what's the best thing people have said to you?
Comments
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"you have every reason to still be tired. It's only months ago you finished 8 months treatment. Be patient. Things will get better, and this is not a bad sign. It's what we expect".
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@ new_direction:
That IS great. That's the kind of stuff I like to hear. -
"I'll love you no matter what - even if you have no hair or fingernails." - Partner
"I pray for you everyday, baby." - Dad
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As I drove to the hospital for lumpectomy, the song playing on the radio was a song that I haven't heard in decades. It was GHOSTBUSTERS! As petrified as I was, I burst out laughing uncontrollably. I went into surgery singing I AIN'T FRAID OF NO GHOST!! Lololol. It's my new theme song.
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I wanted to meet with BS the evening before my surgery date and while discussing with him I was telling him why I was worried about my 5 yr old and my DH told my BS that our son was very much a mommy's boy, so the surgeon smiled very sweetly and said "your son will still be a mommy's boy atleast till he is 25 yr old and wants to marry a girl, after which we will never know"
and when my BS was taking out my mediport, I asked him if I have to make any follow up appointments with him and then he said , You never ever have to come and see me again. Go live your life your fullest and don't blame me or say lymphedema, when you are 80 and not able to lift your arms all the way through.
My RO when she came in to see me for the first time said I have reviewed your path and you do know that your prognosis is awesome , right ? and we are probably overtreating you, but again we love to see women grow old and stay alive till atleast 80.
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I have had several dreams over the last few years, before my wife's diagnosis that had me waking up in a sweat.
In the dreams, I wasn't with my wife. Either I had never met her, or it didn't work out.
Each time I was devastated... only to be relieved it was just a dream. I once asked my wife if she thought she married the right man. Her reply: "How could you ever wonder that. Look at our girls".
Then came the diagnosis.
I began thinking that maybe the dreams of being without my wife were a premonition that I would lose her.
I have had some recurring dreams about places I never saw----only to see them later. Years later. Since this began happening, i have wondered if some of my more intense dreams had true meaning. But that's another conversation.
After wondering if my dreams meant I would lose my wife, I had another dream: I was standing near a figure atop a mount. I did not know if this was a man or spirit----but it silently looked out over a mass of people below where we were. I just stared at it. I could not recognize the face. He turned to me slowly and looked right into my face and he said only this: "She is NOT leaving you".
Then I woke. -
An aunt who was just diagnosed herself last Spring upon seeing my wife for the 1st time since my wife's diagnosis said to me: "she looks SO good... everything is going well for her".
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That's great, SaturnRing! I love the positivity.
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Colt45 -
You sound so in love with your wife. It makes me smile to read your posts here. (If only we all had husbands like you!) Thanks for sharing on this thread, and may you and your wife enjoy many, many more happy years together!
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I am humbled and somewhat embarrassed by a very kind person who wrote a wonderful thing to me the other day. I do not feel much like a superstar, rather I am at a loss that there is not more I can do to ensure my family's safety. But I DO love the positivity of the message:
" I'm thinking your wife was treated with the very best in medical advances, has a superstar husband, and with that type of treatment and love, she will experience a very long healthy life!" -
@lifeiswonderful:
My wife and my family are my world. Everything I am and have is invested in them.
Thank you for your kindness. -
I had my tile floor repaired a few days ago. The lady who came wAs Spanish ( glad to see a women doing a labor job $$) I told her about my cancer and before she left she asked to say a pray for me. I said yes and she held her hand and I put mine in hers. We closed eyes and she said the pray in Spanish. I felt calm holding this strangers hands. When it was over and I opened my eyes there were tears in her eyes.... I was moved!
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@Tracy516: Sounds like a special encounter. There is talk often of angels being placed in our paths at critical moments. Perhaps she is your's.
God bless. -
Two weeks ago I missed Wednsday night Bible Study at my church. I rarely miss. The next day 2 different people called to tell me, that the speaker that night had mentioned me by name. She talked about my great faith. She said, I may mention what the doctors have said, but I never own the cancer.
