DIEP 2013
Comments
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Marty
you are a Blessing!...please don't ever leave, we need your wisdom
hugs
Ann -
lol @ Lucy - yes there are more than one way to satisfy needs, for our men and for us, aren't there?
My heart goes out to you single gals. I have no doubt I would be very nervous to be dating after breast cancer. I have more scars than a rag doll. And who knows how a potential partner might react to hearing the "C" word? There is also the added benefit for us married gals, that our partners already know what works to get our libido going. Starting fresh with someone new... definitely a little scary. But I have no doubt you gals can do this... in fact I look forward to hearing about your dating adventures.
I forget who mentioned NOLA... I am not knocking NOLA whatsoever but I do want to point out, I am not a NOLA gal and I am very happy with my recon results. I just want to say that because I feel like NOLA is pushed a lot on this website (which I think really stems from a handful or so of very active and vocal posters here that went there). There are plenty of good recon surgeons out there.
Which reminds me, I really need to take photos of myself now that I am healed from stage 2, and post them on the photo forum! Might try to do that tonight.
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My, oh, my, I appreciate the honesty here. Sex is not happening here.....too much on my mind but I have hope for it. We do talk about it. It's hard to try when you have memories of previous pain. We are still trying different lubricants as I am sensitive to several. Well, we WILL be trying them again...
Movie, I wish you felt better.
( I am rooting for you.
Sbel, I hope this surgery takes care of your rads adhesions once and for all and that you heal well and completely with the help of the hyperbaric chamber. It must be disappointing to still have more surgery to do, but sounds like the major stuff has been DONE! -
My, oh, my, I appreciate the honesty here. Sex is not happening here.....too much on my mind but I have hope for it. We do talk about it. It's hard to try when you have memories of previous pain. We are still trying different lubricants as I am sensitive to several. Well, we WILL be trying them again...
Movie, I wish you felt better.( I am rooting for you.
Sbel, I hope this surgery takes care of your rads adhesions once and for all and that you heal well and completely with the help of the hyperbaric chamber. It must be disappointing to still have more surgery to do, but sounds like the major stuff has been DONE! -
Just an FYI, my MO NP told me the vaginal dilaltors help A LOT with the dryness. My GYN also gave me these instructions:
Lubricant:
Pjur Eros Bodyglide
Vaginal moisturizer:
Replens (use 3 times a week)
You will have a vaginal discharge
Use a panty liner
Takes 2 months to see full benefit
Hope this helps someone! -
Jeannie, thank you for asking....am doing a bit better......nips don't hurt at all, but lipo still a little tender......Marty......I am going crazy with the Marena , but PS wants me in it for optimal results , so I will follow your lead, and stay in it!
Betsy , am so sorry to hear your news......that is a difficult road to travel, but there will be all kinds of support here on BCO. You are close to being done, right?
Christina, thank you for bringing up the NOLA/other PS's ....... I have the utmost respect for the whole NOLA organization, and what they are able to offer BC patients.......that being said, I am NOT a NOLA girl either, but am over-the -moon-thrilled with my PS and my recon results........I WISH he would start something like NOLA up in Oregon......but he likes things just as they are....... Maybe as more BC patients choose DIEP, he will grow, but I suspect not.....he said he likes being small....
Sbe......how are YOU feeling? -
moviemaniac... yes. I had surgery (little tweak) two weeks ago and all that's left is tattoos... April 10, I am getting tats with Vinnie. Can't wait. Trying to turn it into a girls weekend. Celebrate the conclusion. Yahoo. -
Movie- How long are you in your Marena? I had a hard time with the band on that garment, but think it is because I am short. I am back in my stage 1 compression. ( Veronique) It is too expensive to change now and am burning these things in 3 months. Ha ha. Way to keep it on. You can do it. -
I'm feeling great, Movie, thanks for asking! The incisions are still quite zingy and I can wait to get these two grenades outa my chest, but all in all, life is good. Took a shower this morning and went to church, then out for Mexican food with everyone, including Aubrey. She hasn't started solid foods yet, but my DS was feeding her little drops of rice pudding just for her to taste. She looked like a happy little baby bird.
