Stressed over upcoming surgery path report!!

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alcb70
alcb70 Member Posts: 166

Hi everyone! I am having a bilateral mastectomy with lymph node dissection on Feb 8th.  I had a biopsy on one enlarged lymph node when I was diagnosed.  The lymph node was 2.5 cm and completely taken over by cancer (no evidence of lymphatic tissue left, but on original tumor it was positive for lymphatic/vascular involvement).  I have lived with this now 3 months, and know that I have one node positive...doesn't seem all that bad (except that it was REALLY positive).  I keep worrying that I'm going to wake up after surgery and they're going to tell me that I actually had evidence of cancer in a bunch of nodes.  When I was first diagnosed, I had it in my head (intuition vs fear???) that I was going to come back at a stage III.  I did have a negative PET scan (thank goodness), and I am responding well to chemo (thank goodness), but I am just dreading this report.  Honestly, we can't predict the future, and I could die in 5 yrs at a stage II or survive 30 yrs at a stage III.....but I can't help but try and "number crunch" the statistics.

Has anyone else had a lymph node taken over like mine?  If so, how did your path turn out?  Just trying to figure out what my chances are. :) MO is thinking I'll be in remission by surgery, so he won't even tell me what he thinks my chances are of recurrence or mets later (kind of like saying that if the chemo works so well now.....no worries later).  In the same conversation though, he tells me that I should start Zometa (for osteoporosis) because I have a spine issue that may mask bone mets pain in my spine (and the Zometa supposedly decreases bone mets by 1/3).  UUUGGHHH  where is that crystal ball!!!????  I can't sleep worth a crap and I just sit up crying thinking my family is going to have to hear & process more bad news after surgery.  Maybe it's the chemo induced menopause!? Hormones are all over the place!   Thanks!

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  • dlb823
    dlb823 Member Posts: 9,430
    edited January 2013

    alcb, with neo-adjuvant chemo, it's difficult to tell if you would have had more involved nodes, especially if you've had a really good response to the chemo, which should have also shrunk your tumor. 

    I also had a really funky node.  No lymph or vascular invasion, but a lot of extracapsular extension.  I had 15 additional nodes removed in an ALND along with my mx, and I was sure I would have more positive ones since the one that was positive was so overloaded with bc.  But they were all clear.

    I'm so sorry you're so stressed about your surgery, but I think the roller coaster of emotions and fear is just part of what we go through.  Hopefully, you'll have no more bad news, but the fear you've described is very normal. Once your surgery is behind you, it should get easier.  (((Hugs)))  Deanna

  • alcb70
    alcb70 Member Posts: 166
    edited January 2013

    Thanks Deanna!  My MO did tell me that the chemo could/probably would kill off evidence in the other nodes...so yet another glitch.  I think I'm just trying to find some sort of control in all this craziness, but really there is none. :)  I guess I need to just focus on getting it out, and once that is done....take it day by day. :) (I just have to repeat this to myself about a million times a day)

  • Shari0707
    Shari0707 Member Posts: 448
    edited January 2013

    I too a, doing neoadjuvant chemo and am stressed for when path report comes out.. I know I had at least one positive node before chemo.. Not really sure how many.... Know I am going to have mastectomy but then my issue is also radiation... Depending on path report, Do I have radiation in node area even after chemo and mastectomy if none of nodes r still positive ..even thought I knew I had one positve before or do I radiate only if I still have positive nodes after chemo.. I am 31 and don't want this to ever come back... I just want to throw everything at it while I can.. But the docs say that if there is nothing in the nodes coms surgery time it would b overkill to radiate it.. Any thoughts on the matter? I ask alcb70 bc in ur profile it says rads... Ur doing rads regardless or only if there is anything I nodes after chemo..ll

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