January 2013 chemo group

Re: hair loss... Most of mine came out an Saturday. I shaved the rest as close as I could and then put a little cotton sleeping hat (skull cap) on it and forgot about it. The rest has been slowly coming out without me even noticing. I wore my "dress up" wig out to a party with friends on Saturday night and they really liked it...in fact one of the men must have told me 5 times how much he liked my look! And he meant it....hummmmm I knew I had bad hair, but really? Was it that bad??? Anyway, my wigs are my new best friends hahah...

LeeA, you have to post a picture for us to see. Lol

jayjayc - I love your avatar and I love your idea ("from hair to wig without passing go - or mirrors").  Wow.  You seriously have captured my entire hair crisis with that one sentence.  

I feel silly calling it a crisis, I mean - I've given up two breasts (one of them supposedly perfectly fine) for this cause but gee whiz, this hair thing has really thrown me for a loop.  I knew it would.  Or I figured it would - but I didn't think I would be quite this stubborn about taking the clippers to it.  

Tonight I dragged out a wicker basket full of hats I had in the closet.  Hats I haven't tried on for years.  Each one looked more ridiculous than the one before. I've never worn hats because I look like a damn fool in hats.  And I have wig-regret.  I'm really glad I don't have to go too many places and even gladder I don't know too many people.  And it's not like I had great hair.  I didn't.  My mom has always been blessed with thick, full hair - even now that she's in her seventies.  Mine, on the other hand, has been flyaway and fine.  

I probably really was a candidate for the cold caps but too late now.  Waaayyyy too late now. 

Welcome to the group, jayjayc.  I also like the wording on "new to this whole mess."  Amen, sister.  What a not-so-fine mess it is. 

And I see you're on the Herceptin ride as well.  Wheeeeee!  

LeeA you really get it and now I don't feel as silly as I did.....



I don't want to jinx myself but I've been really lucky so far (except of course for that pesky cancer thing) I just had the lumpectomy and sentinel node removed and skipped the really scary chemo by just doing weekly taxol and herciptin..... So I knew keeping my hair was probably asking to much...... But I really really wanted to keep it..... I'm like your mom and my hair has always been the one thing I got complemented on..... I mean even during the early stages of treatment I had nurses compliment my hair Two different times...... And how stupid does that make them..... It was long and auburn.......



i cut it too shoulder length last week and cried on my way home but had really started to like it and then bam.... You know how cats shed, well that's me now......and heaven forbid I run fingers through it ...... I end up with a handful.... I did fine myself almost laughing at work today when I started pulling pieces off my sweater.....



But bald.... I just know I'll have a funny looking head with moles and zits and who knows what else....



Thanks for making me feel less alone

Carpet and drapes FINALLY MATCH!!!! LOLOLOLOLOL oh dear I knew this would be the bunch of women I'd love. So, no hair, no leg hair, pit hair, down there hair, etc... I feel like a siamese cat. I guess now they (the guys) cant bitch when there is hair in the drain. HA!

Bryona- I too find it rude that this cold made itself comfy in my body. It can leave now.

Colleen- Hope you are feeling ok from happy hour. My nurse told me to alternate the anti nausea meds to see which ones worked the best. And I definitely take the ativan before sleep. Stay hydrated!!! Eat what you can handle. keep your strength up... (my face felt flush with the steroids the first day or so... no numbness)

Jubby- Welcome back from the fog. Sorry you caught your sons cold. Same over here on that end. Kids... they are magnets for germs.

jayjayc- I had bra strap long hair. I cut it short a few days after xmas and then a pixie cut a week or so after my first TX. I was afraid to be bald.  I was so scared that I would have some weird lumps on my head. I has my DH buzz it and I had about a 1/8 inch long haircut.. oddly, I liked it like that. Now I am almost completely bald. just some stubble left. Just another hurdle in our journey.

Good morning to all of you! I am so blessed to have found all of you. Who suggested that we needed a little village where we all could live close by during our treatments? Fantastic idea! Think of the roar of laughter coning from the village walls!!!

Round 2 done! Still not sure if I will have 4 or 6. I do remember( at least I think I do ) MO telling me that if I do good through the treatments then I will definately do 6 or if I get sick I will need just 4. Does that make sense? I have not been "sick" thanks to all of the anti nausea meds. I do have terrible aches & pains though. An awful rash has also developed along my would be hairline & my upper back. It's extremely itchy & looks horrible.

