My Mom also just recently diagnosed.....

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Elena777
Elena777 Member Posts: 6
edited June 2014 in Caring for Someone with Breast cancer
It appears that my Mom has had Breast CA that has gone undetected for years. All of her yearly Mammo's were read as no maliginancy noted. It appears now, that what they kept reading as density was in fact a tumor.
Since it was not found early, she has mets to her spine and clavicle. Her spine looks like swiss cheese. I saw the Cat Scan myself. It was awful to see. She has been complaining of back pain for so long. She was mis-diagnosed numerous times. They even took out her Gall Bladder in Feb. because they thought that was causing her back pain.
I could go on and on about all the Doctors she saw.
I am slowly coming to accept that it was not found earlier and I can not do anything about that.
She has started Radiation and she also started Hormone therapy today. Her Dr felt that a Mastectomy was not an option due to the extensive involvement within the breast.
As for prognosis, every Dr has something different to say. I am just taking it day by day and trying to spend all the time that I can with her.
Thanks for listening........
Elena
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  • nowheregirl
    nowheregirl Member Posts: 894
    edited July 2006
    {{{{{{{{{{Elena}}}}}}}}}}

    I'm sorry to hear about your mom. I too was misdiagnosed and it took a year until I was finally diagnosed with this disease. There's a board in this forum that is directed at the women with mets. I'm sure you can get tons of information and support there as well.

    You and your mom are in my thoughts.
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  • csp
    csp Member Posts: 2,765
    edited July 2006
    Elena,
    I am so sorry to hear this news.
    Something that one of the Ladies said here on the boards
    is don't listen to prognosis or stats It only serves to limit you.

    I am praying for you and Mom and that Mom will have a very good response to treatment .
    Come back anytime , we are here for you and Mom.

    Hugs,
    Carrie
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  • Sandra1957
    Sandra1957 Member Posts: 1,701
    edited July 2006
    Elena,

    Prayers to you and your mom. By any chance, was it Lobular??

    Lini
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  • Elena777
    Elena777 Member Posts: 6
    edited July 2006
    Hi Lini.
    The pathology report on the breast reads invasive ductal carcinoma.The ducts show necrosis in one area.

    Thanks everyone for your responses and well wishes.

    Elena
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  • cowgirl
    cowgirl Member Posts: 777
    edited July 2006
    Elena, I am so sorry for your news. I agree that since it has advanced a mast would be too much for her to endure now. Basically they will focus on shrinking the existing mets. I am praying for you and your family.

    No doctor knows exactly how her body will fight the cancer, so just stay positive and know she wants to survive and fight!
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  • texayn2005
    texayn2005 Member Posts: 24
    edited July 2006
    Elena, I don't know how old your mom is, but I am 61. I was dx 2/2005 with Stage IV bc mets to bone after 30 years of mammograms that found absolutely nothing wrong. I had some pain in my ribs and breast bone 2 years ago and the doc said it was costochondritis...which is an inflammation of the rib cage cartilidge and told me to take Aleve for the pain. After living on Advil and Aleve for over a year and the pain had moved to the lower back and hips, I decided that it was time to talk with another doc and that is when the bc was found to have gone to the bones in my skeleton.
    I had radiation and started on Femara daily and Zometa monthly. Have blood work every month to check tumor markers and for the past year I have been pretty good. I did retire from my job, but for the most part I am able to do what I want. I have to rest more often and am troubled with the side effects from the Femara..joint pain, hot flashes, etc. But that is a small price to pay for any added months to my life. Once your mom gets on a treatment plan and things start having some order to them, you will feel better. The initial stage is a bummer to say the least. I have been told by my doc that we are considering my mets as a chronic condition and we will continue to treat with different meds as the Femara loses its effectiveness. Lots of ladies on here are in the same boat. It is not great news, but it is some hope that we would not have had years ago. I have 2 grown daughters, 4 grandkids, a super husband and I plan to enjoy every day to the fullest. That used to sound so cliche to me when people would say that, but now I truly know what it means.
    Take care and take your mom's lead. Are you able to go with her to doc's appts and such to help her listen to what is said? Keep us posted and remember that we are here to help in whatever way we can and we will pray for you and your mom.
    Ayn
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  • Elena777
    Elena777 Member Posts: 6
    edited July 2006
    Hi Ayn. My Mom was also diagnosed with Costochondritis. She is 79 but she was a very active 79 before her diagnosis. They started her on a high Deacadron dose-(steroid) and she has not been able to walk since leaving the hospital. She is so unsteady on her feet. She feel 4 times in two days.Thankfully, I was there to catch her 3 times. She is basically bed ridden at this point. She goes to radiation via ambulance. Prior to June 10th, she was in a lot of unbearable pain but she still went out and lived her life. A week before they found the CA in her spine, her orthopedist told her she had a pinced nerve and to start physical therapy.He also said her c spine x ray was normal...
    Due the the damage done to her spine by the CA, they have told me that she can become paralyzed.They are hoping that the radiation will slow this down.
    I have always gone to as many doctor appts. in the past as I could. Now, I speak to her Doctors as much as I can. That is when they call back. I am an only child.
    Thanks so much for sharing your story. Best of luck to you. You will always be in my thoughts and prayers.
    Thanks again to all who have shown their support.

