Great saying about depression

HI Ladies - ENOUGH ALREADY - can we drop this subject !!!! If my sister and I have a fight- we just agree to disagree on a subject and don't mention it again. Barbe, sorry but I do think BC can be cured if you have not had a recurrence in 5 years. The reason I think there are recurrences many years later, is that they cannot remove all the breast tissue - unlike something like bowel cancer for instance. I know people who have had the BC gene and had double mastectomies as a prevention cure, and they still got BC. If there are any breast cells hanging around they can mutate again. That is just my personal opinion. We have all been so loving and supportive on this thread that I can't figure out how it all went so volatile so quickly.

Personally I did not join the thread because I was particularly depressed. I have had my down times, as we all have. I wallowed in it for a day- cried for hours- and felt much better afterwards. I found the thread searching for Kate33 when I was in agony with my implants. I stayed because I liked you all- you are such a lovely bunch. Please can we get past this?

Hi Barbe- partly because logically they cannot tell if there is one lurking cell- can only see it when it gets bigger- but more importantly they are trained to report like that for medico legal reasons to cover their back.

Maddie, thanks for validating my "one cell" theory!! Always wondered why they stopped using the term remission....

I've been reporting a lot of "free movies" theads lately!!!! Definitely a slow system in the last couple of days.

Debbie, I hope you don't mean leaving the thread. I really enjoy this thread and have found hope here from everyone. I was really in a dark place when I came here and now even tho not much has changed I can see the light. 

I understand both your points of view. But I don't think it is an either or matter. It is a difference of opinion. (with some personality traits rubbing the wrong way)

Anyway, I hope people hang in here. 

hopefulhealing, it was good to hear the progress you are making. Sorry it is such a long story. I remember my bs saying this would just be a blip on my radar screen, well, I would like her to go through this process and then call it a blip.

maddie, I haven't been on the computer lately. I have "only" been taking the AI for a year. But now they have taken me off it again. I am having nerve pain in my hands. I am not suppose to be doing any repetitive movements. (LOL) I am only to do my exercises and massage. I am seeing a hand therapist. She has me using a heating pad and then icing after the exercise and before bed. Plus I get to wear some lovely compression gloves. I will be seeing my MO on Friday, she wants to have a "chat" (her word, not mine)

barbe, you are right sometimes reality sucks, but sometimes it can be absolutly beautiful. (sometimes both at the same time) 

Deb, any breast cancer above DCIS is considered "invasive" as it is not in the milk glands which are contained. I don't recall arguing about your stats, but if I did, it was probably because you had DCIS stage 3, which is impossible. DCIS is stage 0 (recently they have considered micromets to be stage 1). If you had any kind of cancer outside the glands, then you are IDC. IDC trumps DCIS.

I am glad that your Onc has validated what I said and I appreciate you posting that information.

As far as I know, my stats are in my profile where they've been for almost 5 years! I used to post them but confused a LOT of people with my very, very rare breast cancer, Papillary. When I was first diagnosed there was only ONE item in a Google search with Papillary in it (not here!)!!! Ladies confused it with Papilomas which are benign and it scared them. I had a double mastectomy and thus no rads. My surgeon then had emergency heart surgery and I didn't get to see an Oncologist for 9 months. It was too late to do chemo, but as I am ER+ it was explained to me that ER+ is a slow growing cancer and doesn't respond well to chemo, so it would have been my choice anyway. With my horrid cardiac history (see above) I would have said no anyway and my cardiologist was thrilled. (An increase in survival rate of 3-5% is not enough for me to do that to my body anyway!) As for an AI, none was offered. My doctor said to "save the big guns until next time". (I know now that grade affects the growth speed of cancer cells in ER+ testing, but for some strange reason, no one know why, my cells weren't graded, or they can't find the info!) All in all, as my Onc said, "You really fell into the cracks, didn't you?"

I stayed off this thread for over a week to yield to the respect I had for justagirl. Then PM's urged me not to leave a thread where I had done so much good. I got to post my feelings on the issue for the first time. I am NOT a "Queen" I am just someone who is living with breast cancer!

Ok... Time to move on ... This thread is to help people struggle with depression ...

No, Scottie, this thread is for people WITH depression! Big difference. Here we are allowed to spill our guts out and find out that others have depression and sad things in their lives as well. That normally amounts to gloom, if not doom.