My hair is pretty much gone, I have a wig but have yet to wear it. I need to take it in to be trimmed up & thinned out . Maybe then I will wear it. It feels so fake as it is. I have some beanie style hats but need scarves or lighter hats that I can wear indoors & not be so hot. I''m sure there is probably a thread as to where to buy hats & scarves online & such but I missed it. Suggestions welcome please.

Good morning, ladies (and men - if there are any insane enough to lurk) -

Paula, Donald Trump?  I wish!  I had Donald Trump mornings when I had shoulder-length hair.  

I went a little crazy with the clippers last night after my husband fell asleep.  I tried to shave off what was left but now I look like I'm ready for those FEMA camps that Jesse Ventura blathers on about - but in my case it's FELINE EMERGENCY MANGE ACT.  

My husband calls these things he's offered up to do the job "clippers" but I think it's really a beard trimmer (or an eyebrow shaper).  Maybe I'll just take my damn Ped-Egg to it when I've woken up enough (no, no, I won't - I'm not that stupid/sadistic).

At 12:05 a.m. I went out for the first time since the Neulasta shot last Thursday.

 I donned one of the borrowed Buffs and went to pick up the refill for the anti-nausea med thinking it would be the best time to avoid germs/people.  I was semi-right but as I was waiting in one of the militaristic lines (you know, the HIPPAA, you wait here, they wait there, keep your head down, don't listen, don't step over the line) this man approaches me from the side and says "I don't think you want to wait behind her" - I'm all like WTF - don't come near me, I'm out at this hour for a reason (in my mind, that is) but in reality, I politely turned, in my buff, and said "I beg your pardon?" and at that point the woman at the counter, who must have been his wife, significant other, whatever, turns (from that somewhat safe HIPPAA distance) and she's wearing a hospital mask (!!!).  He proceeds to say "we called in our prescription - you might want to wait in the other line."  

Mine had been called in as well.  Probably long before hers was or perhaps before she even needed that hospital mask because my husband is an anal, first-born mensa who does everything on time or before time.  

I tried to give him the politest look I could muster without screaming "WHY THE H DOUBLE HOCKEY STICKS IS YOUR WIFE WEARING A HOSPITAL MASK" and assured him that I was, indeed, in the right line - i.e. I've been to this rodeo/CVS before, Mr. Line Organizer, in fact, often enough to get $25 rewards coupons every few months because of all the money we plunk down while we're there getting our various and sundry prescriptions. 

So, in summary, I stealthily go out past midnight on a double-pronged mission (first time out with the used buff + shorter line/fewer germs at that hour) and for the first time ever a man approaches me in line (I was the line) AND the woman I'm due to replace at the counter is decked out in a hospital mask.  

There isn't enough hand sanitizer for this sh*t, ladies.  

Unfortunately, my boy in the bubble suit got delayed in shipping along with my Jetsonmobile somewhere back in the seventies.  Oh, and that Race for the Cure™?  Missed that as well.   

Soon, I must get up and look what I've done to my hair, ma, (the older ones might get that reference to the old Melanie Safka song - recently redone by Miley Cyrus) in the cold, hard light of day. 

Have you ever had one of those urges to just get in your car and keep on driving until you drive off the planet?  I've had those crazy urges from time to time since childhood and late last night, driving back from the drugstore, was one of those times.  Of course, we can't drive away from cancer.  We're tethered to it like bald old (I'm speaking for myself here) balls at the end of raggedy cotton ropes (or IV lines).

This is my rant.  It won't happen again.  Hopefully.  

I shall sit in my corner with my lint/hair roller and drool bib and be good for the rest of the day!  YaY Cancer!  

p.s. I wish you all a peaceful day with little to no side effects - and free of hair-pulling (it's ill-advised ) angst.

Paula, you're right.  I might have been standing within feet of my OCD germ soul sister and not even known it.  Ships that pass in the night!  

I just wish she would have kept her dinghy (husband) on a shorter leash/rope as  he was definitely too in my non-masked face for comfort, i.e. the least she could have done was masked him as well!  

