DIEP 2013

I just wanted to update what a great idea it was to try maternity pants NYTX! The ones where the fabric at the top can fold down (under drains or incisions) or be unfolded and cover up the incision/belly button softly and comfortably. The great part is they look totally normal with the shirt over it. I got a pair today from target's clearance rack.

Can't remember who asked the other day about underwear purchases before surgery but I agree with waiting until after you're home to decide. I went commando until the drains came out. Wasted money on underwear. Now I've found that dresses are my best friend.

Congrats nihahi!! What an emotional full circle celebration!

Lucy sorry to hear about the wound.. As long as the flap is healthy and surviving you will be fine in no time :-)

thanks Bailey and butterfleye- happy to report that I showered this morning and then packed that sucker up! Yay! I did it! Just another 50 or so more times to go.....haha

Yay bailey on the three pounds. Funny thing is my refrigerator has a tight tight seal and at the moment I cannot open it. I also can't open the freezer and I have not ventured out to the store. I lost four pounds since my surgery! It's my own diep weight loss method!

Have a good day ladies!

Lucy... I spent 3 months over the summer with an open tummy, packing 3 times a day. My PS just had me send photos of the wound from beginning to closure so he could show other patients that it will heal! It will! I was eating 70 grams of protein a day. It took about 2 months for any progress to start on the healing, but once it did, it healed fast. Hang in there.

Lucy, my wound was approx 6 in by 3 inches wide. It opened up down to the muscle. I wore a comprehension garment over my packing and pad. It did leak onto the pad everyday until towards the end.

Lucy, I also had a blown out ab incision....about 7" wide by 2-3 inches across and down to muscle.....wet to dry saline packing twice a day for me....and heavy duty antibiotics to kill the little germy b@$tards trying to sabotage my procedure......eventually all cleared up, and my PS re-sutured me.......took 3.5 weeks or so to get to that point.....it is def. doable...hang in there! I used sanitary pads over my packing to keep it from leaking all over.......

no one mentioned "muscle " to me. I wonder how far down the muscle is?

Just want to say hello. I was diagnosed (confirmed) on 10/23. Having a double mastectomy with DIEP on 11/20 (less than 2 weeks from now). Here is what I wrote in "newly diagnosed" but thought I'd post here in case any of you had any tips on the DIEP or prior to surgery.

Thanks.

RHGSR :0)

______________________________

I am 37, no family history, and bf 3 babies until they were 2 yrs. Found a lump in July while still BF my son ( I have 3 young children). Kept thinking it was a clogged milk duct. Went to OB in October. Mammogram and US on 10/16 - Showed possible IDC (lump) and DCIS (other areas they saw that I was unaware of). Biopsies 10/22. Confirmed IDC and DCIS. Double mastectomy (even though only in one breast) with DIEP flap scheduled for 11/20. Then followed by 4 months of chemo.

Not sure what I am feeling. Disbelief, shock. I know the grief stages. Afraid of not traveling through them very well. Not wanting the enormity of this to hit me all at once - or when I wake up from surgery.

I noticed at the bottom of some posts were information about their cancer. I think mine is stage II (won't know about lymph nodes for sure until after surgery), HER neg, ER and PR +...not sure about the grade...maybe a 2? I will have to look at path report again.

thank you bailey6760!

Yes! It seems like I am on a roller coaster. It is crazy how quickly it all moves once diagnosed. I guess that is a good thing. Plus all of the appointments and consults and trying to tie up loose ends and get my house in order before the surgery.

I have been told it will take up to 6 weeks to recover. Is this true? Also that I can't pick up my son (he is 21 months) for 9-12 weeks? It is a hard thing to come to terms with knowing I will have to depend so much on others...

Thank you.

I am a heavier woman. Does this impact the healing process any?