So, Scottie, why are you depressed?? And Joanne, what about you? (Note the Mods have named this thread for those WITH depression.)

Good grief, ladies. BCO is all about HELPING each other!!!!!



I don't think a one of us logs on to 'fight' or bicker. We have enough stuff happening in real life to not have to to 'cyber bully' or fight or bicker or misconstrue words.



I started reading the depression forum to see how to counteract any depression I might face in the coming months after I've exhausted my reconstruction project which has been going on since my dx in Feb of 2012. My coping mechanism was to dive in head first, and totally 100% focus on the recon part, not the part that would/might remind me that I have bc again!



I also didn't want to say ANYTHING on this forum just because it appears that the dread is the dx a second time for many - or so it would seem when reading the posts. That gave me a double edged sword of being fearful of getting depressed b/c of the 2nd dx and having no treatments to focus and 'be busy' on, but also of depressing anyone further in the fear that it could happen again.



We each walk this walk a little different than the other. Our mindsets, our goals, our focus is different. Our daily habits differ greatly with each other whether or not they impact bc or not - so why wouldn't our thoughts differ?



I was fascinated reading the posts, must have skimmed one or two as I suddenly got stopped in the flow of reading when I heard discord and suddenly the forum seemed to take a turn that would certainly depress even the un-depressed!!!



So in Scottie's defense, and not to diss Barbe or the dear lady from Down Under, Debbie but to truly ditto Joanne - can you all please agree that semantics might not be the rule of order at this point and that maybe getting back to the reason we all go on BCO - to help others while helping ourselves through this journey we never wanted to sign up for, continue?



My dad is in hospice, my smoke screen of denial might be ending, and now what? I'd like to be able to get back as a lurker and just read without thinking you all are about to fly off and punch each other!!! Whether it's physical or cyber - a punch is a punch. How about a hug instead?



Hugs



Catie

Amen

I think we are all feeling frustrated and sad after reading the back and forth here  

We hope you all can truly move forward, be real, authentic, open and supportive, and not get wrapped up in semantics.

Breastcancer.org has thousands of pages of information if anyone would like to read, and let's leave this particular discussion for emotional support, as it has been for the last 3 years. 

Sending you all cyber hugs, and encouragement for a new start.

Thank you mods, I totally agree also, finished.

Hi ladies - thanks for the info on nipples hopefulhealing. Have a little while to think about it before I can have it done. Good luck with the tatooing.

Mac  - I think that they have found evidence of Lyme disease is fabulous news!! Sounds weird to say that, but it could explain a lot of your sympoms - tingling nerves,sore joints, breathing problems etc. I do hope they find that has been the cause of some of your symptoms, as it can be treated with a long course of antibiotics. Serious hikers in the UK always wear their socks over their trousers. I always thought it looked really nerdy, but have since discovered that it is to prevent ticks- the cause of Lyme disease- from crawling up your leg under your trousers!!

Catie2013 - I am so sorry to hear about your Dad. Must be an awful time for you. I have the greatest respect for Hospice - I think they are a wonderful organisation. I personally know someone who was a fund raiser for Hospice. She said she raised the money as if she was raising it for a member of her family. Anything that made their last few days easier was fine with her.

Thank you mods, but.............is it ok for Barbe1958 to call someone a troll because they have been reading here and not posting until Barbe finally drove her to do it with her remarks back in the beginning of July? And is it ok for Barbe to demand to know if a person (and it was the same person she called a troll) is depressed?

I too, thought this thread was to support and HELP each other with depression and how it affected our everyday lives. We used to share the good and the bad. So many woman have dropped this thread in the last year  - but it wasn't because they died.

I just don't understand how Barbe could of posted what she did back in the beginning of July that there is no cure for breast cancer and if  we don't die of something else first, it BC will probably kill us.  This just seems so inappropriate for a thread about depression.  Those are not exactly two uplifting statement................

And in the past, we haven't always talked about depression, but anxiety and general stress.

chabba - fine

Thinking of you with your procedure tomorrow, chabba. I pray for a quick and painless biospy and a negative (benign!) result. You are not alone, sweetie!

Edited to change mac's name to chabba!! Then found out that chabba's biopsy will be tomorow (Monday).