Just diagnosed, 2 young children- I need hope

Not me, but I have a friend who was diagnosed with multi-focal breast cancer and had multiple positive nodes about 6 years ago (she was in her late 30's at the time). Her kids were a little older than yours, but not much (3 and 5). She had a mastectomy with DIEP flap reconstruction done a year later, chemo, rads, ovarian suppression (lupron) and tamoxifen, so they pretty much threw the book at it but now, 6 years later she is doing GREAT.

The battle you are facing won't be easy, that's for sure, but you can do this - just think of your kids and that will keep you fighting. (((HUGS)))

I had two multicentric tumors and 7 cancerous nodes, and I truly understand the shock and fear you're feeling. Like Annette's friend, they pretty much threw the book at it. It wasn't easy, but with the support of great doctors, nurses, and technologists working not only to treat my cancer but also to help me get through the treatments, I made it through.

It's been a year and a half since my diagnosis and 10 months since my last radiation treatment, and I'm doing great and no sign of cancer so far.

You've got a battle ahead of you, but you can do it! My daughter is school aged and as much as it's hard to go trough so many months when you physically can't devote the energy to them that you'd like, it also gives you a constant focus for your determination to do what needs to be done.

(((hugs))) to you, JMB2013 you can get through his. Praying for you and your family.

I can't speak to your specific dx but I was dx young with young kids (3 & 5). Those kids will get you through all of this. I was a crazy mess at first and the fear was borderline debilitating - all i thought about was my kids. I starting taking depression meds and it helped me be more level. It won't be easy but you will push through it. Once you are in treatment you will feel more in control. As your dx unfolds we will be here to help you.

Here for you,

Jen

hi. I am new to this forum as well, but not as new to the "club" we did not sign up for! I wanted to reach out to you because we both have young children. Mine not as young as yours, they are three little girls of 3, 5 and 7. Though, very very scary I can deal with my disease, but the slightest thought of leaving my children now or when they are teenagers or when they are mothers is devastating to me and by far the scariest part! I began on this board hunting down moms and reading posts and it does feel slightly better knowing I am not alone and I hope it helps you too. From initial diagnosis I have never been involved with support groups or on-line discussion forums and I wish I had. You are on a good start. The beginning is nerve wracking, but I promise it gets easier once you begin getting answers and starting treatment. I was stage ll with positive nodes axillary and submamillary. My mammogram looked more disease tissue than healthy tissue and the bad news felt like it never ended. If it wasn't for one little recently confirmed spot on my ilium bone that was there even from my very first scan I would probably be cancer free instead of stage IV. Chemo, surgery, and then radiation for all those nasty lymph nodes does amazing things. Take care of your overall health and mental wellness and follow your cancer tx path and chances are you will live a long healthy life. The thought that helped me with dealing with fear for my children was "thankfully they are healthy and don't have to do this". My worst nightmare is them being in my shoes. So then for a time I am happy it's just me, oddly enough. Best of luck to you! It will be a hard road but the prize is so worth it!!

I found it extremely helpful to have another set of ears in the room when speaking to your oncologist. If not, see if you can record the conversation. It can be difficult to register everything that the doctor is saying, and you may want to refer to the info later. I also went in with a list of questions. That way nothing was forgotten. I was stage 3 with lymph node involvement. Many people didn't know I was sick (I had chemo/rad), I tried to keep active and received a lot of support from my family and friends.

I'm 37, I had 18 tumors in one breast, 1 sentinel node with micrometastesis, BRCA1 positive. My kids are 13 and almost 2. On MRI my largest tumor was 4+cm, but after surgery it ended up 2.1cm. I had 6 large tumors the rest were small. I'm 40 days out of double mastectomy and reconstruction, I spent less than 24 hours in the hospital, I'm doing great, even joined the gym again. I will start chemo next week, I can't wait to kill my roque cancer cells.

Get an anxiety medication from your primary care doctor so you can sleep and function for your kids. Once your treatment plan is in place and you have had your surgery wean off the medicine and find other ways to cope.

Sending hugs your way and I will be thinking about you. Please message me if you have any questions or are just feeling low.

hi there. I know you feel you have rec the worst news possible but try not to look at it that way. look at it as God is about to create a better you and taking you on a world wind journey. There will be some bumps along the way and some places you will not want to go( chemo treatments) but know that when you reach your final place called (healed) it will well worth the ride. You don't need inspiration from us, you have it already those precious babies, will give you all the will power in the world. I remember each time I thought about giving up, one of them would walk in my room and I knew that was my sign from God. I have no doubt aboutwhat God can do. Your new life is just beginning because God has some work for you to do. He knows your babies and husband needs you. I will pray for you and can't wait to hear your testimony. Hit me up if you want to ask question, chat or vent. I am into my reconstructive phase, and 1 1/2 year cancer free and you will get there too. Much love and stay strong.

Just love and big hugs your way. 

I too was just diagnosed and I have 2 babies, ages 5 and 9. The team of doctors I am using are going to do neoadjuvant chemotherapy prior to double mastectomy as I'm triple positive. They are planning on using a newly approved drug called Perjeta in addition to Herceptin and another chemo drug. I have had my moments of weakness, but have decided it is best to proceed with confidence that God is guiding the doctors and He will heal me as he sees fit. I'm an administrator in the school district I work in and have always gone above and beyond the call of duty per se. I feel that I am now cherishing every moment of my life! Two weeks ago, my life was busy with worrying about the small stuff and quite honestly, I felt like I was on top of the world. Whew! How quickly life changes! We each have a story to tell and I'm using my diagnosis to share with others and bring awareness to this horrible disease! As mothers, we are strong! This is just a valley we have come to! Keep your head up and let's fight this thing! My first chemo treatment is next week, less than a month after finding my lump. Look up the song, "God will make this trial a blessing". It is my inspiration when I am weak.

JMB, you are going to do great! You are in the hardest part now -- the not knowing. It's terrible for all of us. My two were eighteen months and two years old when I was first diagnosed. Now they are eight and nine. You are going to get through it!

Try not to think about 'staging' right now -- and stay away from Dr. Google. Each bc is different, and each treatment plan is different. People in your town might be talking to you a lot about the bc experiences of friends or relatives, but that may not have anything to do with you.

The women on these boards are lifesavers -- knowledgable, caring, and supportive. We are all here for you!

mindovermatter, we must have started about the same time. First chemo was Dec 19th, was diagnosed on Dec 2nd. I am also triple positive. Have been through 2 chemo treatments so far. Just before the second one the dr examined me and my 4.8cm tumor was non palpable. I have a 4 year old adopted son who has been with me a year....he lights up my life. God is keeping me and enabling me to face each day. Though not near family or close friends due to needing to be where insurance will cover expenses, He is bringing new friends into my life and they are helping me as needed with my son. I came down with H1N1 and pneumonia right after my first treatment so this second one is going much better. I appreciate the encouragement here on this site.

Hello ammj! I am sorry that I don't have an answer to your question, but I saw that this was your first post and wanted to say hi!

I am not sure that the person who posted is still around on the boards to answer you, the last activity on this thread was back on the 20th Jan.

I am so glad you found us, but I am so sorry that you have to be here. It is the club that no one wants to join!

In saying that, there are women from all over the world who will be there if you need answers, or if you just need some support, or even a place to vent. We have lots of time and patience and understand how awful the waiting is and how scary it can be. There will also be others who are in the same situation who will come and pass on tips and ideas that may help.

If you post again in the just Diagnosed area, in a current, active thread there will be some one who can help.

Take care!

Just checking in with you to see how you are getting along now. Wondering if you've had a glimmer of hope yet.