Next hyperbaric treatment is tomorrow morning at 8:00 (no sleeping in!!) and we'll see after that if they want me to do more. I could pretend I'm Snow White in her crystal casket, but the techs look nothing like dwarfs and I've been married to my handsome prince for thirty-six years.
Jeannie, I AM a little disappointed that I'm not 100% finished, but truthfully, it might be better this way. I wasn't anticipating how painful my radiation scar revision was going to be, and now I don't have to deal with a painful abdomen at the same time. It was pretty funny, though, when the doctor at the hyperbaric medicine center helped me move the fresh dressings around so we could see the new nipples and we couldn't find one of them. We even dug through the dressing in case we'd accidentally pulled it off.
Not a NOLA patient, and I'm very happy with my plastic surgeon and the care I have received locally. My PS is experienced and compassionate, and my hospital is among the best. I'm sure the physicians at NOLA do great work--their patients seem to be loyal and happy--but it's nice to have my own Dr. W and LR Hospital right here in my backyard.
It's Sunday night and I don't have to go to work tomorrow! YAY! -
Those of you who were able to have your surgeries locally were very blessed. I am sure there are many skilled and experienced doctors, but not where I live. It certainly would have saved me a bundle. I was lucky to have found BCO. That is where I learned about a procedure called the DIEP. The rest is history folks. I have never felt that this thread pushed NOLA. I like to think we all had a unique procedure that is common to many of us here. This procedure is now being done all over the world and there are many happy women with their results from everywhere. That is what I love about this site. -
Hi Everyone,
Three sleeps left before my surgery day. I've been busy getting ready. Tried reading this thread from the start....only got to March lol. Today I check in on current activity and you guys are talking about sex. Thank you! Been wondering how that was going for others. Seems like I am in good company. Had a great 2nd visit with my plastic surgeon and have done all my hospital pre-op stuff. Continue to learn lots just from reading here and am glad to be part of this support network.
Here's to a good week for us all. -
Cherrie, I am having trouble with the Marena, too.....the band at the top is driving me CRAZY.....I must have an allergy to stretchy-bandy-thingies.......I feel like I am developing a huge hive all around the waistband......I have come up with a partial solution.....I fold the band over-outward on itself (I guess I am shorter waisted than the average Marena gal, and it still hits just under the boobs) and I have put curly gauze all around the inside of the folded-over waistband.....it is still up high enough that it covers all my lipo spots......I feel CLAUSTROPHOBIC in it! If I think about it for any length of time, I imagine myself tearing it to shreds JUST to get it off of me......
Sbe, I hope the hyperbolic chamber works it's wonder on your rads scars....fingers crossed!
Betsy, Vinnie in NOLA for tats? A girls weekend sounds like it would be a great way to celebrate the end of recon..........
First thing tomorrow I am calling PS office and finding out if I can do slow walking now....I am going crazy being cooped up, and I seem to do better with a little exercise............
Love you all!
XO -
Oceanwarrior....lol...made it as far as March....that means only about 8 or 9,000 posts to go!!! You sound good....keep putting one foot in front of the other!
Have to throw my hat in the ring.....I agree that NOLA does wonderful work, and has helped an amazing number of ladies. May they continue to do so. As for myself, not a NOLA either, and.....couldn't be happier with my PS and my recon....haven't yet had my stage 2 or tweak or whatever anyone wants to call it. It will be minimal because the original recon has turned out so well. The goal of everyone is to be well cared for, and to have wonderful results....it is a celebration for everyone that finds that, in all the different places and with all the different gifted, caring surgeons.
sbe....I've just gotta ask.....are you wearing your shiny red shoes tomorrow in the chamber???? You could pretend to be "Dorothy", and click them together if you get bored!!!! Not sure if you'd end up in Kansas though.
