In shock

Thank you for all the kind words and condolences, love you guys - you are 'extended family' to me - we've shared a lot together.



Funeral will probably be on Friday, I will know more after meeting with funeral home this afternoon.



Take good care ((()))

Websister, wish we could all come and give you a group hug. Your Mum will always remain safe in your heart x

Bevlee, lovely to hear from you, you keep on with those pictures, well done.

I joined a choir tonight  loved every minute, we are preparing for a Xmas concert. Bingo tomorrow then Latin American dancing Thursday, that's if I can get DH motivated !!

Hope ALL of you improving every day. X

lizylu....Sounds like you're well on the way to getting through most of your tx....Good to hear you have found onco's you feel comfortable with. Having confidence and "comfortableness" is so important to making this journey more doable. I am a former OT, what is your area of nursing interest? Yep...we are an interesting bunch of ladies!!!!

Edi...Now THAT's what I like to hear!!! Sounds like a wonderful week for you!!! Go dancing without hubby, if you have to. I'm sure you'll have a partner PDQ, and I bet hubby never, ever skips another night of dancing!!!!!!. 

maria...hope the dentist went ok,,gee, sure hoping a new position turns up for hubby soon!

hugs going out to all......tired fingers tonight...so going to end here. 

Lizylu, hi and welcome, please keep on here, we TN are a bit unusual on here but we ALL have the same issues.
I have visited various TN forums but LOVE my warrior sisters on here more.
Here in England with TN they seem to do the surgery/chemo/rads route for us all.
Met lovely lady the other day and she is SIX years out and fit and fabulous !!
She did more for me in half an hour than all the TN forums.
Hope they sort you out soon with the rest of your journey. I had 25 rads and my friend 33 our Docs call it belt and braces to cover all the bases, so if you are advised to have it don't be afraid.

Nihahi, DH still being a pain so I had already decided to dance on my own but thanks  He will do exactly what you said, just sick of the confrontations.Have a new dress and red shoes just like Dorothy in the wizard of Oz so look out yellow brick road Edi on her way.

Has anyone else found that " C " has changed them completely ? I no longer put up with people who depress me. If I feel people are taking the pxxs I now tell them, even DH. Can't believe the people pleasing cxxp I have done for the last sixty odd years.
Rant over.

Off to Bingo for a flippin good laugh, hope you are all ok.

Websister, big cyber ((( HUG ))) X

Up early, having a nice cup of coffee with Siamese baby purring in my lap.

Welcome, Lizylu! You have found a most amazing group of women here. Seems you've got things under control, and are doing well.

Benny, we miss you! How are all the animals doing?

Traii, you are getting on with life, it seems? Happy for you that the bc battle is in your rearview mirror. Let us know when we can start knitting for Baby no. 2, okay?

Dakota, always thinking of you too.

Momof2, you are such a good wife spoiling your DH like that. Years ago I used to make meals ahead whenever I had to go away, but stopped doing it when the kids left home, and 'unspoiled' DH. He doesn't mind - there's always frozen leftovers these days because I stuff everything in the freezer before we are tempted to eat unnecessary second helpings - LOL. Happy that you feel better now that you have a surgery date. Uncertainty is the pits, eh?

Edi, you sound well and feisty this morning! I'm so impressed with the choir singing. Good for you! Used to have a church choir years ago, and it was always such fun picking pieces for the choir, and preparing for the Christmas performance - enjoy!!! About the big C changing us - that is a sure thing. You cannot go through something so life-changing, and come out the same person on the other side. It definitely seperates the wheat from the chaff, so to speak - LOL.

Adagio, are you back from your S.A. trip yet? How was it?

Got very good news. DS' fiancee, a South African citizen, received her multiple entry visa from Immigration Canada at last! It was very stressful, because she needs that to get into Canada when they return from honeymoon. I had visions and nightmares of her being turned around at Customs, and being put on the first plane back to S.A. in handcuffs, and my son devastated, and unable to do anything to help his new bride - lol. Poor girl was a nervous wreck, and we are all so relieved. Phew!!

Edi....you are both too funny....and so very wise!!!! Love the new red dancing shoes...hope you wear them out and buy many more pairs!!!! So wonderful to "see" the sparkle in your words now. I don't think cancer has changed you...I think it has stripped away the "role playing" that we all used to do, and the real you is now shining brightly for the whole world to see. There is nothing "fake" about bc, or what we do to get through it....I think many woman find the "veteran mindset" of being "real", much more to their liking. Just think of what a wonderful example you are giving to the woman in your family, and to other woman you meet. Hubby isn't being "abused by neglect"....he'll come around...it just takes men longer to "evolve"....!

momof2...nothing wrong with spoiling someone you love (better to give than receive idea)....the thing is....as long as they appreciate the effort, and recognize it as something special you are choosing to do for them, it's a positive thing. As opposed to expecting it to be the norm to be pampered or catered too......big diff. IMHO.

