will I ever emotionally feel "nomal" again??

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annika12
annika12 Member Posts: 433
edited June 2014 in Mental Health: Because Cancer Doesn't Just Affect Your Breasts

I know Im in the very beginning testing stages but I always been a socially active healthy person who loves to be around people. Now I wanna hide or just talk to survivors!!! Got the ok to play soccer witch I LOVE.....turned in to an anxiety attack and a feeling of being different. Also flipped out cuz my doctor called me......she wanted to give me a phone number and wish me a good weekend :( Maybe Im being hard on myself.....it hasn't been a week yet....MRI next.....one foot infront of the other... repeat!!!

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  • Ariom
    Ariom Member Posts: 6,197
    edited May 2013

    Hi annika, I am so sorry to hear you are having such a hard time with this.

    There is another poster here who gives very good advice, She always says, "Don't go there till you have to!"

    It sounds like you have gotten yourself all worked up and stressed out. Everyone here will tell you that the waiting for results is the worst. As humans we seem to gravitate to the negative when in fact, the opposite is probably true. You know that 80% of these breast issues turn out to be benign. There are many other things that this might be.

    Yes, you are being too hard on yourself, this is a time to do things you enjoy, take care of yourself and just ride out the wait.I know how hard it is, but the reality is, all this stressing won't make the slightest difference to the outcome, but it can make you sick from worry.

    Try to take a deep breath, and as you say, one foot in front of the other.

    I wish you all the best for a benign result!

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  • annika12
    annika12 Member Posts: 433
    edited May 2013

    I allready tested positive in the lymph node the testing is to find the source. I know I have metastatic carcinoma with papillary features but not been staged or found where its from though they are 90% sure its the left breast. Its a beautiful day out there today so Im gonna go enjoy it :)

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  • Lily55
    Lily55 Member Posts: 3,534
    edited May 2013

    It depends on your results, you cannot make this experience not happen so you will be different......its best to live in the present......

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited May 2013

    You may not believe it at this point, but it is possible to get to the other side of this and in some ways feel stronger than you ever did before! I just started cycling last year, stopped for a while during surgeries and recoveries and am now starting to get close to where I was before! In some ways I even think I'm better, because the fears I had before seem so insignificant now...I ride a bit faster and more aggressive now, cuz I'm ALIVE!!!! And now I notice every bit of being that way!



    And we ARE having gorgeous weather today so LIVE IT UP!! :-)

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited May 2013

    P.S.

    I LOVE that about our Dr!!

    She called me the night before my surgery just to verify, clarify, etc. i told her to please get a good night's sleep! She's wonderful...

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  • Ariom
    Ariom Member Posts: 6,197
    edited May 2013

    Annika, I am so sorry, but your post only said you were going to have a MRI, and were at the testing phase. I completely misunderstood.

    I had no idea you'd had a Dx, it isn't anywhere in your post.

    I still wish you all the very best with your testing, and hope you can get some rest so you won't sress your body so much.

    Sounds like great advice from Dulcigirl too!

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  • annika12
    annika12 Member Posts: 433
    edited May 2013

    Its ok :) My brain is going a million miles an hour and not sure what Im typing or saying. I had a good day and Im gonna have many more :) Hope you also enjoyed yours!!

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  • annika12
    annika12 Member Posts: 433
    edited May 2013

    Thank you!! It gives me hope and something to look forward too!!

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