lahela....hope the weekend hasn't been horrific....thinking of you. -
Hey you guys having a problem with the compression garments being irritating.. One of the first things I read on this site was wearing thin "wife beater" type undershirts between your compression garment and your skin. I hear it helps a lot, especially when it is warm. I bought a 3 pack of them in the boys dept at Target so they would be nice and snug, and I wouldn't have a problem with them creasing under the garment and causing more annoyance. So far my doc just has me in spanx and it's not too bad. I have been wearing the undershirts under my pj tops to protect my incisions from rubbing on anything. I have been reading a lot on Google about the pros and cons of compression after lipo. Everybody has their own opinion. The average most docs want you to wear it is two weeks. It definitely is more comfortable with it on the thighs, the torso is fine with, or without. -
Jeannie.... try "sliquid" brand. I like the Sliquid H2O. natural intimate lubricant. it is water based. glycerin free. paraben free. hypoalergenic. latex rubber and plastic friendly (for you single ladies, or adventurous ones).
I have been gone awhile, and it's tough to catch up. I want to chime in on the sex conversation. I'm 49. 2 yrs post BMX. 6 months post Stage I DIEP. Married almost 20 years. 4 kids. I am fortunate to have feeling in both breast, but mostly deep feeling and just little light skin.
I will say that I am rarely "interested" in initiating sex, and mostly want to turn away. However, I find that if I 'give in' I mostly enjoy it. It has occasionally been painful, of course dry due to tamoxifen, and the big "o" is not always happening. But, intellectually I know that the more frequently I allow sex to happen, the more likelihood of satisfaction. We also enjoy more hugging, cuddling, touching, caressing and just good old fashioned making out. You may need to get more adventurous than ever to achieve satisfaction. Sex toys. Intimacy.
We try full on sex about once every couple of weeks. We succeed about half the time.
My husband doesn't just hope for the best, or even just go for it. He actively seeks out advice on websites and chatrooms for men! Yes, they exist. I stumbled on one he was asking husbands/men for tips on helping their women achieve orgasm, specifically, women with breast cancer.
Position is everything. Lubricant is, obviously, very important. Patience and NOT getting hurt feelings if you fail is the foundation, though.
It is possible to have an almost fully satisfying sex life. -
I do have a question. I am now 6 months post Stage I DIEP and have horrible swelling above the abdominal incision line. I'm not so sure, anymore, that it is a seroma. It still is less at the beginning of the day than the end. It is also worse when I stand for long periods.
Any thoughts on what I can do to help keep the swelling down?
Just keep on with the compression> -
SheChirple, nice to see you again! Thanks for the open input on the ongoing "what about sex" question. It's so great that we can share so freely here and learn from each other.
I, too, have the swelling above the abdominal incision line that is swellier at the end of the day. My PS AND my LE therapist said it's lymphatic fluid that's needing to find new channels to drain into the lymph nodes in the groin. The abdominal scar has created a dam that the fluid can't cross. My LE therapist said manual lymphatic drainage massage would help it find its new pathways to the groin.
Nihahi...sigh...don't I wish I could wear SOMETHING to spice up the hyperbaric dives just a little! But they pressurize the chamber with 100% oxygen and nothing is allowed inside except a couple of cotton blankets and the gown I'm wearing. One spark in there would create quite a big boom...
Happy Monday, everybody! -
sending healthy healing vibes to ocean, Ridley and damiana. Good luck with everything this week.
How are you doing Zoemom? Hope things are healing.
On the NOLA front. I think NOLA really sets the standard. The Dr that invented the procedure started there. Luckily as the years have gone on the knowledge has spread and now there are many places where you can get top notch care. But as we all know this surgery needs a tremendous amount of skill and if you can't find that in your area isnt it wonderful that there is a place you can go that really caters to out of towners! -
Oceanwarrier, you'll do great! Lots of good advice from the pros on here.
Shechirple, that is awesome! Sounds like you and hubby make a good team. But 4 kids! When do you even have time!? LOL You are an inspiration!