I've actually lost a "good friend" because of my recon choice...I'm sure, if we'd known each other during my initial dx -sx-tx....she'd have been on the "lost" list too. She keeps in touch now, but what I share with her now is just superficial stuff, I have tried repeatedly to try to explain to her how her words/thoughts have been hurtful or at the very least, not helpful....she either just can't get it, or chooses to dismiss my point of view...not my problem anymore. She is not a "listener".....she'll ask the same questions over and over in an email, and no matter how many times or how many ways you answer her....she'll just keep asking. Makes you feel like she's just going through the motions.

So glad you're feeling more "empowered".....there will still be tough days, ahead...but yep...knowing the plan always seems to help. 

Traii....hope it's not too hard on you having multiple new babies in the family...from the description of your little guy, not sure the world would be able to cope with another mini-Traii! Glad to hear you're looking forward to getting back to work....still part-time?? Lack of sleep is horrible...it can make the world a much "darker place" to live in. Have you discussed it with your doc??? I have found sooooo much help in a very short time, taking just a bit of melatonin every night...and we all know how little I used to sleep!!!!! You're probably starting to dig out your summer stuff....I'm going to have to dig out the mittens and sweaters soon!

gotta dash.....hugs to everyone I've missed. As Dakota says....MWAH 

liefie - I just got back yesterday from my trip. One week in beautiful Stellenbosch (my husband was working at the University) and a week in Cape Town. Did all the touristy stuff and tons of walking. We stayed in an apartment right on Beach Road in Sea Point - it was a fabulous view from the apartment and the waves were spectacular. Unfortunately the weather did not co-operate - it was very cold and wet - but coming from Vancouver - no big deal really. I thoroughly enjoyed the history of S.A. - fascinating! I think I have gained about 10 pounds - so much wonderful food and I did indulge in the lovely South African red wines. Oh well - back to the healthy diet and not so much red wine. 

edi - glad you have found a choir. I sing in 2 choirs - although I did drop one of them while going through treatments - looking forward to getting back to singing - it is good for the soul and it is quite liberating.

lizylu - welcome to the forum. I am also triple negative. I go to see my MO tomorrow for a 3 month check up - hoping all will be well. Glad you only have one more chemo to go - that is quite a milestone!

Hi everyone:)

Lizylu, I'm another TN lady! Welcome to the club nobody really wanted to join.



Ed, group singing is the Bees-knees! My group has totally carried me through the roughest times on this cancer trip!



I find the drumming circle I do once a week has a similar effect.



You have that connection with the rest of the group, and because you are focussed it makes you ground yourself right in the present.



You cannot dwell on what has gone before, nor stress about what the future might hold. You only have the NOW, and that is very healing.



Websister, I haven't been on the site for a few days,..... So so sorry to hear about your mom. That's something we all have to experience at some point I guess.



When I was back visiting my parents in August, my mum is having these episodes of losing conciousness for a minute or so. Dad reckons her heart misses a few beats every now and then. She is in known heart failure, and his wish for her is that she just won't come round from one of these, one day.



It is tough, knowing that I might have held her and hugged her for the last time .....



For myself, well I am keeping on with my walking. I have a pedometer from the recovery group program at bcscf Calgary, and I'm supposed to aim for 10,000 steps a day. That's about 8km! A lot of steps. I'm also eating healthy and lost at least 7lb since my vacation!



I'm developing a return to work plan, to start week of Nov 18.

Pleased and kind of nervous!!!

Hi

Lizylu, glad that you are happy here on the BEST forum EVER. The great part is that we can give our opinions and advice and also chatter away like we are all having coffee together.
BC isnt the only thing in our life even though at first it seems like it, all overwhelming and heavy.
Then as we walk that path it lifts and as the se's ease there is light at the end.
Last chemo ! what a milestone. I cried at mine  purely because I would miss all the wonderful people I had met there and their kindness and understanding.
Rads are a walk in the park in comparison, going every week day the worst part but be kind to yourself. Play favourite music in the car on the way.
Afterwards rest if you can and pamper yourself. lots of Aquacream or similar. Will be thinking of you today.
Please call me Edi by the way
Love that you are a doggie person, they are so wonderful and I swear they know what is going on in our bodies.X

Adagio, I have my first annual check  up with surgeon on Monday and like you bit apprehensive.
Will be thinking of you. x