That really blessed me. From the beginning of dx I asked people to pray that I be a blessing to others and that I glorify God.
Paula -
I had an amazing experience on Friday. As I was being wheeled into the OR for the last stage of the reconstruction surgery (exchange), a nurse in the OR asked me, "Did you have breast cancer?" When I said yes, she whispered to me, "Me too. I just had the same exchange surgery with this same plastic surgeon a month ago. She's the best! And I will take good care of you." We started exchanging "What chemo regimen did you do?" etc, soul-sisters. I was literally smiling as they gave me the anesthesia.
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"You've come through an awful experience. Now... NOW... is not the time to be afraid to live."
A friend from these boards told me the above. I like the idea that we've 'come through'. -
This is something some friends did, not what they said.
I'm on a drug combo of Afinitor and Aromisin (bone mets). One of the SEs of the Afinitor is loss of appetite, made worse by taste changes. In other words, not very much tastes good but since I 'm not hungry who cares? The result is a 20 pound weight loss (and I needed to lose maybe 2 or 3 pounds). So one friend who was on a visit to the U.S. brought back a giant pack of Thomas' English Muffins for me since she knows I like them (you can't get them in Israel). Another friend, knowing that anything with sugar tastes bitter to me, made me some sugar-free muffins. I can taste both of these, I can even enjoy them a bit, and I can enjoy the love behind these gifts.
Leah
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It's been a while since I read the posts in here. Thanks everyone for sharing. It always makes me smile.
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I love the people with wisdom enough to just say "I"m sorry you had to go through that." And then carry on and treat me normal. NORMAL. I just wanted normal and no one telling me stories of a friend of a friend who this or that....fuck that shit....just give me normal.
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rubylily2-I sooo agree! I feel some treat me with kid gloves and are well meaning but...one of my co-workers said I was "wonder woman". I said no, I am not wonder woman, I am just me! I really want ME back.
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Normal is my favorite word!
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I just delivered the toast as we celebrated my parents' 50th wedding anniversary this weekend and a friend said to me: "we will be doing this for YOU in 40 years".
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My wife and I were doing cardio side by side at the Wellness Center last week. A staff member walked by and my wife pointed her out and said "that's my nurse here. She had a positive node 15 years ago."
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Colt, I love it! Thanks for sharing.
Paula
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I've taken a long time to start feeling better both physically and mentally after treatment. It has been very depressing at times because I've felt nothing happened and I feared what it meant - if the disease was still there since I felt so bad. I just went to a follow up 2 weeks ago. I had begun working - it took almost 2 months for me to start feeling a little comfortable at work. I really didn't believe that it would be possible for me to return to the same kind of work. The last 3-4 weeks I have begun recognising some of my "old" self. I've missed that energy and vitality so much. I am so thankful it is starting to come back. I am so thankful of the help and support I have experienced during my slow progress. When I walked in 2 weeks ago my onc said: "you look SO MUCH better than last time I saw you" (that was back in january). I just became so happy.
If someone else is struggling to regain strength I just want to say: don't give up. It does get better although it may take a while. Don't rush yourself. I have listened to my body all the way. I still sleep during the day. I don't want to put any pressure on myself during this recovery fase. Finally it's starting to pay off
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i had cancer it was past .its is a big difference its not the something i am carrying around its not my identity.i do need to correct people sometimes
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My friend said "Its whats on the inside that counts
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My hematologist told me that my breast cancer chemotherapy has put my blood cancer into remission!
The other "best thing" said recently was by my own words, as I handed over a bag containing my wig, prosthetic and a bunch of mastectomy bras ... "I've finished with these" ...... I paused, then said, with a sense of wonder that it was the first time I had remotely felt like this: I'VE FINISHED WITH BREAST CANCER!!!
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Bump.
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Bump
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