same amount of money. If one spouse makes much more than their spouse, or the spouse doesn't work at all, it is actually a "marriage benefit". 

    Fast forward to today (now 25 years together total), we live off of my disability and LTD. Fortunately, being married made it MUCH easier, and legal, for my hubs to make care decisions, if necessary, home ownership as "Joint Tenants with Rights of Survivorship" (available in Calif for married persons), Small Estate Affidavit for when I die, car transfer of ownership, and other things my chemo brain isn't thinking of right now. Many of these things are now probably covered under domestic partnerships, but being married is really easy, as in no questions asked.

    Oh....and of course, the kick a$$ ring....hee!

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  • leaf
    leaf Member Posts: 8,188
    edited February 2014

    Someone I know did this, but had a much different situation. I'll call her Pam, who is lesbian. This was decades ago, and was in California.  I'm not trying to advocate what Pam did in this situation.

    Pam had some big-time dental work that needed to be done, but her job didn't offer any health insurance, and she couldn't afford any.  So she married a guy she knew who had good health insurance, a platonic marriage, to get the work done.  They were totally honest with each other before, during, and after the marriage.  After she had the work done, she divorced him.

    When she went before the judge, she realized she hadn't discussed with her husband what reason she should give for the divorce.  So, when the judge asked for the grounds for the divorce, Pam answered, "Because he's a man."

    Everyone looked at each other,  but because this was a no-fault divorce state, it was granted.

    Pam is now in a devoted same-sex marriage.

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  • Bren-2007
    Bren-2007 Member Posts: 6,241
    edited February 2014

    Hey Leaf ... why'd you delete your comment?  I got a big kick out of it!

    It looks like our marriage plans are off.  I lost my job, so I need to stay on my Medicaid through the Breast and Cervical Cancer Program.  If we got married now, we wouldn't be able to afford double the insurance premium for a family/spouse rate.  Hell, we've been together 8 1/2 years, we can wait a little longer!  We are having a tough time just keeping up with Tim's medical bills from last year. 

    It was kind of exciting to think about being married again.

    hugs,

    Bren

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  • leaf
    leaf Member Posts: 8,188
    edited March 2014

    It is definitely true, but I thought it might be making light of the situation, and I didn't want that.

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  • Bren-2007
    Bren-2007 Member Posts: 6,241
    edited March 2014

    Hi Leaf,

    I didn't think you were making light of the situation.  I approach it with a good deal of humor myself!  I wondered if your story was true or not.  That's such a hoot that it really happened.

    hugs,

    Bren

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  • ziggypop
    ziggypop Member Posts: 1,071
    edited March 2014

    Now I want to know what Leaf said and deleted. 

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  • leaf
    leaf Member Posts: 8,188
    edited March 2014

    OK, I'll post again.  I just didn't want anyone to be offended.

    Yes its true.  I'm *not* advising that anyone do this; it could certainly be interpreted as 'milking the system'.

    Anyway.  A woman I know is a lesbian, and has known this all of her adult life. This happened decades ago when she lived in California.  She didn't have any health benefits, and needed some major dental work done.  A single man she knew had full health benefits.  Both the man and the woman were totally honest with each other about the situation.  He knew she was a lesbian, but he offered to marry her so she could get her dental work done.  Then they planned on getting divorced after the dental work was over.

    So, they got married, and the woman had her dental work done.  Then they went to the courthouse to get divorced.  (California is/was a no-fault divorce state.)

    She got in the courtroom, and the judge asked her why she wanted to have a divorce? They hadn't talked or planned about the grounds for the divorce.

    So, being very quick on her feet, she said, "Because he is a man and I am a woman."

    The judge looked at her, very puzzled.  But she did get a divorce.

    Recently, decades after this incident, she got legally married to her same sex partner.

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  • ziggypop
    ziggypop Member Posts: 1,071
    edited March 2014

    I'm actually very glad I asked, leaf, because this is one of those things that people don't think about in terms of insurance. I have always been single and when I was teaching part time considered to be 30 hours a week at a university, I could buy insurance for $187 a month with the university picking up the other half. This was the same deal that was offered to the spouses of full time faculty members. I always felt it a bit unfair that I had to pay the same amount as somebody who was not working there at all. So I don't think of it as gaming the system when somebody actually makes it work for them the way it works for other people. 

    My brother, also unmarried, gets insurance through work and is unmarried - spouses can be on the insurance plan as well (for free). Really this means that he is getting paid less than somebody who isn't married. It's a very strange set up (I think). 

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  • leaf
    leaf Member Posts: 8,188
    edited March 2014

    Golly, I never thought of it that way, ziggypop.  That's really true.  The system is really set up for traditional 'one person is the breadwinner, the other stays at home, if they have kids their kids get coverage, at a reduced or free rate.'  Thank you so much for this new perspective!

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