Maria, hope all going well re hubby's job ? plus the dentist appointment too.
How lovely that you too are feeloing " normal " isn't it amazing ? Right through treatment we think we will feel yuk for ever, then it is as if someone waves a wand and things change
My DH is freaked with the la di da bit too LOL. x

Morwenna,Singing certainly made me feel liberated and made me breath better. Drumming circle sounds fantastic !
Sorry to hear about your Mum's heart problems.
Back to work soon, I am jealous ! I miss the interaction with people. As DH has retired I daren't go back but if BC hadn't hit me I would have probably have continued waiting tables for ever. X

Traii, forgot to put hope DH has negative results from mole. Poor love must be besides himself with worry.
Glad my cyber baby heading into the " normal " zone too X

Benny, glad you found a decent bra, will make a note of that for my BC telephone buddies as we are compiling a list of helpful things to get new ladies through everything. Got to riding school !! Going to book a lesson very soon. They were so lovely and on our local news last night they had a report about " Galloping Grannies " a lot of older ladies have started up and were raving about the health benefits on TV so here goes X

Nihahi and Liefie, hope you have a glorious and wonderful day/night also anyone I haven't mentioned.

Off to get my red shoes ready for tonight, cross everything for me please  X

Edi thanks I do love my pooch tho I swear the vet just put him on Prozac not sure if it was meant for me or not..... Only 4 dollars a month I just might steal it '!!! Need a picture of those red shoes !!!!! Lizlu love the screen name - welcome

Websister - thoughts are with u, good luck tomorrow

Traii - so good to hear from u, sad to hear about DH tho!!

Websister love ur animal stories !!!

Forget who volunteer that shoe but I would love it !!! Told cockroach to change his mailing address. Also told him I had plans for tomorrow night he HAD to take the kids.... Don't really have plans if I could sit in a parking lot somewhere and sleep I would be happy. Told him its time to start living like a divorced couple... I need a life !!!! Hope everyone is still feeling great !!!! Gotta run ... Working..... Muah !!!!

Websister, thinking of you especially tomorrow.

dakota....I think it was momof2 who offered her hubby's shoe....if it's not available...I know where there is a good stash of rocks!!!! Good for you....even if you DO end up napping in the car....it's the right thing for you to do.

traii....gosh, get some help for that sleeping, ok??? Hope hubby's biopsy comes back soon, and clean.

edi...Pics of the shoes!!!! Or maybe, a cake with red shoes on top!!!! Swing those hips, chickee!!!!

fyi...I am going to attend the funeral tomorrow for websisters Mom, and will be giving a card signed from "your friends on the In Shock thread"....so, we all will be there for her.

Ah yes Dakota...My DH has the size 16D....and my doxie, Oskar, is on prozac because of separation anxiety. I do not give it to him every day because I think he is better. But so far he chewed up the blinds, drapes, seat belts, leashes, and custom bed skirt. The blinds and seat belts were the most $$$, but we love him so much. I have been on prozac for years and it truly helps. I must confess, I love getting them for $4...they are a life saver.

So as I make my way to surgery day 10/23 I have my days of should I or shouldn't I with this BMX and reconstruction. I had rads last year on the left side and the PS thinks the skin looks healthy, but you never know. The unknown is causing anxiety. I want to be healed enough for my DD wedding in May 2014 and be able to get back to my little cottage on the Oregon Coast. Today I went for the BRCA testing and counseling. Wow, I have a degree from Med Coll of Ga, but today was info overload. Yada yada if I am positive (probably not) the ramifications for my daughter...Yikes!

Trying to come up with a list of things I need for the BMX...I do not have anything that buttons down the front.

Oh dear, what have I signed myself up for? Well, I have to get this D#$% thing cut out.

Dakota....I certainly hope you get the cockroach out of your life...look what you have been through without his support. Squish!! and be done with him... ((HUGS))

Just call me Jenifer

Just got back from MO appointment - she felt both breasts and lymph nodes in armpits and collarbone area for lumps - all feels fine! She also checked my spine for pain because she said that is a favourite area for breast cancer to settle - she said that there would be a gnawing pain if there was cancer there and no medication would ease the pain - that would be awful! No bloodworm, scans or anything else so I guess it is good.



Liefie - I too love relaxing breakfasts! I am guessing that S.Africa will be quite lovely in December - a great time for a wedding. I got married December 18th!



Edi - my surgeon discharged me a long time ago - in fact I only saw her once after the lumpectomy and that was it! Do you get any bloodwork or scans done?



Tonight I am going to a choral workshop - it is focusing on breathing technique and evidently will incorporate some yoga moves - should be interesting.



Liefie and Morwenna - thanks for reminding me about the step counting - I should get mine out especially since I did put on about 7 pounds while I was away!



Nihahi - how lovely that you can attend the funeral of Websister's Mom.