Back to the thief of joy quote (still one of my favorites) when Jeannie first mentioned it I told my husband that it was something I really needed to work on since my surgery turned out so sh*tty, and it was hard to read about how well everyone else was doing. His comment was "it's hard not to be a thief when you've got nothing!" I'm sure that didn't translate well but it made me laugh. We are a good team also.
But I do try to change my outlook from comparison to aspiration. Those of you doing well and being happy give me something to work towards. It IS possible. It's just a little more (ok a lot more!) patience and work.
sbel, since we're on the topic of romance, you can be sleeping beauty in your glass chamber waiting for your Prince charmings kiss.
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Like SheChirple, I too have some deep feelings in both of my breasts. In time, I believe our own "flesh and blood" will eventually get us all there. Something to look forward to in the department of intimacy...
I am not a NOLA girl and I am very happy with the work my local PS did. I do want to say "THANKS" to the outspoken NOLA ladies, that I went the DIEP route. The first local PS I had a consult with didn't even mention the possibility of DIEP to me.
Movie, folding the Marena band over-outward on itself is a good idea. You can also unzip/un-hook the folded over band to make it not so tight.
Sbe and SheChirple, there is a "belly breathing" and "tummy lymphatic drainage massage" that you can do to help with the swelling belly. The lliac lymph nodes are located under the belly button.
Belly breathing: lay on your back, breath in and let your belly rise; then breath out and let your belly button drop.
Massage: draw a cross on the abdomen centered on the belly button, you will have 4 quadrants. Massage each quadrant in a circular motion to guide the fluid to the nodes.
Here is a picture of the lymph system I took from the LE clinic.
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Wow, Tammy, that chart is so informative. It really demonstrates how the lymph system builds and branches. Thanks for the massage tips.
It took me about 8 - 9 months before the daily swelly belly finally subsided.
She - so glad to have you back. Your words are spot on. So glad you have some feeling. Very positive. -
Healing and peaceful vibes to the ladies in surgery this week! I can't believe it will be 8 weeks tomorrow (sounds like I'm counting a baby's age lol). I found this group right before surgery just in the nick of time to not loose my mind.
Chiming in on the PS brag. I was treated at MD Anderson Cancer ctr as I know a couple other ladies were. I can't say enough about the level of care, organization, research and innovation they have. People travel from all over the world there as well. Luckily I live in Houston.
I think we are all blessed to have options. If your hometown can't meet your needs then you can travel and go where you're comfortable.
In other news. I found a yoga class at the hospital and I'm going this week! So excited (not sure why lol) -
Tammy, thanks for posting the chart and the info! The chart lady's boobs look very nice. I want hers. -
She-thank you for your timely return, and those words or wisdom regarding sex and BC.......they were spot on!
So glad we have a safe place to vent regarding sex....it can be intimidating speaking with your dr.......whether we are getting it, or would LIKE to be getting it....coming on here and reading the great advice by you ladies.....is a good place to start!
Spoke with PS this a.m.......I can start walking on treadmill! Just have to be careful not to let heart rate climb too much! Yay! -
Tammy, is the massage to be done clockwise, or counterclockwise?or does it matter? Hilarious how Sbe's eyes went straight to the boobs...... -
well my boobs look like that! Lol.
Thanks for the info Tammy because I too have the bulge. I'm so happy to hear that is normal because I freak out thinking I've I'm gaining weight and losing this tight tummy that took do much work to get. -
Good question, movie. The answer is both. One hand goes one way the other the opposite at the two upper quadrants and reverse the direction when you are at the two lower quadrants. The goal is to guide the fluid towards the nodes nearing the center. Hope this makes sense
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hahaha....almost sounds like the "pat your head, rub your tummy" party game....I was never very good at the game....Crossing cerebral hemispheres is painful for me!!!!!
butterfley....great news about the yoga...hope you have a great instructor, and really enjoy it! -
Movie, did your PS give you a target heart rate? -
haha! The lymph chart reminds me of the purple line drawings PS drew on me before stage II.
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