Do you shop? Let me explain

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Anonymous
Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
edited June 2014 in Stage III Breast Cancer

So, this is a recurrence for me, 1 year after my initial diagnosis. So, I'm scared and realized that some of the things that I do for fun involve shopping, decorating, planning and other future oriented activities.  I can't do these with any level of confidence though after all I beleived the doc who said this is over for you after I completed treatment for the 2a cancer that was origianlly a stage 0. Also, as I am not a good candidate for reconstruction, I will be shaped very differently than I am currently (I have accepted this but its not going to be a good look - plus size, big shoulders, no boobs, big belly). 

How do you move forward? Do you shop? Thanks.

V

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  • Momine
    Momine Member Posts: 7,859
    edited August 2013

    Yes, I shop. I figure that I will dang well look good and smell good as long as I am here. Same would hold for a house. Enjoy having it look good.

    Before cancer, I was not much of a shopper, but now I am far more likely to just buy those shoes, if I really love them.

    I don't have any boobs either, but I see that as MORE opportunity to look for that perfect shirt. It is also an opportunity to buy foobs and perfect foob gear. 

    I bought myself a nie present after every single chemo. Zero regrets.

    So, I am really sorry you are dealing with this #$@*& again. But all the more reason to do the things you enjoy and that bring you fun and pleasure.

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  • wrenn
    wrenn Member Posts: 2,707
    edited August 2013

    I haven't even been staged yet (bilateral MX next week) and I hesitate to buy certain things. I have started to think about shopping in terms of whether it would be hard for my daughter to get rid of when she has to clean out my apt.

    I also signed for a 2 year mobile phone contract and felt at the time that it was optimistic. Morbid I know but this whole thing is scary and would be especially scary having a recurrence at a year. I hope you are given some good news about treatment options soon and that your outlook will change. I guess it never really goes away though. :-(

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  • cmdczc
    cmdczc Member Posts: 75
    edited August 2013

    Hi!  I remember the feeling of whether or not to get a one year subscription to a journal, let alone a 3 year subscripton!  However, it has now been just over 3 1/2 years since diagnosis.   I never  really enjoyed shopping, but, I did buy small things for myself if it made me feel better, especially during active treatment.   So, I would plan, and decorate, and buy those things that bring you pleasure;  it is all a part of the enjoyment of life!

    Also, please look into getting some prostheses, some are light weight, and some of the bras are very nice.  They made me feel better too!

    Take care,

    Cindy (stage IIIa)

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited August 2013

    Thank you all Cindy, Momine and wrenn.  I appreicate it.  My new dx is probably 3c, so needless to say scared sh$%less.

    Thank you.  I did get a 1 year subscription ather than a 2 year mag subscription.  I can't beleive I had to do that.  I am 47.

    Ok, wills top hyperventilating. I am told it is treatable and curable. And so it will be.

    xoxo

    V

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  • exbrnxgrl
    exbrnxgrl Member Posts: 12,424
    edited August 2013

    HVV,

    There are no guarantees with bc, but many of us (even stage IV) keep on going. I am just at the two year point and my life is pretty much normal. I think of myself a bit more than I used to and try to do things I enjoy, including shopping and collecting antique purses. Although I was afraid to plan too far out initially, I do so now without hesitancy. I am happily researching what to do at port calls on a two week cruise I'll be taking to New Zealand and Australia in late December, though I made sure to buy the travel insurance that covered pre existing medical conditions :) It seems hard to believe, and it's not always easy but despite bc, life goes on. Take care.

    Caryn

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited August 2013

    exbronx girl, thank you!  I'm a current brnx girl: riverdale

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  • exbrnxgrl
    exbrnxgrl Member Posts: 12,424
    edited August 2013

    HVV,

    My oldest and dearest friend lives in Riverdale. I was in NJ for several weeks last month (mom was ill and passed away), but I did go to Riverdale and spent the day with her. We grew up in the Pelham Pkwy. area. I have lived in CA for more than 20 years, but am still a Bronx girl at heart. I also turned my CA born younger dd in to a rabid Yankees fan :)

    Caryn

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited August 2013

    Caryn,

    I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm from Unionport originally near CAstle Hill and Parkchester.

    Glad to hear that you raised dd right.

    V

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  • carolpr56
    carolpr56 Member Posts: 241
    edited August 2013

    Hi, v! I'm a shopper, lol! Love it! Now I 'm shopping on the net for post-sx clothes, but I get what you mean! I suggest u consult with a seamstress/fitter -even a plus sized friend who sews. Someone who can alter what's possible and recommend new styles for your new shape. Things that you might have avoided before might work well now, like cowl necklines?



    I try to go on like I'm gonna still be here 30 years from now, lol!

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited August 2013

    Thanks Carol.  Good idea.  Know anyoen in metro NYC?

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  • carolpr56
    carolpr56 Member Posts: 241
    edited August 2013

    Sorry, no!

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  • Momine
    Momine Member Posts: 7,859
    edited August 2013

    My dog wears a "I love NY" bandanna, in Athens :) Dh is an old Bronx boy and I lived in various NYC boroughs for years.

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited August 2013

    HVV  I'm sorry you are facing a recurrence and all the crap that goes with it. I always loved to shop.  I call it retail therapy.  My next door neighbor lives most of the year in NYC upper east side. They come down here to the beach on weekends and often bring me and DH some delicious NY Pastrami Sandwiches from a NY Deli.Wink

    image

    Barb


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  • carolpr56
    carolpr56 Member Posts: 241
    edited August 2013

    sounds like the perfect person to ask about a specialized seamstress/tailor! bound to be one or two in NYC ; )

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited August 2013

    thank you all.

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  • gonegirl
    gonegirl Member Posts: 1,871
    edited August 2013

    HVV, I'm so sorry you are going through this again.

    Exbrnxgrl, sorry to hear about your mom. Saturday it wa 5 years since my mom suddenly passed.

    I need to take up shopping instead of eating. That'll be better for my waist line. :-)

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