How many tears can one cry?

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Hi Everyone.  I joined this forum back in November when I was diagnosed with DCIS.  This, however, is my first post.  I underwent a lumpectomy and sentinel node biopsy on 12/11/12.  Fortunately, my lymph nodes came back clear of cancer and the cancer in my milk ducts is Stage 1!  The bad news was that I had to have a re-excision on 12/24/12. 

At this point, the pathology report from the 12/24 surgery has not come back so I've been in limbo since then.  I have spent the last three days sobbing, sobbing and more sobbing!  I think that everything finally caught up with me and it needed to be released.

I feel like cancer has taken over my entire life.  I want those results so I can move forward with treatment!!!!

Theresa

Comments

  • ridergirl
    ridergirl Member Posts: 443
    edited January 2013

    Theresa

    This waiting, or limbo, stage as you called it is I think the worst part for everyone. I know there is no 'good' kind of cancer but the good part for you is it sounds like it was discovered early. I know that the waiting part is awful, like ok now i know i have this thing lets do something about it, and seems to take forever. But hopefully soon enough you will have a plan in place and from then on you have something to focus on instead of just the general worrying about every possibility, which can drive us all mad.  In the meantime I'm glad you have decided to post here, keep coming back to ask questions, scream, rant or whatever seems to help.  There are a lot of wonderful knowledgeable ladies on this board who will be glad to answer questions and offer you support however we can. I couldn't have got this far without them...we are all here for you too

    (((((big hugs)))

  • Maureen1
    Maureen1 Member Posts: 614
    edited January 2013

    So sorry TheresaI hope you don't feel alone...cancer does take over our lives, at least in the beginning when there are more questions than answers and our waking moments are spent trying to understand what just happened...I don't know about you but I thought my life was pretty "normal" and "stable". I was "so healthy", no high blood pressure, no heart disease, no diabetes...NO Medications, just vitamins - how could I have cancer? Your pathology report will give you more information so you can set a course of treatment and see yourself as a fighter and a survivor! If it does not answer all the questions then your doctors will order more tests - more information is good:) Until then, and whenever you need to - cry, it's okay to cry...it does let out the emotions. Sometimes I cry "for no reason", I just become overwhelmed with it all and how fast it has happened, other times I feel hopeful and strong - I like those times, they happen more often now then they did when I was first diagnosed...take care, folks are here for you, you are not alone in this...(((hugs))) Maureen 

  • PeggySull
    PeggySull Member Posts: 686
    edited January 2013

    Theresa, every single woman I've talked to said the hardest emotional time was the infernal waiting. ( The physical challenges come later). I cried and cried while waiting.



    Somewhere, I can't remember where, I read that breast cancer patients who felt and expressed their emotions (e.g., crying) early on felt worse then but actually had a better adjustment in the long run than those who pushed their emotions away and became solely task oriented.



    As I have read through many posts here I see that over time members lives gradually become less dominated by the diagnosis, but I think during diagnosis and active treatment it is normal to be preoccupied by the illness.



    The waiting is excruciating. I hope by the time you read this post you will have the answers you need to move forward.



    Peggy

  • Faes
    Faes Member Posts: 3
    edited January 2013

    Hello Theresa,

    I can certainly relate to how you are feeling. I was diagnosed with DCIS on 12/3/2012. It has been a roller coaster for me too. I was sitting here @1:35p.m. thinking about my pre-op tomorrow and surgery on Tuesday and a million other things. I sat here and shed tears earlier but I believe all will be well. For me, I don't like the unknown plus all my adult life I have always been in control of all things related to my well-being...at least I though I was. After the surgery I will have to wait for at least two days for the outcome of surgery. So with this one, I will have to rely on prayers, faith, and my Saviour God. I believe the various post will help many along the way. I pray that all goes well with you...I don't have to know you to say a prayer for you.

  • Maureen1
    Maureen1 Member Posts: 614
    edited January 2013

    Good luck with surgery tomorow Faes...you're in my thoughts and prayers...Maureen

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