January 2013 chemo group

Julie enjoy silver linings-they filmed that in our neighborhood-and that BC always brings a smile to my face.

Teacherjulief welcome.

Cancernoway I have been dealing with neck pain since my first treatment. I was thinking it was taxol but herceptin is the other offender.

Not having a good day-very weepy and mean today- which is very unlike my normal self. My poor family walking on eggshells so i bit my tongue and took a nap. But as usual these boards put me back in perspective so thanks bellas.

Hi everyone

I'm new on these forums even though I read them all the time to get strength from others and comfort I'm not the only one. I have a 3 yr old daughter who means the world to me, I have to fight this. I have done 3 of my a/c treatments one more to go. I seem to just get tired a few days later. ( knock on wood).

teacherjulie, ciao bella! Welcome to our family. I'm 43 and a teacher, too; we have lots of teachers in this group.

kiwikid, what are the chances you could switch your tx to Fridays? You'd have to take off 6 school days (the day of tx and the following week), but that would give you a chance to get through the worst of the SEs and to have your WBC rebound over that second weekend? That's what I was going to do before the whole dose-dense thing threw a wrench in the gears...

louise, welcome back! We are a chatty bunch... well, everyone but me. I'm quiet and shy.

Nikki, my tongue is the reason I'm avoiding all of those acidic and spicy foods; they all feel like they're going to burn a hole right through my tongue. With bland foods and the baking soda mouthwash, I'm just about able to stay ahead of it.

Skigirl, I'm glad to hear this round isn't treating you too badly. I know you were wanting to try going back to work: What's going on with that?

skimommi, so sorry to hear that this one is rougher. I was afraid it might be; you were pretty quiet yesterday. You just let yourself be a little weepy in the morning, and who cares if you can't remember the movie. It'll still be around when this crap is all over, and you'll find out if it was worth watching then. And just so you know, if it were possible, I would like to punch your chemo and your cancer right in the face. POW! Leave our Melissa alone!

gr8flmama, it's tough to know you're snapping at other people, isn't it? When I feel like that, I just want them all to stay away from me so I don't have to worry about them, and that makes me feel guilty, too. Sending you big hugs and a punching bag to take out your anger on. I drew a cancer face on it so you'd know what you're really mad at.

Italflamingo, welcome to the best club in the world that no one ever wanted to join. I know at least a couple of people here are using Brian Joseph to try to protect lashes/brows; I'm sure they'll chime in. I'm taking the ostrich approach, myself: If I just don't look at them, they won't fall out.

Guess what I did today, ladies! I walked a 15-minute mile without my heart pounding! Yeah, who's the boss now?!

Jubby, the stomach cramping sounds horrendous!  I had some lower GI burning but nothing like what you've described.  I'm so sorry you had to go through all that and I hope it has passed (and I hope your oncologist can address it for the next go-round).  Also, re: eating - I had the best intentions for round 1 and round 2 but in the midst of it all, it's whatever seems the least bit palatable. 

Bryona, woo hoo on the 15 minute mile - sans heart pounding.  I'm so annoyed with myself that I haven't done my 30 minutes of walking the last two days but I've just been too wiped out to attempt it.  I keep thinking "maybe I'm not really that wiped out but just faking it" (but I don't think so - this is just me piling more guilt on myself).  I've been thinking about the heart pounding thing - did you have a Neulasta shot?  I did not have one the first round but did have one on Thursday and one of the most annoying side effects since then has been lying in bed "hearing" my heart/pulse pound (I'm guessing everyone knows what I'm talking about).  It seems like it's pounding faster than usual and being the ostrich that I am, I don't even want to take my BP to see what's going on.  I did not experience this following the first treatment.  Last night I played a biaural beats (?) recording to try to relax somewhat.  I had downloaded it when an acupuncturist gave me a 30 minute standing still qi gong stance (note:  I did that all of two nights!).  This is for the birds but this, too, shall pass, and now I'm worried that the hair I set out for the birds (underneath a rock) might be too toxic for them (chemo hair).  I need to go outside and see if it's still there.  The last thing I want to have happen is more damage to the local environment due to my stupidity. 

italflamingo, welcome to the group.  You might also be interested in checking out the triple positive thread (if you haven't already):  http://community.breastcancer.org/forum/80/topic/764183?page=497#idx_14889

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Today I took a nap with what must have been lucid dreaming.  Wow.  The details were incredible, right down to details on houses, pottery, etc.  I was lost on several country roads back in Indiana and the very end of the dream ended up being breast cancer related (of course!).  I walked into a little farmhouse that advertised food for sale and the floors were so rickety in spots that I was afraid I would fall through.  I asked the woman taking the money how she was doing and she said "fine, if you count having breast cancer as being fine."  The weird thing is, she looked like a photo of someone I've seen on one of the other threads and that woman looks like a woman I've seen in real life (and have wondered if she is the same person I saw at a local restaurant).   Ahhhh, the surreal world of breast cancer.  It seeps into our every waking (and sleeping) moment!  (or at least into mine)

I had my first chemo treatment on January 21st, wasn't sure what to expect.  It has not been a good first week.  I have lost 10 pounds and it seems the only things I can eat is jello and Ensure. By no means am I complaining because I know it could be a lot worse. 

Lauren15 - My thoughts and prayers are with you!  I hope they can get this resolved as quickly as possible.  I remember how slowly things seemed to move in the hospital on weekends back when my husband was in for a month.  Hopefully, everything can be resolved asap Monday morning/afternoon.  Big, big hugs!