Ha! I found and copied Sbel' s good hospital list. Here it is:

For those who are looking for a packing list for DIEP (Not an out-of-town trip, though, such as NOLA), I found my recommendations from an earlier post:

Here's what you definitely need to bring to the hospital:

chapstick, brush/comb, facial moisturizer, toothbrush/paste, slippers, double-walled tall beverage container (for ice water, which will be your best friend for a while), small bottle of your own shampoo (in case they let you shower or wash your hair in a sink--the hospital shampoo is worthless), reading glasses if you need them

Here's what you might want to bring. The hospital can supply some of it if you don't want to use your own:

nightgown or jamies, robe, facial wipes (a hospital washcloth will do, though) small make-up kit if you think you'd enjoy using it, headband or scarf for your hair, cell phone/charger

Here's what you SHOULD NOT bring to the hospital:

jewelry (anything at all), wallet, credit cards, anything you'd be heartbroken if it went missing, stacks of books or magazines (you won't feel like reading them)

Also...anything you take to the hospital should be thoroughly laundered or wiped down when you get home. Hospitals can be good places to pick up bacteria.

So, there are some concrete things to do. I always feel better with lists and things I can do. 

As far as getting ready at home. I think most of us say we overdid the preparation....but I also think it is part of what keeps us busy so we don't go crazy waiting. Do you have another adult living with you? Do you have other adult help nearby? 

Many of us found having a recliner at home very helpful (they can be rented if necessary), but several people were fine on the couch. Many of us have wedge pillows from bed bath and beyond, but not everybody. I had pillows of all sizes and shapes and used them to prop and tuck and lean on lol.

Some of us really loved having a shower chair, many others didn't need or want it. A few had walkers for the period of time after when you are unable to stand upright and don't feel strong.

Since you are having mx and recon you will want to make sure that things are down low (counter level) when you are on your own since raising your arms will likely take a few weeks. 

The first 48 hours, for me, in the hospital were the roughest, but not painful. Just drugged and feeling unpleasant and helpless....but manageable. After that nothing was as bad as I imagined it would be. What surprised me most was how slowly I progressed the first four weeks. I've had plenty of surgery and have always bounced right back, but this one took time. I was home after 5 days and staying home alone after 2-3 days. My mom looked in on me (and vacuumed) every day for a few minutes. I was folding laundry the first day home....but not carrying baskets or changing loads. 

As far as your children....that will be hard not picking them up. I imagine that will hurt your heart and be hard for them to understand. Try to remind yourself that it is not for forever....just for now and they will be ok. I wonder if a king size pillow across your breasts and tummy would provide enough cushion to allow some gentle snuggling. Maybe you could start practicing that with them now so they are used to the idea in two weeks? 

Throw your questions out there, we will try to answer!

Ok...it's late here. Gnight friends!

Bailey, you are the best! So giving, thoughtful, compassionate and funny, of course.

today is my first happy Boobday. I was given my new breasts one year ago today. I still have one more surgery and some tattoos to go, but the end is in sight. These girls are all mine. For all those newbies, give yourself time to heal-more than you think you need. Slow down a bit. Life will be there waiting for you, you don't need to rush things. Always remember what my wonderful DH says " your mind can be your best friend or your worst enemy and you get to choose which".

RHGSR - Good morning. Welcome to the 'rodeo' - you've come to the right place. And, it's nice to meet you.

There's nothing I can add to Bailey's fabulous list. But it's easy for me to say, as I'm 4 1/2 post surgery and I can see it all very clearly from where I stand. However, when it was all in front of me it was a different story. I knew that I was going to be okay, (I am) but I wasn't sure how to get here. I had a million questions, and I became a classic over-preparer. One of the benefits of a close surgery date is that you don't have time to mull things over too much, as far as 'what you need'. In fact one of the ladies on this board had 24 hour notice for surgery, did great, and realized that you can still be okay whether you have a perfectly clean house, or not.

Personally, pillows were my best friend during my recovery. I tested recliners (for rent) and knew that one was just a phone call away if it became necessary. It wasn't. I had a wedge pillow that I used as an anchor, and about six pillows that I arranged around the bed and on the sofa. I don't have kids, but I have three pets and I always had a pillow within reach in case a cat or dog tried to climb on me. Bailey's suggestion of a king size pillow across your lap is a really good one. As frustrating as it will be for you not to pick up your little one, it's temporary, and you can't rush your healing.