Also, Skigirl, I love "down there hair" (I mean, I don't love it - but I love your term for it because it's edgy and almost Dr. Seuss-ish).  And from what I've observed, that hair is wired differently (no pun intended).  Perhaps its genetic purpose is more important than that of the hair on our head, i.e. to serve and protect (heh) our sacred area of fertility.  What was it Voltaire said?  God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh.  

LeeA,

You cracked me up. Yes I have wanted to drive and never come back unfortunatly, wherever I go, there I will be. Obviously I would be taking me with me. For some reason that reminded me of Jimmy Buffet song "Take the weather with you." Great song.

Love people who wear masks and don't know what they are doing. There is a special mask made by 3M called a N-95 that patients or family will pick up in hospitals sometimes, because they are stupid and don't ask for what they need or want. Anyway that mask is used for pts with TB or suspected of TB. The mask doesn't let the person wearing it to release their germs into the air, instead they suck in all the germs out in the environment. It is to protect us/others not the pt. with TB. So the moral of the story is if you are gonna wear a mask be sure and get the right kind. I had a pt come in who is super prejudiced about everything and everyone. He will say they are sick they shouldn't be here, EXCUSE me we are here for sick people. Anyway he came in with a TB mask on one day and I asked him if there was any reason he was keeping his germs from being released into the environment and sucking all the other dirty germs into his lungs. If I thought I would have been able to get back up I would have layed on the floor and laughed my ass off. He is a prick towards other patients and deserved it.

Enough: Sorry for your issue Lee but I would have asked Mr. I am in charge of telling the world what to do, why wifey didn't stay home if sick and he pick up her RX.

Sheryl

kimmeam,

http://www.goodwishesscarves.org/

This site will send you a free head cover, it will take about 4-6 weeks but hey it's free and you will still need it for awhile.

Sheryl

the one with the zebra... lol or the pink unicorn.

Woke up today feeling "normal".  Yay!  So glad that is over with. 

LeeA - You have cracked me up today.  Fortunately, only people in this same situation can say that and get away with it because we know how you feel.  I haven't had the same feeling about my hair though.  I just don't care about it.  I'm too concerned about getting all this crap out of my body to worry about my hair and what other people think.  My motto through all of this has been, I can't change it so it's time to fix it and to hell with what other people think.  As for the old lady and gentleman in the pharmacy, I'm wondering if he was warning you not to get too close because she had something that was contagious and didn't want you getting it.  Not that he was afraid you were going to pass something on to her.  I'm extremely claustrophobic and the thought of those masks sends me into a tail spin.  If the woman did have something contagious, she should have kept her junky butt in the car and let her hubby get her prescription for her instead of lerking around the line pissing people off.  Agreed on that one 100%. 

Smethot - I looked up some of the hats that you choose and they are adorable and I love them.  I have a few scarves and buffs and a couple hats myself, but I love those newsboy hats and will have to get one of those.  Keep your chin up and remember you are sooooooo not alone in this.  You too, have succeeded in making me smile today.  Thank you. 

I'm venturing out shortly to go to the bank and to get pet food.  I know you are all so jealous but since I haven't been out since Saturday, this is a big deal.  If all goes well, I'm going to work tomorrow.  Fingers are crossed!

BTW, My Sister in law brought me a piece of peanut butter pie from Frisches and OMG it was the best thing I had ate in days.  I know not on the healthy list, but it was so good!  Nikki, I know you are from the area so give it a shot.

And finally, after rereading my last post, I have realized I shouldn't post on my tablet.  Looks like I was having a mental lapse in my typing.  Good grief.  Sorry about that.

...its pugs...google them...they ALLLLLL look like crack pugs...i have 2 myself...they ARE crack pugs...maybe i'll start rotating avatars...a crack-pug-a-day-calendar?

The Headcovers hats are really nice.  The only thing that chapped my ass was that they charged me extra +++ shipping & handling.  Not because i live in Canada- I'm used paying extra S & H because Americans think i live in an igloo and travel by dogsled- but because I live in SOUTHERN ONTARIO which Headcovered deemed to be "remote".  Now let me tell you, i live in the most populous place in Canada.  Southern Ontario is home to over 92 per cent, or 12.1 million, of Ontario's total population of 13.1 million people.  One of the most population-dense places in Canada.  I do not live in Nunavut.  Or Northern Ontario.  Its absolutely insane...FEX ED (who delivers for Headcovers) has 2 depots in my city...but its remote and i have to pay extra.  But other than that...nice hats.