DIEP 2013

I can relate to so many of you here. When I was first diagnosed I wanted both breasts gone. They wouldn't do it. So for two years I was a uniboober. I was scheduled to have prophylactic mx on left and bilateral diep in July 2009. In June of 2009 I found a recurrence so had to cancel surgery. I went through rads and in July 2010 I was finally given prophylactic mx and was told I was no longer a candidate for recon.

A year and a half ago I started seeing a new onc ( mine retired) and she asked why I had decided not to recon as I am only 41 now. I explained everything to her and she cried for me. She has done so much to get me here, now, to a surgery date for bilateral diep.

So, now more than 6 years into my journey I have a little hope of regaining a little normalcy. Part of ending my marriage that was difficult was I was trying to come to terms with being alone for the rest of my life. I couldn't imagine being with anyone because of the embarrassment of trying to explain the whole bc thing and the removal of my breasts at night and putting them on in the morning. I believe this surgery is going to be a huge step in my healing process.

Thanks for getting it and thanks for listening!

Sherry

LOL, sbelizabeth.  I am gathering you are not a big fan of housework. hehehehehe. I use to be OSD about it.  Over the last few years I became much more relaxed, thank goodness, or I would have one more issue to deal with right now. 

Is the PT helping your shoulder?  My right shoulder hurts a little when I wake up in the morning, and is a little stiffer than the other.  I am doing my Yoga now, although not to full capacity. I can feel it helping with my ROM.  I found myself stretching my arms when I woke up yesterday without even thinking about it. Baby steps.  I really need to get some cardio going, it's just so freaking hot here already. 

Oh Sherry, that is an unbelievable story, and journey you have been on.  Shame on your first doc. Where did they find the recurrence? If it was in the breast they refused to remove I would have lost it on them.  I am so glad you found a compassionate doctor to work with, and your new body is right around the corner.  Here's to be whole, and happy!!!!!

OMG..sherry, what a journey you have had. I bow to your courage. I will never, ever, complain about anything again, so very glad that you found yourself an Onc who "cares" for you...major hugs going out to you!!!!!!  TOWANDA!!!!!

Lyndamarie....congrats on saying goodbye to the drain. 

sbelizabeth, liefie....((((X)))) thanks. hmmm.....seems we have a budding "rap star" in our ranks...eh sbe????

Bailey...hang in there, you can do this. 

Janet......close to being done, I bet....rest easy now, and start the healing.

Dvygrl....yep, "God Bless US"!!!!

Sweetpickle, welcome to the other side, and happy you're doing well! That story about the morphine making you wanna fight is actually quite funny - lol! Just keep on the pain medication, and you will be fine. As far as the bent over thing and the activity, you seem to be right on track. Every day you will get better, and be able to do a little more. Pace yourself though and take it slow - you don't wanna compromize those precious new girls or your flat tummy, eh? Best wishes!

Thanks ladies! Truly thank you. I have made my way to these boards several times. First when diagnosed, then when I found the recurrence ( it was the same cancer in tissue that was left under my arm). Again when I started to feel like my marriage was on the rocks and thought it was just me and then about a month or two ago when I knew this surgery was going to happen.

I don't know anyone else who has been through this and I often beat myself up and say come on its been 6 years get over yourself but these are real feelings and bc is going to be part of my life for the rest of my life. I'm not dwelling on the bad but do have my days. It's not something we just "get over"!

Knowing that I can come here and vent, laugh, cry or just gather knowledge lightens my heart!

Bailey- sorry I'm so drain crazy (left over residual - LOL - even 6 mos later) that I said drain pain instead of drain crazy! Sorry!!!

SheChirple, be sure to get your thyroid level checked.  Mine was dead as a rock, and the only symptom I had was swelling in my feet and a feeling of puffiness in my face.

Wow sherry! Your story is unbelievable! I'm so glad you found the right doctor to take care of you. Better late than never. When I had my surgery I thought I was going to feel so insecure about myself. It has completely shocked me that it hasn't! The first two weeks were the worst ones. I have never been so motivated to take care of my body and realized how lucky I am to have this body. There's always worst, so I consider myself fortunate:)

Goldie, how many lymphs did your BS remove? I haven't have any trouble with my arms, but I only got 3 from the right and 2 from left.

Nicely done Kuka. Wish I had the nerve!

Way to go kuka, I love that!

I was ok with losing my breast. It wasn't a question I had! Just get all the cancer out! Little did I know back then that my husband took issue with my decisions and withdrew himself from me. My self esteem issues are rooted in that, not the cancer itself.

Don't get me wrong, I don't think getting breasts will make someone love me. I just think when I'm ready to get out there again( if that day comes) I will feel a whole lot more comfortable with myself.

I've had no choice but to keep my house clean ( I hate housework!) because it's for sale and there are showings popping up all the time. I like to be ready at a moments notice. Gotta get this sucker sold!

Kuka, I was really lucky in the lymph node department. I had a special procedure the day before my surgery that located and marked my sentinel node.  The next day when they injected the dye they knew exactly which node was the sentinel, and they did a biopsy, but left it intact.  So, I have a very small chance of lymphedema.  That is the one thing I can say about my breast surgeon.  The rest has been a nightmare because of her.  I just have to keep on move on. I am numb under my arms, but I am still tender.  Does that make sense.  I am sure it's a pretty common side effect of mx.

Oh, I have been meaning to ask you all this question.  The weirdest sensation I have since my bmx is that when I drink something cool I can feel it going down in a different way than before. Does anybody else know what I mean?  It's not that you feel it from the outside, but you feel the coolness as it goes down.

Off topic question, but I couldn't find a thread for it. I was told by all my docs cuz I have estrogen + receptors that I am to have no soy at all. Being hypothyroid I thought I was good at avoiding it. But we've been reading labels on food and literally everything has soy in it. If its processed, soy. Even my blessed chocolate!! I'm trying to decide how fanatical I need to get with this soy thing. Anyone else worrying about the food thing?

Dyvgrl, my onc said edemame and food-type soy was ok in reasonable amounts, but no soy supplements, such as isoflavone pills.  I checked around on the internet for research that addressed it, and what I found confirmed that.

I try to stay away from processed soy as much as I can, but I'm not OCD about it.  Just like I have a glass (or two) of wine once in a while.

If we try to enclose ourselves into a rigid, legalistic box of weight control, macrobiotics, no alcohol, no sugar, no saturated fat...we might not actually live longer, but it will sure FEEL longer.