    Elena
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  • suzie14
    suzie14 Member Posts: 344
    edited July 2006
    Elena,I am so sorry your Mom and you have to go through this. My prayers and positive thoughts are with both of you.

    Hugs,
    suzie
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  • didda566
    didda566 Member Posts: 102
    edited July 2006
    I am so sorry that you and your family are going through this.
    Mom was diagnosed stage iv also. Her doctor also said she was not a candidate for a mastectomy. However, he changed his mind and last week she has a simple mastectomy. I am so glad.
    So far, she has had four rounds of chemo, then the mastectomy and finally she is on a bone stregthener and tamoxifen.
    Stay strong, and stay upbeat. Ask questions here. Someone here has gone through it and can answer them.
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  • Elena777
    Elena777 Member Posts: 6
    edited July 2006
    My Mom slipped into a coma this am. She is at home,where she wanted to be.This happened so quickly and we are so not prepared. Not that I ever would be. She is fighting like heck.This is killing me inside but I am trying to stay strong for her. I have not left her side since this morning. My husband is begging me to sleep and he will stay with her but I can't leave her. I just can't.
    Please say prayers for us and send positive thoughts our way.....

    Elena
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  • MIdb
    MIdb Member Posts: 27
    edited July 2006

    My prayers are with you and your family Elena. May God grant you strength and peace. If I could physically hug you, I would. But here is a hug.

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  • csp
    csp Member Posts: 2,765
    edited July 2006
    Elena,
    I am so sorry , Please know that you are in my prayers
    may God surround you with His peace and Love. Sending
    you prayers of healing light and postive thoughts~

    Carrie
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  • cowgirl
    cowgirl Member Posts: 777
    edited July 2006
    Elena,
    Rest when you can, I am so sorry she is at this point! I will pray for her and you!
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  • jgrjunque
    jgrjunque Member Posts: 47
    edited July 2006

    There is nothing that ever prepares you for this... our hearts and thoughts are with you all.

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  • pumpkin05
    pumpkin05 Member Posts: 28
    edited July 2006

    Oh, Elena...I can only imagine how hard this is for your family. Your story really touched me, and I will keep you and your family in my prayers. **big hug**

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  • csp
    csp Member Posts: 2,765
    edited July 2006
    Keeping you and your dear Mother in my prayers Elena ~

    Carrie
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  • Elena777
    Elena777 Member Posts: 6
    edited July 2006
    My Mom passed away early Friday morning. She fought like crazy but unfortunately she could not win this day.

    I am so sorry that I can't write more about what happened, but I can't stop crying. It has always been me and my Mom. I am trying to be strong for my children but it is soo hard. My 5 year old is taking it so hard. She kept going into my Mom's room while she was in a a coma and sitting down next to her and holding her hand. She just cries and cries that she wants her Nana, who is going to give her "nana hugs". My daughter went and put some of her stuffed animals and baby dolls on the bed with my Mom so they were with her when she passes.. I can barely cope but watching my daughter in so much pain is almost too much to bear.

    I did have the Hospice social worker meet with both of my children. She talked with them and felt that they will be okay--acting appropriately etc.

    My husband and I were with her when she passed.

    I wanted to thank you all for your support. It has helped me more than words can say.....

    Elena
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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited July 2006
    I am so sorry for your loss Elena...I only just saw this thread and I am at a loss for words.

    Giant hugs to you and your family,
    Peggy
    image
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  • nowheregirl
    nowheregirl Member Posts: 894
    edited July 2006
    {{{{{{{{{{Elena}}}}}}}}}}

    I'm so very sorry about your loss. My heart just goes out to you. But remember, your mom didn't LOSE the battle. There's no winners or losers. It's just that the battle was over and peace has begun.

    Try to be positive and tell your kids that she's in the better place now without having to suffer any pain. But you don't have to be strong all the time. Cry and be sad with your kids. It just shows how much you loved your mom. I don't think it gets them down.
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  • pumpkin05
    pumpkin05 Member Posts: 28
    edited July 2006

    Elena...I'm so sorry to hear that. Keep your chin up; we're all praying for you.

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  • Sandra1957
    Sandra1957 Member Posts: 1,701
    edited July 2006
    Elena
    Prayers to you and your family at this difficult time.
    lini
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  • cowgirl
    cowgirl Member Posts: 777
    edited August 2006
    Elena,
    May God help you find peace during this time! I am praying for you and your family.
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