You were told it takes up to six weeks to recover? That's such a personal thing, and it also depends on how you define 'recovered'. I was surprised by how much I was able to do right of the bat (I'm BMX) as long as everything was in reach. For instance, I couldn't get my bathrobe off the hook on the back of the door - but I could do the dishes. I couldn't lift a full kettle, but I could vacuum, as long as Jim (my partner) brought the vacuum cleaner up from the basement. Before he's judged too harshly, I should point out that I actually like vacuuming - it calms me. (Also, I do it so much better than he ever could). After five weeks I went on a vacation. I was fine to lie by the pool (under an umbrella), drive a car (short distances) or ride a bike. But I couldn't lift my carry-on bag, or run through the airport. So it's a lot of trail and error, and everyone is soooooooo different.

I have no idea how weight affects recovery though. It might work in your favour as far as being hunched over though. The less skin they have to work with the tighter they pull your stomach, and the longer it takes to straighten up.

Please check in often. This thread was my life-line before and after surgery, and you couldn't be in a better place for support. These wonderful ladies understand your fears and concerns, and no question is too small, or too crazy.

Also, I loved what Christine said. 'You are going to spend the next year finding out how strong you are, and it's going to amaze you'. I realize that that might be another huge idea to absorb, but have faith. Many good things come out of this experience. One step at a time.

Janet

Happy Boobday Marty! Your DH sounds like a wise man. I like your advice about not rushing. The one thing that has brought me through my journey since being diagnosed in February is to stay in the present moment. Try not to look ahead too much, but just focus on getting through each day. When I started chemo, I just told myself , okay, I'm going to start this and it will be over before I know it. I never counted down my weeks. The same with surgery. Just keep living each day as it comes and each of these phases will be over before you know it. That's one gift that getting older gives us: time really flies (especially if you are not focused on the finish line).

RHG.....Where are you having your surgery??? There might be someone on the thread who has the same surgeons/hospitals, that could give you more specific advice too. Don't be surprised to find a variety of doctor's protocols....we have found there are many, many different approaches to the how's and when's....but we seem to all get to the same place of results. Your doctor may have different rules than some of ours, or they may be the same....nothing for you to fret over. How "hard" or "easy" the recovery process is, is very, very different for each of us too. The common denominator seems to be accepting that it does take time and patience, and trying to rush things/ overdo things will not be helpful. You WILL need help, your daily routine WILL be different, there WILL be things you CANNOT do....NONE of these restrictions will be forever!!!!!!!!!

You've been given some wonderful support and advice by some great ladies....bailey is AN AWESOME LADY!!!!!! Hope you are finding the info helpful. One thing that I noticed hasn't yet been touched on is sleep/anxiety issues. You likely feel like the world has severely tilted and spinning in the opposite direction at the moment, and a zillion thoughts are racing around in your mind. Emotions are running over like Niagara Falls in full flood.... Many of us found that not being able to sleep, or keep the anxiety from getting the best of us difficult. With little ones to care for, this is probably a challenge already. If you are struggling with sleep/anxiety, I hope you let your docs know, and do not hesitate to take some meds like ativan to help calm you enough to get some sleep, and function during the day.

It was a long time ago for me, but my daughter was 1 1/2 at the time of my dx and mx and chemo. I can assure you, she doesn't remember those days, not being able to pick her up, or snuggle her and not feeling well enough to be running around with her during chemo.....that was very hard on me, physically and emotionally...it had no long term impact on her. That may sound harsh, like I don't "get" the sense of loss of mothering, but I do get it, and I can tell you, I went through it, she went through it...got through it just fine. She had been a very, very tiny premmie, and I was 100% hands on with her, 24/7...at the time of my dx. Bailey's suggestion of "practice snuggling" are awesome! Your energy at this time needs to be in recovering from surgery and fighting cancer. Being there as a mom, as your children grow, is the biggest, most important "mothering" thing you could possibly do for them!

marty....."HAPPY BOOBDAY"!!!!!!!.....You certainly have been "down the road" of recon...potholes and all. The finish line is getting close....you deserve nothing but happiness.

bailey....glad to hear you and hubby had a wonderful night out....hope there are many, many more!