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shawkins64 - Thanks for joining us!  One of my friends said she would lose 10-12 pounds after every treatment but she would end up gaining about five of it back by the next time.  I'm sorry you haven't had the best week and as Bryona, or perhaps it was someone else, has said - it's okay to complain!  You're with people who understand!  Again, welcome - but sorry you have to be here.  Also, thanks for bringing up jello.  I might give that a try as well.  

Skimommi and kiwikid my neck and shoulders are killing me too...so glad to hear others feel the same ....started during tx#1 and nurses did not think it was a SE, glad we are all on the same page!  Anyone know why today my face looks like a 16 yr old's - 5 pimples overnight-as if everything else wasn't enough!!

Lauren,

So sorry you are going through all the extra shit, breast cancer and treatment is bad enough. The shortness of breath could be just because of being ill and a fever. How are you oxygen saturations? That is where they put that little clip on your finger when they are taking  your blood pressure and temperature. Hang in there Lauren this nightmare will end and you are in the best place when you are so ill. I had sent you my phone number in a private message a couple of weeks ago and will do so again. Please call me if you just need a voice to listen who understands.

Hugs to you, Sheryl

kiwikid,

this is from the American Cancer Society web site they have lots of good information about the production of blood cells. www.cancer.org

"The lowest count that blood cell levels fall to after chemotherapy is called the nadir. The nadir for each blood cell type will occur at different times. Usually WBCs and platelets will reach their nadir within 7 to 14 days. Because RBCs live longer, they will typically take a few weeks to reach their nadir. Within 3 or 4 weeks after treatment, the blood counts improve and start to approach normal levels."

Sheryl

Heading for the second round tomorrow.

Hope you all, feel better, and have a good week.

(((hugs)))

Skigirl...And how do you get the Buff to look good - I can not figure the darn thing out at all!!  Bought one last week and gave up on it after a day of trying to get it on and look ok!! partly out of denial of needing it and partly out of just feeling stupid for not being able to follow the directions....and you look great with a shaved head, WOW!

Thanks for the welcome!  Lauren, I hope you are feeling better soon.  You are all so brave and the support here is great!  I am just anxious to get started so I know what I am dealing with.  The waiting is hard.  One question, are the side effects cumulative or does it just depend on the person?  In other words, is each treatment harder than the ones before?  Hope you all have a good week.

I have great news and terrible news. Great news is that my scans show my bones are clear!! Woot woot!!



Bad news is that chemo is delayed and I'm not sure until when exactly. So my CT showed that my port ...you know, the one that collapsed my lung and gave me a chest tube...was not put in properly. They couldn't tell whether it was in the wrong vein or in a vein at all. So I had to rush to the other hospital for emergency surgery.



It turned out to be much more complicated, once we were there and consulting with the many specialists. The port was installed into the major artery supplying blood to my arm. The artery was probably damaged and would need a stent. They were hoping to be able to reach it without having to crack open my chest. It was incredibly scary as I was told that it was dangerously close to a vessel that supplies blood to the back of my brain and It would either be stented (stroke risk) or sacrificed and severed (loss of brain function).



I went into that OR not knowing whether I'd come out or whether I'd still be me when I did. I went in only having said I love you and have a good day to my children that morning.



My husband was told, when it got very dicey, it was worse than they thought. That he needed to call family, get a priest, and expect the worst. When they took the catheter out, I bled profusely and they weren't sure they could stop it. They saved me though. They fixed me.



I had a transfusion. I then had to go completely under to have the blood drained from my lungs and get another. Effing. Chest. Tube.



I spent the weekend in the hospital, but thankfully, they took the tube out this afternoon and sent me home. I'm not showing signs of stroke or brain loss. My children have never looked more beautiful to me.



So I don't have a port. It has to be redone. But by the guys who saved me, which is who I should've gone to In the beginning. It wasn't that I didn't ask the questions of how many shes done (hundreds and hundreds) or how many times she's had complications (2).



It's been a nightmare. But I'm so thankful and grateful to be alive.



I do hope you're all doing well.

teacherjulief - I think it varies for everyone although the integrative physician I met with last week said that there can be a build-up but then there's a plateau (according to her; note: I don't know if she is a cancer survivor or not but she used to be a radiation oncologist). 

I'm more fatigued with the second go-round but I'm also 54 years old so I don't know if that has anything to do with it or not.  I will say what I've said before and that's this:  it is doable (my favorite word for it) and they say it's nothing like it used to be even a decade or two ago (even the integrative physician mentioned this).  For one thing, the anti-nausea meds are profoundly better than they were in the past.  

I have followed the suggestions of people here as well as my oncology nurses and have taken the anti-nausea meds at the exact intervals suggested as they say it's easier to keep it under control if you're not chasing it back (i.e. after it gets started).  On the other hand, I've read accounts from other people - perhaps on this thread (or others?) who say they haven't needed the anti-nausea meds at all.

At the beginning of this so-called cancer experience a friend I met on the beach in Kauai emailed me and told me about an older lady she met on the same beach who told her the following:  in any situation you encounter imagine the best possible outcome.  She emailed me that very early in my diagnosis and I've tried to keep it in mind with every step along the way. 

You're welcome, Skigirl.  I wasn't sure if you were still around and although my body feels like lead - my mind is hyper (as are my fingertips :-)

I need to watch the video as well.  

You look great in yours.  I haven't tried either one on yet but I actually stuck one in my purse the day my hair started falling out at shoulder-length about nine days ago.  LOL!  I had no IDEA what hair falling out would REALLY be like until this weekend but I'm stupid/stubborn and still haven't done the inevitable (shave off what little is left).